Hookup Sex

From here,

In the weeks following “Grace’s” babe.com tell-all about her bad date with actor-comedian Aziz Ansari, the internet has exploded with articles instructing women on how to date. Women should tell their partners “exactly what we want sexually, and how we want it,” suggested Roxanne Jones on CNN.com. HuffingtonPost quoted sex therapist Sarah Watson, who says that sexual pleasure is a woman’s “birthright.” 

Sexual pleasure is a woman’s birthright it says.  Perhaps in fairness, it should be a man’s birthright also.  After all, we are all the same, except that women have babies.  I would dare say that women need to work harder on making sure that this birthright for men is fulfilled. Anyway…

Newsweek counseled, “Consent must be enthusiastic, it must be verbal, and it must be specific.” But hardly anywhere in these myriad articles did anyone suggest that a woman’s sexual experience would be improved if she got to know her partner first.

Perhaps this is too much trouble.  It takes time.  It is less empowering.  It is less validating.  You might find out who he really is, not what you are projecting onto him.  There are a myriad of reasons for not doing so.

Call me old-fashioned, but I thought dating and sex were two different things. On a date, a woman can learn important things about her partner — things that may inform her decision about whether or not to have sex with him in the future. Is he polite, kind, and conscientious? Does she find him interesting? Does he make her laugh? Is he the kind of man she could imagine herself in a relationship with? And then — when she’s got a sense of who he is, if she likes him, and where the relationship is going — she can decide whether or not she wants to take things to the next level. But this, apparently, isn’t a feminist-approved dating technique.

It is not approved.  And for a good reason.  Feminists want women to be miserable so that they have power over them: “See the world is terrible, and we Feminists are your only friend”.

Our current culture’s obsession with consent highlights this disconnect. Of course any sexual encounter should be consensual. But the idea of needing written consent as “a cautionary way for one person to ask permission to have sex with another” (as sexologist Dr. Ava Cadell suggests in Men’s Fitness) seems like a step too far, assuming the couple is in an established relationship. People who know and trust each other are capable of sending clear messages about whether they want to have sex, and communicating with each other if something isn’t going well. A woman having sex with a man she doesn’t know, on the other hand, probably should have written consent — along with a portable panic button, a can of Mace, and a carload of male family members waiting outside.

Sex can be a risky thing.  Trust should be important.  But then again, if there is trust, then the excitement from the possible risk just isn’t the same.  Of course, women want the excitement of risk, without it being risky.

Psychology Today reports that women in relationships where there is mutual trust experience higher levels of sexual satisfaction than single women, according to a 2013 University of Waterloo summary of the research on sexual satisfaction in heterosexual women. A woman’s sexual satisfaction comes not from telling her parter which specific Kama Sutra position turns her on, but from feeling bonded with, and connected to, her partner. That’s why so many women leave their random hook-ups feeling dirty and violated. And that’s why random, meaningless sex is a bad idea for women.

Ah, now we are getting somewhere.  Perhaps during the act itself women really live it up; but afterward, the regret thoughts kick in, rendering the overall score a possible negative value.  Feminists encourage women to utilize their sexual power as they see fit, to live in the here and now, to assign thoughts of regret that might occur to men individually and the the Evil Patriarchy as a whole.  This does not seem to be a good long term plan for individual women; perhaps there are those that can testify as to its virtue.

Which brings us to this question: Does Feminism have anything to say about the long term other than “sexual empowerment and career”?

Posted in Dating????, FarmBoy, Feminism, Trainwreck
94 comments on “Hookup Sex
  1. earl says:

    ‘Perhaps during the act itself women really live it up; but afterward, the regret thoughts kick in, rendering the overall score a possible negative value.’

    And that’s where consent turns into rape.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Farm Boy says:

    And that’s where consent turns into rape

    For a guy that makes no sense

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Cill says:

    I don’t care how enthusiastic, verbal, and specific the consent is. It lasts only as long as the woman does not change her mind any time over the next decade or lifetime. MeeToo is a demonstration of how different the male and female minds are, and why we think their word is as reliable as a two-bob watch.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I personally have never been in a situation where I decided after the fact that something wasn’t consensual, but then again I have never done the hook up or one night stand thing. I may be an oddity there, but I am ok w it. The whole “sex wo any emotional connection or relationship” thing seems very odd to me. Can’t even imagine hooking up w some guy via Tinder and being in the sack same day. But I know some women do… I can’t explain the thinking.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I should clarify, there have been a few times in life where I was not interested or consenting and a guy wasn’t getting that, but it wasn’t something I decided later or after, it was something I absolutely already knew at the time and luckily in all cases situations I was able to outmaneuver. If a gal is unsure, she should be exiting stage left, not going along and then figuring out later if she did or didn’t.

