Too Much Complexity — Too Little Knowledge


There is much complexity in the world today.  Complexity that the average person often has difficulty navigating.  This is particularly true in male-female relationships.  In my grandparent’s day, much of the Patriarchy still existed as well as strong churches.  They provided simple easy to follow guidance.  Things like marry young, love your spouse, wives follow the husbands lead, husbands work to be the breadwinner, women handle hearth and home, wives provide supplementary income if possible, wives support their husband’s career, etc.  This was not particularly difficult to understand, my ancestors followed it, and things worked out rather well for them.

Now consider today.  Women have options.  So many options that they get paralyzed.  Their guidance on navigating through these options is mostly worthless.  Their base model upon which they reason about these issues is useless also.  Many don’t even particularly try, as they expect that they are entitled to good things flowing their way, primarily because the were told that was how it should be.

For men, the situation is almost more bleak.  They have their own set of unique problems, but they do not have the government subsidizing them and clearing the path in front of them as modern women do.  Fellas are still expected to work and pay taxes.  They are given no good path to success with women.  Perhaps the only well defined path to success is to polish your bad-boy cred and knock up some women.  In times past, a man could build up career and other successes in order to get the girl.  Today, such an approach is hit or miss.  Perhaps one cannot blame men for taking a pass on it.

There are many to blame for this situation, and we mostly know who they are.  Most people do not want the complexity of the modern world.  It was better for most when there were well defined paths to success (with provisions for those who do not fit those paths to operate otherwise).  What can be done?

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Posted in FarmBoy, Lies, Marriage
118 comments on “Too Much Complexity — Too Little Knowledge
  1. blurkel says:

    Perhaps one cannot blame men for taking a pass on it.

    PERHAPS???

    Liked by 1 person

  2. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    SFC Ton hates it when I promote these guys. The upside is that they give you a whole new identity on enlistment. Men deserve a second chance. Get to Paris and show up at the gate in the beginning of the video.

    Then, again, I may be a nineteenth century romantic.

    Like

  3. Mrs. Yoda says:

    Bears get romantic they do?
    so sweet this is.

    Like

  4. Yoda says:

    PERHAPS???

    Famous British Understatement this is.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. SFC Ton says:

    Ineffective war fighters unless they are full of German war criminals

    Like

  6. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I have to wonder how much of that can be explained by what Norman Schwartzkopf referred to as the white linen tablecloth effect? When Erwin Rommel got to Africa, he had no problem leading Italians. At that time, Germans could not advance beyond Captain without proving themselves capable of commanding a company of infantry.

    Mrs. Yoda,
    Yes, we do. *sniff**honk*

    Liked by 1 person

  7. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Mrs.Yoda,
    Here is a better answer to your question. Words are unnecessary.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Many seem to think that more options and choices lead to happiness and fulfillment but studies show the opposite, given more options/choices often leads to analysis pyralysis and constant second guessing if one made the “right” choice or not. More is often not better.

    Liked by 4 people

  9. Liz says:

    “given more options/choices often leads to analysis pyralysis and constant second guessing if one made the “right” choice or not. More is often not better.”
    Yes, there are many ways to look at this from an individual perspective, group perspective, (society, personal finance, the economy, geopolitics and so forth).

    Unfortunately, it isn’t just a matter of complexity of choice either, it’s that coupled with the fact that many things which are immediately profitable for an individual are not beneficial to society at large, longterm (or even ultimately that individual who immediately profits).

    Fraud is more immediately profitable than long-term social investment. And political soundbites/wishes can be far more persuasive on a limbic level (and we’re all animals) than reality and results.

    Liked by 4 people

  10. Liz says:

    There’s really too much to say on this topic, thinking further. Consider that choice itself can ultimately lead to NO choice. Small example, the Chinese (the world’s equivalent of Walmart) cornered the market on solar panels by subsidizing the industry. The US made the best (military issue only), Chinese made about the worst, but they sent all the other businesses under. There are security implications to this too. During WWII the US almost brought German industrial production to a halt by bombing the ball bearing factories in Schweinfurt Germany. Today, American industrial production depends on parts made overseas that could be simply cut off. This is not just an American problem.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Liz says:

    Anecdotally, there was something actually kind of comforting about when Mike was active duty instead of Reserve. In active duty you basically don’t have a choice, they tell you. The Reserve is all about choices. This was very strange at first, getting to decide where we would go and how long we want to be here. Of course it’s better than moving five times in four years (as projected), but I found I was more productive and much more organized then. We just had to do it, so we did.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Farm Boy says:

    Most everybody who posts comments on this site is an NT. They deal with complexity well. But they are a small minority, and the other types are not so complexity oriented. So, for the average person, lots of complexity in operating in daily life is not good. Is this how we want to organize society?

