Invest for the Greatest Returns


Blurkel recently pointed out this post.

Don’t get me wrong; I love my kids and would do anything for them. But I love my husband more.

When I share this with my mom friends, it’s usually met with outrage and total shock. 

Putting aside our own needs for theirs is practically a requirement but I’m sorry, I’m just not buying it.

But, to some, the concept that kids would ever come second seems ludicrous. 

And I get it. There’s no question that the bond between a mother and child is unbreakable. But I view my investment in my relationship with my spouse as one that is beneficial to our family as a whole. Prioritizing my husband’s needs decreases our chances of getting divorced; it also increases the probability that our children will remain in a two-parent home.

I strongly believe that modeling a healthy relationship for our children sets the foundation for how they form bonds when they get older. In my opinion, my husband and I are the first example of what being in a happy marriage is like. Our kids learn how they should treat their future significant others (and what they should expect in return) by watching us.

I think that raising them in a home with parents who clearly love and value one another is key to their growth. For me, this means putting my husband first.

In a few years, our son and daughter will leave our home and when they do, I want to celebrate a job well done with my lover — not sit in a quiet house with a person who has become a stranger as a result of years of quietly drifting apart.

Let us expand and amplify upon this.  First, consider the typical fragility of the husband/wife relationship.  Parents will always love their children, but each other?  Perhaps not.

Now consider what is good for the children.  A two parent home with involved parents is a start.  So if one wants to do right by the children that they love, they should put in the extra effort that is perhaps required to make their relationship strong.  With respect to their children, the investment here might have the highest payoff (perhaps by a large amount).

But look at what often happens.  A mother’s attention is on the children, stacking on more activities (soccer (football to non Americans), softball, music, etc.) or attending to every aspect of their activity (i.e. helicopter parenting).  And when she is not doing these things, she is out making money.  What gets left out?

Probably the children do not really need all of the attention, and perhaps she does not need to work as many hours.  And maybe the time saved could be invested elsewhere with a resulting long term benefit to the children.  But could this be made to make sense to modern mothers?

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Posted in FarmBoy, Feminism, Marriage
186 comments on “Invest for the Greatest Returns
  1. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    It coulld be that women are responsing to the social consensus that men are optional if not outright unnecessaey. Wasn’t it Haerriaet Harman that spoke to this so eloquently?
    Fathers should not have to contend with society cutting them off at the knees.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Farm Boy says:

    It could be that women are responding to the social consensus that men are optional if not outright unnecessary.

    Does anybody believe that this is really true?

    Or do they just like pretending?

    Like

  3. SFC Ton says:

    The it’s for the children and children 1st families is more New age bullshit that is another utter failure

    Liked by 3 people

  4. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Farm Boy,
    If you are dealing with a herd mentality, consensus has far more weight than truth.
    I am reminded of sitting in a waiting room leafing through a couple of magazines. I think they were copies of Woman’s Day. There were only three photos of men in both magazines. Could it be that they don’t want to think about us at all? Seeing men in photos would only remind them of our existence and, that would be troubling.
    Can’t have that.
    Note that I am not referring to feminists here. That impression taken from the magazines speaks to mainstream women, housewives and mothers.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Farm Boy says:

    Seeing men in photos would only remind them of our existence and, that would be troubling.

    So why would it be troubling?

    Like

  6. Cill says:

    Farm Boy, “Invest for the Greatest Returns” is one hell of an important topic.

    I know I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating, I think. All the female descendants of my maternal great great grandmother (“Double Gran”) applied the principles she taught them – just as Double Gran herself was taught by her own mother. One of the rules was “your husband is the most important person in your life”, and “husband before children” and “you can’t give your best unless you put your relationship first.”

    All those female descendants were married by their early twenties and none have separated or divorced. I’m talking cousins, aunties, second cousins, third cousins, great aunties etc. I’ve met most of them, some much more than others of course, and some only once. All are happily married and all except the most recently married have children. I’m the first childless person in that side of my family.

    Another thing: all of them found good men. Finding good men was not an issue. Molly has already found one (a bloke I introduced actually 😉 Lucky bastard).

