Bride and Prejudice


Have you ever wondered how a woman sees you, Bro? What she’s looking at, and how that vision appeals to her? Despite what we might want them to see, they really don’t care as much about how we look as how they will benefit from keeping us around – and whether you are worth the sex that will require.

One of my Bucket List goals is to leave behind a warning to young men regarding their interactions with women, and to understand how they are kept ignorant about the motives of the women who entice them with (generally) empty promises in an attempt to trade Something (lifetime economic support) for Nothing (“sex anytime you want it!”). My mate Cill said he was going to use some of my comments from my last post in his attempts to aid the effort with young men he knows. I thought it might be wise to add to the knowledge base.

Your looks ARE important in attracting her attention in the first place, but she quickly shifts into evaluating two things about you: how ambitious you are, and how much you are likely to earn. Both usually have to rate highly as this is what determines your status, something upon which women place great importance. The higher her economic and social status, the fewer men who qualify in meeting her standards and who are to be allowed a sniff of the Golden Vagina. And for too many, that is the extent of the sex you will likely receive once the honeymoon ends if not prior.

Let’s say you are out, and you see some young hottie who clearly holds high standards about her value -and maybe merits them- preening herself before an Alpha Bad Boy, only he negs her and rejects her. Is that your opening to approach her? Not according to Geoff MacDonald of the University of Toronto! In a study published in Social Psychological and Personality Science, he found that you are only looking to get your balls crushed:

Rejection by an attractive man actually led women to socially distance themselves from [someone she sees as] an unattractive man, even when he offered acceptance….A possible reason for this effect, MacDonald says, is that “being affiliated with an unattractive man would make those women feel like that’s the kind of man they ‘deserve,’ [i.e., she’s not as high status as she tried and failed to be] which puts their larger social goals at risk.”

No Sir Galahad rescuing the damsel in distress for you, Sancho Panza! So how do you avoid the hurt and public pain this embarrassing error will cause you?

In the Art of War, Sun-Tzu advises that “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles“, yet young men throughout history have not known nearly enough about women before engaging with them. The resultant scars are numerous. Women count on this male ignorance, for it provides the advantage they need to conquer a man and take everything he has for herself and any offspring she decides to generate.

Sucker! So much for that even break!

This is not a new concept. In fact, one of the great novels, Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, opens with the sentence, “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.” A truth universally acknowledged among women looking for a lifetime of support, that is, for the members of their social circle all evaluate each other’s possible choices before any of the choices are even aware that there has been a selection. This selection had to have become a traditional practice long before Austen’s novel was published in 1813, otherwise how did she arrive at such a startling premise with which to initiate her story? Women love this book, and seem to feel that it represents an accurate approach to successful gender relations.

Guys tend to really despise this book. Yet if my feminine sources are honest, there is much for young men to learn about how women view them in such books no matter how boring in relation to playing video war games. In the War Between The Genders, men are seriously vulnerable to counterattack from those women they approach blindly through their poor reconnaissance, and thus don’t know that women tend to only see men as an economic means to a comfortable lifestyle end. These under-prepared men fail to heed Sun-Tzu, and become captives in defeat. They become among those whom Thoreau derided as “living lives of quiet desperation“.

Yet, it may be that some of these victorious women don’t consciously realize exactly what they are doing, for the process has clearly been deeply ingrained in Western feminine culture for a long time – as evidenced by Austen’s premise. These young women just do as their mothers did. They will succeed, and the end justifies the means. Aware men could thus evade their clutches:

Your grandparents’ version of a rave.

The motivations of the genders differ in the mate selection process. For instance, in May 2014, Concordia University released a study which found that men and women select mates using a very different set of criteria. Men tend to fall for the external appearance of women, a visage which is carefully crafted to camouflage her real self from the unsuspecting male. We all know what trouble that leads to!

black_canary_by_warrenlouw

– Black Canary, by warrenlouw. If this is copyrighted, I’ll remove it.

Males get stuck on looks, and the lower head is thus available for mind control. Women on the other hand, use the points of “parental investment theory” according to one of the study authors, Gad Saad, PhD. The “parental” word is the tell. Her focus is on breeding, and not on the father of her intended children – and she hasn’t yet become pregnant by him (in most cases). If she’s looking into selecting a breeding partner, she’s done with Alpha Phux and is ready for Beta Bucks. Think of the recent news regarding Bristol Palin becoming pregnant by Dakota Meyer -even though they had just met- as the example. Her tactic was no different than that of the Taliban action which won him the Medal of Honor – an ambush.

It is thus with most young men. They have no idea that the sexy hottie buttering him up and fawning over his SMV is intending to take all he has – his name, his game, his fame (if any), his cash, his stash, his freedom, his hobbies, his control, and all of his choices. It all becomes hers as part of the promise she extracts from him to provide for her and “his” children. His role is then to reliably plod after that dangling carrot and bring home all it delivers in trade for the honor of being the “head of the household” (No title has ever been more of an oxymoron!), at least until he drops from the exertion. Then the life insurance payout had better be hefty! How else will she live in the style to which she has become accustomed?

But young men learn this too late, after the rings and the ceremony and the I Dos. It happened to me, and it happened to all of my friends. I don’t want to see it happen to my sons or their friends, not that everyone will be saved from making foolish choices. Some will merely dance mindlessly to “That’s The Way I Always Heard It Should Be” just like their mothers raised them to do.

In an effort to reveal to young men open to learn from the experiences of us old dogs about how women think about men, I located some relevant comments from famous women. One comes from actress Hedy Lamarr: “Every girl would like to marry a rich husband. I did twice.” She was supported in this attitude by the infamous Zsa Zsa Gabor, whose family thrived on taking rich men to the cleaners. Zsa Zsa once said, “I am a marvelous housekeeper; every time I leave a man I keep his house.” Great-granny firmly believed in such comments, and emulated them to the best of her ability!

Today’s young woman, however, has an additional demand her ancestors did not tend to care about: sexual satisfaction. For every older woman who claims “Sex is highly overrated” there are at least two younger women who insist otherwise. Cosmopolitan‘s Patti Greco just declared in a review of the GRRRL Power flick Magic Mike XXL, “…guys were put on this earth to please women…“. Entertainer Nicki Minaj maintained to a Cosmo interviewer, “I demand that I climax. I think women should demand that“. Minaj’s imposition was reinforced by Amy Schumer in Glamour Magazine: “Don’t not have an orgasm. Make sure he knows that you’re entitled to an orgasm“. Great way to catch a dick, Amy!