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Farm Boy says:

    Liz points out an important point that seems to be lost on society, that behaviors that might be advantageous in the short run, are often disadvantageous in the long run. They really need to be discourages, yet in many cases they are encouraged.

    What kind of stupidity is this?

    Liked by 3 people

  14. Farm Boy says:

    So what would be some modern day templates around which people could organize their lives?

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Liz says:

    What would be the solution that would make modern society less complex, FB?

    Like

  16. Liz says:

    Heh, we posted at the same time. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Liz says:

    OT. (sort of)
    I’m slow so it took me a while, but I’m starting to become convinced that the sole reason Insanity’s blog exists is to heckle the sphere.
    There sure are a lot of blog “choices” out there, just within the (supposedly) anti-feminist sphere alone. And many are pretty hostile toward each other.
    That’s kind of an example of ‘sound bite-ism’ too. If one doesn’t know the context and is
    “empowered” by partial information only, it’s easy to make the wrong choice and think he or she has made a careful assessment of the facts, which they have, but it’s only a portion of the facts. That’s just within the sphere alone.
    When this is applied to other things, complexity can make it really be difficult or even virtually impossible to make an informed assessment. None of us is an expert on all matters, and the vast majority of us are only given partial information on which to base those assessments (politics, healthcare, yadda yadda).

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Liz says:

    “So what would be some modern day templates around which people could organize their lives?”

    Disincentivize the framework that empowers a system that socializes costs while privatizing gain. This is much easier on a small scale (politics are local, as they say).

    Liked by 2 people

  19. Farm Boy says:

    Insanity’s blog

    Exactly which blog is this?

    Like

  20. Farm Boy says:

    Disincentivize the framework that empowers a system that socializes costs while privatizing gain.

    Yes, this makes sense. Can anybody legitimately argue with this? Can hamsters argue with this?

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Liz says:

    And “anti-feminist” person. She has trolled Rollos and came across very poorly. But some of her stuff (at the actual blog) is interesting and reasonable. But over time I’m starting to form other conclusions.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Farm Boy says:

    Can hamsters argue with this?

    “It’s for the chilllllldrennnn”

    Like

  23. Farm Boy says:

    I did not know that she had a blog. Rollo suspects that she trolls for tingles. Tingle Uber Alles

    Liked by 2 people

  24. Farm Boy says:

    Disincentivize the framework that empowers a system that socializes costs while privatizing gain.

    I have a nephew with a worthless degree who has $70K in student loan debt.

    His solution: Vote for Bernie Sanders

    Liked by 2 people

  25. Liz says:

    “I have a nephew with a worthless degree who has $70K in student loan debt.

    His solution: Vote for Bernie Sanders”

    This exactly.

    FWIW, this blogger (after reading and careful behavior analysis drawn from years of observing how people operate) is acting almost precisely like I did when I was on birth control pills.

    Like

  26. Liz says:

    Re the trillion dollar student loan crisis, sitting down with a calculator and employing third grade math skills could have foreseen this. But knowledge isn’t the force that is driving all this. And the “educated” know this. They aren’t stupid enough to buy the snake oil they are selling. What is driving it all is the same sort of thing that makes people send money to Nigerian princes.

    Liked by 3 people

  27. Yoda says:

    The nephew’s degree in Philosophy Farm Boy tells me he does

    Like

  28. Yoda says:

    is acting almost precisely like I did when I was on birth control pills.