    Liked by 3 people

  7. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Farm Boy,
    I think that the sexes have become so socially polarized that it is hard to agree on which movie to watch.
    They don’t know what to do with us.

    Cill,
    Molly found someone? YAY! She is a treasure!
    I was thinking that she would be hard to place.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Sumo says:

    Molls found a boytoy? Cill, brother – make sure buddy knows to be good to her. Otherwise, if there’s anything left after you get through with him, The Mighty Sumo will erase him from existence.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Farm Boy,
    That our mere existence is troubling is not my position alone. It is Sargon’s conclusion at the end of this video.

    It gets real deep at the end. Watch it all the way.

    Like

  10. Cill says:

    Sumo bro, he knows me. I introduced him, which is a double responsibility on his shoulders. What would happen if he messes with my wee cuzzie? Not much left of him for you to spank, bro. Doesn’t bear thinking about. We should drink to that one. Cheers, brother Sumo.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cill,
    What you have just said is why referrals from family and friends can be so powerful. He would answer to you if he messed up.
    It tends to keep people on their best behavior.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Sumo says:

    Not much left of him for you to spank

    Figured as much. That’s why I said IF there was anything left. Mostly a symbolic gesture of bravado on my part.

    That being said, I wouldn’t hesitate to throw a beatdown on anyone who messes with my peeps. I’ve said it before, I will do whatever it takes to look after me and mine. I consider you lot to be “mine”.

    On a completely unrelated note, fuji apple sake. It’s niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice.

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Cill says:

    Sumo I like the traditional style that still happens in Japan sometimes where you kneel beside a low table and they serve sake. The best Sake is the most expensive Sake (of course) and man it’s good. Seriously good. I’ll keep an eye out for the HANA Fuji Apple Sake. Haven’t tried it yet (as far as I know – I still can’t read Japanese or should I say Chinese labels on bottles).

    The only Japanese I know is:
    Kono atari day ichiban joz des !!
    (that’s how it sounds, anyway.)

    I’m not sure what it means, but they always crack up laughing when I say that.

    Like

  14. Cill says:

    What I meant was, I’ve heard the Japanese refer to their written language as “chinese”

    Like

  15. Yoda says:


    All the female descendants of my maternal great great grandmother (“Double Gran”) applied the principles she taught them – just as Double Gran herself was taught by her own mother.

    Wisdom of the ages this is.

    https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2015/02/27/wisdom-of-the-ages/

    Like

  16. Yoda says:

    If you are dealing with a herd mentality, consensus has far more weight than truth.

    If Oprah this post endorse she did.
    Happen what it would?

    Like

  17. Yoda says:

    That impression taken from the magazines speaks to mainstream women, housewives and mothers

    Those magazines about homes and gardens they were.
    Less true today this is.
    Sad this would be.
    Celebrities a poor substitute they are.

    Like

  18. Yoda says:

    Molly found someone

    Rainbow colored he is?

    Liked by 2 people

  19. At my brother’s wedding solemnisation recently (it’s where they took vows, because they didn’t have a church wedding as the bride is not christian), the solemnisor gave a really meaningful speech with lots of advice, including that they should put each other first. He said children are very important, but u must still put each other first; think of it as your spouse being free-hold properties whereas your children are lease-hold properties.

    I do think such a philosophy makes sense, but context does matter here. So this is assuming the spouse is a good partner and a good parent (not an abusive one, for eg). If not, not only should you not have married the person, u have to put your child as the first priority because Someone’s got to, your kid deserves a shot in life and without at least one good parent, the kid doesn’t have much of a chance.

    If the kid has 2 good loving parents, though, the kid will be just fine with the 2 of u putting each other first. However, in the future when I’m a wife and mom, I don’t think I’d wanna consciously/mentally put either of them first. I just don’t really see the need to…?

    Like

  20. I do agree with Farm Boy though that some women really take their helicopter parenting to the extreme. I’m not so sure that this is always -really- putting kids first though, sometimes I sense a selfishness in this, it’s like how they want a perfect home, a perfect coffee table, a perfect wardrobe, a perfect guest bedroom, etc and a perfect kid to complete the picture. They’re all very nice to show off at gatherings.