    I also believe women should take ownership of personal safety and not drink or whatever to the excess that she might be unable to refuse consent or say no. Not that I am saying it’s fair game if she does do so.

    Men should assume consent is “feelz” based, which can change.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    This stuff comes up because of two things. First, women presume that men can read minds and know that women will change them later. Second, women will pull out all the stops to land a “hawt” guy. Regular guys are seeing this, calling “bullshit” , and walking away. This is not a guy problem. This is a girl problem and if women do not address it, a lot will be called into question.
    I do remember seeing a documentary on the development of birth control. One feminist was gleeful because she thought women could have consequence free sex like cads. It doesn’t work that way.


  7. earl says:

    ‘One feminist was gleeful because she thought women could have consequence free sex like cads.’

    There’s no group that understands women the least better than feminists.

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Farm Boy says:

    There’s no group that understands women the least better than feminists.

    And why is that?


  9. Farm Boy says:

    Men should assume consent is “feelz” based, which can change.

    That would make planning rather difficult

    Liked by 2 people

  10. True Farm Boy. I don’t know the solution except don’t have hookup type sex? Gals on Tinder doing this seem like they would be pretty high risk in general, IMHO. What’s the saying, “Don’t stick your dick in crazy.” Seems like very good advice.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    There is little risk. If anything goes wrong, they find a way to blame it on the boys.


  12. Farm Boy says:

    If anything goes wrong, they find a way to blame it on the boys.

    They really don’t need to “find a way”, just choose one from the standard selections

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Yoda says:

    A speech at Portland State University by James Damore, author of the infamous Google memo, was interrupted on Saturday night when activists reportedly smashed the sound system.


    Liked by 1 person

  14. Yoda says:

    Several employees were apparently awarded “peer bonuses” for disparaging Damore’s views. A “peer bonus” is one of Google’s peer-to-peer recognition systems, through which employees recognize one another for exemplary work with small cash bonuses.
    The lawsuit cites one such bonus, in which an employee named Matthew Sachs recognized a colleague named Simone Wu for “speaking up for googley values and promoting [diversity and inclusion] in the wretched hive of scum and villainy that is [Damore’s Memo].” The Google Recognition Team approved the bonus.


    Liked by 1 person

  15. Yoda says:

    Sex differences are now “discriminatory & constitute sexual harassment.” This will set scientific research back 50 yearshttps://t.co/Rs9FlTSD1P

    — Dr. Debra W Soh (@DrDebraSoh) February 17, 2018

    Is pointing out that women are more prone to depression (beginning at age 12) also discriminatory? https://t.co/PcLqZdISyX https://t.co/7c1SMbEpWY

    — Jordan B Peterson (@jordanbpeterson) February 17, 2018


  16. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Speaking of James Damore, here is Stefan Molyneux’s take on it. I am personally disgusted. It is as if the National Labor Relations Board sold out to feminists. We can forget about uing that source as a path to justice. Runs twenty nine minutes.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. earl says:

    ‘And why is that?’

    They think women can be like the worst traits of men and yet they hate men partly because of those traits.


  18. earl says:

    ‘I don’t know the solution except don’t have hookup type sex?’

    Yes that is the solution. Sex wasn’t meant to be for that.

    It’s like using drugs or some other addiction to cover up the real problem…and then it makes the problem worse.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    It has gone well past whether people should have no strings sex. We are looking at basic compatibility issues.


  20. earl says:

    That’s been going on since the fall of man.

    Problem is we seem to think we can get around those compatibility issues by getting rid of the commitment. Doesn’t work.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Yoda says:

    Problem is we seem to think we can get around those compatibility issues by getting rid of the commitment. Doesn’t work.

    Women apparently feel this earlier and more often they do

    Liked by 2 people

  22. Yoda says:

    We are looking at basic compatibility issues.

    “Be what you are/want to be” works poorly in this regard it does

    Liked by 2 people

  23. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I am really disappointed in the NLRB and how they dismissed James Damore.. It is like men should not even bother.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. RichardP says:

    Reason was not the goal, but an impediment to the goal. Measure people not by the quality of their arguments, but by the pungency of their hatred, and you will get exactly what we have gotten: generations of narcissistic nihilists who see themselves as right by virtue of the intensity of their feelings. … The indoctrinated are not the minions of their forbears, but are instead the ungovernable creation of a plan gone out of control.