    Write a post about this you should.
    This is something men understand not

    Like

  29. Liz says:

    “Write a post about this you should.
    This is something men understand not”

    You start with something that you might be right to disagree with and/or find fault in. Magnify this in your own mind to be 100 times worse than it actually is and proceed accordingly.
    Also employ conflicting thoughts…like “all I want is for someone to tell me I’m special” followed quickly after by “I don’t care what anyone thinks!”
    Wash rinse repeat, allow for little to no personal self awareness/reflection.
    That’s basically it in a nutshell.

    Liked by 3 people

  30. Liz says:

    I realize the above describes an awful lot of women…

    Liked by 3 people

  31. Yoda says:

    Still write detailed post you should

    Liked by 2 people

  32. Yoda says:

    Hormones strong they are

    Like

  33. SFC Ton says:

    I’m still waiting on an explanation of how women value commitment and loyalty in men. Or one that matches observational reality.

    For many people, the short term option is the wise position to take. This is .more true lower down the food chain. Economics have a term for it and everything but basically you have to have faith in long term integrity of something to make the long term play. Such faith seem foolish to me.

    People make their life complex. Get up to speed on Proverbs, live them out and you are good to go. It’s only complex when you are trying to control people, things, systems etc beyond your ability to effect.

    Liked by 2 people

  34. Yoda says:

    people make their life complex.

    Life simple on Degoba it is.
    No “keeping up with the Jones” there is.
    Because Jones there are not.

    Like

  35. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    SFC Ton,
    I can’t answer that. I don’t have direct knowledge. All that I can say is that it is working for Liz.

    As for women in this little corner of the internet, there are two positive reasons. One, they are searching for answers. The standard line isn’t working for them. Then, two, being feminine, they have a natural affinity for the masculine, even if it is only words on a screen.
    As for the one in question, I don’t know her well enough to offer an opinion.

    Like

  36. Yoda says:

    Even if in long term one believes not,
    positive middle-term behaviors one should have.

    Liked by 1 person

  37. Liz says:

    Ton “I’m still waiting on an explanation of how women value commitment and loyalty in men. Or one that matches observational reality.”

    I’ve explained how I value it.
    Do uncommited relationships last longer? There is plenty of observable reality to go by there. Ghetto culture in particular would be an observable a manifestation of the uncommited short term reality.

    Like

  38. Liz says:

    I do agree with commitment is disincentivized now (also an observable reality in ghetto culture).

    Liked by 1 person

  39. Yoda says:

    Lots of options opens door to “grass greener” effect it does.
    Mostly greener grass there is not.
    Discover this too late people do.

    Like

  40. Yoda says:

    Even if operate on “grass greener” one does not,
    endless lamenting mess up their life it does.

    Like

  41. Yoda says:

    Men understand that life not optimal it is.
    Women seem to understand not

    Liked by 1 person

  42. Liz says:

    “Lots of options opens door to “grass greener” effect it does.
    Mostly greener grass there is not.
    Discover this too late people do.”

    People also only get a partial glimpse of that “greener grass”. It could be a little green patch in an otherwise brown square acre covered in dog poo.
    Look at all the children born from famous people who would seem to have every advantage in the world and look how messed up they usually are.

    Liked by 3 people

  43. Yoda says:

    square acre covered in dog poo

    Poor analogy this is.
    Next year very green this will be.

    Liked by 3 people

  44. BuenaVista says:

    I don’t think life or life’s meaning is ‘complex.’

    Take away the noise of consumerism and politics, confront your mortality, suddenly it’s all very simple.

    But sure, if you want to swim in the consumerist-political deep end, it’s a secular hell. My question about that: Who cares?

    Liked by 3 people

  45. Yoda says:

    if you want to swim in the consumerist-political deep end

    But people realize that there is an alternative not.

    Like

  46. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I think the “grass is greener” is not a problem for a lot of men since they live in a desert. I can see how this would exacerbate the problem for women.

    Liked by 1 person

  47. Liz says:

    Here’s one:
    Commitment. If women didn’t value it, would men do it?

    Like

  48. “I’m still waiting on an explanation of how women value commitment and loyalty in men. Or one that matches observational reality.”