    Like

  21. Yoda says:

    I sense a selfishness in this, it’s like how they want a perfect home, a perfect coffee table, a perfect wardrobe, a perfect guest bedroom, etc and a perfect kid to complete the picture. They’re all very nice to show off at gatherings.

    Work hard to impress people that they like not they do.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. BuenaVista says:

    Children are crippled by stifling, helicopter parenting. And male children, who are required to tiptoe through college now managing their brutal propensity to rape, advance the patriarchy, and toss around microaggressions like candy in a Shriner parade, emerge at 22 — never having done some of the things I was doing at 12.

    It’s another RP truism, and thus a cliche I guess: But I have always found the social excuse (“I’m just so busy with the children, and besides my libido changed after I gave birth”) to just be an enormous sack of duplicitous shit. Obviously the wife is a) disinterested a priori in her husband; or b) giving in to social and religious anti-sex attitudes (i.e., just being lazy, and claiming higher virtue). So the selfishness of the duty-sex practicing wife, destructive of the family while smothering the children so that they enter adulthood as infantile drones, is staggering. Some honesty would go along way, such as “It turns out I married you for provisioning, so know, ewwww, I don’t feel like touching it again tonight.” At least then the dopey husband has at least a theoretical possibility of waking up and taking care of sexual matters with someone else, who values him as a man instead of a chore-playing ATM.

    I have an interesting relationship building with my trainer (I am strength training with a young guy who is a graduate of one of better strength and conditioning programs — Iowa football and wrestling — in the USA. I actually puked this morning, and fell down once from complete loss of motor control — front squats — though I didn’t tell him about last night’s indulgences in fancy rye.)

    He’s 26 and no prude. He’s getting married to what seems to be a great girl in 10 days. He’s charmingly amused by some of my tales of the dark side. So I told him one this morning. This way I get another 60 seconds to attempt to recover from his barbell, medicine ball, ropes and elastic band sadism.

    Yesterday, I walked into the office of some dumpy stockbroker, who had accused his wife of restarting an affair with me that we zealously shut down last fall. It’s the classic situation where she married him for security and now can’t stand to be around him; natch, he offloads all responsibility for his emotional, intellectual and sexual ineptitude, and wants to guilt-trip his wife into becoming a different person — you know, one who is equally emotionally, intellectually and sexually impoverished.

    Of course, he wasn’t expecting me and about pissed in his pants. I just said, and I guess his secretary overheard me, “You can fault me all you want for what happened last fall, but I am *not* fucking your wife and have *not* since you busted her, so wake the fuck up if you want to salvage your marriage.” She’s way out of his league and this sad puppy prefers to blame her because, even when they were sleeping together, she couldn’t get off without a toy. I really can’t imagine being so stupid, but there you are.

    Readers Digest version:

    I said to my trainer, “Well, of course she married for security and so of course that is on her, but it turns out that security is not enough.”

    Trainer: “Yeah, but it’s normal after children for women to lose interest in sex.”

    “Actually, I find it’s the opposite. After children most women I know want to be validated sexually, and trust me, they are not shy about it at all. The ones who say otherwise are just not attracted to their men, or are fucked up in the head and more interested in food and tv. So if you take that attitude into your marriage, in about five years, or whenever it is you find yourselves raising your 2.1 children, you’re going to have major issues. And an athlete like you is going to be climbing the walls.”

    I don’t talk red pill with him (or anyone) directly. But this got his attention. I believe this Women and Children First meme is accepted uncritically by 90% of the population. Certainly it dominates any popular culture expression of bourgeois household dynamics.

    Liked by 4 people

  23. Yoda says:

    BV here he is.
    Good this would be.

    Liked by 4 people

  24. This is very true, putting the kids first before the parent relationship is not good for either. As the quoted article says, somehow saying that today leads to people looking at you like you have sprouted two heads!

    Congrats to Molly! Tell us about him, Cill!

