It is suggested that a fine place for incels to find a good woman in is church.
There are girls who want to go home with a guy they met at a bar, but, as many of you no doubt have discovered, you are not that guy. And if you were going to be that guy, you’d be him by now. The sexual revolution, like any revolution, has its cruelties. As Ross Douthat put it in the New York Times, “Like other forms of neoliberal deregulation the sexual revolution created new winners and losers, new hierarchies to replace the old ones, privileging the beautiful and rich and socially adept in new ways and relegating others to new forms of loneliness and frustration.” So maybe just cross the club off your list. On the other hand, there are girls who want to date — and marry — a guy they met in church. You know where you find those girls?
Most congregations — and practically every church committee that doesn’t have the word “men” in its title — are lopsidedly female. Maybe what gets those ladies out of bed on a Sunday morning is fire in the soul. But it’s a safe bet that some of them are there, at least in part, for the same reason you are: They are alone, and they do not want to be. And they don’t want to say “We hooked up after knocking down six Mango Madness Margaritas apiece at happy hour at Bennigan’s” when their parents and friends ask where they met. “We met at church” is a better opening chapter.
I sure wish this was true. I wish that I could recommend this approach whole-heartedly. Unfortunately, there are issues.
First, I will give the Deti perspective. The women in church are much like all other modern women. They want the tingles; they want everything else. Even though they may act in a virtuous manner, they are secretly getting hammered by Harley McBadboy. There is probably much truth to this; as we have seen modern women expect their tingles (and at any cost). Some of the single church ladies might not presently being hammered by Harley McBadboy, but they do wish that they had the tingles experienced by the women who were. Short answer — tingles they want, either now or later (or both).
The typical young men in church are not the tingle generators. Part of this might be due to the fact that most young men do not generate tingles in hypergamous women, and part of it might be due to the fact that the church has taught them to be nice guys (i.e. acquiesce to everybody else’s whim). This is not a good start, one that is almost never overcome. One time that we saw it overcome was with Joseph of Jackson and the transformation of his men’s group. Naturally enough, they were were all ridden out of town.
Let us talk more about the young single church ladies. First I will describe what they should be, and then tell how they fall short. A primary aspect of Christianity is humility, to realize that we have a sin nature and that we must always work to overcome it. This is humbling. Fellas learn this all throughout their lives; they must scrap for what they get; so there is not really a problem there. My older sisters were versed in humility as girls. I saw it happen. I did not understand at time why this was happening; but I do now. They were being prepared for the upcoming years when they would have so very much unearned power. The notions of humility was to keep them in check, to temper their hypergamy, to make them understand that they were not all that. Moreover, it was to prepare them for a lifetime of where they would not be catered to as they might be in their most attractive years.
The modern single church ladies have been doused in self esteem from every direction. They want what all the other women want, but perhaps with a more righteous edge. There is no way that the current crop of men, or any crop of men, could satisfy them. I noticed this when I was a young man. So I never really bothered with them. In church – not in church, it really didn’t seem to matter.
My Mom, who was taught humility in her youth, really could not understand my attitude. But the young church ladies were not the same as in her youth. They were demanding, and expected that their demands would be met. Now, and after marriage. I knew that this would lead to unhappiness and divorce. A few years ago, I went to a charity dinner back in the town I grew up in. There was an older lady there asking me questions. When she found out that I was single, she immediately tried to direct me to her church where she stated that there were lots of single women. It was no sale.
In some ways, church women are worse than their secular cousins. They often have a sense of superiority and righteousness; while the secular women know what they are and deal with it in their own way.
Short answer — the lack of humility in young women sink them as possible wives. So much of their issues flow from this.
Disclaimer: Not all church women are like what is described above. There is a spectrum of course. Though it sure would be great if one could easily differentiate the good from the bad.