    I am not sure what you are asking here Ton, or who you are asking, but I’ll take a stab at it. Women could learn a lot from men about commitment and loyalty, which as rollo explains are not natural female traits because of the unique set of issues women face historically (women were largely chattel, arranged marriage, sold into marriage, in times of instability one might be kidnapped or forced into marriage, etc. loyalty and commitment don’t serve well under those conditions, fluidity does.) then w today’s social norms, women are encouraged to pursue serial monogamy or even outright do whoever whenever w no social consequence. Where before divorce largely wasn’t an option (but it did happen) so while it may seem women were once more loyal or committed it is really because there wasn’t an option to be otherwise wo huge social status fall out. I guess I have asked myself which is better, to be married and committed/loyal to one or to be a SIW and I would say marriage is the far better way to go. And not just married, but happily married, bringing the happy and knowing how to be a good wife sho is a helpmate, not a self absorbed burden. Serial monogamy is inherently unstable, not to mention it just gets old after awhile, the starting over. There is a comfort in truly committed and loyal relationships, they are deeply and profoundly satisfying when done well in a way short term doesn’t have. When I see two little old people hobbling along and holding each other up, that’s really beautiful. When two truly do become one. I’ll admit it’s rare, but I would consider that a pinnacle relationship experience – true life mates.

    Liked by 3 people

  49. Or maybe you are asking how women value commitment and loyalty in men, as a male quality? Well I think many women take it for granted that men will always be there to help, just like her dad was. So yes the majority of women just assume this entitlement to male commitment and loyalty, not seeing what a rare and wonderful gift it is from man to woman. Women would be wise to push themselves to emulate that commitment and loyalty in return. It’s one of the best male qualities there is, commitment and loyalty. And in many ways drives men not only in love, but war, commerce, life. It’s honorable. It’s noble. And it is vastly under appreciated, by women.

    Liked by 4 people

  50. And in some cases, such as blurkel describes, it’s taken advantage of by women.

    Liked by 4 people

  51. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Bloom,
    In Blurkel’s case, and so many others, it’s distorted and converted into a weapon used to harm men.
    It may not be rare but, you are right to say that it is wonderful. We could not survive as a species without paternal investment.

    Liked by 1 person

  52. @ fuzzie did you mean could not? I think you are missing the not.

    Liked by 1 person

  53. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Bloom,
    You’re right. I did miss that when I proof read.
    We could not have survived as a species without paternal investment. And Hillary can take her “it takes a village” and stick it where the sun does not shine.

    Liked by 3 people

  54. Yoda says:

    We could not have survived as a species without paternal investment. And Hillary can take her “it takes a village” and stick it where the sun does not shine.

    Wednesday’s post addresses this it will

    Like

  55. Re hill@ry, several staunch dems I know, both women, feel the same about her, as do I. I don’t think she’d be the slam dunk they are looking for

    Liked by 1 person

  56. Liz says:

    I think that men are more likely to honor their commitments once those commitments are made.
    I do not beleive that men in general actively seek out exclusive commitment and “value” it like women do. Men don’t fantasize about their wedding tuxedo from their formative years. It just isn’t even on their radar. And it shouldn’t be. It’s seldom the man who wants to marry more than the woman. That’s a very recent and modern-day paradigm.

    Like

  57. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Bloom,
    You reminded me of her chief weakness-she polarizes people. Good leadership unifies.

    Liz,
    Along with commitment, there is duty. We all grow up want to be astronauts. We put aside those ambitions.

    Liked by 1 person

  58. Yoda says:

    “I’m still waiting on an explanation of how women value commitment and loyalty in men. Or one that matches observational reality.”

    Fantasize about fancy weddings and shit they do.
    In fact they like commitment so much that time and again do it they want.

    Liked by 1 person

  59. SFC Ton says:

    As I said there is no evidence to suggest women at large value commitment. That many not be true as a statement regarding any single woman but is true about women. Value security masculine commitment provides? Perhaps. The man himself? Only if he is alpha enough. Such is the nature of the world

    Women fantasize about being the center of attention during a marriage ceremony. It’s an off shot about their natural inclination for attention whoring.

    Most men do want/ value the commitment. If for no other reason then most men cannot get laid otherwise. But women are a burden to men in a way men do nit burden women. So they are in fact reluctant to take up the burden, wanting the smallest/essayist burden possible for the best ROI on their commitment investment. B.s.