    Liked by 1 person

  25. missattempts says:

    Oh no. Kids MUST COME first! A divorced woman MUST NOT remarry!
    The step father will ABUSE the woman’s prior children. Men do NOT want to
    support other men’s children, or resent having to do it. Like Tarn’s step father who
    abused her.
    If the step father is black, kiss the white children good bye, especially if they are male.
    If the step daughter is white, she has her “uses.” Like that YOU-tube video of the
    14 year old blond roughing up the boy and using Jamacian insults. I’m sure her
    step dad lives in BLISS. He doesn’t have to go his own way.

    Like

  26. Cill says:

    Bloom, Molly has been living in town for a while but she arrived here last night – to keep an eye on me, I think (she worries too much). Anyway, she’s deep in the land of nod (it’s 3:30 a.m. here) so I guess I’ll have to try to describe the bloke for you. Hang on while I gather my faculties…

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Choicy says:

    Hell Cillo, it’s not polite to keep a lady hanging around for yonks, mate. Bloom, if the joker is who I think it is, he’s the man who put the “C” on crocodile, right Cillo?

    Like

  28. Cill says:

    Spot on, Choice. Good buggar, eh.

    Like

  29. Choicy says:

    Yeah he is. I’ll explain it for Bloom. “Good buggar, eh” is the best praise of a man in Kiwi speech. I define it as simply the best. In Aussie we would say “bloody good joker”.

    I concur Cillo mate.

    Liked by 1 person

  30. Choicy says:

    I’m about to crash. Tell Molly I’ll call her on the phone in the morning. Good night friendly people of Spawny town.

    Liked by 1 person

  31. Missattempts I do appreciate the concern, and it is true that some men do abuse their step children, but it’s certainly not always the case. There are many good stepdads, too. Not all men are rapists and abusers! Absolutely I agree overlooking abuse is not part of putting the marriage first, bio parent or step parent.

    Liked by 1 person

  32. Cill says:

    Good night Choicy. Yeah I’ll pass that on to Molly in a few hours.

    Bloom, there was interest at first sight. I felt the electricity between them pretty soon after. I know these women. He’s an outdoor type, raised in the country, good hunter and sailor.
    Mid to late twenties, well off, fit, healthy. Best of all he’s a bloody good bloke, sound as a bell. Heh, in claiming Molly’s full attention he’s broken a few hearts.

    Liked by 1 person

  33. thedeti says:

    “She’s way out of his league and this sad puppy prefers to blame her because, even when they were sleeping together, she couldn’t get off without a toy. I really can’t imagine being so stupid, but there you are.”
    ______________________

    Once again:

    Most women in today’s society are married to men to whom they are less attracted than the men they used to have sex with before they married.

    As you said, BV: Alpha fux, beta bux, then back to alpha fux.

    Liked by 2 people

  34. Cill says:

    Yoda your link to https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2015/02/27/wisdom-of-the-ages/
    I followed the link out of idle curiosity. We had bloody good fun back then, eh? We still do, I reckon.

    Like

  35. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Missattempts,
    I would think that stepfathers would make easy targets.

    BuenaVista,
    I had to ask why you got involved witha married woman? From the stories that I have heard, it’s not always the husband that is the last to know, a lot of times it’s the guy that bad wife is messing with.

    Deti,
    It could well be that hese women are hoping for the best when they marry but, they have ruined themselves for anything but short term. They want the idealized combination of all the other men.

    Like

  36. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Bloom,
    Missattepts does bring up a point that may be working against you.
    I have seen a post warning men to not become stepfathers. A double caution to families with daughters that are too old to form the father/daughter dynamic. If there is a conflict, right or wrong, the stepfather will have to go.
    I am not saying that this will happen. It’s just another hazard to be aware of.

    Like

  37. Yoda says:

    Let’s understand what happened here. This Christian jeweler agreed to custom-make engagement rings for a lesbian couple, knowing that they were a couple, and treated them politely. But when they found out what he really believed about same-sex marriage, even though the man gave them polite service, and agreed to sell them what they asked for, the lesbian couple balked, and demanded their money back — and the mob threatened the business if they didn’t yield. Which, of course, he did.