This “Men MUST Please Me” attitude might be an attempt to ward off the drudgery of the marital condition women sometimes mindlessly seek so avidly. Poet Sylvia Plath once expressed, “So I began to think maybe it was true that when you were married and had children it was like being brainwashed, and afterward you went about as numb as a slave in a totalitarian state.” All one needs to understand about this comment is contained in her rant against her father in her poem Daddy: “Daddy, I have had to kill you. You died before I had time–” In her poem, she’s blaming all men via her expired father for her chosen and sorry domestic existence. It has to be a man’s fault, for it sure as hell can’t have been her making a mistake! Plath might have benefited from a conversation with Actress Lauren Bacall, who once averred that “Most women use more brains picking a horse in the third at Belmont than they do picking a husband.” Based on the recent rash of infant murders by their too-young and totally-not-ready-for-prime-parenting-time fathers (and some mothers) here in the US, one might make a case that this observation still applies.

The most cynical comment I found in a very brief search comes from English author Angela Carter: “What is marriage but prostitution to one man instead of many? No different!” This comment clearly expresses the disdain for the male desire for sex which is exploited to satisfy the feminine quest for financial gain, the goal which Jane Austen used for the plot of her novel 200 years ago. Once a woman has achieved that matrimonial objective, she has little incentive to indulge his desires anymore. She holds the ring and the license, and the law will back her if there is a dispute.

Need proof that his needs are of no concern? How about these comments from married Average Joes:

Lee Chapin · The Ohio State University: “Works for awhile, then tapers off and disappears. She got what she wanted.”

Christian Aragon: “Men get tired of wanting, needing, and desiring with no fulfilment.”

Geoff Elliott: “Maybe some husbands are so tired of being turned down for sex that they simply give up and quit asking.”

Eric A. Milliner · Richmond, Virginia: “I hope my son never gets married. It’s simply not worth it.”

Young men might well benefit from such comments, and these open and honest exposés from famous women which precede them, but they are far more likely to heed the experience of another man closer to their age. Rollo Tomassi is one such man who examined his own life in detail to see where he might well have gone astray. In his That Was Then post, he says many things today’s young men would be wise to understand. A brief sample:

“There was a time when I was in my late teens to right before I was 21….a dangerous time for young men feminized and conditioned to put women’s imperatives, ambitions and support above their own….he is at his most eager to please while she is just coming into realizing what her sexual market value peak can leverage for her. Don’t assume that this leveraging is strictly based on securing things for herself, but rather what her impulses are leading her to.” [emphasis mine]

Feminized young men: It’s just one of the social problems caused by the Industrial Revolution and the rise of Office Capitalism. Men just aren’t home much to raise their sons. The Job demands the bulk of their time.

The mothers have far more time with the scions of the industrious, and rarely surrender that chore to their male partners even when their own time is tight. After all, he doesn’t know how to raise children any better than he knows how to do anything else without his wife telling him repeatedly how it’s to be done! She might as well just do it herself – as usual! He gets the leftover time slots to try to have a relationship with his offspring, and if he’s lucky, he doesn’t have to overcome the disdain for him that his children pick up from their mothers. I’m very sorry to report that this disdain was the norm in the neighborhood where I grew up. No matter how good a job he did bringing home the bacon, it was never enough and he’d just have to do better next time.

While Tomassi uses “impulses” in describing feminine behavior, it’s my opinion that he means what I suggest above, where I say that women tend to do what their mothers did without any active examination over what they are doing – or why. And, as a recent survey conducted by AskMen.com reveals, they have plenty of suckers out there to exploit as women choose. One such exclaimed, “I’m happy when she is happy. Women are such wonderful creatures. It’s all about letting her know she is worshipped.

Any woman who marries such a “man” bolts within two years – and he won’t know what hit him when she does.

There is a long list of reasons why Real Men should not let their sons blindly get wed to women. Real Men teach their sons as much as possible about women so that the sons can either make an informed choice and be able to spot the unicorn in a herd of heifers, or to avoid them entirely. If awareness happens early enough, they can see what Dad goes through with Mom for years (as my sons did) to illustrate the point: There is a cost to every benefit, and unless these balance, it is not a good deal to enter. So don’t.

There are some women who now see the folly of the marital condition: “I lived what a lot of other people thought was a picture-perfect life. I had the kid, the second home and all of the trappings we, as women, are taught to desire….I probably shouldn’t have gotten married. It’s a tough realization, but what’s done is done….I didn’t really need all of “those things.” –Lisa Schmidt She left her marriage with a fair amount of swag and still claims to love him – despite divorcing him. She wouldn’t have done it any other way.

There need to be more men who see this danger, and to see this prior to getting ensnared in Charlotte’s Wedding Web. It costs dearly. Sometimes fatally. Ask Sylvia Plath.

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111 comments on “Bride and Prejudice
  1. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    There is a point that you left out. Terrence Popp makes it. Today, in his home state, a man can get by on $24k/year. Once married, he’ll need three times as much.

    What women seem to have forgotten, if they ever knew, is that men have to be “sold” on getting married.

    Quite so, Brother Bear. That is what the promise of sexual bliss was intended to achieve. As that began to lose its effectiveness, actual coitus had to be endured to get him to believe the promise. Now, even that isn’t working as well as it once did, and the unrung belles bemoan that men won’t grow up and fall for those old lies.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Cill says:

    Man, I like this post brother B.

    In practice, “spot the unicorn in a herd of heifers” effectively boils down to “avoid them entirely”, the likelihood of most men ever encountering a unicorn being near enough to zero.

    One of the many things I take from your post is that men tend to look back on marriage 1.0 through rose-tinted spectacles. During talks with men of my grandfathers’ generation and older, they have given me the impression that marriage 1.0 was never good for any more than a small minority of men. I think it’s a feminist ploy to promote the myth that marriage 1.0 was for the benefit of men to the detriment of women.

    Feminism has brought the contempt that most Western women have for men out into the open, but not enough men can see it even then. Most men persist in carrying so much goodwill towards women, they are blind to the truth when it parades in front of them in all it’s garish detail.

    My next post is going to travel similar paths.

    Liked by 5 people

  3. Yoda says:

    What women sem to have forgotten, if they ever knew, is that men have to be “sold” on getting married.

    Sold on paying taxes men need to happen not.
    Happens automatically it does.

    Like

  4. Yoda says:

    During talks with men of my grandfathers’ generation and older, they have given me the impression that marriage #1 was never good for any more than a small minority of men.

    Your grandfather’s generation many divorces it did have?

    Like

  5. Yoda says:

    Feminism has brought the contempt that most Western women have for men out into the open, but not enough men can see it even then.

    Watch a modern sitcom the men might.

    Why so much contempt they do have?

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Yoda says:

    In practice, “spot the unicorn in a herd of heifers”

    If heifers they are,
    vurgna they are not.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Yoda says:

    virgins that is

    Liked by 1 person

  8. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    “Why so much contempt they do have?”
    That is a very good question. If they allowed it, the answer would be worth a PhD. I think that a lot of it is attributable to mob psychology and hysteria. One starts grousing, they all start grousing, and it gets louder and louder.
    I am beginning to wonder, in a culture that has so much contempt for men, is marriage advisable?