    This has been an excellent example of feminine protection

    Liked by 1 person

  60. SFC Ton says:

    Hillary will be potus unless trump runs. Otherwise the non existent gop base will have no reason to vote and the dnc will do a better job of rallying its various outraged/ minority victim groups.

    Like

  61. Liz says:

    “Women fantasize about being the center of attention during a marriage ceremony. It’s an off shot about their natural inclination for attention whoring.”

    This is true, but if it were only attention whoring it wouldn’t be a fantasy about the day they commit to someone for life (theoretically). They could have any other attention whoring fantasy, but this one is pretty key, so I think there’s a bit more to it than that.

    Like

  62. Liz says:

    “This has been an excellent example of feminine protection”

    How so Ton?

    Like

  63. SFC Ton says:

    They are lubed up over the attention, status and resources spent on them not about the commitment. If it was about the commitment the other stuff wouldn’t be required.

    You value commitment so think women do when all evidence points otherwise. Not to mention the lack of understanding on the masculine side of things

    Liked by 1 person

  64. Yoda says:

    The state assures commitment of the man it does.

    Like

  65. Liz says:

    Hm. Thanks for the response, Ton.
    It’s true I can only speak from my own experience.
    Fiwiw, It is also Mike’s impression that men typically marry only to lock a woman down they want to keep, because the woman is the one who wants the commitment.

    Like

  66. Yoda says:

    They could have any other attention whoring fantasy, but this one is pretty key, so I think there’s a bit more to it than that.

    But other fantasy they have with others footing the bill they can?

    Like

  67. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    In fairness to Liz, I think she values commitment but, it’s all part of the total package that her husband brought to the table. Now, those cackling hens that BV mentioned yeseterday, they don’t but, they are dependent on it.

    Liked by 1 person

  68. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Yoda,
    “The state assures comittment of the man it does.”
    All the responsibility and obligation.

    Liked by 1 person

  69. Yoda says:

    Many women value commitment not.
    Because told that better they do deserve.
    But on average true this is not.

    Appreciative they should be

    Like

  70. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Yoda,
    To show appreciation, the making of sandwiches good would be.
    Even better, before hungry know that we are.

    Liked by 1 person

  71. Yoda says:

    http://www.dailycamera.com/guest-opinions/ci_28837636/stan-garnett-shadow-campus-system-is-no-solution

    Although universities adjudicate student discipline, it is a serious mistake to equate investigation and resolution of felony sex assault with cheating on a test or drinking or smoking in a dorm room or the other normal fodder of the university discipline process, where due process on some level is important, but of an entirely different quality than the criminal justice system provides.

    We should never tolerate the adjudication of serious felony behavior outside the criminal justice system. There are many reasons:

    1. The risk of wrongful conviction is too great. The rigorous due process of the criminal justice system exists for mainly one reason: to make sure society can have confidence that one who is found guilty is, in fact, guilty. Relaxing due process, or having investigations not handled by well-trained professionals can lead to wrongful conviction.

    2. The risk of traumatizing victims of sex assault. Interview and handling of victims and witnesses in sex crimes requires skill, sensitivity and time. Clumsy or repeated interviews can be traumatic for victims.

    3. Those guilty of serious felony behavior present a societal risk, not just a campus risk. To suggest that sex assault on campus is primarily a campus problem is just plain wrong: it is a societal problem and deserves a societal response through the criminal justice system.

    4. The criminal justice system is public and the public can observe, evaluate and criticize the proceedings. University conduct investigations carry the inherent secrecy of the discipline process, which can leave the public questioning the fairness of an investigation and the accuracy of the determinations.

    The federal government’s decision to tie campus funding to a one size fits all investigative approach can interfere with criminal investigations. Fair, effective, sex assault investigations take time and cannot be handled by investigators under pressure to rush to a particular conclusion due to financial pressures on the university. Also, “warning letters” or warning bulletins, or campus-based “stay away from each other” orders can, if issued prematurely, prevent law enforcement from determining the truth of alleged criminal behavior.

    Like

  72. BuenaVista says:

    If women were the committers, instead of the de-committers, they wouldn’t be the majority cause of family detonation. The laws wouldn’t be written to reward their de-committing. Which seems pretty obvious.

