Perfection — The Enemy of Contentment


When I was a young boy, I watched a story unfold between my Mom and Dad.  My Dad was given a task to stop at the grocery store on the way back from work and get a box of yellow cake.   He came back with a box of lemon cake.  He was told that this was not what was desired, and the next day he came back with a box of some other yellowish cake (but not yellow cake, which is yellow because of egg yokes).  On the third day, he finally got what she was asking for.

My Mom might have been angry and complained about his incompetence.  This approach is apparently the modern way to do things.  However, she did not respond in this manner.  She was mildly amused at the whole affair, and thought it a bit endearing.  For cake boxes was not my Dad’s place of expertise, and it would be silly to necessarily expect perfection.  My Mom appreciated the things that were his domain of expertise, particularly his job.  And she appreciated the hard work that he put in to make money.  And in the end, all of the things he did were more than good enough,

So how should wives handle situations like the above?  Should they become frustrated, resent her husband and generate marriage toxins?  Or perhaps realize that husbands are not perfect, and appreciate what she has?

Which would be better for the children?

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Posted in FarmBoy, Marriage
132 comments on “Perfection — The Enemy of Contentment
  1. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Farm Boy,
    I think that you are right. In this day, your father would be expected to get it right the first time and with an inadequate description too.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Tarnished says:

    Nobody is perfect thus nobody should expect perfection. Wives should not look for it in their husbands, nor husbands in their wives. To do so would invite resentment to the relationship. Instead, have love for the good parts of their character, laughter and forgiveness for the imperfections, and share your strength when they work to overcome their demons.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. SFC Ton says:

    Women cannot appreciate less then perfect husband’s etc

    #1 because we know wives, girlfriends etc are perfect themselves and only do things that are, at most semi wrong because some man drove her to it

    #2 because of their insecurities

    Really it’s both, but which one drives her bitchyness is solely depending on the moment

    Like

  4. It’s true way too often today I see couples (usually the female half) turn small things into big things. It takes maturity and self control to consciously not “go there” and unfortunately these character traits (and character in general) are little valued in today’s “now, now, now me, me, me” world. Is it really worth fighting over piddly details? One might win the battle (“you didn’t get the right cake mix!” often followed by a temper tantrum tirade about every other minor and major past fail) but lose the war.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Off topic, I saw this and had to link. What is eye popping are the stats from a number of countries comparing never married rates for women aged 40-44 from the eighties to present.
    http://bobagard.blogspot.com/2015/10/to-marry-or-not-to-marry.html

    Something tells me that we already have triple the number of spinsters we had in the eighties. Why this hasn’t hit the fan yet is beyond me.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Tarnished says:

    From Fuzzie’s link:
    Here is a sampling using never-married rates for women aged 40 to 44:

    Australia (from 5 percent in 1986 to 15.6 percent in 2006 );

    Austria (from 8.2 percent in 1981 to 20.5 percent in 2011);

    Brazil (from 9 percent in 1980 to 33.8 percent in 2010);

    Denmark (from 5.7 percent in 1985 to 21.8 percent in 2011);

    France (from 7.5 percent in 1985 to 27.9 percent in 2009);

    Germany (6.4 percent in 1990 to 24.1 percent in 2011);

    Hong Kong (from 2.7 percent in 1981 to 16.5 percent in 2006);

    Japan (from 4.9 percent in 1985 to 17.4 percent in 2010);

    Norway (from 6.1 percent in 1986 to 27.8 percent in 2010 ); and

    The United Kingdom (from 5.6 percent in 1981 to 22

    In the United States, between 1980 and 2012, the proportion of women
    aged 40 to 44 who had never been married almost tripled, rising from 4.8 percent to 13.8 percent.

    The US and UK aren’t even close to being the worst, though. Just take a look at Brazil or France.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I know that cohabitation is going to be proposed as the reason for the difference. I don’t think so. I think that they are at home watching DVDs and eating ice cream.
    To take it back to the original topic, could it be because they were expecting prefection?

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Tarnished says:

    Also off topic, but our friend and sometimes commenter Francis has a new post up here that is very much worth reading.

    https://francisdroy.wordpress.com/2015/10/11/are-women-oppressed/

    An excerpt from said post, which I would stand and applaud for until my hands were numb:
    This is what I advocate: adult women should be treated as are adult men. They should be expected to handle life’s joys and rough edges just as a man would. Women, during the emancipation movement sought the freedom to have control over their own lives, not to have control over others’. She should expect no treatment that is beyond or below that which men receive. Having the right to freedom in the most advanced, the safest, the best-fed society the world has ever known, she should endure the same minor discomforts of living that men do. These are the simple duties for which the rights that are granted to all of us exist.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Tarnished says:

    It’s entirely possible, Fuzzie. I sometimes read the various blogs of dating coaches for women, such as Evan Marc Katz. It’s amazing the amount of “there’s no good men in my area”-isms and similar tropes that get thrown around at these sites. Even huge cities like Austin, Miami, Seattle, and NYC are apparently somehow suffering from a dearth of eligible late 20s-early 30s menfolk, to say nothing of smaller towns.

