Knowing What It Is Like To Be A Bloke

A common refrain in the Manosphere is that single (often divorced) women in their 50’s are in for an awakening.  They no longer can command the attention that they did in their younger years.  In effect, it is said, they then know what it is like to be a guy.

IT does seem to be true that females are treated better than males, even when there can be no expectation of an intimate relationship.  I noticed this when my older sister was always treated better by people than I was.  Perhaps some of this was due to my INTJ Death Stare, but even after taking that into account, she was treated better.  People would offer to do things for her, she would get lots of opportunities, doors would fly open for her, etc.

This was really my first lesson of men have to do, women just have to be.  Men have to work and scrap to get anywhere.  Nobody “covers” long term for a man.  This is the way that it has always been, and will never change.

As for those 50-something women, their appearance has diminished, and the magical spell that it had over people in general is mostly gone.  They no longer are of use to the tribe as baby-makers, so they must be useful/appealing in other ways.  Often at that stage, they have little to fall back on.  Perhaps they are a gracious grandmother, this is considered useful.  Perhaps they are a bitter bitch working a useless job, this is considered to be not useful.  Naturally enough, most do not want to be judged (like a man), but that does not stop people from doing so.

Posted in INTJ, Lies, SMP, Trainwreck, Why
129 comments on “Knowing What It Is Like To Be A Bloke
  1. Yoda says:

    Much deference to potential baby makers society does give

    Liked by 2 people

  2. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    “Much deference to potential baby makers society does give.”
    Great truth in that statement there is.

    As for the fifty year old women knowing what it is like to be a man, I don’t think so. All she knows that is relatively new is what it is like to not be approached. By that point, her checklist looks like George Carlin’s list of things you can’t say on the radio, several feet long.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Cill says:

    Even if a middle-aged woman was capable of thinking objectively, I doubt that she could have any inkling of what it’s like to be a man.

    Liked by 4 people

  4. Cill says:

    I sometimes compare my brothers and myself with my sisters, who are the female version of exactly the same recipe. The differences are huge. My sisters are pretty and dainty, their brothers are anything but. On average we are 9 inches taller than our sisters and more than twice the body weight.

    I’m sure none of us could begin to imagine living in a body of the opposite sex. The differences in speed and strength must affect the entire outlook. The brothers have much more confidence, for a start.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    While there may be a few times in their lives that they would like to understand, i very much doubt that they would make the effort.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Cill says:

    If they did manage to understand what it’s like to be a man, they’d be shocked out of their skulls.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    You made me think of Molly.I think that she could deal with it. She likes men and like to see them fed.


  8. Stephanie says:

    This is kind of relevant (not that it matters much LOL) but this gave me a good laugh tonight… watching Stefan’s dialogue with this woman. He’s so kind. I really like how he talks with her, even though she’s really messed up and has missed a lot of great years of opportunity to get married.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Without watching all ninety seven minutes of Stefan Molyneux, which I presume is excellent, i can’t believe that the purpose of my existence is to advance some woman’s ambition and assist her in checking boxes on her life’s goal list.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I had hoped we were done with her. She is like a bad penny.
    Sorry, Choicy.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Yoda says:

    Wonder if Moehau Man Sheilas know what is to be a bloke I do

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Moehau Man says:

    WTF do Moehau Man female think?


  13. Moehau Man says:

    Eat my loin cloth

    Liked by 2 people

  14. SFC Ton says:

    I’m thinking the 50 year old woman who didn’t let herself go receives more attention then the typical beta. No real way to prove that, and most women these days let themselves go before they are 19 which probaly means that sort of 50 year old chick gets way more attention then she would normally get in a more sane society

    Liked by 2 people

  15. SFC Ton says:

    It’s her job to get married and have kids
    No one said it’s our jib to wife her up

    Liked by 2 people

  16. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    That is an awful lot of money from the Australian government. It would have done a lot more good had it stayed in Australia.
    Hillary needs to prosecuted.

    Moehau Man,
    I guess that I can’t eat your hat, or any other article of clothing.
    I think you need to find one that smells of pickelets and chase her with your Kauri club. Ask her opinion later.

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Spawny Get says:

    I watched the first half(?) of that molinerx show. As the Wise Ton said, the advice given to her was appropriate for her, but any man should run like hell.

    She’s too old.
    She’s going to park her debt on hubby and then give up work. She clearly doesn’t like work.
    If she has a kid she’s perfectly capable of deciding that she doesn’t like being a mommy either. Only one kid and done? Plus hire a maid and a nanny so she can indulge her fantasies of competency at doing something frivolous, expensive and money losing (a niknak boutique style shoppe?).
    She’s whiny now, she’ll be a fecking harpy once married.
    She’s an entitled child looking for a sugar daddy tied to her in marriage.
    If When she decides that marriage doesn’t suit her she’s very capable of taking every penny hubby has and justifying it to herself…’baby wasn’t happy’

    She’s a complete clusterfuck of a prospect for marriage.

