Gaslighting Yesterday And Today


From Wikipedia,

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which a person seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, making them question their own memory, perception, and sanity. Using persistent denial, misdirection, contradiction, and lying, gaslighting involves attempts to destabilize the victim and delegitimize the victim’s belief

In times past, the media did not really need to use this tactic, as they controlled the entire flow of information.  Still, seeds of doubt within people did occur.  Situations where “do you believe us or lying eyes” happened.  One place where this happened somewhat frequently in the past was with respect to Feminism.  It was sometimes difficult to convince women that they were unhappy and oppressed, but it was done.  Men were evil; and their Evil Patriarchy was the mechanism of implementing this evil.  It all worked; with present day women being much unhappier.

Flash forward to today.  Gaslighting has gone mainstream, being resorted to by the media (and lefties in general) far more than previously.  The problem is that their narratives are failing such that everybody can see (no, your eyes are not lying).  Furthermore, the web provides information and alternative views to spread easily (no more media monopoly).

The present example of this is the Joe and Hunter Biden issue with respect to the Ukraine.  Hunter Biden has no real talent other than getting in trouble; not being experienced in the energy business, not speaking Ukrainian.  Yet he was paid a fabulous amount by a Ukrainian energy company to “be on their board”.  It just so happened that Joe Biden, Vice President at the time, strong armed the Ukrainian Government to fire a prosecutor that was investigating said company.  Amazingly enough, the media is trying to tell us that there is nothing there.  I might say that this is a bridge too far for them.

Have you noticed how shrill Feminist types are these days?  The Kamala Harris’s, the Kirsten Gillibrand’s, etc.  The shrillness is a tip-off that the old BS isn’t working; that they have to turn it up a notch.  It is not clear how this will work out for them.  Hopefully poorly.

Exit question: How many people buy into being gaslighted, and who are they?

Posted in FarmBoy, Feminism, Lies
137 comments on “Gaslighting Yesterday And Today
  1. This is why I avoid such places with people whenever possible. You’re never going to see me anywhere near such an event. Yelling, “Nazi scum! Off our streets!” at an 80 yo woman with a walker, in Hamilton, Ontario?

    I honestly think violence is the answer in this case. Swift, horrible violence.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Farm Boy says:

    It’s as if they are pissing on you while telling you it’s raining.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. My father would have beat their asses. My grandfather would have beat their asses. But I would get arrested for beating their asses. That’s how far we have fallen.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Farm Boy says:

    Justin would not be able to physically beat their assses

    Liked by 1 person

  5. h0neyc0mb says:

    Things lost ..

    Are to many to count .. but let us reflect on just two ..

    Common sense is rather uncommon now .. and should thusly be re-named uncommon sense. Actually, that happened a long time ago come to think about it ..

    and

    Natural justice has been replaced and outlawed .. even in your own home.

    End-Times bro

    Liked by 2 people

  6. b g says:

    My wife did not believe the feminist crap, her father worked very hard to feed and house her family, plus her grandfather not only helped feed them but paid them to help. There was no oppressive, the family was working together..it was necessary.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. Cheque d'Out says:

    Said (by reliable people) to be very funny

    [Laughed I did]

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Farm Boy says:

    Report: Communist China Replacing Ten Commandments With Quotes by President Xi

    https://www.cnsnews.com/blog/michael-w-chapman/report-communist-china-replacing-ten-commandments-quotes-president-xi

    Actually, Winnie The Pooh quotes can be quite insightful

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Cheque d'Out says:

    Like

  10. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 3 people

  11. Cheque d'Out says:

    Gloves coming off

    Merkin, aka the EU, saying that they require Northern oreland to be annexed if the rest of Britain is to leave. No Tory leader, leader of the Conservative and Unionist Party, can agree to that. And Boris cannot now back down and stay…can he?

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Cheque d'Out says:

    Foster – PM’s proposals have flushed out EU’s real intentions

    ““The comments from the German Chancellor to the Prime Minister that Northern Ireland must remain in the EU Customs Union forever now reveal the real objective of Dublin and the European Union.

    For the United Kingdom to be asked to leave a part of its sovereign territory in a foreign organisation of which the UK would no longer be a part and over which we would have no say whatsoever is beyond crazy. No UK Government could ever concede such a surrender.

    The EU is not interested in a negotiated outcome at this time. Their position is the UK can only leave with a deal if it agrees a binding piece of international law permanently tying either the whole country or a part of it to the EU’s legal order over which it has no control.

    The true purpose of the “backstop” is now in the open for all to see. Those who eagerly supported the backstop as the best of both worlds can now see the error of that assessment. It was neither temporary nor an insurance policy.

    It appears that Martin Selmayr’s remarks about Northern Ireland being the price of Brexit is still the EU negotiating stance.

    The Prime Minister’s proposals have flushed out Dublin’s real intentions to trap Northern Ireland in the EU Customs Union forever, where Dublin rather than the United Kingdom’s elected representatives would be in the driving seat.

    We will not accept any such ultimatum or outcome.””

    Liked by 3 people

  15. Cheque d'Out says:

    FANTASTIC

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7549155/No10-warns-Boris-Johnson-fight-No-Deal-election-against-hostile-EU.html

    Boris Johnson warns Angela Merkel there will NEVER be a Brexit deal after German Chancellor demands Northern Ireland MUST stay in EU customs union in furious phone call

    Boris Johnson has gathered Cabinet after the standoff with the EU deepened

    PM clashed with Angela Merkel over NI customs plan in early-morning phone call

    No10 source admitted negotiations with EU seem doomed to collapse this week

    The aide warned that Tories will immediately switch to fight election on No Deal

    If EU tried to keep Britain in, defence and security cooperation could be affected

    Liked by 2 people

  16. Cheque d'Out says:

    When he’s right, he’s right

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 2 people

  18. Cheque d'Out says:

    OH NOES

    Oh wait. 1922?

    Liked by 4 people

  19. Liz says:

    Liked by 2 people

  20. Cheque d'Out says:

    LOL

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Cheque d'Out says:

    Anna Soubry having a bad time in the House

    Many, many salty tears being shed by remoaniacs

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Cheque d'Out says:

    Like

  23. Ironhorse says:

    I was at a baseball game recently. There was a group of Trump supporters there. I wound up talking with one of them. Some dude overheard our conversation, goes by and says “Nazis”.

