Self-esteem comes from within. It is the knowledge of one’s own inherent value *outside* of what others think. As the quote above says “It is a judgment of oneself“. This is very different than external validation, which girls get in truckloads while boys get scraps. You can be told all day, every day that you’re awesome…but if you never have to make an inner judgment of said awesomeness, those are just pretty words. Boys get the other side of the coin, where nobody expressly tells them they’re awesome, but they judge themselves all the time. Hence, self-esteem.
Let us start by saying that the whole self-esteem movement was started mostly to give girls a boost. At the time of its start, lots of women principals and administrators were on the scene, and lots of lefty education professors were spouting all sorts of stuff; so it was a perfect storm. So esteem it was. In addition, the classroom became more “girl-learning” oriented, with lots of memorization and regurgitation. As for the boys, well, they are on their own.
Yet here we have Tarn saying that all of that forced self-esteem, and all of the power that they have during their teens is not enough to generate any real true self-esteem. If so, why would this be? Maybe it is because they realize deep down that they are being paid in a debased currency. They did not really earn their power and position. Perhaps the ones that have weaker hamsters are the ones who cannot effectively exploit their position, and wallow in the disconnect.
Now consider the boys. They are handicapped in school and elsewhere. But what they do, they earn. It has always been that way for boys. They might not be incentivized in the right places, but they often do find places where they can earn accomplishment. If nothing else, they work to obtain high scores in video games.
In the olden days, girls were taught domestic skills and how to be a lady. Building and implementing these skills was an accomplishment. It was not necessarily easy, and furthermore, it was useful. Perhaps accomplishing this brought girls of the day true self-esteem.
Today’s teen girls really don’t seem to learn anything more than the in and outs of being in the “in-group” or being in the “out-group”. This is not particularly impressive