    It’s only getting worse as our culture assigns status to female perpetual victimization. So more women detonate their families while claiming enhanced victimization (“he was abusive, he was emotionally moribund, he was financially inept, he wasn’t Brad Pitt”).

    The divorcee I was making out with last night by the lake, since we’re making broad generalizations on the basis of our singular lives, was married for … six months. She decided she could do better, bought herself an Escalade, and punched out because … he was an (three guesses) addict. She never noticed while they were dating and planning the wedding on a beach 1500 miles away.

    If women were such commitment machines they would stay married and walk the talk of their interest in careers (i.e., not check out, fully or in part, of the workforce by 40).

    Liked by 3 people

  73. @ Liz yes I would agree w the thought men don’t desire commitment until/unless they meet the specific woman he would commit to. I have seen this w couples several times, shortly after meeting they just “know.”

    Like

  74. BuenaVista says:

    I’ll regret this but …

    “Liz yes I would agree w the thought men don’t desire commitment until/unless they meet the specific woman he would commit to.”

    Bloom, that’s a tautology. “Men don’t commit until they see an object worthy of commitment.” Duh.

    Another way to put it is that “Men don’t commit on demand by women.”

    Perhaps men are warier of commitment because they take the concept more seriously. And women are not as wary because they have little to lose if they decide to change their mind after a few months.

    I agree that some men, obviously, simply won’t marry now, because of how women and society have destroyed marriage for the majority of men and children. But that’s not a commentary on male “commitment” preferences; that’s a commentary on male survival instincts.

    Liked by 3 people

  75. Liz says:

    It did not occur to me that I was being controversial. I’ve already stated that men are more likely to honor their commitments.
    It’s been pretty standard theme that women try to rope men into marriage, and men are the more resistant. It’s a Wonderful Life, I Love Lucy, Lil’ Abner, the Donna Reed show, the whole meme “Men are the gatekeepers of commitment” (Heartiste maybe?).

    I thought it was for the very fact that they (men) are taking on a large burden. But, I guess it isn’t so. My bad.

    Liked by 1 person

  76. Liz says:

    “Perhaps men are warier of commitment because they take the concept more seriously. And women are not as wary because they have little to lose if they decide to change their mind after a few months.”

    I didn’t see this post until after I posted.
    I think that’s very likely.
    I actually think that is the case…but that would mean men are more wary of commitment, and I don’t want to get cyber spanked or anger anyone (again).

    Liked by 1 person

  77. Farm Boy says:

    It did not occur to me that I was being controversial.

    This is a sensitive topic for men. It touches raw nerves. Always expect a strong reaction.

    Liked by 2 people

  78. Farm Boy says:

    A new post there is.

    Like

  79. Liz says:

    Thanks Farm Boy.
    I really did not intend to offend or anger anyone and I’m very sorry. 😦

    Liked by 2 people

  80. BuenaVista says:

    Liz, my perspective is that *entering* commitment is profoundly different than *honoring* commitment. My impression is that women are disturbed at the caution men display *entering* commitments; since *honoring* those commitments can be all-consuming for a man, and a woman has one-way options to jettison the commitments she makes (to her financial and social reward), it seems quite normal to me that guys are careful. We have to cash the checks we write. Women don’t. We can’t mix up entering and honoring. Chicks do.

    ***

    So this old farmer buddy and I are on the outs because he reneged on something important. There is no dispute between us that he reneged. He’s a self-sacrificing, modest, married Christian. He nearly had a meltdown when I advised him that he had failed in multiple commitments, and I used that very word. It hurt him badly because he knows I am right.

    Commitment may mean something different to a man than a woman these days (I’m not attempting omniscience). Commitment for a man is extremely expensive spiritually, emotionally, financially, and sexually. Another way to put this is that there is no Eat Pray Love (For Men!) or 50 Shades of Pegging (For Men!). I don’t think the word commitment, in the mainstream, means the same thing to men and women any longer.

    ***

    Lizzie, I was neither spanking you nor angry; nor were you “controversial.” Surely we have enough in the bank to firmly disagree.

    I have a theory about all online communities. (I participate in a few like this and a few sports blogs.) The theory is that they all devolve to an enforced ‘in-group’ – ‘out-group’ dynamic. Then they are either useless (Roosh, Return of Kings) or they implode (J4G). Just for the record, I value dispute and discussion over saccharine accord, and I admire you very, very much.