    Deconstructing Critical Theory

    Liked by 3 people

  25. RichardP says:

    And this, from the same link. I wonder, with increasing frequency, why this thought is not being proclaimed more loudly in the public square:

    While it may make us uncomfortable to deprive people of the freedoms to which Americans ought to be entitled, we must face certain facts. When someone explicitly makes war on any and all of our existing institutions, it is foolish to imagine that he is, somehow, just our fellow countryman with different opinions. Such people are as much our enemies as any foreign invader.

    Liked by 3 people

  26. Yoda says:

    In an interview with IndieWire this week, the director of The Force Awakens and the upcoming, still-untitled Episode IX said viewers who criticized the film’s inclusion of more female characters and stories felt “threatened” by the changes.


    Always threatened we are they say.
    Perhaps like the characters we do not.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Yoda says:

    This month’s highly anticipated annual swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated features Olympic gold medalist Aly Raisman posing nude. The word “Fierce” and a sentence “Women Do Not Have To Be Modest To Be Respected” cover her side facing the camera. It’s all about empowerment. Or something. The 23-year-old athlete participated in the “In Her Words” feature of this year’s edition – a response to the #MeToo movement. Women were encouraged to write their own messages on their bodies.

    After Raisman went public with her story about abuse at the hands of Dr. Larry Nassar, she asked for help in the fight to support victims. Raisman’s point was that no matter how a woman is dressed, sexual assault is never ok. Douglas tweeted about dressing modestly so as not to “entice the wrong crowd.” She said women should be classy, with the implication that a woman may bring the abuse on herself


    Liked by 1 person

  28. Yoda says:

    Call him a witch they do

    “Adam Rippon really is turning out to be the witch who can’t be killed,” the lede of NBC’s announcement reads. “After three strong skates in his Olympic debut, Rippon will serve as an NBC correspondent for the rest of the PyeongChang Games.”



  29. earl says:

    It’s quite the disconnect…on the one hand the actions Dr. Nassar did to her are vile.

    On the other, her actions are worthy of judgement too. It seems like she’s being exploited to be the victim again…only this time under the idea of her ’empowerment’. I don’t think this fixes her trauma in the least.

    Liked by 1 person

  30. earl says:

    “Women Do Not Have To Be Modest To Be Respected”

    Yeah they do.

    Liked by 2 people

  31. earl says:

    Wives, in the same way, submit yourselves to your husbands, so that even if they refuse to believe the word, they will be won over without words by the behavior of their wives when they see your pure and reverent demeanor. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment such as braided hair or gold jewelry or fine clothes, but from the inner disposition of your heart, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in God’s sight. (1 Pet 3:1-3)

    I would think that last part about beauty would also be good advice for all women…not just wives. That’s even more than respected…it’s called precious in God’s sight.

    Liked by 2 people

  32. SFC Ton says:

    Respect women?

    Women are stupid and I don’t respect them
    Yeah I just have sex with them


  33. SFC Ton says:

    Women are equal and deserve respect……


  34. Yoda says:

    If not modest a woman is
    then viewed as non marriage material she would be.
    So clearly there is respect not

    Liked by 2 people

  35. SFC Ton says:

    How can a man respect any one who will suck a cock? And if she ain’t sucking your cock whats the point in keeping her around?


  36. earl says:

    Women seeking respect is egalitarian nonsense anyway. Men need respect much more than women do. Women should be seeking love.

    Besides it’s like trying to take all the money from the rich to make the poor richer…all it does is lead to less rich people.

    Being disrepectful to men doesn’t make women more respected…it makes them less respected.

    Liked by 1 person

  37. Yoda says:

    Wonder if Moehau Mans do hookup sex I do

    Liked by 1 person

  38. Yoda says:

    Church of England vicar is caught on video ‘inhaling from a crack pipe and discussing prostitutes as he says ‘I’m a very happy man’



  39. earl says:

    The biggest women’s fashion is hardly ever practical. I didn’t think wearing those leggings kept them warm in the winter cold.

    I bought Under Armour long underwear tights that I wear underneath my jeans or sweatpants when it’s cold outside. If women just can’t go without wearing their pushup bra for the butt…but want something to keep their legs warm, they could always wear those.


  40. Yoda says:

    Wonder if Moe this would be

    She said the creature was barrel-chested, with a head three times the size of a human’s, and appeared to weigh about 800 pounds.

    “He looked like a neanderthal man with hair all over him. He had solid black eyes. He had no expression on his face at all. He did not show his teeth. He just stared at the three of us,” said Ackley.