    This comes as a great surprise to me, as I am on first name terms with a great many fantastic bachelors in that age range…

    Liked by 1 person

  10. SFC Ton says:

    Tarn do you think your idea of fantastic bachelor fits the norm?

    Like

  11. Tarnished says:

    …no.
    It fits the norm of what women say they want, but not what the majority actively go after. My own sisters, mother, stepmother, and previous classmates/coworkers are unfortunately proof of this.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I think that they may be chasing some sort of ideal from Hollywood, or wherever, that was popular last week. The problem stems from them all chasing the same small group of men.

    SFC Ton,
    I think that Tarn’s outlook is different. Rather than looking for reasons to disqualify, she is lookng for positives.

    170 lbs. in equipment and 35 lbs. in the parachute? I could be wrong but, they may be loading paratroopers down more that Cavalry did during the Indian Wars.

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Tarnished says:

    The problem stems from them all chasing the same small group of men.
    +1 👏

    Rather than looking for reasons to disqualify, she is lookng for positives.
    *shrug* I’m not actively looking. The positives are just there. Most of the guys I know each have something beautiful about them. It’d be more difficult to not see them.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Tarnished says:

    Which may seem weird if one considers the somewhat misanthropic streak I have against our species in general, but it’s important to note that I don’t experience it on an individual level. 😛

    Liked by 2 people

  15. SFC Ton says:

    LOL proved my point Tarn

    Sadly most men don’t measure up to any semi strong masculine standard

    Like

  16. Tarnished says:

    On the third day, he finally got what she was asking for.

    All’s well that ends well. As the story progressed, I was half expecting your father to accidentally bring home some uranium… 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Yoda says:

    To take it back to the original topic, could it be because they were expecting prefection?

    A perfection that they can define not.

    Liked by 2 people

  18. Yoda says:

    Why this hasn’t hit the fan yet is beyond me.

    When bears think of food not,
    think of shit they do.

    Liked by 2 people

  19. Yoda says:

    It fits the norm of what women say they want, but not what the majority actively go after.

    Ever notice this women do?

    Liked by 2 people

  20. Tarnished says:

    They can’t define it, because it’s not real/possible. It would just lead to goalpost moving each time someone got closer to the temporary definition, and such an unstable demand would necessarily mean it can never be fulfilled.

    Bettering oneself, or helping others to better themselves is a worthy aspiration. Asking for perfection of obviously imperfect beings is just a waste of everyone’s time and energy.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Yoda says:

    It’s amazing the amount of “there’s no good men in my area”-isms and similar tropes that get thrown around at these sites

    Desire sexy, moneyed and willing to commit they do.
    Others need to apply not

    Liked by 2 people

  22. Tarnished says:

    Ever notice this women do?

    Sometimes. It likely depends on how badly they’ve been burned by bad past decisions, if at all.

    Like

  23. Tarnished says:

    Desire sexy, moneyed and willing to commit they do.

    This shouldn’t be much of a problem…so long as they bring the same traits to the table as they’re asking for. The issue is that they frequently do not. (NAWALT, obviously.)

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Yoda says:

    I think that Tarn’s outlook is different. Rather than looking for reasons to disqualify, she is lookng for positives.

    Thinks like a practical nonentitled guy she does.
    Big difference makes this does

    Like

  25. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Yoda,
    A good thing it is
    to think only of food.

    Tarn,
    I don’t know what is killing dating but, I don’t think it’s the boys. Curiously, they’re the ones more willing to adapt.

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Yoda says:

    I think that they may be chasing some sort of ideal from Hollywood

    Wonder what criteria Kardashians do use I do.

    Liked by 2 people

  27. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Yoda,
    For years, I saw the image of Kim Kardashian on the cover of magazines. I thought she was good looking. One night, I was channel surfing and came across their program. Once she opend her mouth, all attraction flew out the window.
    That family had to drive Bruce Jenner around the bend.

    Liked by 4 people

  28. Spawny Get says:

    I’ve never endured Kim opening her mouth. Her freakish arse is freakish…and not in a good way IMHO

    Liked by 3 people

  29. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Spawny Get,
    The backside is a recent development. I had forgotten about it.

    Liked by 1 person

  30. SFC Ton says:

    Survival was a much trickery thing for women then men. So is child production, and because survival conditions vary, or can vary greatly it all makes sense that women want the top 20% and that their definition of 20% varies as well.

    Want doesn’t make sense is women’s liberation, treating them as adults etc etc. It’s a dumb idea as recent history shows. Hell even ancient history shows it.

    Like

  31. Liz says:

    I’ve always maintained that people who complain about trivialities aren’t really concerned about those trivialities.
    Last holiday season, Mike went out to get some ingredients for a pie he wanted me to bake. I asked for corn syrup, he came home an put a box of corn starch on the table. I looked at it for a moment and then started laughing. Then he took a bottle of corn syrup out of the bag. We’re a home of practical jokesters.
    He’d bought the right thing, he was just being tricksy. 😛

    Liked by 4 people

  32. I agree Liz, I was thinking flying off the handle at a small thing should not be ignored. It’s either a sign of immaturity to the point of emotional imbalance on one hand, or a full blown b cluster personality disorder on the other. Neither makes for good relationship material.

