Simone Dadoun-Cohen is an entrepreneur, former exotic dancer, wife, mother of three, and pot-stirrer. Her website, EstablishedMen.com, seems recession-proof, as it counts over 250,000 affluent men and beautiful young women among its members.
It does seem to be tailored to hypergamy, does it not? Or if not that, exploitation. Either way, if is not good for society.
Momlogic:Tell me how you came up with the idea for Established Men.
Simone Dadoun-Cohen: I’m 30 right now, but when I was in my very early twenties, I needed to support myself and pay for school. I decided to work at a gentlemen’s club.
One would have thought, horrible experience, seedy environment, but it was the complete opposite. It was actually a fabulous experience. I had the opportunity to dance for some of the most influential men in the city. They were intelligent, educated, successful, and definitely generous.
Being in that type of environment, I came to wonder, where would I actually meet a man like this? Where could a young, beautiful, ambitious woman find a man like that outside of a strip club?
Really, were these fellas that awesome? All of them? I suppose that is why there are bouncers. It just takes one you know, for good or bad.
Many of the men might have been intelligent, successful, educated, etc., but what of their character? Probably that doesn’t play into hypergamy, not like money and/or power.
I actually met my husband at the gentlemen’s club, and that inspired me to give back to the rest of the female community and give them the opportunity to meet a man of that caliber, so they too could go ahead and meet someone they were truly compatible with, to build a life with.
This is a sugar-daddy site that has been set up. I guess it is a rent-to-own site.
So what does compatible mean? A fella that has money? And if he has the money, well stuff has already been pretty much built, and she didn’t have anything to do with it.
Could these women be compatible with men without lots of money?
We don’t have a transactional component to the website. Some of the other websites in the “sugar daddy” space, most of them do — where women will actually put into their profile that this is the allowance that they require.
We don’t have that. It’s not about dollars and cents. It’s about building that mutually beneficial commonality, that lifestyle together. I understand why people ask, but it’s really something they don’t understand.
So we just put our head in the sand and pretend.
ML: With a website that focuses on “beautiful women” who date “established men,” as a mom, when the time comes, what message does this send to your kids? How will you handle your daughter’s self-image issues as she enters the dating arena?
SDC: When I say “beautiful, ambitious women,” it’s not about who I find beautiful, or even who the men on the site find beautiful. It’s that they find themselves beautiful. I went through a time when I felt inadequate—regardless of how I looked. It’s really important to dig deep and find things that make you feel beautiful.
As for the message, it be “let your inner hypergamy run wild”. Or perhaps, “exploit what you got no matter the cost to your future self, future kids, or society as a whole”.
As for ambitious, it seems that it is all about latching onto a man’s money. I suppose that is type of ambition.
So I wonder what digging deep to find things that make you beautiful result in. Probably nothing that I as a grounded guy can relate to.
My 6-year-old recently came to me, wishing her hair or eyes were a different color. We made a list of all the things that are fabulous about her—it didn’t come from me, it was her responsibility.
Then we actually made a circle around all those beautiful attributes, and around the circumference, we wrote the names of all the people that love her, so she could see how important she is and how beautiful she is to all these people.
She has it up on her wall, and it helped reinforce to her how incredible she is.
That never happened to me as a kid. It never happened to my sisters either. No adult every told us how incredible we were. I see problems ahead for this girl. When girls are introduced to heavy sexual selling of themselves (in this case through Mommy’s example and business) at an early age, is it ever good?
Exit question: Does she truly believe that she is actually helping the world?