    Liked by 4 people

  18. Spawny Get says:

    A treat for you

    Eraser of Love • 35 minutes ago
    The Iron Duke of North Chingford boasts a high pain threshold, certainly in the wilderness years he laughed in the face of being spun on the captains wheel bound and gagged like a new born infant having his kidneys tenderizied by a black latex cock or a fem dom priestess of the dark esoteric arts from the hindu kush shredding his nerve endings and pressure points to dust via splintered wooden butter paddle.
    However , the Iron Duke baulks at the prospect of listening to James O brien this morning.. the pain amplification produced by that fuccking cunts tonal resonations and voice modulations dripping with impregnated sincerity and piety before apportioning blame to everyone from Tommy Robinson to Sandy from Crossroads is even for the Iron Duke to bear.

    Forgive me.

    Can you feel your mind being stretched along with your vocabulary? I can.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Eraser of Love does have a talent for conveying graphic images.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Yoda says:

    Heard from Moe’s wise Mum lately we have not


  21. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Moehau Man’s wise old Mum should have a whole post. Also, we hardly ever hear from Mrs. Yoda any more. She is wise too. It would be good if she had a post.
    I know. For all this, you want a post from me.
    How about a post from Molly extolling the virtues of Manuka honey?

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Spawny Get says:

    Nothing to see here…move along now…everything is fine…All Hail The £3 Tramp…he’s proud

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    Reminds me of a study done on folks that had a sex change. On the whole, they were a miserable bunch (mental illness will do that to you), but on average, the males who went female were much less miserable than the females who went male. I imagine this is why.

    Liked by 2 people

  24. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Spawny Get,
    I wonder if Labour would ever consider doing something that would benefit people who actually work? I know, it is a novel idea.

    Cautiously Pessimistic,
    Johns Hopkins doesn’t do sexual reassignment surgery anymore, yet they pioneered it. They gave it up because too many patients had committed suicide.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Farm boy, awkward question, bc she’s your sister, but were she not what was her attractiveness on a scale of 1-10? In her youth? Or would you say it was more her personality that got people to cooperate?


  26. Funny how women thing it’s *easier* to be a man. The whole feminist movement is based on it!

    Liked by 1 person

  27. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    If they weren’t so malicious, we could tell jokes about them.


  28. Stephanie says:

    I know… I regret I’m really not that nice or kind to women like this at least in my thoughts…. I mean, it’s hard not to see their own self-made situation and get kind of angry at them for being so dumb (that sounds so mean 😦 ).

    But seriously… why didn’t she listen to her dad when he warned her NOT to go into those ridiculous majors? My parents warned me and pointed me toward STEM and I remember seeing lots of girls going to college with me pick easy ridiculous majors that wouldn’t make that much money. And they viewed college like she did “a big 4 year slumber party.” I’m sorry, but it’s soo hard to feel sympathetic to that when I was studying constantly and working my butt off to get A’s in a major that most dropped out of. But I love how kind he is… probably because I wouldn’t be :/ and wish I could be.

    But I was married for 8 years at her age, with 2 children… WITH my degree (which was maybe a waste, but at least it makes good money and I can go back when they’re older). It’s just frustrating to see women like this complain about their life when they almost purposefully MISSED all their opportunities.

    I’m not a unicorn… I knew SO MANY girls that got married to CHRISTIAN MEN (like she’s looking for) just by putting themselves in the right place at the right time. I met my husband in a campus Christian group, like many other happy women (obviously they’re married with kids by now) did along with me. There was even a joke on campus that our group was called Campus Crusade for Couples (supposed to be Campus Crusade for Christ) because SO MANY found their life partners there.

    So I definitely get y’all’s frustration that she’s probably going to settle her debt and ridiculous life choices on to some poor man, but hopefully they will be happy and she’ll be extremely good to him (Stefan’s advice) and manage his home etc. It could work… if she puts her heart into it.

    Liked by 3 people

  29. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    …but hopefully they will be happy and she’ll be extremely good to him (Stefan’s advice) and manage his home etc.

    Well, it’s a sucker’s bet, and there are still a few suckers out there.

    Liked by 3 people

  30. Stephanie says:

    Wow!!!! He really rips into her denial and projection of her problems onto men around the 1 hour mark.

    Definitely doesn’t let her off the hook for blaming her singleness on no men available, her constant inability to commit to a life path and career, etc.

    Stefan is just awesome. He’s kind and yet knows when to really be brutally honest.