    Liked by 2 people

  81. Liz says:

    Oh squee! I’m so glad you aren’t mad at me. 🙂

    I would send a cyber hug but I know you don’t like hugs. 😛

    Liked by 2 people

  82. BuenaVista says:

    I’m online to learn and discuss and challenge and be challenged, sweetie. Not to circle consensus.

    And right. No hugs unless we’re shortly moving on to kisses and feels.

    Liked by 1 person

  83. Yoda says:

    A hug a “feel” it would be?

    Like

  84. Liz says:

    On the subject of online communities, this is a pretty fun site (flame warriors, created by Mike Reed):
    http://www.flamewarriorsguide.com

    It’s a listing with descriptions/illustrations of a variety of typical discussion board participants. Very funny stuff. On my old political discussion site (back in band camp) we had a thread where we identified which ones we felt applied to us. In order to prevent our own flame war from breaking out, we just stuck to self-identification.

    Like

  85. BuenaVista says:

    No, Yoda. If I’m hugging, my hands are getting busy.

    Otherwise, I hug my Dad and my children, full stop.

    Like

  86. Yoda says:

    One not always with their hands do feel

    Like

  87. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    The Foorce is all around us and in us.

    Like

  88. Yoda says:

    The Foorce is all around us and in us.

    And shittles in us they would be.

    Like

  89. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    You have skittles?
    Can I come over?

    Like

  90. SFC Ton says:

    Didn’t know anyone is angry with Liz but I volunteered to spank her…..

    Liked by 1 person

  91. I also did not mean to offend, I get what you are saying bv and I agree. Men do honor commitment more. Sure there are some who don’t, but in general I see men sticking out some fairly unsatisfying relationships/marriages out of commitment far far far more often than women. Men don’t seem to flap around in the emotional/feels wind like women do. Our minds work completely differently.

    Liked by 2 people

  92. Farm Boy says:

    Ton,

    Would you spank Lena Dunham?

    Liked by 1 person

  93. For men, commitment seems like a decision made once, it’s their word. For women commitment is precariously based on feelings, which can cycle rapidly and change multiple times daily. I guess it’s sort of like a marriage based on arrangement (a “deal” that doesn’t change) vs. a marriage based on love and attraction (which can change)? Add to that the legal climate and yes it’s true women are more likely to, or are even encouraged to, break their commitment. Unless she’s smart enough or has learned the hard way that the chances of starting over and doing better are actually very slim, things far more often get worse for women after they break a commitment, sometimes much much worse. Of those men here who were frivorced, how many of your ex’s truly went on to be better off? I bet none. That’s what women should keep in mind when feels start whispering “greener grass” in her ear.

    Liked by 2 people

  94. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Farm Boy,
    I don’t know if that would help Lena Dunham but, Charlotte Proudman in front of the Old Bailey wearing her wig and robe would be a good candidate. There is the matter of 458GBP in old parking tickets.

    Bloom,
    It would be good to hear that . I don’t think women end up better off but, they’ll be too stubborn to admit it.

    Liked by 2 people

  95. blurkel says:

    Is this how we want to organize society?

    Unless your bank account balance shows 12 digits, you ain’t never going to belong to “we”. It’s all about ensuring income for those who will never live long enough to spend it.

    Liked by 1 person

  96. Liz says:

    “I don’t know if that would help Lena Dunham but, Charlotte Proudman in front of the Old Bailey wearing her wig and robe would be a good candidate.”

    That white wig the Brits use? That isn’t an erotic image at all, Fuzzie.
    Seems almost as bad as Lena Dunham 😛
    I think I just had a brainstorm though….I called it on matress girl and porn, it will be Proudman next. Not porn, but she’ll be in an issue of Playboy or Penthouse or some equivalent very soon (before people forget who she is).

    “It would be good to hear that . I don’t think women end up better off but, they’ll be too stubborn to admit it.”

    I’ve never (to my knowledge) met a woman who was better off (in any way, but especially financially) after frivorcing. And I’ve known quite a few.