    Definitely the result of gaslighting by the media.

    Liked by 3 people

  24. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Farm Boy says:

    Voters aren’t convinced that more women political leaders are the way to go, perhaps in part because most think men and women have more common interests than not.

    http://m.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/politics/general_politics/september_2019/most_don_t_see_more_women_leaders_as_better_for_society

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Farm Boy says:

    Words of wisdom from Xi the Pooh

    1. “You can’t stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes.”

    2. “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”

    3. “Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.”

    4. “Some people talk to animals. Not many listen though. That’s the problem.”

    5. “- What day is it?” ” – It’s today,” squeaked Piglet. “- My favorite day,” said Pooh.

    6. “You’re braver than you believe and stronger and smarter than you think.”

    7. “Love is taking a few steps backward maybe even more… to give way to the happiness of the person you love.”

    8. “A little consideration, a little thought for others, makes all the difference.”

    9. “Don’t underestimate the value of doing nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering.”

    10. “If there ever comes a day we can’t be together, keep me in your heart, I’ll stay there forever.”

    11. “The things that make me different are the things that make me.”

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Liz says:

    After NBA executive Daryl Morey tweeted his support for protesters in Hong Kong, he was quickly bombarded by angry replies before he deleted the message.
    Some social media users replied with “NMSL” — Chinese Internet slang that means “your mother is dead”

    Very nice people, these folks we’ve kept in our most favored nation status circle.

    Liked by 2 people

  28. Liz says:

    most favored nation trade status, should’ve been.

    Like

  29. Farm Boy says:

    President Trump’s senior adviser Stephen Miller says 2020 Democrat presidential primary candidates are willing to “sacrifice the working class” of the United States to help illegal aliens

    https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2019/10/07/exclusive-stephen-miller-2020-democrats-want-to-sacrifice-the-working-class-for-illegal-aliens/

    Liked by 1 person

  30. Farm Boy says:

    Among the nations that could veto another delay is Hungary. Its president, Victor Orbán — like Trump and Johnson — is not a globalist. He is regularly accused of destroying Hungary’s democracy and performing as a near-dictator. Within the EU, Orbán and his nation are facing political isolation.

    https://spectator.org/boris-brexit-or-bust/

    Like

  31. Farm Boy says:

    “I think that Crooked Hillary Clinton should enter the race to try and steal it away from Uber Left Elizabeth Warren. Only one condition. The Crooked one must explain all of her high crimes and misdemeanors including how & why she deleted 33,000 Emails AFTER getting ‘C’ Subpoena!” Trump wrote Tuesday on Twitter

    https://www.dailywire.com/news/trump-urges-hillary-to-enter-presidential-race

    Like

  32. Liz says:

    Does Fuzzy have some sort of tic disorder?
    Because the continuous posting of those videos have now gone beyond just basic social ineptness.

    Like

  33. Cheque d'Out says:

    Should be an interesting and entertaining show, have just started myself

    Like

  34. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 1 person

  35. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 2 people

  36. Cheque d'Out says:

    I haven’t seen the videos but I don’t think that Fuzzy has been in a good place for many years. I think that he gets some comfort from blogs. Perhaps not enough any more. And that’s a shame as I’m sure that he didn’t deserve to end up in this dark place.

    Liked by 3 people

  37. Liz says:

    Videos are at Bloom’s. It’s truly starting to drive me nuts.
    I hesitate to check out her site anymore. I know I should just ignore, but after a while it’s like….What. the. everliving. F**

    Like

  38. Liz says:

    Heh, Spawny. I don’t remember him being this way before.
    Candidly, one of our sons has tourette’s (mild version), so I’m not making fun when I ask about the tics, I’m truly curious.

    Liked by 1 person

  39. Cheque d'Out says:

    I haven’t seen the videos and I’m up to my neck at the moment, so I won’t.

    Like

  40. Liz says:

    It’s been going on for months.

    Like

  41. Bevin : KY :: Trump : US. Not really what we wanted, but a hell of a lot better than the alternative.

    Liked by 1 person

  42. My sons are what keep me (mostly, eh) sane. I would not be in a good place without them to keep me grounded. Having worked Inpatient Psych, sorry, I mean Behavioral Health, I know I’m lucky.

    Liked by 2 people

  43. Gaslighting is a term I rarely heard before but its definetly going more mainstream. I have experienced it myself and it can be hard to detect, usually because its a frog in the pot situation, I think… the warming is gradual enough that while something “doesnt feel right” its not sudden and drastic enough to make you hop. I have learned to watch for the warning signs and see it much more easily now. Gaslighting never goes anywhere good, I do know that!

    I worry about Fuzzie too, he seems to be a kind soul who has gotten stuck in the mire. I hope he will cross the mire and get to a place where he sees both the light and the dark, not niavely just light or nhilistically just dark.

    I get what you mean Liz, about comments in general not just Fuzzie, I even avoid reading them now myself bc of that — too much of a downer sometimes.

    Not sure what the fix is, if there is one?

    Liked by 3 people

  44. Does Northern Ireland area strongly oppose Brexit or what is the reasoning? I am trying to understand the relationship between the parts of the UK so forgive my America-centric worldview and lack of knowledge about world history here, but would it be similar to a region in the US wanting to go its own way and no longer be part of the U.S.? Are Ireland and England and Scotlad seen as individual nations, or as the equivelant of states wi the U.S. (I really need go get out more!)

    Wishing for a safe and peaceful and successful conclusion for those across the pond!

    Liked by 2 people

  45. Liz says:

    My boys keep me sane too! They’re awesome and very accomplished…I hope I didn’t imply differently, if so I expressed myself badly. The reason I brought it up…one son has had “tics’ of one sort or another all his life. They’re generally mild, but they’ve changed through the years. Once we understood what was going on it was easier to understand the behavior. In bear’s case, he seems sincere…so at this point I’m going to guess there’s some compulsion here.
    At any rate, ’nuff said.

    Liked by 3 people

  46. BuenaVista says:

    “Gaslighting”, to me, is far more insidious than what the OP describes.

    Propagation of an ineffectual ideology is bad, of course. Feminism makes men and women sad and mad. Okay, fine. Propagation of an ineffectual ideology — while simultaneously shaming and isolating (socially and emotionally) a person or persons for attempting to resist the manipulation — creates a broken personality. I think the difference in my perspective is the element of destroying — by any means — an intuitive, organic resistence to the lies and the punishment that the gaslighting enables. There is always the most grievous punishment on offer to the gaslighting recipient. It’s “agree with us or die.”