    For example, one game narccists play is to set someone up. Say ask their partner to do something like get a cake mix, but be intentionally vague, then be pissed to the extreme when the “right” thing is not produced, seeing it as “proof” the partner doesn’t love them enough or whatever. Except had they brought A, the person meant B, but had they brought B, the person meant A. It is a no win trap from the start. Just for example. Not good. Dealing w people like that is beyond taxing and I have unfortunately known too many 😛

    Liked by 2 people

  33. Liz says:

    Agreed, Bloom.
    But a woman who values and respects her man wouldn’t treat him that way (works both ways…that “intentional vagueness” for later bitching purposes reminds me a lot of my first boyfriend. If he came of age today he’d probably troll Heartiste refering to this behavior as his super-savy ‘dread game’. But he was raised without a father figure in the home so he probably learned all of his manliness from his mom, RBF and all).

    RBF= resting bitch face

    Liked by 2 people

  34. Tarnished says:

    Thinks like a practical nonentitled guy she does.
    Big difference makes this does.

    In the majority of my teenage years, I had hardly any self-esteem and was constantly told to put others (read: just about everyone else) before myself. While in some ways this ended up being a good thing (bullies can’t break down what you don’t have, and it enables you to not give a shit about their social games), in other ways it was very bad (you become a doormat and kindness is blatantly taken advantage of). Still in the process of relearning that my happiness is worthwhile too, and being single helps with that a lot, as many MGTOW find out.

    Entitlement comes from having too much self-esteem…a belief that you’re somehow better than those around you solely because you’re alive, and thus deserve things or relationships that others have to actually work for. Such aspects of life aren’t handed out like Halloween candy to most, yet entitled people believe it should be. Unfortunately for them, the world doesn’t work that way for the majority, so they end up extremely bitter.

    Liked by 1 person

  35. Tarnished says:

    To be fair, Liz and Bloom don’t speak like they’re entitled either. Perhaps they can share the secret behind their own practical outlook?

    Liked by 1 person

  36. Liz says:

    Hm.
    I once did a visualization exercise. I can’t remember it exactly, but I was supposed to visualize a room, and a box and so forth…and a horse in the room next to the box. Well, my horse looked like a magical pony with wings and a rainbow aura. At the end of the exercise I was told what everything symbolized, and the horse apparently symbolized my view of my spouse. At the time I joked that Mike wasn’t a cross dresser (magical pony with rainbows and so forth put off a feminine vibe).

    So, I’m not so sure I don’t feel “entitled” because for me, everything about Mike is awesome. Even stuff that might annoy me (or has annoyed me in the past) with others, is awesome/funny and/or okay at least. It’s the same for him, I’m sure stuff his ex did that drove him crazy he finds funny/endearing or at least tolerable when I do it.

    Liked by 2 people

  37. Liz says:

    I guess I should add, it’s not like he could never ever anger or offend me. We’ve had our tiffs, and some pretty substantial ones at that. But we don’t make mountains out of inconsequential or trivial matters, and we always value each other.

    Liked by 2 people

  38. Tarnished says:

    So, I’m not so sure I don’t feel “entitled” because for me, everything about Mike is awesome. Even stuff that might annoy me (or has annoyed me in the past) with others, is awesome/funny and/or okay at least. It’s the same for him, I’m sure stuff his ex did that drove him crazy he finds funny/endearing or at least tolerable when I do it…we always value each other.

    I’d probably refer to this less as “entitlement”, and more as “found someone of similar value(s)”. It’d be entitlement if he tolerated aspects of you but you refused to do the same…and still thought you had a fair relationship.

    Liked by 2 people

  39. Liz says:

    Just thinking further, if Mike used what I called the Resting Bitch Face on my ex, I’d probably call it his “Really Badass Face”. LOL!

    Liked by 1 person

  40. Liz says:

    I can totally imagine seeing that and yelling to the boys, “Kids! Look at that! You need to learn to glower that way. That’s some manly shite, it will scare away large predators!”

    Okay, enough personal interspection for the morning. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  41. Liz says:

    Heh, didn’t see this before:
    “I’d probably refer to this less as “entitlement”, and more as “found someone of similar value(s)”. It’d be entitlement if he tolerated aspects of you but you refused to do the same…and still thought you had a fair relationship.”

    I think in our case, it’s more primal…although, yes, we definitely value the same things.
    I don’t think in terms of “fairness” in the relationship. I DO tolerate things he wouldn’t in me…and vice versa. I mean, it would turn me off greatly and annoy me if he did the things I do (I’m pretty girly, he’s pretty manly).
    I recognize you and I differ in this, Tarn.
    🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  42. Liz says:

    Here’s an example, Mike mentioned this yesterday when we were out on the boat.
    He and some friends spearfish often.
    The day before yesterday, a large bullshark was following them around. They tried to poke their spears at it and get it to leave but eventually they had to get out of the water because it wouldn’t stop bothering them. This is not an unusual event, sharks sometimes come around (I don’t like this aspect of his spearfishing activities, btw…I’d prefer he didn’t spearfish, but there’s also an intriguing element to it, so I wish he wouldn’t but I’m also kind of proud that he does, if that makes sense).