    I don’t know if I have shared it but, in Japan herbivores are at an all time high and marriage at an all time low. It’s not feminism but tradition. Men hand over the whole paycheck and get an allowance that keeps them in lunch money while they work eighty hours a week. Marriage is sexless. When spouses talk to each other, they’re not even trying to be nice. What kid would sign up for that?

    Liked by 3 people

  9. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I linked to this photo yesterday. Here’s an update. Appearantly, the Green Party is disowning the association.

    https://mgtowrevolution.wordpress.com/2015/08/08/mgtow-men-please-comment-to-veronica-feminist-can-dish-it-out-but-cant-take-the-heat-special-snowflake-victim-hood-at-its-best/

    Liked by 3 people

  10. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    for those who are following Roosh, it seems that his talk went off in Montreal today without incident. Hard to believe since I have never seen anyone do as much to get the fembots all riled up.

    Like

  11. Tarnished says:

    I had the kid, the second home and all of the trappings we, as women, are taught to desire…

    Are they taught to want this horizontally or vertically? Methinks a bit of both, but which is louder? In my life, family members rather than magazines/TV pushed it more, but I’m 31…perhaps it is reversed now?

    Your grandfather’s generation many divorces it did have?

    Cill probably meant Marriage 1.0, not that there were many #1/first marriages.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. SFC Ton says:

    Civilization relies on men being ignorant of many things, the reality of women is just one part of that ignorance

    Women don’t give a fuck about parental possibilities which is why convicts etc have so many kids, think I read on average more the law abiding men. That’s one disagreement

    The other is women kill their own children more often then men. Men are more a danger to step kids, which frankly makes sense because they are outside his smallest circle of in group and a liability to his own genetic legacy.

    The demand for orgasms is a shit test. When a man fails it he becomes the bitch but it is interesting how women who have difficulties commanding will blame men instead of their own fucked up biology and it’s pathetic that men will accept that blame. This is more true of men with a low N count. While it is not Biblical and horrible to contemplate I do not think a man should marry if his N count is bellow 30 & really a hundred would be a better number. Otherwise it is my supposition he lacks experience and is to prom to one-itist.

    Not dividing equaling success in marriage is a pretty shitty criteria. I see a metric shit ton of unhappy married men who have not and likely will.not divorce. They are POW’s and slaves but keep on keeping on at it. It is not success. I would say a successful marriage is one where the man does not envy single men and would repeat the experience. I know 2 such men.

    Liked by 3 people

  13. Cill says:

    Tarn, “Cill probably meant Marriage 1.0”
    Yes I did. I changed it accordingly. Thanks for pointing it out.

    Like

  14. A gal who works for me takes this approach in her marriage (ewwww, sex w him???) she’s very unhappy as well. I told her the way I see it she’s hoot it all backwards. You get married TO have sex, married people should be getting it on!

    Liked by 2 people

  15. Choicy says:

    “she quickly shifts into evaluating two things about you: how ambitious you are, and how much you are likely to earn.”

    Yeah, it took this digger too many years to learn this lesson, mate. I try to explain this truth to young blokes but it usually goes in one ear and out the other. My mate Cillo is right, men have buckets of goodwill toward women. I think men are born with it, and it takes a heck of a lot of punishment to kick it out of the male brain. Most men will never learn and some don’t want to learn. The truth is as cold as a mother-in-law’s kiss.

    Liked by 3 people

  16. BuenaVista says:

    ‘You’re So Vain’ is about Warren Beatty. At the time he was living with Annette Benning, when she was making The Grifters (i.e., hotter than July), he was emailing around searching for silent pussy.

    While true, I felt that the song also fits Amy Schuler and her attitude, as well as Lena Dunham, and our performers in the linked video.

    ***

    The problem with de-programming boys is that their primary influences reflect feminist control: school, and mothers. Or school, mothers, and social workers saving them from their evil fathers. I guess the ongoing marriage strike by Gen Y and X men reflects fear, uncertainty and doubt, but FUD is just a dark cloud of indecision, not a life strategy. I imagine these young guys will capitulate in the end.

    ***

    My one beef with the excellent post is that many women appear to revert to AF mode once they’ve locked in their material resources and children. Think of what the “demand a climax” movement means to the already desperate BB men. They married them for money and sperm, and now they’re supposed to make the earth move too.

    Only she won’t allow it. She doesn’t want to seem slutty.

    Paraphrasing Ton, I actually mentioned to one of my favorite psychos, and ex-Mormon, that sure I’d get married again — after polygamy is legalized (as it will be very shortly). This suggestion was received positively.

    Liked by 2 people

  17. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    BuenaVista,
    If enough women want polygamy, it will pass. The whole reasom for monogamy and strict enforcemnt of bigamy was to protect women. That it could come to this is brain twisting.
    You know what. If they would rather shate alphas, fine. Don’t ask for any favors from betas.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Bloom,
    This comment of yours was enough to put me off my appetite for a while. That’s saying a lot, I’m a bear and always hungry.

    “A gal who works for me takes this approach in her marriage (ewwww, sex w him???) she’s very unhappy as well. I told her the way I see it she’s hoot it all backwards. You get married TO have sex, married people should be getting it on!”

    MOre than any other exponent, this womean is your worst philosophical enemy. She is trashing her husband’s spirit, she is trashing the reputation of American women, and she is making a mockery of marriage. You can come back at skanks by demonstrating virtue. With women like this, the ranks of unwilling men will remain full.
    A side thought, I’ll bet a doughnut that his SMV has fallen a little since they married while hers has fqallen off a cliff.
    What the heck is she thinking?

    Liked by 3 people

  19. Tarnished says:

    Fuzzie,

    You’re assuming she is thinking her actions through to a conclusion or pondering the future consequences. That’s your first mistake.

    Second mistake is believing women (as a whole…NAWALT applies as FB would say) have the “rose-tinted glasses” of real love that men (again, in general) have towards their spouses. If a man and woman who marry say, in their early-mid 20’s, and build a life together they will be able to look at each other *through* the onset of aging to how they formerly were.

    Not so much nowadays. Now there’s the constant desire for one’s spouse to look like a 21 year old hunk (or babe) at every stage of the relationship, which is obviously unrealistic. Very few women will look like Halle Berry when they’re pushing 40, and only a similar number of men can look like Patrick Stewart does at his age. We should all strive to take the best care of our bodies at all times, of course, but until we create some sort of telomerase therapy…simple aging will always happen.