    Imagine a child who is routinely abused emotionally and physically. Commonplace, right? Now imagine what happens to the child’s mind when the only adults he knows tell him/her his parents are saints and selfless. To me this is gaslighting. What is black is white, what is bad is good. Self-obliteration, or perhaps the obliteration of the gaslighter, are the only ways out. The gaslighter may wish for his victim to suicide out. That may be the perp’s projection, but it is real.

    Joker was raised by a delusional, self-justifying monster who beat him, chained him, starved him (Phoenix must have lost 75 lbs for that role) and told him she loved him and by golly he loved her or else. She lies about his very origin — on two levels. (I’m trying not to spoil the movie.) So in middle age Joker still worships her, bathes her, soothes her. She has successfully gaslighted him. He wants to die. Everything that is bad he now requires himself to believe is good, but none of it is; it doesn’t add up. As he notes, he has never passed a single day in his life when he was happy. But his choices were to honor his mother and the house of lying cards she constructed for the two of them, or reject every element of what he was trained to believe.

    Almost by accident, Joker severs his chains (which he loves, as they are all he has known), transcends his gaslighting. This is unfortunate for many other people, who preferred him drugged, ill and groveling. (They dead.) He no longer wishes himself dead. He wishes to claim his humanity at the expense of those who have denied his. This is a problem for Gotham.

    ***

    tldr: Gaslighting is more than manipulation. It’s the subversion of individual sovereignty, personality and thinking to sustain the perverse convictions of others. Gaslighting is meant to explode another person’s core humanity. It often does.

    Liked by 3 people

  47. BuenaVista says:

    The Fuzzie has rejected online suggestions that would help him. I know at least one of our number has tried to help him offline, a gesture that is extremely generous. He was also rejected. I’m surprised the girls didn’t notice this behavior years ago. Everybody else did.

    Liked by 3 people

  48. His Greta Thunberg is the best Greta Thunberg.

    [But do Yoda he can?]

    Liked by 2 people

  49. “Looking at me, you might not think it, but I actually do a really great Michael Jackson impersonation. Would you like to see it? Okay, now I’ll just need a very young volunteer who can keep a secret.”

    Liked by 2 people

  50. Farm Boy says:

    To show what their version of democracy looks like, this scuzzy bunch of mostly female agitators took to the streets around the Supreme Court building. They blocked traffic and created a mess before marching off to Senator Mitch McConnell’s home.

    Watch as D.C. police do nothing while the mob trespasses on private property and vandalizes the U.S. Senate majority leader’s front door with yellow tape

    https://www.americanthinker.com/blog/2019/10/an_ugly_horde_of_female_protesters_target_judge_kavanaugh_and_senator_mitch_mcconnell_again.html

    Like

  51. Farm Boy says:

    For me this is part of re-weaving a human family back together again. It’s part of dealing with systemic racism, white supremacy and the wounds of patriarchy

    https://www.weaselzippers.us/434701-climate-change-moonbat-fixing-the-climate-addresses-systemic-racism-white-supremacy-and-the-wounds-of-patriarchy/

    Like

  52. Farm Boy says:

    We will never know the motivation

    Like

  53. Ame says:

    BV – Imagine a child who is routinely abused emotionally and physically. Commonplace, right? Now imagine what happens to the child’s mind when the only adults he knows tell him/her his parents are saints and selfless. To me this is gaslighting. What is black is white, what is bad is good. Self-obliteration, or perhaps the obliteration of the gaslighter, are the only ways out. The gaslighter may wish for his victim to suicide out. That may be the perp’s projection, but it is real.

    tldr: Gaslighting is more than manipulation. It’s the subversion of individual sovereignty, personality and thinking to sustain the perverse convictions of others. Gaslighting is meant to explode another person’s core humanity. It often does.

    a crazy week … haven’t had time to read everything, but, by golly, i was going to sit down tonight and read what i could … and then, once again, BV’s brilliant talent with the written word leaps from my screen.

    as mentioned over time, we haven’t been in church in many years … 9, 10, something. finding one that is solid biblicaly (and the pastor doesn’t do weird things like hug you to death) is like the proverbial needle in a haystack. but … i found this itty bitty church quite accidentally, and Oldest and i have been attending the last 4 weeks. if a church could be a ‘unicorn,’ this one is pretty darn close.

    anyway, the pastor who preached sunday (they have 4 who rotate) was in daniel 3 and talked about rulers, or people in authority, who use that to manipulate others (very simplified version of what he said). my daughter and i kept looking at each other as he made points because he exactly described my ex-in-laws, her dad’s parents.

    and what BV has written here also exactly describes his parents and the home he grew up in, including, “Now imagine what happens to the child’s mind when the only adults he knows tell him/her his parents are saints and selfless.” and … what they did was truly “more than manipulation. It’s the subversion of individual sovereignty, personality and thinking to sustain the perverse convictions of others.”

    a little example … in high school he rearranged the furniture in his bedroom so he could have better light to study. when he came home from school the next day, it was moved back. never a word was said. it wasn’t allowed.

    and that’s why his dad came to hate me so much … b/c i didn’t bow to him. b/c i stood up to him even when his son could not. b/c i told the truth to him and to his son (and to his wife) … and that, he could not tolerate. so he created a texas-sized wedge in our marriage and kept hammering it in deeper and deeper.

    his hate for me rivals anti-trumpers if not surpasses them. it infuses every molecule in his body and every thought in his brain. it consumes him. they have literally spent endless hours going over every.single.detail of every.single.thing i’ve ever done and said … and i mean days, weeks, months, kind-of-hours.

    “Self-obliteration, or perhaps the obliteration of the gaslighter, are the only ways out. The gaslighter may wish for his victim to suicide out. That may be the perp’s projection, but it is real.”

    since he could not face and deal with these truths of his own father, self-obliteration truly was his only way out … unfortunately, though, not till after he did his darndest to pass onto myself and our children what his dad so ‘generously’ shared with him.

    i do know how hard it is to break those cycles b/c i did it, but he did not/could not. it was his choice.

    anyway … wow … BV nailed it. i could never have written it was well as he.

    i will stand by BV’s recommendation not to see Joker … it would traumatize me for months.

