And so when women are in control of the social discourse, as they more or less are today, the discourse becomes utterly dominated by male-generated threats and the mitigation of those threats, while any actual male concerns are dismissed as irrelevant or insignificant in comparison — because from the perspective of most women, based on the way they are wired, that simply *is* how they experience the world.
This is a presupposition by women not only that men’s concerns should be dismissed as irrelevant or insignificant, but also that men should not have these concerns at all. Women are saying these concerns are not just irrelevant, they are illegitimate and have no place in public discourse or thought. Men’s concerns about #MeToo are wrongthink.
To women, men’s thinking about consent and sex as self preservation and avoidance of accusations of assault are not just ill-advised, they are evil, sinister, malicious, and malevolent.
Women are concluding that men thinking about it this way is men saying that WE WOMEN are evil, sinister, malicious and malevolent. And with women’s predilection toward personalizing literally everything that’s said, individual women are concluding “well, he’s saying that I PERSONALLY am evil, sinister, malicious and malevolent.
In order to survive, men develop some measure of a thick skin. In order to survive, men learn to not take what might be considered slights personally (e.g. lack of promotion at work) personally. Furthermore, the team requires this of its members.
Women, on other hand, if not curbed by having to focus on real work to do, with expend energy considering their standing within the group (be it among friends, relatives, workmates). In the modern world, this is all so silly, making issues affecting the pecking order very personal indeed. It all goes toward the old academic concept of ‘”academic debates are the most vociferous because the stakes are so low”.
At any rate, women do tend to take things personally. They probably take things more personally when the criticism (as implied above) is legitimate. Women deep down know that vast swaths of women can, on the drop of a dime, become #MeToo accusers.
What to do? Hold your breath until you turn blue seems to be as good as anything