    The wife Bloom describes has apparently both forgotten this fact AND has neglected to look in a mirror the last 5 years. A piss poor combination if there ever was one.

    Liked by 3 people

  20. Liz says:

    Whoa. That ‘I Didn’t Think My Marriage was all that bad…’ article.
    That was just awful. 😦
    Good thing he got away.

    Too many -like me- don’t

    Liked by 2 people

  21. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    This subject is worth a long post all by itself. I am beginning to believe that the greatest threat to marriage is not from feminism but women behaving as this one does. First, she is not interested in sex with her husband. This is fundational and he is living an involuntarily celibae lifestyle through her choice. She’s still there because he is bringing in the income, making her a financial parasite.
    How many marriages out there are like this? The answer has to be- a lot.
    This is worse for the image than Monty Python’s “Conquistador Coffee Kills!”

    Liked by 3 people

  22. Tarnished says:

    Fuzzie,

    Truth.
    And though it is not considered ethical by most standards, I’d personally have great difficulty in condemning said man were he to find a more willing partner on the side. Denial of sex is bad enough, but if there’s also denial of base affection and respect? I’d find a mistress, too.

    Oh, but don’t “worry”. It’ll still be completely his fault for cheating on her… :/

    Liked by 3 people

  23. Liz says:

    “This subject is worth a long post all by itself. I am beginning to believe that the greatest threat to marriage is not from feminism but women behaving as this one does.”

    I think the two are related. Devaluing men has led to disrespect, and disrespect leads to that type of behavior pattern.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Bloom,
    I hadn’t even begun to consider what he should do. In the old days, a man whould grab his coat ahd say that he was walking to the corner store for something inconsequential and never come back.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. SFC Ton says:

    That woman gets away with behaving like that because of feminism and domestic violence laws.

    In the old days he would have broken out his pimp hand and she would have behaved until he need to again.

    Like

  26. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I just reread my last comment and saw that I addressed Bloom instead of you. I’m sorry.

    Liz, you’re correct.

    Ton,
    Your way gives her a second chance. That is better.

    Like

  27. Oh I agree completely it is so unfair to him and tell her so. I asked her if she’d be ok w him cheating? She said no. I said well then if you expect him to be faithful to only you, you need to be willing and enthusiastic sista! She admitted it was true. She creates her own misery (and her family’s)

    Liked by 3 people

  28. Tarnished says:

    She admitted it was true…and…?
    Does she understand what this means, or is she still a victim of cranial posterior insertion?

    Liked by 2 people

  29. Cill says:

    “cranial posterior insertion?”?
    I’m trying to form a mental picture but… it ain’t forming.

    Liked by 2 people

  30. Liz says:

    I think she means the woman’s head is up her ass.

    Or, it could be something I’ve heard they do in Thailand…

    Liked by 2 people

  31. Cill says:

    I’m not sure Liz. What on earth is “cranial posterior” ? It’s got me beat. What’s the significance of the back of the head?

    Liked by 2 people

  32. Liz says:

    😀 Cill

    Liked by 3 people

  33. Cill says:

    Drat. She saw through it. I was hoping to elicit a *serious* response

    Liked by 3 people

  34. Tarnished says:

    Tarn,
    I just reread my last comment and saw that I addressed Bloom instead of you. I’m sorry.

    No problem, Fuzzie.
    It seems to happen a lot. 😛

    Ton,
    Your way gives her a second chance. That is better.

    Perhaps it’s because I was raised to never hit anyone unless they hit me first (self defense, in other words), but who would *want* a second chance with a spouse that slaps or punches them? At that very moment, I’d think a line was crossed and a trust was broken that can never, ever be repaired…not truly.

    I would never act like a spouse who goads their husband or wife into being physical, but I’d also never stay with one who proved to be. Boyfriend…girlfriend…husband…wife…FwB…doesn’t matter. If they didn’t leave, *I* would. You don’t raise a hand to someone you supposedly “love”.

    (Children can get a quick swat on the rear for certain punishments. Thought I’d point that out before I get accused of being a hippie/Progressive again.)

    Liked by 2 people

  35. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Bloom,
    I’ll bet, if you dig deeper, it’ll get worse. You already know that she’s disgusted by the hought of having sex with him and he’s not allowed to cheat. I’ll bet she considers porn as cheating along with mastubation. I’ll also bet, when she feels “frisky” thete are “toys” in the nightstand.
    This is so typicl and it gets worse and worse. Other men will see it, and, realizing they have no defense or recourse under lae, are just going to sta single.

    Tarn,
    My “old fashioned” solution would be for the man to walk out the door and never come back. That’s kind of final. You will notice that Ton is being deliberately vague when he talks about “pimp hand”. However, I don’t think he means making a wife stnd in a corner.

    Liked by 2 people

  36. Tarnished says:

    Fuzzie,

    Maybe leaving is more harsh in it’s own way, but the fact that it is so final *plus* a very real possibility means you’d have to be a tremendous fuck up to get it to that point. If I ever just packed a bag and never returned…it wouldn’t be over my SO leaving the cap off the toothpaste or eating all the cookies I made for a party. It’d be due to them being a complete asshat in some form. I imagine those who found the need to do so in the past had similar boundaries that were crossed, and enough self respect to know that isn’t what they deserved.

    Backbones are good to have.

    Liked by 2 people

  37. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    It’s a bad time to be a man. Today, my theoretical runaway man would be found and forced to pay through his nose.
    I do miss having Bloom participate.
    With all the studies about women would rather be doing than having sex, we may need to swallow another red pill-the majority of women are sexually unresponsive. It does go a long way to explaining why, with parity in numbers, men generate more “demand” for sex.

    Liked by 1 person

  38. Tarnished says:

    It’s a bad time to be a man. Today, my theoretical runaway man would be found and forced to pay through his nose.
    Unfortunately, yes. What worked in the yesteryear doesn’t work in the here and now.

    I do miss having Bloom participate.
    I as well. She has a unique perspective and interacts with more couples/women than the majority of us. Her information is interesting and useful to many discussions.
    And she keeps a Toblerone stocked house…

    With all the studies about women would rather be doing than having sex, we may need to swallow another red pill-the majority of women are sexually unresponsive. It does go a long way to explaining why, with parity in numbers, men generate more “demand” for sex.

    Which is still just so weird. Unless you’re exhausted/sick, recuperating from surgery, or have legitimate sexual dysfunctions (like ovarian cysts or vaginismus, for example) why would you not want sex? It’s baffling.

    Liked by 1 person

  39. Liz says:

    “Which is still just so weird. Unless you’re exhausted/sick, recuperating from surgery, or have legitimate sexual dysfunctions (like ovarian cysts or vaginismus, for example) why would you not want sex? It’s baffling.”