    Liked by 2 people

  54. Ame says:

    on a happier note … Oldest and i were running errands and in a shopping area where there was a little store tucked in between many others. it sold ‘homemade’ things which spiked my interest, so we went inside. turns out they are part of a group that helps people with mental and physical handicaps to make things with their hands, and then they sell the items for them in this little store. Oldest and i were so touched with their story we purchased a few things.

    Liked by 1 person

  55. Ame says:

    i think Fuzzie has allowed himself to fill his mind with negative things so much so that they have consumed every fiber of his being. how he got to that place, idk. getting out would be harsh b/c no one makes a change like that unless living the way they are is more painful than making the change.

    it’s very sad to me, and tragic, that he cannot/will not, make that choice to change. it must be a very dark way to live 😦

    Liked by 3 people

  56. Farm Boy says:

    You know why I don’t like the media? They are all about tabloid these days.

    Here’s the rumour they’ve been sitting on.

    Allegedly, @JustinTrudeau slept with a 17 year old when he was a teacher.

    That’s the big scoop, apparently.

    Do with this as you will.

    — James DiFiore (@jamesdifiore) October 4, 2019

    [Wonder if boy or girl it was I do]

    Like

  57. Farm Boy says:

    “After much deliberation, consultation, and prayer to Moloch, I have decided that I will seek a second term,” she said to a crowd gathered at a local Wendy’s restaurant. “I feel I haven’t accomplished everything I wanted to in my first term, and I really need a full eight years to implement my final solution to all of America’s problems.”

    Aides then gently ushered her back onto the bus to take her back to Bright Sunrise Home For Seniors.

    https://babylonbee.com/news/hilary-clinton-announces-she-will-seek-re-election-as-president-of-the-united-states

    Liked by 2 people

  58. Farm Boy says:

    After some consideration, one might think that the EU’s behavior toward the U.K. would be a justification for war

    Liked by 2 people

  59. Stephanie says:

    On gaslighting… my husband’s parents gaslit him… I got a taste of it when they sent us a **nine page letter** claiming everything was our fault, that we had psychological problems, and that their son was a liar. It was in response to us just requesting to go over some boundaries and fix issues where we felt they weren’t respecting us as people/parents. Apparently we weren’t allowed to voice our opinion at all. This was years ago, but I’ll never forget how weird it was receiving that letter that was so long. The creepiest part to me was how much they denied things that had happened.

    But my husband wasn’t surprised at all. That’s how they were his entire childhood.

    He’s nothing like that though, he’s such a strong father and leader, our boys love him and can talk to him about anything without fear of him. He’s definitely broken the cycle.

    Liked by 5 people

  60. Stephanie says:

    On that police family where the husband was hit… the surgery went really well, amputation is probably still in the cards, but he’s already scheduled for a 4th surgery (in less than a week) and they’re doing their best to save everything they can before having to amputate. He’s in one of the best military trauma hospital centers we have, with doctors renowned for what they’re doing, it was very encouraging to see him and talk to him about it all.

    And it’s soooo nice to get to support their family and be there emotionally for his wife. She’s still in some weird state of shock I’ve never seen before (and I’ve been to a lot of these where the officer gets hit by drunk driver etc.). But they were high school sweet hearts, married super young… maybe the bond is just a lot stronger between them. Even my mom (who came with me for MY emotional support lol) remarked on how sweet and in love they were.

    He’s so stoic, I’m constantly reminded that these men are like warriors. We were there, talking and listening to the wife about all that’s gone on, and when they ask him pain level he casually said it was up to a 7 (!!!!). That’s a very high pain amount in my opinion, but he was carrying on and acting like it was nothing!!!

    We also found out that he probably saved his life with his fast reflexes. He was able to see the wreck that was about to happen, and he jumped over a guard-rail and that single action probably protected him from having all kinds of organ damage and possible death.

    Anyway… it was really good, but also hard emotionally. I held it together when we were with them for the afternoon, but as soon as we left, I was crying my eyes out.

    Liked by 4 people

  61. Farm Boy says:

    Liz on Easter Sunday

    Liked by 2 people

  62. Yes so true BV, its not just tge water getting gradually warmer, its also tge insistsnce you are crazy or broken or to blame for even thinking it that’s so insidious. Well that and the punishment for your thinking/mentioning it.

    (insert “how dare you!!!” greta gif here!)

    [SG – Happy to oblige]

    Liked by 3 people

  63. Not to mention the casual yet heartless discard followed by a very effective and totally fabricated public smear campaign if punishment does not get you in step w/ thanking them for the ever hotter water and supplication that no matter how hot it gets they are right and you are wrong, always (and even that may not be enough, or it will, randomly and without rhyme or reason, but just enough to keep one hanging on to hoping “the good old days” of love bombing will return rather than recognizing they won’t and never were what they seemed.

    Yeah… sucky stuff, all that…

    Often served up young and often, learned helplessness is the goal, a pattern that others who follow later can milk well.

    The “lucky” somehow jump from the electrified floor to the not electrified side no matter how hopeless it seems rather than lay down and accept the suffering.

    But the trauma remains. Never not there. Hard to understand unless one has been there, done that, got the participation trophy.

    Still, the past no matter how bad, need not be the now or future. Sadly many never see this…

    Ok that was heavy. (Plates flying, stuff smashing, maybe a vodoo doll, then forgiveness of self and others not bc they deserve it but bc you do.)

    Ahem… Cookies anyone? Bar cart?

    please forgive the typos, as always! Small phone syndrome…

    Liked by 2 people

  64. RichardP says:

    @Ame said: i think Fuzzie has allowed himself to fill his mind with negative things so much so that they have consumed every fiber of his being.

    Fuzzie contributes quite regularly to a different blog. He speaks with a totally different voice there, and does not seem to be consumed with negative things. Different voices for different audiences perhaps.

    https://davidcollard.wordpress.com/

    In an much earlier conversation at Bloom’s place, I related that I had just found out about a friend of a friend – whose wife went into some sort of seizure on their wedding night, they went to the hospital, and she was diagnosed with something like multiple sclerosis (don’t remember exactly). She went downhill fairly rapidly and not too long after was confined to a wheelchair. Yet some years later, she was still alive, and in a wheel chair in much poorer health, and they were still married.