    Liked by 1 person

  31. Spawny Get says:

    I can’t remember how far in I got, I found her voice and attitude annoying. And her problems self-imposed and unrecoverable from.


  32. Yoda says:

    The Prime Minister has said the “Islamist” attack on Parliament was not “Islamic”

    Liked by 1 person

  33. Yoda says:

    Former interim Labour leader Harriet Harmen said the attack should not “be used as a pretext for division

    Liked by 1 person

  34. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    The Prime Minister has said the “Islamist” attack on Parliament was not “Islamic”

    Ah. So the usual suspects are back in charge? Makes me wonder why they sent whatever the English equivalent of SWAT is to handle the incident, rather that a traffic cop and ambulance. Obviously this was nothing more than an unfortunate traffic accident and accidental stabbing.

    Liked by 2 people

  35. Spawny Get says:

    Oh we’ve had police chuffs talking about the problem of far-right groups today. I wouldn’t even know who the far-right is…but I do know who’s killing people

    Liked by 3 people

  36. Spawny Get says:

    Just watching this now. No idea if it’s any good

    Liked by 2 people

  37. Spawny Get says:

    In happier news

    Liked by 4 people

  38. Spawny Get says:

    Regarding the missing HWNDU flag

    Liked by 3 people

  39. Moehau Man says:

    Moehau Mans don’t wear hats. We sometimes wear a bruise on our pate from the random blow of another bloke’s Kauri Club, especially when we are tupping his missus.

    “Forsooth”, Mrs Moehau Man (my soothsaying old mum) quipped just then, “as ye sow, so shall ye reap.”

    Liked by 2 people

  40. Yoda says:

    We sometimes wear a bruise on our pate from the random blow of another bloke’s Kauri Club, especially when we are tupping his missus.

    Perhaps not so random the blow would be

    Liked by 1 person

  41. Moehau Man says:

    “The blows”, Mrs Moehau Man (my knowledgeable old mum) observed just then, “the blows are random although the swings are not.”

    Liked by 2 people

  42. Yoda says:

    Here are six ways a man can boost his life expectancy.

    1. Stare at boobs

    It may seem like an inconvenience, or an invasion of privacy, to many women but staring at boobs creates a positive mindset in men.

    The same effect occurs when they look at cute animals.

    A 2012 study, published in the Archives of Internal Medicine, looked at the effects positive thinking had on men’s health.

    After a year, positive thinking had a powerful effect on health choices.

    More than half of the patients with coronary artery disease increased their physical activity versus 37 percent in the control group, who were not asked to write down positive thoughts in the morning.

    Liked by 3 people

  43. Cill says:

    Boobs are fine… but they just don’t go with rubbish that spouts from the mouth above them (most of them at least). Boobs and mouth (female) are the sublime and the ridiculous, respectively.

    Things are very different if mine is the mouth above them, of course.


  44. Spawny Get says:

    You’ll be on about the film Wobble Wars next.


  45. Yoda says:

    Like boobs I do

    Liked by 1 person

  46. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Was the other cute animals? Here are panda cubs hampering work because they are all play and no work.


  47. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I have noticed that about you. One thing that can be said for boobs, they say no discouraging words. I wish Tarn were her to add to the discussion.

    Liked by 1 person

  48. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    More pandas.


  49. Yoda says:

    I wish Tarn were her to add to the discussion.

    Her boobs also add to the discussion they could


  50. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Both left and right they were and had their own user names. What I never understood was how they could type. Voice technology had to be unlikely. They can’t talk.
    Very mysterious that was.

    Liked by 1 person

  51. Yoda says:

    Use the Force they did

    Liked by 1 person

  52. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    “These are not the droids you are looking for.”


  53. Yoda says:

    Blokes do this not

    Looks like feminists have devised another brilliant and highly persuasive plan to win over President Donald Trump: send him a giant vagina stuffed with letters!

    Liked by 1 person

  54. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I think that feminists have made it very plain that they are the mortal political enemies of Donald Trump. On getting elected, he owed them no favors. Maybe he should show them as much respect as they show him.

    Liked by 1 person

  55. Cill says:

    FB I’m lining up a post for Sunday 00:01 a.m.

    Liked by 1 person

  56. Cill says:

    Trump should introduce their letters to one of his own anatomical parts, and use them as chuff-wipe.


  57. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I just got through the Stefan Molyneux video. Over an hour and a half of him trying to talk her into getting married. It was painful. If women need this much convincing, and they have all the advantages, why are men helping?

    Liked by 2 people

  58. Cill says:

    I agree, Fuzzy. I don’t think Molyneux should do it. If she takes his advice, some poor bastard is going to be lumbered with her.

    Liked by 2 people

  59. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I don’t think you need worry. She’ll pursue her career.
    Why can’t they make more like Molly?