    It’s not so baffling, necessarily. For a lot of women, appetite comes with eating. Studies show that when couples make it a policy to have sex more frequently together, the women want sex more frequently. When women stop having sex with their spouse they want it less frequently (their sex drives are generally lower by far anyway…less testosteron).

    Liked by 3 people

  40. Tarnished says:

    For a lot of women, appetite comes with eating. Studies show that when couples make it a policy to have sex more frequently together, the women want sex more frequently. When women stop having sex with their spouse they want it less frequently

    Huh. So women tend to only eat when they’re actually hungry, and only have sex when they’re actually horny? 😕
    That explains a lot.

    I work out 4x a week because I enjoy eating. Not eating crap…I don’t binge on chocolate or ice cream. But I’ll eat half a bag of grapes or a full 2 plates of spinach fettuccine or portobello stroganoff if it’s there. The entire experience of eating (the various smells, textures, tastes, and combinations thereof) is just too amazing to pass up. Kinda like sex.

    Uncoincidentally, I like to take my time with both, lol. Amiright? 😉

    Liked by 3 people

  41. Liz says:

    Tarn, appetite and eating in this case were intended to be entirely metaphorical (sex drive). Nothing to do with food. 😉

    Appetite comes with eating example: we have sex every day. When we don’t I miss it and want it. I mike is away for a week I miss it but over time the desire sort of dissipates if he is gone long enough.

    Liked by 2 people

  42. Yoda says:

    What on earth is “cranial posterior” ? It’s got me beat.

    Padawan insight he probably does have

    Liked by 1 person

  43. I do think women are able to shut off their sexual drive in a way men maybe cannot? And when you think about it, it’s probably biological. If women were as horny as men… Baby momma central! However it’s also something a woman can easily turn on and should in marriage. More is more, as Liz says. The gals who did the every day for 30 days challenge a few years back reported it feeling like they had to talk themselves into it at first but by the end of the month they didn’t want to stop! A married woman being asexual is in a way a bad habit, and a behavior that can change. My friend, her husband is a good guy who is good to her. He truly tries. If he were mean to her or a jerk or whatever I would understand, but no. And perhaps she’s especially wired to need some bad boy to get her going? She’s the same one who was chomping at the bit when I described Ton! At the wedding as she was admiring the groomsmen I jokingly told her what she needed was a good spanking and a good rogering and that I was going to call her hubby and tell him so! She wouldn’t give me the phone but her eyes sure were lit up and she was laughing! I just might do it if she doesn’t figure it out. Or maybe I will buy her some female erotica, she’d be all worked up and attacking him I bet! For women it starts in the mind… It’s almost always simply a mental block. Yes in some cases there are physical reasons but those can be over one if so. No ody who is married should have to be celibate. Not ok. That’s like starving someone. That’s not love. Ok rant over. Married people get to it!!!

    Liked by 4 people

  44. Tarnished says:

    Liz said:I mike is away for a week I miss it but over time the desire sort of dissipates if he is gone long enough.

    Bloom said:No body who is married should have to be celibate. Not ok. That’s like starving someone.

    This is why I am confused, and why I ran with the “hunger/food” analogy (and to be descriptive without needing trigger warnings for Yoda, lol).

    Why would the hunger for sex disparate, rather than get stronger? 😕
    Curiouser and curioser…

    Liked by 1 person

  45. I am not sure the hunger analogy is a good fit, it was the spirit of it that’s taters I think. For men perhaps lack increases drive (I will leave it to the guys to describe that.) for women I do think that less leads to less. Often women report they won’t be in the mood when it all starts (unlike a man) but that they can get in the mood along the way.

    Also another possible biological reasoning for this, not so long ago sex equaled the possibility of physically carting a baby for 9 months and all that goes with it (nausea, weight gain, fatigue, other body being hijacked weirdness) followed by a painful and dangerous labor and delivery (not long ago minus medical care) then a good two years of caring for a totally dependant being and a serious lack of time to sleep, eat, take care of yourself, etc. also not long ago that was mostly women’s work and of course if he ran off, she’s sol. No mandatory child support etc.

    So this maybe all also plays a subconcious role… Men do not need to factor in the physical costs of “fruitful” sex in the same way women have never been able to escape until reliable birth control. Or in other words, sex wasn’t recreational for the ladies until fairly recently -it’s always been a sort of Russian roulette.

    Just random thoughts…

    Liked by 1 person

  46. SFC Ton says:

    This is an amazing time to be a man! Gun are better then ever before, muscle cars are only getting better, there are some great Bourbons on the market, deer populations are thriving, bear hunting gets better and better, airfare isn’t so outrageously priced you cannot save up and do so fishing all over the world. What is there to not like?

    LOL eating all cookies you made for a party; Tom Sp-wan Production Facility made a standing eye of round roast for a party last week. I ate it before she could get out the door. Reckon it was for sandwiches or some such and I am not such a fan of bread….

    Tarn your observation on that fails to live up to the real world test. Woman stay with men who use their pimp hand and leave betas. Its how the world works. If he will not stand up to her, a mere woman, how will he stand up to other men, lions, tigers, bears etc etc

    I mean disciplinary acting; spankings that are not light and fun, slap to the face, reducing her discretionary spending budget…. standing on a corner would work to. As long as there is a price to pay for her ill behavior. I am deliberately vague because the topic is way to large to really address but discipline her like you would a child. Spare the rod, spoil the child and women are basically children.

    Like

  47. Liz says:

    “Why would the hunger for sex disparate, rather than get stronger?”

    Dissipate, you mean? I have no idea why it does, but it does in my experience. I don’t turn into some sort of horny mess if Mike is away for a while, I just rearrange my priorities and feel less need for sex. If it helps, think of it like an illness where you don’t feel like eating. Your stomach shrinks and even once you feel better, you don’t have as much of an appetite until you start eating…and THEN you’re like, “heckya! Pass me some fried chicken!” (or whatever ymmv)

    Liked by 1 person

  48. Tarnished says:

    I mean disciplinary acting; spankings that are not light and fun, slap to the face, reducing her discretionary spending budget…. standing on a corner would work to.

    I know exactly what you meant, Ton. Maybe there are girls out there who are highly immature and never grew up mentally or emotionally into adult women and they “need” this type of discipline from a daddy-husband. Maybe there’s even a lot of them in your part of the country. Sounds plausible from some of your stories.

    But, and please excuse my language, why the fuck would you ever marry, date, or even deign to be around such a person?
    Honestly, why?

    You’re supposed to be husband and wife, or at least lover and lover. How could you share sex, have children, and create a life with someone who never grew beyond age 8? Hell, I’d be unable to trust them to not set the house on fire or feed the dog…

    Liked by 1 person

  49. Tarnished says:

    Dissipate, you mean?