    Now we have Stephanie’s friends that are going through their own version of what I was pointing out with my story long ago. Tomorrow is promised to no one. In the space of a heartbeat, what was changes into what will be for the rest of our lives. My friend’s friend, on his wedding night, lost the wife he thought he was going to have forever. Stephanie’s friend will no longer have the husband she was counting on having for the rest of her life. None of us knows when or if this will happen to us. Yet, if we are not going to just give up and quit, we have to figure out how to create something useful out of the rest of our lives.

    That is why I think it is not useful to adopt the attitude that some in the manosphere seem to have (exhibited mostly elsewhere and not here): this is the way God says relationships are supposed to work, and we don’t dare deviate from that a whit.

    Well, sometimes we have to – as shown by my story and now Stephanie’s story, and the story that has been the subtext to Ame’s and Bloom’s stories all along. We don’t get to control what is handed to us. But it is our responsibility to make something useful out of it as best we can. Just as Adam did with Eve, outside of the Garden. And that is why I make reference to the Adam and Eve story outside of the Garden. Because it is so reflective of what many of us are required to do in our own lives. Whether Adam and Eve actually existed, or whether it was created as a myth at some point to convey this truth about the human condition – it does give us an example that, more often than not, all of us have to create something useful with our lives outside of the Garden – with nothing more than what we’ve been given.

    I think about the life that my friend’s friend created with the love of his life unexpectedly in a wheelchair almost from the moment he married her. I think about the life that Ame has created for herself and her daughters these last dozen years or so. And the life that Bloom has created for her and her daughters. (And all the others, whose lives appear normal, but we know that everyone has struggles to overcome.) And I am amazed at the resilience of the human spirit and amazed at what they’ve created with their lives outside of the Garden.

    And I listen to those who say about relationships the Bible says you go from Point A to Point Z, and don’t deviate a whit – because that’s what the Bible says, and I just shake my head, and think: Just wait. You too may learn some day that tomorrow is promised to no one. Then what?

    Liked by 3 people

  65. b g says:

    Stephanie

    I know it sucks, my wife showed up from losing her Dad, and came home and bursted into tears because there were not enough shoulders at the funeral because too many of her sisters were divorced. We had seen many hard losses but because we had three brothers, women could find the necessary hug.

    Liked by 2 people

  66. Cheque d'Out says:

    Peerless Moron has a good day when interviewing an XR (Extinction Rebellion) Mong

    Liked by 1 person

  67. Cheque d'Out says:


    Inspired by brave, heroic extinction rebellion mongs were photod queuing for a McDonald’s Crappy Meal

    [Good to see Moe it is ]

    Liked by 3 people

  68. Cill says:

    “please forgive the typos, as always!”

    I too have wide forefingers.

    Liked by 2 people

  69. Cill says:

    It is not necessarily true, I hasten to add, that all battlers have wide forefingers. Nor is it true that wide forefingers bear sole responsibility for typos . Sometimes long eyesight is to blame for the shot hitting more than one tarfget targhet target.

    Liked by 5 people

  70. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 2 people

  71. Cheque d'Out says:

    oftern spolling cornmection cann svae teh dai th0

    Liked by 2 people

  72. Cheque d'Out says:

    Not seen such divided reviews of a film by reviewers that I place value on before.

    Kermode said it added to the Joker mythos.
    RedLetterMedia were pretty downbeat
    Critical Drinker loved it

    Paul Joseph Watson

    Liked by 3 people

  73. Cill says:

    I’m not sure if I’ll see Joker.

    I’m not much of a movie goer. My usual reason for going to movies is to get some sleep. Put on the old earmuffs to dull the roar of the speakers (they are always far too loud for a bloke from the wop-wops) and the movie puts me to sleep. The other place I get a good snooze is when having my hair cut. The closest barber is pretty good at it. She’s a prostitute I know – well not exactly “know” in that sense of the word – and not a bad sheila as sheilas go. But that’s another story.

    Liked by 3 people

  74. Farm Boy says:

    Actually, the Red Letter Media guys kinda sorta liked Joker

    Like

  75. Cheque d'Out says:

    Perhaps I should have said RLM were low energy. As usual it was just on in the background but I didn’t finish the review thinking that it’s something to rush to see.

    Like

  76. Cill says:

    Talking about sleep, it’s past midnight here.
    12:14 am Thursday 10th October.
    Time to get some kip, or try to at least. I might have a shot at commenting on the OP after daybreak. Goodnight.

    Liked by 3 people

  77. “You can’t spell unethical without U.N.” I cracked a smile.

    Non-binding resolutions and tomorrow’s corruption today also scored highly.

    Liked by 3 people

  78. It would be great is 1917 turned out to be a good movie as my older boy is really into The Great War era, but the trailer doesn’t inspire a lot of confidence in me. Looks like it got the Michael Bay treatment.

    These days, anytime I see Bandersnatch Cummerbund I feel queasy.

    Liked by 1 person

  79. Liz says:

    Wow, that was quite a review by Paul Joseph Watson (streaming worked fine for a change…maybe streaming is better up here early in the morning, or maybe the new month for data just kicked in). Interesting the difference between Joker’s critic reviews and audience reviews (and Chappelle show, also cited).

    On Richard’s subject: One of the football fathers on the high school team here has MS. He is in a wheelchair. A couple of weeks back Mike and I sat with him at a pre-game dinner and found out his story. He was a Marine, and after that a cop who worked with K9s. He said one day he was doing a routine training exercise with the dog, and the dog didn’t respond as he normally did…apparently these dogs are so tuned in to their masters, they can sense when something is “off”. After that, he knew he couldn’t do the job and it was only a matter of time before he lost the ability to walk. He’s in a wheelchair now. I can’t imagine what is would be like to be so disciplined and lose control over your own body. I’d really like to help this family, but I’m not sure how. Fortunately, the VA has helped him a lot (it’s kind of a cliche the VA sucks, but it has improved a great deal in the past ten years or so, I don’t criticize the VA they do a lot with what they have). He has his sons who play on the football team, and I’m sure that is a blessing for him. His wife did say, “everything happens for a reason”. I believe this too, but it’s easier for me to accept since life has given me (metaphorical) rainbows and ponies. They seem incredibly grateful in spite of everything.
    It’s true, one never knows what a day may bring. I try to be grateful for every day.

    Liked by 2 people

  80. Liz says:

    Looks like it got the Michael Bay treatment.