    When he talks about spearfishing (say, at the coffee shop) he says it never ceases to amaze him when other men will respond, “Wow, I’d be way too afraid to go spearfishing” when women (like the gf/wife) are around.
    It’s not the fact they’re afraid to do it, it’s the fact they’ll say this in front of their sigoths. It’s also fine to say this when the sigoths aren’t around. A group of only guys (or female friends they aren’t interested in ever having sex with), no problem.
    People have been conditioned to believe that this admission would be “sensitive sharing” making the perception that they are “emotionally vulnerable” and all that…women tell men all the time this is a good thing, and they’ll respect you more for sharing that type of vulnerability, but this is not true.

    “I’d be too scared to do that” sounds like something a woman would say. Even if it’s true….even if the topic were plummeting to one’s death and it’s obvious any sane person would be scared, that’s just not the phraseology one should use.

    It’s fine to say “I was scared when I was almost attacked by a shark”….fear itself is not emasculating. It’s sane to be afraid of a shark attack.
    but saying something like, “Wow, that sounds way too scary for me!” is. It’s a very feminine thing to say.

    He says he can usually see something die in that woman’s eyes when her man says something like that. And I’ll bet they go home and she bitches for ten minutes about the way he squeezes the toothpaste.

    Liked by 2 people

  43. SFC Ton says:

    Love spear fishing. Sharks are funny though. We had a 5 foot tiger shark that was always right friendly. Little unsettling the 1st time but afterwards you start looking forward to seeing her, like an old friend …. then you have a 15ft’er swim under your kayak and suddenly shit gets real. That thing was menacing, more so when he got close enough to see the tiger stripes

    Any rate sum up Liz in a lot fewer words
    Women already have a pussy, they (generally )don’t want a second one in their life

    Liked by 2 people

  44. Farm Boy says:

    But a woman who values and respects her man wouldn’t treat him that way (works both ways

    So perhaps many women do not value their men.
    Who knew?

    Liked by 1 person

  45. Farm Boy says:

    Nobody is perfect thus nobody should expect perfection. Wives should not look for it in their husbands, nor husbands in their wives. To do so would invite resentment to the relationship

    Yes, Mrs. Yoda discussed this subject here,

    https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2015/07/31/taking-out-the-garbage/

    Liked by 2 people

  46. Farm Boy says:

    I sometimes read the various blogs of dating coaches for women, such as Evan Marc Katz. It’s amazing the amount of “there’s no good men in my area”-isms and similar tropes that get thrown around at these sites. Even huge cities like Austin, Miami, Seattle, and NYC are apparently somehow suffering from a dearth of eligible late 20s-early 30s menfolk

    I will soon write a post about this, “Hypergamy and the City”

    Liked by 2 people

  47. Tarnished says:

    Any rate sum up Liz in a lot fewer words
    Women already have a pussy, they (generally) don’t want a second one in their life.

    I’d agree with this, because people do generally look for mates who are similar to them yet still complementary. This goes for sex, personality, and gender alike (for the overwhelming majority).

    I don’t think in terms of “fairness” in the relationship. I DO tolerate things he wouldn’t in me…and vice versa. I mean, it would turn me off greatly and annoy me if he did the things I do (I’m pretty girly, he’s pretty manly).

    That’s what I mean though. 😉
    It’s why I used the word “fair” instead of “equal”. Fairness, especially in the context we’re talking about, doesn’t necessarily mean you give X and he therefore also has to give X…in fact, given your mannerisms/personality types (you’re feminine, he’s masculine) it’d be unfair to expect the same from you both in terms of what you bring. So I’m unsure if we differ in this at all. 😛

    “I’d be too scared to do that” sounds like something a woman would say. Even if it’s true….even if the topic were plummeting to one’s death and it’s obvious any sane person would be scared, that’s just not the phraseology one should use.

    Hmmm. I’m trying to think of a time when either me or mine has said this. Neither of us tends to phrase things as “I’d be too scared to do X”…even imagining saying it seems, idk. Wrong? For example, I’ll willingly admit to being afraid of roller coasters and other high speed discombobulating attractions, but I’d never say “oh, I’d be too afraid to go on one”. Mostly because it’s untrue…I’ve been on numerous ones, which is how I know I hate them…but even thinking of it like an insurmountable activity is just weird. Gives it too much power over one, if that makes sense.

    Closest my guy has ever said is during his recountings of various, frankly idiotic, things he did as a teen. He doesn’t say “I’d be too afraid to do that now”, but rather “I’m glad I didn’t get hurt from doing that”, which I’ll wholeheartedly agree with!

    Liked by 2 people

  48. Farm Boy says:

    yesterday when we were out on the boat

    Here is a video that Mike and his friends made,

    Liked by 2 people

  49. Farm Boy says:

    this ended up being a good thing (bullies can’t break down what you don’t have, and it enables you to not give a shit about their social games),

    Yes, this is liberating.

    What it everybody did this?

    Liked by 1 person

  50. Farm Boy says:

    I once did a visualization exercise. I can’t remember it exactly, but I was supposed to visualize a room, and a box and so forth…and a horse in the room next to the box. Well, my horse looked like a magical pony with wings and a rainbow aura.