    Yes. Apparently I’m borrowing Bloom’s autocorrect… 😉

    If it helps, think of it like an illness where you don’t feel like eating.

    Never have experienced this, even when I’ve got a stomach flu. Closest is when I had an allergic reaction to a cold medicine and lost my sense of smell and taste for nearly 3 weeks. It was absolutely terrible…everything, even really spicy or hot foods were like cardboard. If that’s the analogy we’re working with…geez. I can understand now!

    Liked by 1 person

  50. SFC Ton says:

    all women are like that

    if what you say is possible on a wide scale feminism/ equal partnership marriages would be a success

    At best women can be purple pill. this become more clear near by the lady post

    Like

  51. Tarnished says:

    all women are like that

    Then I am most assuredly not a woman. The very first time someone thinks they can put their hands on me in an act of non-self defense, I leave.

    No second chances.
    No talking it over.
    No apologies accepted.
    No forgiveness given.

    Just walk out the door and get on with my life without that person. It hurts, and it means never speaking to some relatives ever again, but it’s the only way.

    For what it’s worth, I don’t think many of the “true” women here would put up with that either…nor any of the men. I could be wrong, but hope not.

    Liked by 1 person

  52. Tarnished says:

    To go along with this:

    I also would never, ever raise a hand to my lover nor expect him to not hit me back if I did. Men can absolutely defend themselves against women. Those who claim they shouldn’t are idiotic and putting females on an undeserved pedestal.

    Like

  53. SFC Ton says:

    you are certainly free to think what you like but you seem pretty typical to me… including all women say they’d never put up with xyz.

    Like

  54. Tarnished says:

    Fat chance of that, scfton. I put up with it when I was a child and had no options to leave. No way in either hell or the Gods’ green earth I’d do so again willingly now that I don’t have to. That’s the difference between the broken boys/girls and strong men/women Liz spoke of before…One group accepts pain as their lot in life, the other grows to know it’s not their fault or what should happen to them.

    You are also free to think what you like.
    Better be careful though. That sounds “Progressive”, lol.

    Like

  55. SFC Ton says:

    LOL its a feature not a bug

    Like

  56. Tarnished says:

    As you wish, scfton.
    As you wish.

    Like

  57. SFC Ton says:

    not as I wish but reality

    Like

  58. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Bloom,
    I never expected my speculation to be that close to the truth.
    This “friend” has made a habit out of rejecting her husband, I don’t think thaere is much he can do, legally, to turn this around. They’re stuck. It can be useful as a cautionary tale for single men.

    Liked by 1 person

  59. Tarnished says:

    Thankfully, not everyone’s.

    Like

  60. Tarnished says:

    Fuzzie,

    You don’t think he can make the no-fault laws work in his favor? While approx 70% of divorces are initiated by the female partner, that still means 30% are initiated by the male. Maybe those 30% found lawyers willing to actually help them?

    Liked by 1 person

  61. SFC Ton says:

    only a woman or progressive is foolish enough to think there is more then one reality

    Like

  62. SFC Ton says:

    here is the thing with no fault
    you have to prove there was fault
    hope the judge doesn’t autmoaticaly throw it back into no fault status

    Be better for the husband to blow all the cash( stash a lot of cash), rack up a shit ton of fucking debt and I mean a fucking metric shit ton on stuff he wants/ needs etc etc then file. he’ll get the debt and what not, poison any chance for her to win cash and prizes then file bankruptcy when its done.

    Like

  63. SFC Ton says:

    Not all states see no sex as at fault. NC does but I don’t know how many do…. I filed at fault for no sex, it was kicked back to no fault; buddy’s 17 year old son caught his mom/ friend’s wife in bed with another due and…. you guessed it no fault

    Like

  64. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I wsn’t thinking about divorce. Under “at fault” he would have grounds with “alienation of affection”. I think he could get an annullment based on this too. Annullment is a recourse for people who were defrauded by marriage. It’s religious.
    Yes, he has been defrauded.

    Like

  65. Tarnished says:

    Different people have different experiences in their lives. This doesn’t mean that there literally are separate realities in the same plane, just that what you have experienced in your own interactions with people/situations is very different than what others have.

    If the only women you’ve had significant interaction with have a psychological need for a disciplinary father-husband…then yeah, it’s not too difficult to find that you think all/most others are needing or wanting the same.

    But just because that’s what you’ve encountered doesn’t necessarily mean it’s true for everyone, everywhere.
    That’s an impossibility.

    So yes, I fully accept that you know many women who are as you describe.

    Like

  66. SFC Ton says:

    and all of them say… no second chances etc. comes down to alpha the dude is

    Like

  67. Liz says:

    I think it I wanted someone to hit me, I’d be with someone who hit me.

    Liked by 2 people

  68. BuenaVista says:

    NAWALT!

    Wow.

    Like

  69. Tarnished says:

    Fuzzie,
    Sounds like he needs to learn about the laws in his state first and foremost…

    Scfton,
    Only speaking for myself here:

    It matters exactly 0% how alpha or beta or zeta someone is. If I were to get slapped or punched by one who said they “loved” me, obviously they were lying. Having a relationship of any kind (lover, husband, boyfriend, father, etc) based on lies is like having a coastal home on pillars of sand…you’re fucked. Best course of action is to abandon ship before it all goes under and drags you both down with it.

    That goes for both sexes. It’s just that our system screws men over in DV cases more often than helping them, which is a double standard that needs to die. Men are not required to sit and take violence from their spouse either.

    Like

  70. Tarnished says:

    Precisely, Liz.
    And yet there are those that obviously want it and actively choose it. Not denying that.

    Liked by 1 person

  71. Liz says:

    “And yet there are those that obviously want it and actively choose it. Not denying that.”

    Yes, the fucked up ones. Like the one in the story above. She would respond well to a smack down. In fact, she probably is unable to respond well to much anything less. Maybe about one out of five women are this way (or maybe even higher). It’s not a small number, but it’s still a minority.

    Liked by 1 person

  72. Tarnished says:

    So frickin sad, Liz.
    But you’re likely right.
    What can make otherwise normal people respond this way? It’s a minority still, yes, but too high a number to be explained away by abusive/weird-ass childhoods. There must be something else…

    Like

  73. Yoda says:

    New post there is

    Liked by 1 person

  74. I put up with a lot in my marriage but the day he raised his hand threatening to strike me, it was done. Maybe it works for some but it’s a no 2nd chance, no return moment in my book. What other women do I cannot say, nor have I ever u x’ers good how they could do anything but walk. The only way I would stay was if I physically could not escape, and well then that what poison is for my dears! 😛

    Liked by 1 person

  75. Tarnished says:

    What other women do I cannot say, nor have I ever u x’ers good how they could do anything but walk.