    Liked by 1 person

  41. Yoda says:

    Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said colleges and universities have not respected the due process rights of the accused when resolving allegations of sexual misconduct during public remarks earlier this week.

    A feminist icon and patroness of the #MeToo movement, the justice expressed sympathy with widely-held perceptions about systemic injustice in college rape tribunals.


    Liked by 1 person

  42. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    All those women wearing yoga pants are not showing off where men can see them. They are making a display of themselves where women can see them. I really have to wonder about all this. Are all American women latent heterosexuals?

    [Wonders about that one does]


  43. Farm Boy says:

    Real or fake?

    Liked by 1 person

  44. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Farm Boy,
    Three dollar bill fake.

    As for the swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated, women are buying all the copies.


  45. Cill says:

    The “Deconstructing Marxist Critical Theory” link at 7:21 pm above:

    “Their argument against conservatism, if they have one, has to be that things can be deliberately improved – not simply that blowing up the status quo inevitably leads to an improvement. The indiscriminate destruction of the status quo, however, is precisely what critical theory was designed to accomplish.”

    Marxism had the Bourgeoisie. Feminism has the Patriarchy. Feminists are Marxists’ useful idiots.

    Liked by 2 people

  46. Farm Boy says:

    A 19-year-old man in Sweden has been charged with abuse after he beat his 14-year-old sister with a baseball bat because she refused to wear an Islamic veil.


    Liked by 1 person

  47. Farm Boy says:

    Hamas banned a new TV station for women on Sunday, prompting an outcry that the Gaza-ruling terror group is “oppressive.”


    Liked by 1 person

  48. Farm Boy says:

    On Thursday, Professor of Religion and African American Studies at Princeton, Eddie Glaude, appeared on MSNBC to discuss the Florida shooting.

    During the segment, Glaude called out the alleged “toxic masculinity at the heart” of America’s “gun culture.”


    Liked by 1 person

  49. Farm Boy says:

    Have you ever wanted to Make America Great Again, but were too afraid that you just couldn’t do it alone? Well, a new site called “Trump.Dating” promises to help you hook up with other Trump supporters — in more ways than one.


    Liked by 1 person

  50. Cill says:

    ‘Hamas banned a new TV station for women on Sunday, prompting an outcry that the Gaza-ruling terror group is “oppressive.”’

    It’s not yet 5 am here and I don’t know whether to laugh or have a beer.


    Laughter will out.

    Liked by 2 people

  51. Cill says:



    Bloody hell I might have a beer as well. No it’s too early.

    Liked by 1 person

  52. Cill says:

    What a way to start the day. Hamas is oppressive. All is lost.

    Maybe the situation does warrant a contemplative beer after all…

    Liked by 1 person

  53. Farm Boy says:

    A recent Times article noted that the number of men age 65 and older increased by 21 percent from 2000 to 2010, nearly double the 11.2 percent growth rate for women in that age group.

    What are the implications — the benefits and the costs — of having more men around longer? While most experts say it may be only a blip, some demographers say that a surprisingly rapid rise in the number of men could cost society even more in retirement costs, since they earned more than women and would collect more, and they would add to the long-term care problem.

    But it’s not a parody, it’s dead serious and a bunch of “experts” pose a debate about how men dying as quickly and efficiently without bothering women is the best outcome


    Liked by 1 person

  54. Cill says:

    ‘But it’s not a parody, it’s dead serious and a bunch of “experts” pose a debate about how men dying as quickly and efficiently without bothering women is the best outcome.’

    But it is a parody if it’s one of the first things you encounter at the start of a new day. Or, perhaps treating it as parody is a survival mechanism for those who don’t want to die in a madhouse.

    Liked by 1 person

  55. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Farm Boy,
    Women distressed that their husbands might live longer? This is not good.

    I can see that you are perplexed. It is too early for beer. You will feel sleepy. You can still laugh all day about it.


  56. Farm Boy says:

    Hollywood A-lister Jennifer Lawrence says she’s taking a sabbatical from acting so she can help “fix our democracy.”


    Liked by 1 person

  57. Cheque d'Out says:

    Liked by 2 people

  58. Cheque d'Out says:

    Is that Mr Leach on the left? Wouldn’t wish to speculate as to the correct form of address for the creature on the right.

    Liked by 2 people

  59. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    The one on the left you pointed out as being from Bristol. He did once have a role commanding a submarine that was repainted pink. Thankfully, the movie was in black and white.

    Speaking of roles, Jennifer Lawrence is playing a dangerous game taking time off. She is blonde.