    Perhaps you visualized Tarn

    Liked by 2 people

  51. Liz says:

    “Perhaps you visualized Tarn”

    I hadn’t met Tarn yet. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  52. Tarnished says:

    Perhaps you visualized Tarn

    Liked by 4 people

  53. Liz says:

    Farm boy, from everything you’ve mentioned, your Mom was into your Dad.
    She valued him and respected him. That’s why the lemon cake box didn’t matter.

    Liked by 2 people

  54. Liz says:

    Hee hee. Cute video Tarn. 😀

    Thinking further about the topic (and I always seem to drag the minutiae of everything out this way) there are some seemingly insignificant things that do bother us though.
    It’s kind of inconsiderate to do something on purpose that you know the other person really doesn’t like…as a “test” or something. I dont’ think most people would do that, but it’s worth mentioning.
    For example, Mike really hates Burmuda shorts and Panama Jack hats. If he ever came home to me wearing an ensemble like that…well, he’d assume I wanted a rear entry.

    Liked by 1 person

  55. Farm Boy says:

    Farm boy, from everything you’ve mentioned, your Mom was into your Dad.

    I think that she was taught to respect husbands no matter what.

    Like

  56. Tarnished says:

    She valued him and respected him. That’s why the lemon cake box didn’t matter.
    Plus, it’d just be a frickin stupid thing to get upset about. If it was that big an issue (like the cake was needed for tomorrow morning), it’s generally easy enough to just make another trip to the store that night. Inconvenient, but hardly apocalyptic.

    Besides, now you have mixes for numerous cakes!🎂🎂🎂 Everyone knows more cake is more better!**

    It’s kind of inconsiderate to do something on purpose that you know the other person really doesn’t like…as a “test” or something.
    If you do this deliberately/consciously with the intent of causing drama…you are a Stupid. A mouth breathing, juvenile, insecure Stupid. That is all. Can’t stand Stupids. Are we able to send them to the moon yet?

    I dont’ think most people would do that, but it’s worth mentioning.
    Ummm. That’s probably where you’d be incorrect, Liz. :/ If it were true, the manosphere might not exist.

    **Yes, I did that on purpose. 😛

    Liked by 2 people

  57. Tarnished says:

    I think that she was taught to respect husbands no matter what.

    Obviously it didn’t hurt that he proved himself worthy of said respect by being a good husband and decent human being.

    Liked by 1 person

  58. Yoda says:

    Plus, it’d just be a frickin stupid thing to get upset about.

    Odd it is that modern expectations are that very mad a woman would be.

    Liked by 1 person

  59. Farm Boy says:

    Obviously it didn’t hurt that he proved himself worthy of said respect by being a good husband and decent human being.

    That isn’t enough any more.

    Also, my Mom watched her parents. Her Mom respected he Dad

    Liked by 3 people

  60. Tarnished says:

    Love and respect for each other is important for children to see. Failing that, it’s even more important that they hear about it actually being a real possibility from other relatives.

    Their husbands were deceased by the time I was born, but my grandmothers made sure I knew about them and how much they were still respected and missed. Thank goodness for that, ’cause otherwise I might be very jaded and cynical about the concept of love.

    It is terrible that children are growing up without either of these things. 😦

    Liked by 1 person

  61. Liz says:

    Well, I watched my parents and my Mom didn’t value my Dad like she should have. And he was a very manly guy (raised on a farm also, FB). But if he’d been a sensitive-new-age guy she’d have been a true shrew.

    As it was, she didn’t dare bitch loudly in front of him about something as trivial as say, cake mix, but she bitched to everyone else. Constantly. In a passive aggressive “I’m such a martyr, he’s such a bastard, aren’t I wonderful” way. There was no love or “valuation” there, beyond herself and her own existence. So again, I don’t think it’s about the cake box.

    Liked by 1 person

  62. Spawny Get says:

    Yes Tarn, that’s how I’ve secretly always seen you. (LMAO)

    Liked by 3 people

  63. Spawny Get says:

    If I could make it autostart…I WOULD

    Liked by 1 person

  64. Tarnished says:

    I thought so, Spawny. 😉
    How sad is it that I know about Flufflepuff…and she’s not even a canon character. Seriously, she’s a pony that the brony subculture made up themselves.

    I just like her because in their stories of Fluffle, her “older sister” is a pony version of a Necromorph from the Dead Space franchise, and she keeps a Red Marker in her living room. 😀

    Brony’s are so deliciously random and weird. I don’t enjoy the show as a whole, but have enough customers who love it that it’s possible to like it through them.

    Like

  65. Spawny Get says:

    Well, my fault, I guess.

    I sowed the wind, now we’re all reaping the whirlwind

    Liked by 1 person

  66. Liz says:

    I had never in my life heard of Flufflepuff until now.

    Liked by 1 person

  67. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    Now, I can’t get “Pink fluffy unicorns dancing on rainbows” out of my head!

    Liked by 3 people

  68. SFC Ton says:

    Bronies should be extinct, would expect extinct in a healthy society

    Like

  69. Tarnished says:

    Fuzzie,

    😈😈😈😈😈
    Bwahahaha!