    I didn’t see any busty, “gutsy” women with big hair, so not quite. 😆

    Liked by 1 person

  81. Liz says:

    Think I mentioned before my grandfather was in WWI, and got meningitis. It stuck the whole platoon, and he was the only one who lived. They were trying to figure out what he’d done differently and he mentioned he was so hungry he’d eaten some moldy bread (blue green bread mold is penicillin). So I owe my life to bread mold.

    Liked by 3 people

  82. The Paul Joseph Watson video is worth a look. Thanks, CdO.

    Liked by 3 people

  83. Cheque d'Out says:

    Cheers yourself, mate.

    Like

  84. Cheque d'Out says:

    Had to stop watching the 1917 trailer as it seemed to be giving away all the key plot points.
    I’ll be watching it at some point though.

    Liked by 1 person

  85. I think of the Michael Bay treatment as being, “Blammo!, “It’s coming right at us!!” and “KA-BOOM!!!”. I’m fine with busty (but not comically so) women, as I think I’ve made quite clear on several occasions.

    Gutsy, I can do without.

    [Like Boobs I do]

    Liked by 3 people

  86. BuenaVista says:

    I never watch videos on the intertoobs (unless they are sequences of pancake blocks by Iowans) but KHH’s Comedy Whatever 20 minute performance is much, much appreciated.

    Like

  87. Liz says:

    KHH, Yeah I agree on Michael Bay. We call him Moto (master of the obvious).

    Liked by 1 person

  88. Here’s a screen cap from the PJW video, although he attributes the text to another person.

    I concur.

    The Zman wrote something along similar lines recently:

    http://thezman.com/wordpress/?p=18821

    For libertarians and market absolutists, any restraint on how you can dispose of your property or how you trade property with others is seen as a violation of your individual sovereignty. Inevitably, it means taking the side of the market when it bumps up against custom or tradition. It means siding with novelty that promises more market freedom, even when it undermines the organic institutions of society. Inevitably, conservatives became the defenders of the wrecking ball that destroyed American culture.

    It’s why a Kevin Williamson could gleefully cheer for the destruction of small-town America and their customs, in the name of the free market. From his perspective, the limitations of localism are a gross violation of freedom, so destroying those local communities sets the residents free to maximize their economic utility. Buckley conservatism has drifted so far from its alleged starting position, it now stands in opposition to that which defined its alleged starting position.

    This recent piece by David French is another example. In it, he turns conservatism on its head in order to promote marketism. The problems of college athletics, however you wish to frame them, are not the result of too little commercialism. Only a blithering idiot could come to such a conclusion. The trouble with college sports, and the college system as a whole, is it is now almost entirely free of the system of customs and traditions that created it. Higher education is a market that strives to be a racket.

    Liked by 2 people

  89. BuenaVista says:

    Thank you, Ame. Agree: Probably shouldn’t see the movie: The anxiety it produces if you understand what’s going on is hard to describe. The director doesn’t allude to it as do most movies in a 90 second scene; it lasts for the first 90 minutes.

    Liked by 2 people

  90. BuenaVista says:

    I read somewhere that 1917 is one of 3-4 movies that attempts a continuous camera — I don’t know the technical term — one of which was a Hitchcock. The idea is that the protagonists every moment is streamed continuously.

    Liked by 1 person

  91. CdO linked the the Franken video and I was just riding his coat tails.

    Apparently Franken is an (Midwestern) American now living in England.

    Liked by 3 people

  92. Oh yeah, ^^^^ video is extremely NSFW, btw.

    Like

  93. Cheque d'Out says:

    A summary of yesterday’s hullabaloo

    Liked by 1 person

  94. Liz says:

    Don’t know if anyone watches Peaky Blinders. Just started their 5th season. It’s very well done, IMO. Can’t say it’s uplifting (and usually shows like this are too “dark” for me, but I like this one for some reason).

    Like

  95. BuenaVista says:

    Kindness and respect (if not love) as essential to community: Community is the only solution for those who are ill (MS or schizophrenia, matters not); instead we quarantine them.

    Anyway:

    That was from a Chris Arnade thread. Arnade is an ex-hedge fund manager, now very wealthy, who travels about the country to its unpopular corners and talks to people in McDonalds and such, while photographing the deplorables and despicables, as HRC and Booker describe them (us). I strongly recommend Chris Arnade.

    Liked by 2 people

  96. BuenaVista says:

    [What Arnade means by “Front Row” v. “Back Row”:

    The Front Row kids in school who raise their hand desperate to be chosen by the teacher, who does choose them. Back Row kids already believe in their social and economic irrelevance.

    Liked by 3 people

  97. Farm Boy says:

    So maybe there does need to be a rematch. Obviously, I can beat him again

    https://pjmedia.com/trending/hillary-clinton-obviously-i-can-beat-him-again/

    Like

  98. Farm Boy says:

    Oberlin College hires high-powered D.C. lawyers to appeal Gibson’s Bakery verdict

    Board of Trustees Chair: “Left standing, the verdict could … set a troubling precedent for those institutions, like Oberlin, that are committed to respecting free speech”

    https://legalinsurrection.com/2019/10/oberlin-college-hires-high-powered-d-c-lawyers-to-appeal-gibsons-bakery-verdict/

    [Committed to respecting free speech they are not]

    Liked by 4 people

  99. Farm Boy says:

    Dick’s CEO Says Anti-Gun Policy Shrank Company by a ‘Quarter Billion Dollars’

    https://freebeacon.com/issues/dicks-ceo-says-anti-gun-policy-shrank-company-by-a-quarter-billion-dollars/

    Liked by 1 person

  100. Short, but I think the part about business activism is on the money.

    Liked by 4 people

  101. Dick’s CEO Says Anti-Gun Policy Shrank Company by a ‘Quarter Billion Dollars’

    Well, that’s a good start. Let’s go for a cool billion by this time next year.

    Liked by 3 people

  102. Liz says:

    The only reason Dick’s hasn’t lost more market share is, Sports Authority went out of business…and there aren’t too many small sports retail stores I can buy from (because the large chains like Sports Authority and Dicks drove them out of business). When I need size 14 wide football cleats, my options are kinda limited. 😆

    Side note: If leftists were truly interested in diversity, they would support Trump. He’s the most diverse candidate we’ve seen in a long while.

    Liked by 3 people

  103. Ame says:

    i know i’ve said it before, but i just love y’all out here 🙂

    i think Joker is a powerful movie given what’s been shared, just not one i can watch.