    Your autocorrect has betrayed you again, Bloom. 😛
    But yeah…once such trust is gone, it can rarely be regained in any meaningful amount. :/

    Like

  76. Whoops I mean i have never understood.

    Does it work w some women? Yes. The shank in my hometown yelling sexual offers at the passing GIs, she would probably respond well to getting the pimp hand, and frankly if I were around her too long I might give her the pump hand myself she was so….out of control.

    I pride myself w getting it together long before any pimp hand is needed. I’d much rather play fight instead. Two out of three wins??? I am a mighty good wrestler, truth be told.

    True violence? I just don’t get it. To each her own…

    Liked by 1 person

  77. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    It is curious how this thread went from a converstion about wives witholding sex from their husbands to husbands beating wives.

    Liked by 1 person

  78. BuenaVista says:

    Husbands don’t beat wives; wives want a man who can haul them up over their shoulder in a big city and walk back to the hotel while civilized society honks in outrage from their fucking Toyotas and Hondas. Without apology.

    I’m single, so I would never do that, of course. I’ve never been to Russia, either, where the girls take their shirts off on the dance floor, the concierge knows there’s the opera (the Mariinsky) and the OPERA (the clubs at 3 a.m.), and the cops’ version of a Breathalyzer is an open palm for the 30 rubles that will buy them a cup of coffee.

    I’ve traveled more than I care to do anymore. So the Bulgarian Ph.D who is flying out here next week kindly provided a graphic photo of what she is about to present, for real. I’m sure it’s because she hopes we discuss poetry, while I ply her with my homemade pastry and latin coffee. Yup. That’s the explanation.

    Like

  79. Tarnished says:

    It is curious how this thread went from a converstion about wives witholding sex from their husbands to husbands beating wives.

    Not necessarily, Fuzzie.
    That’s why I kept repeating the fact that neither the male or female partner should endure such actions against them (unless of course they are the broken type who “like” it). It isn’t a matter of Male = beater/Female = victim like the moronic SJWs whine about constantly. Sites like Toysoldier’s are quite adept at showing just how ungendered most violence is…regardless of how un-PC it is for femidiots to admit.

    It all basically boils down to having empathy for your whatever-sex SO, whether that involves having sex so they aren’t frustrated or being patient if they screw something up, and many things inbetween.

    Liked by 1 person

  80. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I don’t know.

    Liked by 1 person

  81. SFC Ton says:

    Pimp.hand is not beating

    And this is why red pill discussions with women are pointless.

    Like

  82. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Sfc Ton,
    It has gotten to the point where using logic in an argument is considered abuse. It’s gotten ridiculous and unworkable.
    That may well have been the goal.

    Tarn,
    I took some of my own medecine and watched a bear video. I feel better.
    You have experienced physical abuse from a parent. That is is going to color your outlook. A long time ago, whem corporal punishment was the norm, one of the undersandings was that it could not be administered with passion. That tenet has been forgotten.

    Like

  83. I did not mean to imply any here are abusers or are advocating abuse, my apologies if it came off that way.

    Liked by 1 person

  84. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Bloom,
    In all the time I have known you, you have never given offense.

    Liked by 2 people

  85. SFC Ton says:

    Define abuse? It’s a bullshit word with a bullshit moderns definition; Everything is abuse so nothing is abuse but anyone who thinks physical corrections were not a part of keeping women in line during ye olden days (like 1960) is delusional.

    Last trooper I had who “abused” his wife came home form a field problem to $4, no food in the house, couple of kids, 11 days until payday a house full of new shit and his wife’s new tattoo. That bitch earned a fist to the fast.

    Trooper before that dragged his cheating whore…. I mean wife out the house by her hair. Whore had that coming to her as well.

    I purpose the major problem with women is they don’t get punched in the face when they are 8 and being a cunt.

    Like

  86. Tarnished says:

    Fuzzie,

    I just read back through all my comments and also did a page search, just to be sure. Never once did I use the term “abuse”, nor do I think a single slap across the face or punch to the jaw could ever be considered “a beating”. I was very careful to specifically NOT use those terms as feminazis have taken them over to define actions that they really don’t define. A lost cause, it would seem, as you and scfton seem to believe I meant them anyway… :/

    You have experienced physical abuse from a parent. That is is going to color your outlook.

    No. I’m sorry, but it does not, at least in this instance.

    I’ve tried very hard in my personal life to grow beyond what occurred with my father and with my stepfather, and always take a step back to review a situation before reacting (when possible, obviously). My past is not coloring my outlook. My ideals and morals are.

    I’m going to assume (perhaps wrongly, so apologies) that you were not routinely abused as a child or teen. Therefore, your own outlook will not be colored by anything at all. You can be the control group.

    If you were married, and did something that negatively impacted the family**, would it be acceptable for your wife to slap you? Just once, hard across the face, no beatings and no hatred or passion behind it. Just walked up to you, said “you did X wrong”, slapped you, and walked back away. You suffered no permanent damage, it might not even have left a mark and if it did it’s gone in an hour or so.

    Is this an acceptable course of action to you? Would you stay married to a woman like this, and would you still trust her the exact same amount as before she punished you physically?

    I can say that, given the exact same scenario…a non-abusive husband who would give me a single hard slap without passion behind his hand, and only when I did something that negatively impacted the family…I would leave.

    The point is not that this is “abuse”, because it is not. The point is that your SO thinks you are not a fellow adult that can admit you did something incorrectly and talk about how to fix it, but instead thinks you are a dog or child. That is why the trust would be gone. Yes, there’s the fact you might get hit again but surprisingly one can get used to this. But knowing that you’re loving and caring about a person who thinks you are so inferior that they can treat you like a 5 year old whenever they deem it necessary? Why would anyone other than a broken person stay?

    **I’m unable to give an example, as there’s no action I can think of that would warrant a physical punishment to a fellow adult I love that isn’t over the top stupid or irresponsible.**

    I’ll check back to see your response, Fuzzie, but am going to take a break from online for a while. If anyone wants to talk more one-on-one, you know how to reach me. For what it’s worth, like Bloom, I don’t think we have any abusive people here either.

    Have a good week, all.

    Like

  87. Liz says:

    “Last trooper I had who “abused” his wife came home form a field problem to $4, no food in the house, couple of kids, 11 days until payday a house full of new shit and his wife’s new tattoo. That bitch earned a fist to the fast.

    Trooper before that dragged his cheating whore…. I mean wife out the house by her hair. Whore had that coming to her as well.”

    Did they turn into nice, “normal” women after their beat downs? Or were they still giant, unstable cunts (though perhaps silent for a short time after said smack downs)? The world is not comprised of 90+ percent of women who act this way. And grown-ass women who DO act this way will NEVER be good partners, good mothers, or good people in general.