    Like

  70. Tarnished says:

    Liz,

    I’m not surprised.
    You don’t work with/in that subculture, or even with gamers/nerds/geeks in general. And while bronys come in a plethora of types, from 28 yr old bodybuilders to scrawny 15 yr old boys, I don’t think anyone in your family is of “my kind”. 😛
    It’s all good though. Different people enjoy different entertainment.

    Liked by 1 person

  71. Tarnished says:

    Back slightly on topic since Fuzzie is here:

    Has our ursine commenter ever had luck with online dating at all in the past? It sounds like treacherous waters for many men…

    Like

  72. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I did get dates but, nothing stuck. Thereis also the matter of distance. Messgeing crosscounty is just as easy as crosstown. Finally, the women set unrealistic conditions believing that they had the upper hand.

    Like

  73. Tarnished says:

    What kind of conditions did they set? There’s a few guys I know, roughly my age (very early 30s), and their major complaints are of getting stood up with no forewarning or apologies afterwards.

    Liked by 1 person

  74. SFC Ton says:

    Tarn tell your friends to double book their date nights and have them meet some place they already plan on going. Don’t travel more then 30 minutes unless they have 4 bitches lined up. That was if one flakes they have a back up, if both flake.. who gives a fuck? It was game night any way

    In almost all things and at almost all times your friends should put themselves 1st, in this case their time should be considered infinity more valuable then a woman’s

    Liked by 3 people

  75. SFC Ton says:

    Friend told me his most recent online date brought a friend with her. A real man hater then expected him to pay for all three of them.

    Liked by 1 person

  76. Tarnished says:

    expected to pay for all 3 of them.

    Wha…? Who the hell does that? How incredibly rude!

    Liked by 3 people

  77. Liz says:

    “Friend told me his most recent online date brought a friend with her. A real man hater then expected him to pay for all three of them.”

    Holy shit. Are you serious?

    Like

  78. Liz says:

    Jinx 123 posted at the same time as Tarn.

    Like

  79. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I never did have a problem with “flaking”. The primary problem was not getting responses to messages. It’s easy to tie up the better part of a night looking at profiles and finding someone with a little promise. Write an original message nad you never hear back.
    OkCupid, on its ho,e page, used to print revisions of profiles. One bisexual woman said that she was giving up on messaging women. The guys were much chattier.

    Liked by 1 person

  80. Tarnished says:

    …on its hoe page…

    The only appropriate response to this typo is roflmao. 😀

    Liked by 2 people

  81. Tarnished says:

    I’ve heard that at any given time 10-15% of female profiles are fake “fillers”. Could the guys be chattier simply because they are, y’know…real?

    Like

  82. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I don’t know if OkCupid still does it but, there was a little device on profile pages that would give you a clue to responsies. A blue dot for not having ben messed that week, green for a good likelihood, yellow and red like a traffic light. When I stopped, most women’s profiles had gone to red.

    As for conditions, When it looked like there were possibilities, the women took sex off the table for various reasons.

    Liked by 1 person

  83. Yoda says:

    OkCupid, on its hoe page

    How hoes advertise on OKCupid they do?
    Looking for LTRs they would be?

    Liked by 1 person

  84. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Yoda,
    I am still making typos. Sorry. But, I am getting better. 🙂
    That was meant to be “home page”.

    Liked by 2 people

  85. Tarnished says:

    I still prefer the typo.

    Liked by 4 people

  86. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I heard two things about Ashley Madison that were beyond credible. While it was a dating site for married cheaters, it may be reflective of the industry but to an extreme. First, from Cptain Capitalism, who cited Gizmodo, for every woman checking for messages there were over 13,800 men doing as much. Second, from Terrence Popp, for every ten thousand woen’s profiles, only three were real.
    Third, from someone who attended a convention in Las Vegas on internet dating, all these people wuld talk about was how to improve revenue. There was not one mention of hoe to provide a good product.

    It’s not in their interest to see their customers succeed. If they succeed, They no longer have them as customers.

    Liked by 4 people

  87. BuenaVista says:

    Women respond to the same things online that they do in the first class lounge at Narita. There’s no mystery to the medium.

    My suggestion is to have a quick phone call prior to making a date. Half will wash out in 3 mins.

    If they wash out, tho, watch what happens when you say “I guess we’re not a match. Too bad, you’re really hot.” Make sure there’s a password on your phone, it will shortly be crashing from a stream of amateur porn.

    Liked by 3 people

  88. BuenaVista says:

    I’m curious, apropos the cake mix stories, when we transitioned from men as respectable naifs (naive about cake mixes), to a culture of infantalizing ridicule. I think the early 90’s? (I.e. second wave feminism.)

    That stupid story in the NYT last week about the max beta modern male knowing how to buy women’s shoes comes to mind. Basically, from the perspective of the intelligentsia, the transition is complete.

    Liked by 2 people

  89. BuenaVista says:

    The only fake profiles on match or okc are obvious phishing exercises, with photos of Eastern euro cuties who don’t know how to use articles. They target older men who just want to be loved for who they truly are, deep down inside the misunderstood hearts.