    Bloom is so right about the frog in the water thing. you think that stuff can’t/won’t happen to you, then, one day, you find yourself curled in a ball at the bottom of the stairs, holding onto fragments of what you hope are life after he’s been berating you for who knows how long for who knows what, and all you know is that you’re in trouble, again, even though you cannot figure out what you did this time and don’t know how to prevent the next time that you know is coming, when he finally wears himself out and climbs the stairs to get away from the disgust he sees curled in a ball, looking over his shoulder and adding on as he climbs, “But you know I love you, right?”

    truly … by the grace of God, alone, am i sane today.

    and even more importantly … by the power and grace of God, alone … i was able to protect our daughters from most of it and shield them from his parents (i call it being the Storm Wall protecting them from his parents – battered and beaten by the storms, but still standing 🙂 ).

    and then, at his funeral, his dad and brother both gave the greater portion of his eulogy, and the words they spoke about their own son/brother were so extremely passive-aggressively mean and cruel it was, shocking, even to me. and they stood in front of a packed church, pointing their fingers at my daughters, and almost screaming at them. i had the foresight to know they would need one-on-one attention and had my sister protecting Aspie-Girl while i protected Oldest. the funeral director went against his father’s wishes and kept me with my daughters at the graveside … much to her detriment because he came back after the funeral and berated her non-stop to tears. i had called her for something, and while privacy laws prohibited her from telling me exactly what happened, she did say to me, in tears, (about a man who devoted his whole life and career to full-time pastoral ministry), “People like him are the reason I will not believe in God.”

    and … *his* story is he had a cruel mother who literally pounded the bible while pounding him while his kind, hard-working, gentle father worked the fields. and so the insanity continued . . . until they met me. and i have refused to let it continue. absolutely refused. by the grace and strength of God i have sheltered my daughters from their infinite crazy and mental instability and insanity … and the blessing is that my girls now know and almost daily sing my praises. my life is devoted to protecting them and stopping the insanity, and all thanks to God, i have.

    Liked by 1 person

  104. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 1 person

  105. Cheque d'Out says:

    [Warning you should have given]

    Liked by 1 person

  106. Ame says:

    BV – i read your comment on gaslighting to my Oldest, and she related to every bit of it. you have a gifted ability with words.

    Liked by 1 person

  107. Ame says:

    as i continue to absorb all of this, i think the reason BV’s comments are so profound for me is that it’s very hard to root out all those lies that were deeply and intentionally embedded into my soul. when i read truth like this, it’s confirmation of what was … that it’s not ‘all in my mind’ as my mother often said of anything she didn’t want to deal with … that they really were/are bad people who did (still do) really bad things … and that all the choices and sacrifices i made to ensure it wasn’t passed down to my girls was worth it, regardless of the cost.

    Liked by 1 person

  108. Ame says:

    Richard –
    That is why I think it is not useful to adopt the attitude that some in the manosphere seem to have (exhibited mostly elsewhere and not here): this is the way God says relationships are supposed to work, and we don’t dare deviate from that a whit.

    Well, sometimes we have to – as shown by my story and now Stephanie’s story, and the story that has been the subtext to Ame’s and Bloom’s stories all along. We don’t get to control what is handed to us. But it is our responsibility to make something useful out of it as best we can. Just as Adam did with Eve, outside of the Garden. And that is why I make reference to the Adam and Eve story outside of the Garden. Because it is so reflective of what many of us are required to do in our own lives. Whether Adam and Eve actually existed, or whether it was created as a myth at some point to convey this truth about the human condition – it does give us an example that, more often than not, all of us have to create something useful with our lives outside of the Garden – with nothing more than what we’ve been given.

    I think about the life that my friend’s friend created with the love of his life unexpectedly in a wheelchair almost from the moment he married her. I think about the life that Ame has created for herself and her daughters these last dozen years or so. And the life that Bloom has created for her and her daughters. (And all the others, whose lives appear normal, but we know that everyone has struggles to overcome.) And I am amazed at the resilience of the human spirit and amazed at what they’ve created with their lives outside of the Garden.

    And I listen to those who say about relationships the Bible says you go from Point A to Point Z, and don’t deviate a whit – because that’s what the Bible says, and I just shake my head, and think: Just wait. You too may learn some day that tomorrow is promised to no one. Then what?

    – – –

    thank you 🙂

    Like

  109. RichardP says:

    Ame – you are welcome.

    Ultimately, folks can’t be anything more than who they are (short version). And who they are is oftened determined by things over which they had no control while they were developing (cue the Joker story; cue your first husband’s story). Unfortunately, when who they are is someone who consistently slices your heart to pieces, it is hard to remember that.

    Liked by 1 person

  110. Farm Boy says:

    Farrow’s reporting suggests that Clinton — hailed as a champion of women — pressured Ronan Farrow to drop his story on one of the most notorious offenders whose story launched the #MeToo movement against sexual assault.

    https://pjmedia.com/trending/bombshell-hillarys-publicist-pressured-ronan-farrow-to-drop-harvey-weinstein-story/

    Like

  111. Farm Boy says:

    So it turns out that the acting director of the Interior Department’s Bureau of Land Management, William Perry Pendley, has denied the Left’s “climate change” mythology, and opposes jihad violence and illegal immigration. CNN’s Andrew Kaczynski is out for blood, trying to get Pendley for heresy, that is, for his dissent from Leftist orthodoxy.

    https://pjmedia.com/news-and-politics/cnn-tries-to-get-interior-department-official-fired-for-opposing-jihad-violence/

    Like

  112. Farm Boy says:

    YouTuber Trisha Paytas announces she is a ‘transgender gay man’ but says she will continue to live as a woman – her ‘natural born gender’ – prompting fury from critics who say she ‘exploiting the LGBTQ community for clickbait’
    Trisha, 31, from California, announced online that she is transgender

    Celebrity Big Brother star said she is ‘female to male’ but feels like a ‘gay man’

    Made announcement after wearing her hair short and dressing in casual clothing

    Said she is ‘transgender’ but still identifies as her ‘natural born gender’

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-7549595/YouTuber-Trisha-Paytas-slammed-announcing-transgender.html

    Like

  113. Farm Boy says:

    Tom Cotton to IC IG: Your Evasiveness On Whether You Backdated Changes to the Whistleblower Process Borders on Criminal Obstruction

    They changed the reporting requirements, then back-dated them by a month to make them seem like they’d been in force… well, for all of a month. But I guess that looks better than having them changed on the day of the fake “whistleblower’s” Schiffty complaint.

    http://ace.mu.nu/archives/383678.php

    Like

  114. Farm Boy says:

    All this proves is that women are bigger suckers than men. Even more so if you compare what degrees the two sexes major in. Women do more master’s degrees because they’re psychologically better off staying in college and racking up even more debt rather than confronting the real world fact that their degree is worthless and they are chronically unsuited to the world of work.

