At work we have an IT guy, mid thirties, tall and slim. At a meeting recently, it was suggested that he go talk to person X about some important matter. Well, he didn’t want to do that. It came out that he had no clue as to how to talk to the person on such a matter, as he didn’t know person X. There was plenty of evidence that he was shy, as he buried himself in his work, but this was unexpected from my perspective.
So how did something like this come to be? It is somewhat difficult to imagine this happening in days past, in the era of the Evil Patriarchy. Of course, things back then were not necessarily as they are sometimes portrayed, but men were not normally shrinking violets.
For boys and young men there seems to be a gauntlet, one that designed to make most of them fail. They are cowed, shamed and shunted aside from school age onward. Many retreat into a shell, for this seems easier. Furthermore, it also seems more productive that battling the odd system that they encounter.
What men such as this need is to have explained to them what has happened. Ideally they could make changes before it is too late. But how to explain it? How to approach such a fella? Ideas?