    Like

  90. Yoda says:

    There was not one mention of hoe to provide a good product.

    Perhaps onto the solution you are.
    Hoes it would be

    Liked by 3 people

  91. Yoda says:

    Know this I did not.

    Hillary Clinton declared in a new interview that she is a robot, implying that humanity should despair and bend to her superior A.I. will by voting for her in the 2016 election

    http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2015/10/hillary-clinton-robot-sweat

    Liked by 2 people

  92. Yoda says:

    If Hillary a robot she is,
    wonder if Biden Jar-Jar’s brain he does have

    Liked by 4 people

  93. Spawny Get says:

    I’m not sure Biden does have Jar-Jar’s brain.

    Liked by 3 people

  94. Farm Boy says:

    Friend told me his most recent online date brought a friend with her. A real man hater then expected him to pay for all three of them.

    Was there a second date?

    Liked by 3 people

  95. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Farm Boy,
    I’ll bet that since the first date was such a success, the girls were very disappointed that there wasn’t another.
    That is one heck of a trick. It’s right up there with the same story that comes our of New York every two years by a different author-how internet dating crushed the food bill.
    The girls must think all men are chumps or something.

    Liked by 2 people

  96. Tarnished says:

    More than half of the trying-to-date guys I know have said that *none* of the women who’ve had dinner with them have helped to pay the bill, and very few of them even make a half-assed offer to.

    Even if you don’t believe in splitting the bill like I do, one could still make a nice, sincere sounding offer. Or heck, just pay the damn tip!

    Ugh. Talk about entitled. Makes me sick to my stomach…

    Liked by 3 people

  97. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    COTWA linked this and said it was one of Ashe Schow’s best.

    http://www.washingtonexaminer.com/4-questions-men-should-ask-when-searching-for-a-college/article/2573915#!

    From the article alone, campuses have become “hostile enviornments” for men and they should be afforded recourse under Title IX.

    Like

  98. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I don’t mind paying if the date is good company. Something tels me that your sources aren’t getting that. I think what we have is a situation where the gal presumes that she is doing the guy a favor by going out with him.
    It should be mutual.

    Like

  99. SFC Ton says:

    Yes darlings true story, yes the third wanted him to pay for her drinks. She was an educated woman you see…. ie bitch was broken with an attitude to ensure no one bought her drinks

    Farm boy, the girl he wanted to meet did text him, apologize for her friend’s behavior etc and set up a second date. However she quickly made it clear she wanted free entertainment. Friend dished out way to much time and cash on her because she was better looking than his norm. She was thin. And he is a beta so he “understood ” her friend was their to keep her safe and her desire to take things slow.

    Fuck that, 33 year old woman who wants to take it slow is running a con game. Dumb that bitch bang 10 more

    That’s how betas roll. I would have sat at the bar, ignored my “dates” and charmed the panties of the women around me

    Liked by 1 person

  100. SFC Ton says:

    Bad Fuzzie, bad, bad BAD Fuzzie. You are the prize and she needs to earn your time, earn your company and earn the right to your baby batter.

    If not, she is raneed higher then you and women don’t fuck down

    Liked by 1 person

  101. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    SFC Ton,
    I don’t know what that was in response to but, I am tired of coming in second place in a two horse race by lobbling myself. They got thwir jollies from “winning”. I hope that keeps them warm at night.

    Like

  102. SFC Ton says:

    It is regarding not minding paying for dates of the company was good. That attitude ensures the company will be marginal at best

    Liked by 1 person

  103. Tarnished says:

    I don’t mind paying if the date is good company.
    I don’t know, Fuzzie…that sounds like a nice sentiment, but nowadays would likely just get you taken advantage of.

    If we went on a date and you said “Tarn, you were wonderful company tonight, I’ll get the check”, I would honestly be equal parts flattered and amused. Flattered because it’s rare for anyone to bluntly say that and amused because I never think of my “company” as something with a monetary value. I’d insist on paying for my half, or secure a promise from you that I could pay the whole thing next time.

    Somehow I do not think many of the other potential dates you could have would see your kindness as anything more than what they “deserve”. Obviously it would be great to be proved wrong, but…

    Liked by 4 people

  104. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I thought that was why men should limit dating to women who’s interest increases. But, it is hard to know these things with certainty.

    I saw this over at Donal Graehme’s. I am worried.

    https://donalgraeme.wordpress.com/2015/10/12/good-guys-dont-exist/

    This SMP does not give good men a fair shot.

    Liked by 2 people

  105. Tarnished says:

    This isn’t new news, dear bear…
    *sad smile*

    Liked by 2 people

  106. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I am glad for you that you have FwB. I am not sure what to say to men who are spinning their wheels.

    Liked by 1 person

  107. Tarnished says:

    I am very glad too, Fuzzie. I do wish I could engage in casual sex though…there’s so many guys who could use some loving and physical affection. I managed to go through my entire last chiropractic session without needing to take a break from being touched though, so hooray! More progress! Baby steps…😄

    Liked by 2 people

  108. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    That is good news about your chiropractor. It has been a while. We are overdue for a bear video.

