A few years ago I was in a Panera Bread restaurant. I opened my laptop, went to a webpage, and one of those autoplay ads started blaring away. I within seconds stopped it. A young woman from the other side of the place got up, walked over, and in a very superior tone suggested that I stop playing. This, after at least twenty seconds of silence, after a two second burst of sound.
She apparently was none too bright, as the pattern of sound suggested that it was a one time incident; and not the precursor to a continuous event. But the tone with with she talked was striking. It has this “I am so awesome, so you probably should do what I suggest out of my awesomeness. Or if you don’t, I will get the manager”. I really didn’t get a full insight into her, but she probably thought that she is much more capable, smart, skilled, etc. than other people, especially men. This was her frame.
Two questions arise,
- How did she get this frame?
- Why is her frame apparently never tested?
The answers are inter-related. Modern girls are not raised with the old-time constraints/virtues (e.g. modesty, service, etc.). Instead they are raised with a healthy dose of princess crap topped with lots of self-esteem. With a side of victimhood. They are allowed to do most anything that they want; and when they do something bad, they are often not called on it.
An analogy would be a bunch of cats living in a city eating royally out of garbage cans. They are not really wild, as they do not have to hunt for their food, with all of the required skill to do so. But they are not domesticated either. Rather they are, for a lack of better term, feral-fat.
So short answer – the frame comes from never really being constrained, tested, or called out; and it can be maintained for the same reasons.
In the next post, we will consider young men’s frame.