    Liked by 2 people

  97. SFC Ton says:

    I lost the divorce assets split battle in spectacular fashion

    I have most def won the post divorce life. In every possible way

    Spank the cow? Naw but I do have a horse whip…..

    Like

  98. SFC Ton says:

    Has to be said I did the divorcing though

    Like

  99. Yoda says:

    Wonder if Lena respond to Skittles she would.

    Like

  100. Yoda says:

    On Degoba our own special Skittles we do have.
    “Flavors of the Swamp” popular it would be.
    Mrs. Yoda likes them she does,
    but a Skittles Girl she is not.

    Like

  101. Women would be wise to think about how it usually works out. But one I have been trying to get to see this for quite awhile is still thinking she’s the special snowflake who will EPL and end up better off. Not. Yesterday, After she told him its over-over her hubby started looking
    for work and housing half the country away, where he would much rather have always lived. She contacted me in a panic only to hear, “well, if he’s not going to be married, why not?” She was fit to be tied. “How dare he!!!” I wondered if it was dread game myself… 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  102. Liz says:

    God, what a bitch.

    Like

  103. SFC Ton says:

    It was dread game. She wants to keep him in her orbit for various reasons, none of which are good for him

    Like

  104. It was so classic red pill, right away she was wailing, “but what about the children???” I calmly explained that once she divorced him, she would no longer have any influence over his life voices and that it was SHE who was opening that door. He’d rather be married. SHE would be doing that to the children, and her decision would blow up life as they know it and things would never be the same again. Yep. Be careful what you wish for.

    And I know she sounds horrid, but really I think she’s just daft. She’s buying EPL culture to the max.

    Liked by 1 person

  105. I keep trying to tell her, if she does this her life is going to suck in ways she’s never known and cannot comprehend. To that she usually replies, “why can’t you just support meeee?” I tell her I can’t because I know what is ahead that she can’t see. Still she seeks my counsel and for some reason my not approving (delivered w love and empathy) seems to have influence.

    Liked by 1 person

  106. Liz says:

    She probably is daft. But she has already done irreparable damage to her family.

    Liked by 2 people

  107. Liz says:

    Just to highlight what I mean above:
    If he stays, he’s living with a woman who wanted to divorce him for insignificant reasons. She is disloyal, it doesn’t matter terribly much that her disloyality is from stupidity not malice. Her kids know this too, I’m sure. This puts them in a position where they don’t feel secure.

    Liked by 2 people

  108. Liz says:

    I need some comic relief. Gah! this is depressing stuff.

    Like

  109. Absolutely Liz. She’s creating the train wreck for everyone! And nobody else wants to go along for the ride 😦 she thinks by leaving all the drama and angst will go away and her kids would prefer “two happy homes over one unhappy one.” But she’s wrong. I told her kids want a family, not two happy homes.

    Liked by 2 people

  110. I am sorry, I agree it’s way too heavy. I’d tell a joke but the only ones I can ever remember are so inappropriate I don’t dare repeat them!

    Like

  111. Liz says:

    From Pimpin’
    Chapter 10, Parenthood.

    “Leroy was suspended from preschool for chewing his poptart into a gun.
    I said, “Leroy…i’ve got somethin’ for their ass!”
    Now Bashiqua ho and Shaniqua ho and their five babies are busy chewin’ up poptart zombies.
    Those bitches ‘ll be wantin’ that gun now!”

    Liked by 1 person

  112. http://jokes.cc.com/

    Joke of the day

    How are air and sex the same?

    Nobody cares about them until they aren’t getting any!

    Liked by 2 people

  113. Liz says:

    Oh, yeah! Thanks Bloom. 😀

    Like

  114. Liz says:

    More Pimpin’

    “The next week, Leroy tried to chew a brownie into the shape of a tank! I said he was set up, but there were bite marks all over her thighs.”

    Liked by 1 person

  115. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    If he stays, he’s living with a woman who wanted to divorce him for insignificant reasons. She is disloyal, it doesn’t matter terribly much that her disloyality is from stupidity not malice.

    Very true.

    Q: What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
    A: You can unscrew the lightbulb.

    Liked by 3 people

  116. Yoda says:

    thinking she’s the special snowflake who will EPL and end up better off.

    Why women always think “special snowflake” they are?

    Like

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