    Liked by 1 person

  60. Spawny Get says:

    Trying to remember how long I’ve been hearing this stuff. But they keep kicking the can down the road. Is it this fragility that makes the whole globe so, well, insane?

    Liked by 1 person

  61. Spawny Get says:

    Nigel Farage The Moment Has Come To Blame Politicians For Terrorist Attacks

    Liked by 3 people

  62. Cill says:

    Good stuff from Stefan at 8:25 am

    Liked by 2 people

  63. Spawny Get says:

    I watched some of it, it was good. Getting tired of the subject because the media is triggering my INTJ sensitivities to tsunamis of delusion and lies.

    Liked by 1 person

  64. Cill says:

    And good stuff from Nige at 9:27 am

    Liked by 2 people

  65. Cill says:

    IMO the most damaging politicians of all were Blair and Merkel. The world would be a much better place if both those detestable people had been sectioned at birth.


  66. molly says:

    “Why can’t they make more like Molly?”

    Thanks Fuzzie!

    You are right I was made by my female elders and mostly by my dad and men like Cill. I am very very fortunate and it usually makes me cry I’m so grateful!

    Liked by 3 people

  67. Spawny Get says:

    “I was made by my female elders and mostly by my dad and men like Cill”

    Spread the blame wide, why don’t you 😉

    Hope life’s running well.

    Liked by 2 people

  68. Yoda says:

    Cill writing another post he is.
    Good this would be

    Liked by 1 person

  69. Yoda says:

    Just woke up from a dream I did.
    Eating Manuka honey on toast I was

    Liked by 2 people

  70. Yoda says:

    Perhaps Saturday at 00:01am better for Cill’s post it would be


  71. Spawny Get says:

    Can we lose the violence words. If you think that I’m mad to be concerned about consequences of such on my blog then you aren’t paying fucking attention. Thanks very much


  72. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    It is too bad there are no native bear sin New Zealand to enjoy Manuka honey.

    Molly!!! Burrito, burrito, burrito.
    I am glad that your family did such a good job with you. I wish there were more like you.

    Spawny Get,
    The silver lining about the attack is that he used a vehicle and a knife. These terrorists are running out of resources.
    As for the econ video, the good news is that commodities aren’t inflated. I remember Paul Gross saying, before it all hit the fan, that every asset class was inflated. Stocks are inflated because the world is using that as a place to park money.


  73. Stephanie says:

    Speaking of “Knowing what it is to be a bloke,” ….. this is an interesting thread of comments and concerns over young adult women who are *chaste* *modest* and *Christian* and yet are having a very hard time finding a marriage partner for some unknown reason.

    These women know what it is like to be an invisible man:

    I thought about it after listening to Stefan’s talk with the 28 yr old, never married but WANTS to be married Christian woman (not fat)… I counted up 19 couples that my husband and I saw get married in college. It really needs to be stressed though that in our experience of seeing all these Christian couples find each other, MOST and I really do mean most, of them found their life partner in some kind of religious group on campus.

    I feel sorry for Elspeth, she’s been complaining about this problem for the 3 1/2 years I’ve been reading the manosphere. But she says her daughters are still going to her church that she remarks has ZERO prospects for them (all the young adults “vanish” after high school).

    That was my church when I was 18 as well. And when I saw that there were like 6 people from high school that stayed around (and mostly girls and no prospects really), I LEFT. I traveled all around town to about 9 different churches during that time to find a good college group where there were LOTS of singles my age. It really does take a good bit of discernment of if you’re in the right place at the right time (why stay where there are ZERO prospects for yourself?).


    There’s another problem with that thread (it is an amazing thread though). They aren’t thinking at all about these young adult Christian women (chaste, modest, not fat, etc.) as to whether they have the kind of personality traits to make men more attracted to them. It’s **not** enough to just be quiet, kind, sweet, chaste and Christian and young. I know sometimes the manosphere makes it seem that way because it’s full of age 35+ men, but it’s just not. It CAN be enough if maybe you’re hot enough that guys will still go after you even if you’re quiet, but ***usually*** guys that age want women who have a more social/outgoing personality and are more direct (like Stefan admits what hooked him so well).

    When I think back to college which wasn’t that far off for us, the girls who had a really hard time that WEREN’T fat or really unattractive, were the ones who were just there and quiet and really not that outgoing. The ones that hid their personalities due to shyness had a very hard time, they may still not have even found husbands (and they’d be 30 now). I knew two black sisters (twins) in our Christian college group that were just so attached at the hip (they should’ve been split up for their own good so they could find a guy easier) and they were much too quiet and shy to be noticed when there were that many *other* girls there snatching up men like popcorn. They weren’t fat at all, they were definitely modest and chaste, and sweet, but they had a huge disadvantage in being so shy/introverted. Their parents probably wouldn’t have thought of them as shy or introverted though, they were successful pre-med students. But **in comparison** (competition really) to the other girls in the group, they had a significant disadvantage in finding a husband or even boyfriend.

    There were a plethora of other girls like that too I think, that were just a little too quiet and didn’t know how to really talk with guys in a way that was interesting. When there are other girls competing with you for snagging a husband, having that kind of disadvantage is far more significant I think.

    The old school book I have that my mom gave me from like the 1920’s advice about girls dating and finding a husband, it explicitly goes into how young women need to develop the ability to talk to men their age or older, engage them, flirt and develop a personality that is (in the author’s own words) “fascinating.”

    “Fascinating” is a pretty big deal. Even in the 1920’s they weren’t saying that it would be easy to snag a husband if you were mediocre in conversation and personality with guys. So this isn’t something new really with our gen Y problems… men have always been drawn more to young women who could captivate them and fascinate them with their personality. The book actually goes into that, citing authors from prior centuries describing the women who captivated them.

    I honestly think the girls that had a hard time thought they just had to show up and be sweet, chaste, modest and Christian, and somehow draw men their own age to them. 40-50 year old men might recognize their value, but young 20’s Christian girls are not interested in older men like that. The young men (who are still kind of shy about who they like at that young age as well) really appreciate a girl who is more outgoing and has a personality and who can instigate the conversation with a shy man or brave man.

    Liked by 3 people

  74. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    It has been a while since I traded comments with Elspeth. I was not aware that she was still having trouble fixing up her daughters. They are at a disadvantage. Black women have a horrible reputation among black men, to the point where a lot of black men won’t even try. They would rather stay single, celibate, and not live on a corner of the roof with the biblical contentious woman.Also, it was Free Northerner who had a chart of what worked as venues for meeting and church has gone dead. I think the reason is that the whole congregation will know if it doesn’t work out. Church used to be a great venue. As for what you wrote in your comment, a lot of women have nothing in common with men. That doesn’t make for a good discussion. Women have to learn how to socialize with men. It would help a lot to find common interests. The sexes have polarized so much that decades ago, I concluded that restaurants should have pink and blue menus with no items in common.

    Liked by 2 people

  75. Yoda says:

    Chelsea Leibow alleges that her former boss, ex-CEO Miki Agrawal, “touched an employee’s breasts and asked her to expose them, routinely changed clothes in front of employees, and conducted meetings via video conference while in bed, apparently unclothed,” according to New York Magazine. Other allegations include Agrawal sending nude photos of herself and others (like her fiancé) to colleagues, analyzing the size and shape of coworker’s boobs, and detailing her past sexual experiences.

    Liked by 1 person

  76. Stephanie says:

    I agree with you fuzzie that they really may have a disadvantage being black. In the campus groups I saw all those 19 couples get married, none of them (female or male) were black. We only had one eligible black guy in our campus group and I’m sure he did get married because he was handsome, smart and knew what he wanted in life. Most of the blacks on our campus (at least in my city) kept to their own racial groups and they were kind of wild. They didn’t have any specifically “Christian” groups to join for their own race I think. So again… that is a pretty big disadvantage if you look at it that way.

    But if you read that post and thread of comments, apparently Elspeth or Scott have statistics (I’ve never seen any like those before though) that say 75% of black women do eventually get married by age 35. That doesn’t seem to add up to me with the out of wedlock births for the black population though, but I don’t know anything about statistics like that and maybe that’s a certain area (??).

    I do know of what you’re talking about though regarding black men not being interested anymore in black women… but you’d think her daughters don’t fit that paradigm (they’re sweet and nice!). Maybe there is just a dire lack of **young college aged black men** that are interested in marriage.

    And on the topic of where to meet… I think “Church” is totally different from meeting your spouse in a college Christian group. The campus Christian groups weren’t always associated with specific churches for example… some were like the Catholic group, but many were solely done at the campus. BUT… that said, it is not very smart to stay in a church where there is absolutely ZERO college students. It’d be much better if she made the twins split up if they’re not already, and pushed them to search all around the city for better Christian college groups to join where the young men are.

    Liked by 2 people

  77. Yoda says:

    The “Lifetime Impact Honorees” are all women whose work in 2016 and before have made the world a better place.

    This year, for no apparent reason, Chelsea Clinton, the daughter of former President Bill Clinton and former Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, will get a one of those awards for her service to…well, that part’s not quite clear.

    Liked by 1 person

  78. Stephanie says:

    My best friend from growing up is Asian and she moved to a city that had more Asians in it (smart idea since she was keen on marrying into her own race). In that city with a much larger population of Asians, there were several groups on campus (Christian groups) that were almost solely 100% Asian. They had SO MANY MARRIAGES she was going to a marriage a week for months during the Spring and Summer. Of course… that is where she found her Asian husband as well.

    But I *think* there may be more Asians that are conservative (way less wild) and willing to get married in their early twenties than Blacks. I could be wrong there, I haven’t looked anything up about that, but I don’t think I’ve ever heard of a Black Christian group on campus that was as big as the mostly white/hispanic or Asian groups like one called “Epic.”

    Liked by 1 person

  79. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    “75% of black women married by 35?” That doesn’t coincide with the last number I heard for overall 20 to 34 year olds 70% of whom have not married. Something doesn’t jive.
    I am glad for your Asian friends.
    If Elspeth is any indication, her daughter are wonderful. It is just that they are trying to trade in a very sick marketplace.

    Liked by 1 person

  80. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    That lawsuit you brought up at 3:38pm is the first that I have heard of that a nomially hewterosexual female employee is bringing against a nominally heterosexual female boss. I am going to guess that the female boss thought she was immune.

    Why does that not surprise me about Chelsea Clinton?

    Liked by 1 person

  81. Stephanie says:

    I agree Fuzzie… it’s just that the book I grew up reading mostly compiled from 1920’s pamphlets on the topic literally telling young girls how to catch a husband, went about it drastically different than the Christians discussing it on Scott’s blog. I mean they were a lot more open back then on what Stefan actually advised that 28 yr old Christian woman – to be very active in making it happen for yourself, very aware that you are in competition with other young women and it’s on YOU to make yourself stand out enough to find someone.

    Stefan even echoed what the 1920’s author said about a woman’s personality needing to be “fascinating,” when he basically said you need to be SO AMAZING that he can’t say no. Like completely captivate at least ONE guy and that takes a lot of effort on a woman’s part sometimes. That book I have from my mom has an entire section devoted to deliberately making a young man think he needs you now – needs to marry you soon!! It is chock full of little feminine tricks and understandings of how to get a suitable man to marry you.

    Think about the courtesans or high-end escorts and how well they study men and understand what drives them crazy in a woman. They studied men much like chaste women USED to study men. Now-a-days, Christian moms like Elspeth don’t want their daughters understanding that part of catching a man while still remaining chaste.

    Unfortunately, I’ve seen that even the male Christians commenting on Scott’s blog totally reject those elements of attraction and to raise their girls to be sensual but also chaste as well. They don’t like the basis of that book and old fashioned advice because it’s too “Victorian” and what Elspeth has called before “Angel of the House,” and skewing what “real women” are supposed to be like. Stingray used to get complaints from them as well because to them promoting feminine wiles and tactics to catch a man is “manipulation,” and “fake.”

    But yea… those tactics usually work though. For courtesans or chaste women… being sexually active has nothing to do with it (the book I keep referring to tells girls to wait until marriage of course).

    And no, it’s just not enough for a “plain” girl or how they call their own daughters 😦 “halfway cute” (so sad!) to just be there and be sweet and quiet and chaste and dress modestly. Sometimes it really does take some direct planning like Stefan was suggesting or feminine wiles to be “so amazing he can’t say no!” Even if it’s that there aren’t that many eligible men in their area, it’s on them to make it happen for themselves (like Stefan said).

    But from the comments from the women on that thread, they don’t want to hear that.

    Liked by 2 people

  82. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I am not going read through 173 comments. i’ll take your word. I can see your point. Women do need to be more proactive. They are not hothouse orchids. If they choose to leave men guessing, they may guess wrong. What has to be communicated is that the woman is interested and that goes double when sex is not on the menu.

    It has been a while since I commented on Stngray’s blog. I think it was about a year ago and she was mad about going to Daylight Savings Time. I found three locations that didn’t go there, Arizona, Saskatchewan, and Greenwich Mean Time, for navigation.


  83. molly says:

    Yo Stephanie I am a fascinating personality! I snag the men, eh.

    Ask Fuzzie and Unca S who are in my spell
    Look in my eyes and feelz it.

    Liked by 1 person

  84. RichardP says:

    Young men don’t generally dwell on the subject of marriage in the way that young women do. But, for many young men, after they’ve laid the groundwork they imagine will help them build a successful life, their thoughts will turn to marriage. This male tendency leads to a cliche that was popular some time ago, but don’t know if this is still true: Men generally don’t think of marriage. But – when they are ready, and when their thoughts do turn to marriage – at that moment, but not before, they look around to see who might be available.

    So – re Stephanie’s comments: the women learning and doing everything that Stephanie references in her comments will be wasting their efforts if those efforts are not directed to men who have determined that they are ready to marry.

    That is the value of matchmakers. They bring together both sexes who are at (roughly) the same stage in their readiness to consider marriage. Women displaying their value to men who are not ready to think about marriage may get good practice at displaying, but that is about all they will get.

    Introverts recharge their batteries by being alone. Extroverts recharge their batteries by engaging in a vigorous social scene. For this reason, introverts are not going to be at their best in the middle of parties put on to help young folks find a suitable marriage partner, while extroverts will be. It is not useful to encourage introverts to attract a partner’s interest by pretending to be extroverts. Away from the party, the introverts true nature will exert itself. The person attracted to the “outgoingness” of the other may feel betrayed when the introvert reverts to form.

    Liked by 1 person

  85. SFC Ton says:

    I haven’t been saying any violent words

    Beeman to busy trying to make the next version of me to do much else


  86. SFC Ton says:

    I always liked Stingray and hope all is well with her and hers

    Most dudes in the man o sphere are like reverse feminist. Feminist think men should be like women, the man o sphere thinks women should be like men

    Me? I like women as they are, flaws and all. Feminie wiles are fanfuckingtasitc! I think it’s beyond stupid to let women vote, drive cars, have rights etc like adult men or be anything but property of her closest male relative or husband, but I like women being women.

    The man o sphere generally ain’t like that and most dues here want their own version of fried ice


  87. Stephanie says:

    ” in her comments will be wasting their efforts if those efforts are not directed to men who have determined that they are ready to marry.”

    I don’t know!!! That book is so strange, I so wish I knew how to upload photos (I’ll try to figure it out) even just a cursory look over the chapters would probably really interest moms who are concerned about their daughters catching men. I mean, the entire second half I just looked over, is devoted entirely to how to get a man interested in you and in marriage even when he may not be ready or want marriage at that point. There are a lot of things women can do apparently to help that process along. It’s all there!

    The book is like 200 pages working on the young girl’s character developing her to be sensitive to men and understand herself and what men really want and need (the first part). Then the next 100 pages are all about catching a man worthwhile.

    And yea Molly lol… it really does sound ridiculous or presumptuous to be like “I’m developing a fascinating personality…” I’m probably butchering how it comes across when you actually read the book. It’s definitely not a perfect book in every way, but wow it really works.

    Liked by 1 person

  88. Stephanie says:


    “It is not useful to encourage introverts to attract a partner’s interest by pretending to be extroverts. Away from the party, the introverts true nature will exert itself. The person attracted to the “outgoingness” of the other may feel betrayed when the introvert reverts to form.”

    ^^ You have a point about the other person feeling betrayed (it’s possible!), but in reality, introverts really do have a harder time and it IS good to encourage them to try to be more extroverted. The book I keep referring to literally tells young girls to treat shyness as a fault (!!!). Men can get by with being introverted and shy maybe a little easier I think. For young girls, being a wallflower is actually emotionally painful and weakens her confidence with men for the future. Girls **want** to be noticed, even if their very introverted and quiet. Being passed over constantly because she’s not interesting enough (too quiet) and deemed possibly “boring,” 😦 is NOT a good thing you want your daughter to experience over and over again. Being a wallflower at dances because she doesn’t know how to force herself to overcome shyness is setting her up for repeated failures with men. She may still find a husband eventually, but it will be a much harder route.

    A few years ago I saw some study that said that introverts were a lot less happy overall. I think it was an all female study (it was in a beauty magazine). I’ve found that to be true with many introverts I know, a lot of them have anxiety issues, depression issues, or just really lonely a lot of the time, and when I used to be a lot more introverted in middle school, I remember feeling the same way.

    The study researched people who forced themselves to get more comfortable in social situations and found that they became a lot more happy when they forced themselves to be a little more extroverted. Again though, I really think it was female only study and this may not apply to male introverts who seem to kind of like being that way. Obviously some women may like it too 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  89. Stephanie says:

    Since I can’t figure out how to post pictures into comments without giving too much info out, I’ll just post the chapters for anyone somewhat interested….

    Part 1 – THE IDEAL WOMAN
    – The Kind of woman a man wants
    -Accept a man at face value
    -His sensitive pride
    -His reserve
    -Sympathetic understanding
    -The role of man
    -Inner Happiness
    -A worthy character (for the girl)
    -The domestic goddess
    -Feminine Dependency
    -Radiant Happiness
    -Fresh Radiant health
    -Confidence or Social Ease around men

    -Where and how to meet men
    -Choosing a mate
    -The six stages of winning a man
    -Winning a man’s attention
    -Arousing a man’s interest
    -Creating a desire
    -Overcoming judgment
    -Securing Action
    -Do’s and Don’ts

    It really is soo good and still so applicable to today. The book is called “The Fascinating Girl.” Again it’s not perfect and probably not for everyone, but much of it is like lost treasure in this age of insanity regarding dating and marriage.

    Liked by 2 people

  90. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I have to confirm what Molly said. She knows how to tug at heart strings. I think a lot of it has to do with linking pictures of food. She knows where bears are weak.

    Liked by 1 person

  91. RichardP says:

    I know this isn’t a science class here but Stephanie, you seem to have an inquisitive mind. I’ll point you in a specific direction and you can follow it as far as you are interested. Books of the sort you are referencing tend to come from the point of view that people are all alike and therefore will all respond the same to the same stimuls (do these 9 things to get your man). My point is that, for example, being noisy to attract the attention of one who struggles with sensory overload is probably not a good strategy.

    Generally, introverts expend energy in interactions; extroverts gain energy in interactions. Introverts recharge their energy batteries by being alone. Extroverts recharge their energy batteries by being in the middle of the party. At it’s most basic, the distinction is made based on how a person responds to sensory overload. Some are charged by it; others are depleted. At the biological level, this distinction is not really something that one can change at will. It has to do with whether your nervous system has a lower or higher threshold for registering sensations.

    In the scientific literature it is referred to as augmenting / reducing. Those with a high threshold for pain require a higher level of stimulus to “feel” anything. They seek out or augment stimulation, and are called “extroverts”. Those with a low threshold for pain require a lower level of stimulus, for they “feel” things easily. They seek out a respite from sensory overload and are called “introverts”.

    [I’m trying to create small links here. My appologies if this doesn’t work.]

    List of Links

    Augmenting / Reducing and Personality Differences

    Reducers are more extroverted and more sensation-seeking than augmenters; they are also less sensitive to pain and they have higher scores on the RAPM test. The fact that individuals selected for contrasting EP response patterns differ on these psychological variables supports the idea that there is a neurophysiological basis for individual differences in personality, pain perception and intelligence.

    [SG – I tried to sort out the tags]

    Liked by 2 people

  92. RichardP says:

    Aside from the fact that the quoted material is not supposed to be blue, it seems like the links work properly.


  93. RichardP says:

    You can also Goggle on this title:
    “Relationship between “strength of the nervous system” and the need for stimulation” – or Google for related articles by Weintraub, Green, and Herzog – or any one individually. I’m referring you to the basic research that later research refers to. Bottom line: personality differences that are biologically based are real and need to be accounted for. When it comes to pairing people up, it’s not a “one size fits all” situation.

    On a lighter note, Susan Cain wrote a very useful book entitled “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking”. Her TED Talk on the subject is also interesting and maybe a bit more accessible.

    Quite: The Power of Introverts


  94. RichardP says:

    Thanks SG. Gotta go to bed. It’s 3:52 here in Los Angeles. UCLA basketball lost tonight. Got my juices going.


  95. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Liz is very ambitious.

    Liked by 1 person

  96. Stephanie says:

    Aww I miss Liz!

    Richard you are right that introverts recharge that way… I’m not trying to say that all people are the same, but for female introverts (not completely sure about males but I’d guess it’d be a little similar – Farm Boy thoughts??), it just makes dating a lot harder.

    I’ve always wondered if the extroversion/introversion personalities had a scale so to speak. I mean… my husband is more introverted at times, but is also outgoing at times. I’m the same way! We are so alike it is insane that we managed to find each other. And I know “shyness” isn’t the same thing as introversion, so sorry if it sounded like I was lumping them both together.

    I think when you’re talking about teen and early twenties girls, introversion and shyness gets kind of convoluted. They may be “true introverts” that recharge their batteries when alone, or they may incorrectly think of themselves as introverts (what I may have done personally) because they’re just shy or have no confidence when they’re that weird age.

    Liked by 1 person

  97. Yoda says:

    She says that people are talking only about Muslim and Hispanic “victims,” and not black “victims,” and that itself is a new form of racism.

    Liked by 1 person

  98. Yoda says:


    Sense a whole series of posts about this subject that Farm Boy write he will I do

    Liked by 2 people

  99. Yoda says:

    Dolezal has penned a memoir in which she compares her travails to slavery and describes her harrowing childhood as a pale, blond girl growing up poor on the side of a Montana mountain.

    As she toiled in the garden for her strict, Evangelical parents, she’d dream of freeing her inner blackness, Dolezal writes in “In Full Color: Finding My Place in a Black and White World.”

    Liked by 1 person

  100. Yoda says:

    A new post there is


  101. Cill says:

    “you aren’t paying fucking attention”



  102. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    A colleague of Liz turning to a life of crime? Where will it all end?

    I have a hard time feeling sympathetic to Black Lives Matter when they don’t get enough attention.
    Is that mean?

    Liked by 1 person

  103. Yoda says:

    Much competition to be the “grievance king” there is


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