    But hypergamey tells us that women want to trade up, and thus they cannot condone having a partner of a lower socio-economic status than them

    https://pushingrubberdownhill.com/2019/10/08/no-man-no-plan-no-van/

    Like

  115. Ame says:

    RichardP

    Ultimately, folks can’t be anything more than who they are (short version). And who they are is oftened determined by things over which they had no control while they were developing (cue the Joker story; cue your first husband’s story). Unfortunately, when who they are is someone who consistently slices your heart to pieces, it is hard to remember that.

    i’m not sure i fully agree, Richard. i think we have to accept a lot of things … but we don’t have to accept that we cannot change … face our reality/truth, accept it, learn from it, move forward, make different/better choices than those imposed upon us.

    my first Husband had THE best resources available to him to help him to do just that, but he ultimately refused it all, calling it all bs, and refused to face his own reality/truth. his dad raised him to believe his dad was just barely lower than God … like not even any light between them. facing the reality/truth that his dad lied to him all his life, that his dad was cruel, that the one man whose approval he craved would never give it no matter how much he bended to his desires … he refused to face that. he went to the same therapist, and the therapist told me that all my husband wanted to talk about was how terrible i was. he refused to talk about himself or his parents or anything except how bad i was. that befuddles me b/c therapy, for me, was about me (the one time in my life when something was all about me! lol!) and that therapist worked my butt off for 2.5 years.

    my husband had the same opportunity. he had an amazing support group of people who encouraged him. he had everything but the one thing he craved – his dad.

    but, you know, i’ve not had my parents, either. i’ve recently reconnected with my dad, but there are still places we do not enter. i seriously doubt i’ll have anything with my mom, and if i do it will be all about her as it’s always been.

    we all get to choose. sure, sh*! happens. and sometimes lots and lots of sh*! happens to us. but we still get to choose what we’re gonna do from here on out.

    one time in therapy i was defending my parents, sharing how they were abused, too. and my therapist stopped me, looked me in the eyes, and said, “Ame, you were abused, but you do not abuse your children. It was their choice. They had a choice.”

    there are lots of things we cannot choose in this world, but there are lots we can … we can choose our attitude, we can choose our perspective, we can choose to get help when we need it, we can choose Truth over lie, we can choose kindness, we can choose to make the world and people better for having known us rather than worse for even having been in our path.

    i choose the former.

    Like

  116. Farm Boy says:

    This year, we’ve seen several expressions of internet wh0ring, including the marketing of virgin brides and virgin prostitution and the InstaWhore phenomenon. For those who may have missed it, InstaWh0res are women who use Instagram and other social media forums to attract well-heeled, overseas “customers” for vacation wh0ring abroad, something like the female version of sex tourism, except that it pays $$$.

    https://sigmaframe.wordpress.com/2019/10/09/yet-another-variety-of-internet-whoring/

    Like

  117. Farm Boy says:

    Does she identify as a man?

    Now GQ has made her one of their men of the year for 2019. The headline of the Daily Telegraph reads: GQ Men of the Year 2019: Andrew Scott, Rory Stewart and Greta Thunberg

    https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2019/10/09/shes-their-successor-to-christ-their-man-of-the-year/

    Like

  118. RichardP says:

    Ame – I anticipated that response from you (because it is a correct response), which is why I put (short version) at the end of the sentence. I agree with you that the issue can be way more complicated than what I stated. But it can also be as simple as what I stated. And one of the pains of life is that we often have no way to prove whether we are faced with the complicated version or the simple one.

    tl;dr: I initially said “people cannot be anything more than what they can be (simple version)”. The better way to say that is this, because this is what causes the problems between people: people cannot perceive anything more than what they can perceive (at the moment). Unfortunately, when who they are is someone who consistently slices your heart to pieces, it is hard to remember / accept that they don’t perceive that they are slicing your heart to pieces.

    The development of personality involves many different things. But those who study such things generally conclude that personlities are pretty much fixed (which is why we can have tests such as the myers briggs test, etc). This is too extensive a subject to get into here in any detail, and so I was just noting in passing the fact that folks tend to be who they are, and we have to deal with that. Some change is possible, but usually far less than we think.

    Ultimately, when this conversation is followed through to its logical conclusion, what we are dealing with is the question what can we hold folks accountable for?. There are several situations in the Old Testament where God did not hold children younger than 20 accountable because they didn’t know the difference between good and evil. Phrasing it that way suggests that accountability is a function of what we know, what we can know – which itself is a function of how well the mind works. And a fifty-year-old, whose mind never develops beyond that of a five-year-old, will forever belong in that category of younger than 20, who doesn’t know the difference between good and evil. There are a great many things that go into determining how well the mind works – some genetic, and some environmental, as has been discussed here and elsewhere. Poke around this link, particularly the E, F, G, P, & Q codes, to see some of the things that can interfere with normal development. 2020 ICD-10 Codes

    Which brings us to what you’ve heard me discuss before – and this is why I discuss it: we don’t respond to what is; rather, we respond to what is perceived. And, in order to know that a choice is possible, required, one must first perceive the things we must choose from. If we don’t perceive them, how can we choose? Indeed, how can we know that a choice is required? And, if we don’t perceive them, how can we be faulted for not choosing? We don’t all perceive the same things – which is one of the things that creates problems in communicating with each other – we assume that the other perceives what we do, and so the slight we perceive must be intentional. Specifically, I perceive that what I am thinking of doing will cause the child pain, so I choose to not do it. Another, who does not perceive that the thing will cause the child pain, will not see that a choice is required, will do the thing, and devastate the child. That is not easy to accept, but it is a reality of life.

    It is so easy to say Dammit – I did it. So you can too. Maybe yes. But maybe no. You say in your response to me that we all get to choose. But the truth remains, and always will remain – we cannot choose what we don’t perceive.

    Like

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