    Like

  88. SFC Ton says:

    50/50
    The money issue chick, yep for the rest of the time he was my trooper

    The whore? Who knows? They divorced against her wishes

    Sorry Liz that is the norm for women. Those examples are on the extreme end sure but normal as in shitty wives. I am old enough to remember pre DV laws and mature men with decent pimp hands and by proxy decent wives.

    I get why women hate this idea because it doesn’t speak well for women but it is the historic norm and women paid attention etc and did their duties.

    Women are not mature adults. Not necessarily kids but feminism shows they are incapable of rational adult behaviour.

    Like

  89. SFC Ton says:

    Also the biggest day to day problem with women is their lack of respect and regard. Why the lack? It isn’t beaten into them on the playground and the counties lack of corrective action as they age

    Like

  90. Liz says:

    I’ll just have to concede, Ton…I’m not going to be able to process this type of behavior as “the norm” for women.
    But I’ve never claimed to be red pill. I do agree 100 percent with the “lack of respect and regard” bit though.

    Liked by 1 person

  91. Cill says:

    .
    [WRITERS CORNER]

    Like

  92. Liz says:

    I’m going to have MY OWN SECRET MEETING damnit.
    At….er, LIZCORNER.
    😛

    Liked by 3 people

  93. Cill says:

    WRITERS CORNER is a club of stuffy old farts with newspapers and tobacco pipes muttering comments no-one wants to hear. Last I heard was one old stuffed-shirt intoning into his port something about “scheduling”…

    Liked by 2 people

  94. Cill says:

    I didn’t come up with the name “Writers Corner” BTW. I would have called it WRITERS BLOCK.

    Liked by 2 people

  95. Tarnished says:

    But I’ve never claimed to be red pill.

    Nor I. While there’s definitely some things about it that are true and good for both sexes, other parts assume too much and deny individuality. Purple pill, some would say.

    I do agree 100 percent with the “lack of respect and regard” bit though.

    People in general need to just stop it with the whole “I have a vagina/penis, ergo I deserve more than basic respect”. Um, no. You don’t. Want more than the lowest, most basic level of respect as a human being? Show why you deserve it.

    Like

  96. Cill says:

    Man, it’s good to hear from my old mate Bro Blurkel in here. One of the legendary wise men from way back. He’ll be back.

    Like

  97. After pondering this I am thinking Ton means an 8 year old girl getting popped by another 8 to girl for being a C, (lije boys settle things) but that it might *misread* he’s talking about an adult. I had to read it twice myself. Is that right, Ton?

    Liked by 1 person

  98. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I can’t remember where I saw it but, you said something a while back that made me think that your father and stepfather both beat you up without cause. That would qualify as abuse in anyone’s book.
    Now, if my theoretical wife slapped me out of the blue, I think that I would leave the house, which could very well be permanent.
    Remarks made about corporal punishment had to do with examining old school thought on the matter. It’s worth looking in to.
    As for feminists taking the concept of abuse and stretching it to cover normal activity. That is abuse in itself. I understand arguing over money is now on the list too. Of course people are going argue over allocation of limited resources. Legislatures do it all the time.
    If I said anything to hurt you, I did not mean to. Yesterday was a bad day for me. Watching that hour and a half special on Knut helped.

    Like

  99. Tarnished says:

    Fuzzie,

    Only my biological father used to hit us/throw things at us/punch holes in walls and engage in blunt emotional manipulation. My stepfather would use minor physical “punishments” like choking or threatening to/actually killing my pets every once in a while, but typically used subtle mental/emotional tactics and sexual abuse. I have posts about it on my own blog, but that’s as in depth as I’ll go here. I’m sure you understand, and no, you and I are fine.

    Feminists are crazy. Arguing isn’t abuse, every couple has disagreements. Their takeover of regular terms for their own twisted and incredibly broad uses is wrong.

    I’ve looked into some of the older laws about corporal punishment, but still can’t think of anything that would happen in my daily life that would warrant me thinking “My husband/wife needs a slap to show him/her the error of their ways”. Likewise, I’d walk out on anyone who thinks it’s permissible to do so to me. It is how I was raised by my grandparents…you simply do not harm those you care about, mentally, physically, or emotionally. If you inadvertently do, that’s on you, and it’s required that you make up for your poor decisions and rash actions ASAP.

    As I said to scfton, I realize there are very emotionally stunted and juvenile women who seem to need a daddy-husband in their lives, but they are broken. Liz stated that such females are unfit partners/mothers, and I wholeheartedly agree.

    I’m a very pleasant person to be around, and will nearly always put the needs of others before my own. During arguments my first reaction is to speak honestly but frankly, and if that doesn’t work, take a walk for an hour+ and try again when emotions are cooler. It is not in me to be violent at all, unless it’s in defense of someone. The concept of being hit by my lover/hitting him for a mere accident or mistake is very foreign and leaves a bad taste. The examples that scfton gave are so extreme that I’ve no actual idea of what a rational reaction *should* be…

    Liked by 1 person

  100. Tarnished says:

    Hmmm.
    I’ve no bubblegum on my phone. How about some flan? (Why do they have flan but not gum, anyway?)🍮🍮🍮🍮

    Liked by 1 person

  101. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    No bubble gum but flan? Someone was a good cutomer of Mexican restaurants.
    Glad that we’re Ok.

    Like

  102. Tarnished says:

    Of course we’re good, Fuzzie. Short bits of written words don’t always transfer well, anyway.

    Let’s see…I also have various Asian foods.
    🍱🍜🍛🍣🍥🍙🍚🍘

    Liked by 2 people

  103. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    Thanks for the effort. all I see at my end are little squares thanks to Vista security.
    I went to Google Chrome and saw them! Yum! thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

  104. Cill says:

    New post up.

    Like

  105. Tarnished says:

    Hooray! Food for Fuzzie while Molly is away. She feeds the bear best. 🙂

    Like

  106. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    It isw a shame thaqt there is such an age difference. I would propose. Food is important. Very important. Even more so if you’re a bear.

    Like

  107. Tarnished says:

    I always forget the ages of everyone here…
    Molly is a bit of a young one, if I recall correctly. Age makes only as much difference as you allow it (if certain biological factors like babymaking aren’t a requirement).

    How many years have you lumbered around this world, Fuzzie? I’m 20, with 11 years of experience. 😉

    Like

  108. SFC Ton says:

    Correction and discipline is not harm. Spin hamster spin

    This is about wanting freedom of action vs valuing correction, authority etc. You know the whole failed at every level modern script

    Like

  109. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    Tarn,
    I don’t think you could take Molly into a bar. As for me, when I was a little kid, I heard they wouldn’t let Nikita Khrushchev get on the rides at Disneyland. I was sad for him and thought he might be mad at us.

    Like

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