Back when I was a baby, men and women typically got married young, late teens to early twenties. It was pretty much assumed that anybody who was of quality was looking. The women did signal their intentions, and perhaps more importantly prepared themselves mentally for married life.
This was all well and good for the fellas, for they really want to have sex at that age. Furthermore, it was considered to be best if that sex had societal sanction. A young lady, singling that she want to get married was just what he wanted. To try to get the best possible bride, he would work hard, be it at the university and/or at the job in order to show that he would be a good provider.
Fast forward to today. Women in their twenties are riding the carousel, carousel watching, exploring the overly, goofing around with careers, doing whatever. They are signaling no intention of getting married. Furthermore, for many fellas, these women are ignoring them totally. The fellas get discouraged with respect to women; they maybe start drifting in their careers/jobs, then maybe put their time and effort into things that really do not signal provider; playing sports, fishing, hobbies, hanging with the guys, and so on.
For fellas in their thirties, they are more mentally mature while at the same time their urges are not as strong. Maybe women start signaling that they re ready to these men, but after defining a life of their own, are they as eager to engage women? Women as a whole have decided to run this risk. It has kind of worked out, as their have been lots of fellas to marry them. But will this continue? Would it be better for women individually and as a whole to signal earlier? For the children?
Addendum by Deti:
Dalrock has done a lot of posts on this.
The weakened signal is one
Essentially the posts talk about how men are not getting the “signals” from women or anyone else that “hey, it’s time to grow up, it’s time to get responsible, you’ll get a wife, you’ll get a family, you’ll have your own house/stuff/car/whatever else. So let’s start getting a wee bit serious about things and put away our childish things, K?”
And a lot of those signals came from the women about their age, signaling sexual attraction, which signaled:
“I am ready for marriage, I find you sexually attractive, I want to have sex with you, but I need to get married first. I am ready for all that. I want that. I want all that WITH YOU.”
She would do things like cook for him, get him gifts, spend time with him, etc. which signaled:
“I can cook meals. I have domestic skills. I am ready, willing and able to deploy those skills in our mutual service and in a home we make together. I am ready to take care of a home. I will be a good steward of your resources. I respect you and your time. I know it is valuable.”
And other kinds of signals.
Men don’t receive those signals anymore. So, what are women signaling now?
“I might be ready for marriage sometime, but NOT YET. Everything has to be perfect before I will consider marriage. Time, jobs, apartment, money, friends, education levels, kids — all have to be perfectly in place before I will even think about marriage to anyone.
“I want to have sex with attractive men. If you are hot, I will want sex. If you are not hot, I might want sex, if and only if you commit and go all in with your time and resources, and you have to put it all on the table first.
“If I have sex with you, whether you are hot or not hot, I expect you to give me the relationship I want, whether that be fuckbuddies, marriage, or anything in between. You are required to compensate me for the sex I give you.
“If I am in any way dissatisfied with you, I will blame you. Nothing is my fault, ever. You are required to give me what I want, when I want, and how I want it.
“I am not going to cook or clean for you. That’s not my job. I don’t have domestic skills and I don’t really want to develop any. If we have a home together, great, just so long as we can leave the relationship if we’re not getting what we want. I don’t respect you or your time; but you damn well better respect me and my time. My time is valuable; I don’t care what value you put on your time.”