    Like

  109. Yoda says:

    Their education ineffective it would seem,

    The event is called “Cocks Not Glocks” so that should give you a clue of how ridiculous this protest is. The funny thing is the woman who is organizing the protest wants donations to pay for the sex toys. Why can’t these people pay for their own d*mn sex toy! Only a liberal would give the reason below for the protest because it’s so vague and flimsy with no concrete answer…just symbolism. Too funny:

    Jin told the Houston Chronicle in an interview that she chose the sex toy as “it spotlights the masturbatory nature of the power which people derive from gun ownership, and the self aggrandizing ‘I’m one of the good ones, I’ll protect you’ arguments we’re so often expected to simply trust.”

    University of Texas at Austin students plan to carry dildos around campus next year in protest of recent legislation that allows concealed carry permit holders to carry their firearms to public colleges’ campuses.

    http://100percentfedup.com/why-do-texas-students-plan-to-carry-sex-toys-to-protest-against-new-campus-carry-law/

    Liked by 2 people

  110. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Yoda,
    After reading your comment and not bothering with the link, I am beginning to think that feminists are going off the deep end. And they want other people to pay for their sex toys?

    Liked by 1 person

  111. SFC Ton says:

    Off purse feminist are off the deep end, they have no masculine leadership to keep them on track

    Liked by 1 person

  112. Liz says:

    From the link:
    ““The State of Texas has decided that it is not at all obnoxious to allow deadly concealed weapons in classrooms, however it does have strict rules about free sexual expression, to protect your innocence,” the event description reads. “You would receive a citation for taking a dildo to class before you would get in trouble for taking a gun to class. Heaven forbid the penis.”

    Weird how they seem to have forgotten every male student is wielding a penis. Or maybe not so weird…the better word is ‘telling’, I think.

    But, anyway, I guess they have no problem with penises now? When did this happen? Last time I heard, the girls were all traumatized by a mere statue of a man sleepwalking in his underwear.

    Liked by 1 person

  113. Liz says:

    From Pimpin’
    “Dem bitches say they want a dick
    So I’ll teach ’em a little trick.
    I will get me a piece,
    then shutter, release,
    while they hold onto my selfie stick.”

    Yes, this would go over well I think….

    Liked by 1 person

  114. Tarnished says:

    Yoda,

    Well that’s bizarre, to say the least. Also rather greedy…one could buy a plain, non-vibrating dildo for about $30 or so. If one is going to supposedly be “morally” invested in a protest, they can’t even invest 30 bucks to obtain the protestation prop? Donations for them to carry around fake penises…now I’ve seen everything.
    *shakes head*

    Liked by 1 person

  115. Liz says:

    I’d be more afraid of a stinky feminist’s used dildo than a gun.

    Liked by 1 person

  116. Liz says:

    I’d like to throw some used condoms and incubated vaginosis petri dishes their way.
    If I get a club shaped dildo and hit them with it, is that considered a weapon, or just freedom of personal expression?

    Liked by 2 people

  117. Liz says:

    I meant a dildo shaped club…..
    How about a dildo shaped gun?

    Liked by 2 people

  118. Liz says:

    I’m sure I could make a compelling case that I was just protecting myself from the potential of getting a case of crotch rot I’d never be able to get rid of. Hence, self defense.

    Liked by 2 people

  119. Liz says:

    Fuck them. I seriously would beat the shit out of any skank I saw brandishing a fucking dildo in public, as a germophobe.

    Liked by 2 people

  120. Tarnished says:

    By the Gods, Liz…I didn’t even think of that possibility! I’d assumed that any sex toys being toted around in public would necessarily be unused/never intended to be more than a out-of-the-package prop. Used for the protest, then hastily disposed of.

    Now I’m thinking along your lines and feel a bit ill…

    Liked by 2 people

  121. Liz says:

    You are right to feel ill, Tarn. Be very afraid.

    Liked by 2 people

  122. Tarnished says:

    *goes and hides in a corner to safely watch bear videos*

    Liked by 1 person

  123. Spawny Get says:

    If you loved Lock, Stock and Two Smokin’ Barrels…you’ll probably like this one quite a lot

    Watched it last night. Not bad at all (British Understatement, by Jove). Not as good as Lockstock or Snatch, but…yeah.

    Liked by 1 person

  124. Spawny Get says:

    For those with a ridiculous sense of the ridiculous (Tarn), have you seen this one?
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3416742

    Watching it now. I’ve LOLed a couple of times already. The trailer doesn’t do it justice IMHO

    Liked by 1 person

  125. Spawny Get says:

    It’s another Kiwi film that I bet Cill hasn’t seen yet. Prolly Molly too.

    Liked by 1 person

  126. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    This all got me to thinking about Moehau Man and his Kauri club. He’s be open carrying it so it wouldn’t enter into the argument.

    I am surprised that the protesters didn’t expect the federal government to pick up the tab for the props.

    Tarn,
    Here’s another. Let’s go to the zoo and visit the small humans. They’re funny!

    Liked by 2 people

  127. Tarnished says:

    Spawny,
    Yes! I love this movie!

    Fuzzie,
    I think if we visit a zoo, they’re likely to give you pic-a-nic baskets. You’re a very nice bear. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  128. Yoda says:

    New post there is.

    Like

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