  60. Yoda says:

    If from Bristol he was,
    A pirate he should be.

    Timbers me shiver

    Liked by 2 people

  61. Yoda says:

    The xit on the right carry the piss bucket for the pirates he should

    Liked by 2 people

  62. Cheque d'Out says:

    Operation Petticoat was filmed in colour, or color for those of a colonial bent.


  63. Cheque d'Out says:

    Someone sharing many of my attitudes to BREXIT and Treason May.

    Her big gob is not always aimed wisely but she’s solid on BREXIT.

    Liked by 1 person

  64. Yoda says:

    A protester tried pulling the plug on fired Google employee James Damore and the rest of a panel at Portland State University Saturday by tampering with the audio system.


    Liked by 1 person

  65. Yoda says:

    Know this I did not

    Liked by 2 people

  66. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Spawny Get,
    I did see the movie on television. There was a long transition from black and white to color. For the longest time, no one knew the old Lone Ranger series were originally filmed in color. This gave the series a third life on broadcast TV, prime time, syndication as B&W, and re-release in color.

    Liked by 1 person

  67. Cheque d'Out says:

    Ruh Roh. They still don’t have a government. And one of the required partners for a Merkin government has been overtaken in the polls by the AfD. There may be trouble ahead if there’s another election if talks fail

    Liked by 2 people

  68. Yoda says:

    The BBC has recently reported that a British theater has cancelled the viewing of a Christian film that purportedly shows the testimonies of individuals who have voluntarily left the homosexual lifestyle.

    Vue is a chain of movie theaters in the UK, and the Christian ministry “Core Issues Trust” booked a theater in Piccadilly, London in order to show their film “Voices of the Silenced.” LGBT activists got wind of the film and immediately bombarded the management of the theater with demands to cancel the viewing. Vue caved to their demands.


    Liked by 1 person

  69. Cheque d'Out says:

    Current stand-in leader of UKIP – live

    Liked by 1 person

  70. Cheque d'Out says:

    UKIP guy seems pretty good. Hasn’t committed to running to be leader

    Liked by 1 person

  71. Yoda says:

    Moe’s Mum show her up she should

    Australia and New Zealand will be the next destinations for Hillary Clinton’s What Happened book tour, with “exclusive first access” tickets to hear her speak in Sydney, Melbourne and Auckland announced.


    Liked by 1 person

  72. Yoda says:

    But, obviously, the official emoji people can’t please everyone, and some social justice warriors are particularly angry that there are no new “transgender” or “gender non-binary” emoji people — and that there’s no way to separate emoji couples to create non-hetero-normative combinations, and no “pregnant man.”

    That’s right. No pregnant man.



  73. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Censorship seems to be their “go to” response.


  74. Cill says:

    The patsy on the right at at 5:05 pm is too weird to attract a homo, I think. Maybe a feminist would dig him. He could be an exemplar of a-patriarchal. He could ride Big Red like a rodeo star and beat her about the head with his scented sox.

    Liked by 1 person

  75. Cill says:

    He would need a strap-on for the job of course.

    Liked by 2 people

  76. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Cill, It might be good to get everyone practiced in doing the Bronx Cheer.

    Make Hillary feel right at home!


  77. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    If we are talking about riding Big Red, a remote location would be a good idea. I don’t think Wyoming would be far enough.

    Liked by 1 person

  78. Moehau Man says:

    Yes well, if that Hillary sheila sets foot on the rugged Coromandel, I’ll be waitin. I’m about to fashion a new Kauri Club, which I will name “The Eye Straightener”.

    Liked by 1 person

  79. Yoda says:

    Hillary a Sheila she is?

    Liked by 1 person

  80. Moehau Man says:

    Well I never could see much difference between foreign jokers and foreign sheilas. Moehau Man males have brow-ridges to distinguish them from the Moehau Man females.

    Liked by 1 person

  81. earl says:

    What boys (who are living under a single mother household) are doing today.


  82. SFC Ton says:

    Is that Mr Leach on the left? Wouldn’t wish to speculate as to the correct form of address for the creature on the right.

    Fuck face works well for most occsions

    Liked by 1 person

  83. Yoda says:

    “I think the long-lasting pieces and poster children if you will, of the #MeToo movement will remain the Weinstein crowd. And I think that may actually end up hurting the Democrats,” Sununu said during the Fox News interview. “Because it will point out that they’ve been hypocritical on this issue for years and hypocrisy is something that does move voters



  84. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I don’t know what to think. YouTube recommended this video.


  85. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Sorry, this video.


  86. […] brought this to my attention over at Spawny’s […]


Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: