Previously I had suggested that women might try a different approach to online dating. Basically it consisted of advertising that you were feminine, such that men might actually be interested in you. Well, by sheer coincidence, a woman tried it.
I am still privy to the complaints of many friends trying to navigate the single life. Among my male friends still out on the prowl, by far their biggest complaint is that they want an old fashioned sort of lady, but saying so out loud gets them labeled sexist, misogynist, or worse. The old adage, “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach” is true; they just want a nice woman to settle down with who can cook and bake her way into his heart, who likes to watch Netflix and, since there will inevitably be chilling afterwards, eventually start a family too.
Let’s just face it. There is a huge market out there for real women. This lady understands it. Probably vast swaths of women understand it.
Over the weekend, I was talking to one of my single girlfriends, Meredith, who is so amazing it boggles the mind how she can possibly still be single. She was walking through a subway station and noticed signs printed on the walls from women who declared themselves to be “on strike” the weekend of Trump’s Inauguration. What are these women on strike from? Oh, just a few things like: “Emotional Labor, Childcare, Diapers, Housework, Cooking, Sweeping, Laundry, Dishes, Errands, Groceries, Fake smiles, Flirting, Makeup, Laundry, Shaving.” In short, they’re striking from life.
First of all, please don’t use the word amazing. It is overused on entities that are not really amazing, at least not to an INTJ.
In response to one woman’s post about going on strike because she was a full-time wife and mother and also worked full-time, Meredith remarked “I’d kill to be in her situation. A husband, job and kid? Count your blessings, lady.”
Why are so many women so unappreciative of what they have? Perhaps it is the curse of Eve. Or perhaps it is because of modern Feminism and its You Go Gurl mentality. Or both.
Which got me thinking: How can Meredith and other women use this insight to their dating advantage? We’re all tired of hearing complaints about how everyday life is now supposedly intolerable since Donald Trump is president. How might conservative single women of America counter this hyperbole? I suggested Meredith alter her online dating profile to clearly set herself apart from the women on strike, and being a good sport, she immediately agreed.
As stated in my post from two years ago, it really is not that difficult. I do wonder why women will not even consider the suggestions (exceptions for this lady).
“Unlike others, I’m not on strike this weekend. Still smiling, dealing with emotional labor like a grownup, and living my life. I laugh at jokes, bake delicious things, make a mean cocktail, and don’t believe in that patriarchy thing.
This would be music to many a man’s ears. First of all, she unequivocally says that she is not one of those rabid Feminists. In fact, she doesn’t seem to be a Feminist at all. As Jesus said, “It is easier for Lena Dunham to fit through the eye of a needle, than for a Feminist to be happily married.” I met Jesus on trip to Las Vegas; he had lots of good wisdom.
So she is kinda happy, a grownup, cooks, denies emotional hangups (living my life); low maintenance with value-add. What is not to like?
Given the choice, how many American men would prefer a woman who has stopped shaving, smiling, and washing up their dirty dishes over someone like Meredith? It turns out, not many.
So here’s a joke. Why did Sumo Wrestlers start shaving their legs? Because they did not want to look like Feminists.
Just twelve hours after editing her profile, Meredith checked in with an update about how her edits were affecting her popularity on the site: “It totally fricking worked. I just got asked out for dim sum by a financial dude. I changed it, started swiping, and all the sudden my matches blew up. Having a great conversation now with a very cute guy about the current culture of dating.”
Son of a gun, it worked! There is your proof. Well, actually it is anecdotal evidence. Still, it is strong anecdotal evidence. Don’t hold your breath for more evidence though. No University or Foundation is going to commission a study on such. This is one of those things that is true, but society does not allow to be widely admitted to be true.
It seems that there is a real arbitrage opportunity there.