    Liked by 1 person

  38. BuenaVista says:

    Fuzzie, I knew. I’ve known her since before her second marriage, though she was engaged when we met. Our first, and every subsequent, conversation was electric. She’s the most beautiful woman within 100 miles, imo. (Well, over 40.) Because of my lifestyle at the time, and my appearance, she says, she assumed I was just a player and she was hellbent on getting hitched to a predictable provisioner.

    I would stop in to see her every three months or so. She would make me lunch after her place closed, ask me truly empathetic questions about my life. Being a Good Man, I never sexualized our conversation. Being an ex-CEO, I know how not to EVER betray sexual interest in a woman. She says she never knew I was attracted to her. Unwittingly, she (now married) gradually became convinced I was not a player. For example, I’ve been married 25 years, all told, and have always expressed a lot of pride in that, if not the aftermath when I have been drawn and quartered in divorce court. (When your ex-wife or ex-girlfriend is an alpha widow, she’s going to make sure (if she can) no other woman gets the goods.)

    As you know, I had some existential health issues last year. As soon as I could I drove the 60 miles to say hello. She was revolted by my conditions, and got very angry. Three years ago I would have been flummoxed, and whined a lot about her lack of sympathy. Post-RP, I knew: She had an image of me as healthy, youthful and strong. Not with scars on my face and hands, and hands that shook like a drunk’s; a sling, a limp, and a figure that had lost 30 pounds. I withdrew as quickly as possible: I know, alas, that our women value strength, not vulnerability. I wanted comfort; she wanted her image of me.

    Three months later I was headed up to Minneapolis for some of that urban recreation, and I asked if she could point me to a good wine store in her resort community (I live in a tough, tough, tough prairie industrial town now; no wine stores). I needed a couple of bottles to take to my friends who were putting me up this time. Oh, was she furious. She totally lost her shit. She blew me off. Pre-RP, I would have queried her on her odd response to a simple request from a casual friend, and maybe become indignant. Post-RP, I knew she was jealous, thinking I was trolling her prior to some hot date, and I knew she was infatuated with me. So of courseI ignored her. I didn’t hear from her for two weeks.

    Two weeks later I was sitting in my truck in a certain midwestern capital at 5 a.m., drinking convenience store coffee, and preparing to go home after an art buying foray. She calls me. “Did you get my email?” “Sorry, I don’t even check it anymore.” “Check it.”

    She’d written me a letter offering me a long-term, compartmentalized affair. She acknowledged I’ll never marry again. She stated she needed my emotional presence in her life, but it would remain closeted and safe. She took full responsibility for the overture and sin and consequences.

    Well. I believe in love at first sight, and I’d been in love with her for six years. A few months before I’d have five tubes and wires coming out of my person; nothing like terrified nurses to tell you: You’re about to croak! So I said yes.

    Three months after we began she made sure her husband found out, in order to force the crisis, and said, “I will leave him if you marry me.” That was not what she proposed, was it. 2.5 of those three months were happier than anything I’ve known in 20 years. But once again, RP proves out: I’m supposed to do the drafthorse jig again, if I pine for love. Nix.

    So that, Mr. Fuzz, is why I had an affair with a married chick. The Red Pill is bitter for romantic men, as Rollo recently noted. The Red Pill knows too much.

    Liked by 3 people

  39. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    BuenaVista,
    Before, the reason for me staying away from married women had to do with emotional investment. I’m single and likely to invest. Married women would be playing to play. You have given me a whole new thing to consider-monkey branching.
    I can see how women get away with so much evil. Men are motivated by lust to the point where they are not even conscious of it.
    When you sw her husband, did you make him aware of his wife’s treachery? He is going to need a good attorney.

    Liked by 1 person

  40. BuenaVista says:

    His wife gave him everything he wanted. She wasn’t treacherous. She was dying in a desert and wanted a glass of water.

    And he won’t need a good attorney, because the world will agree with you: a treacherous woman deserves punishment. So she’ll be torn apart because she’s a girl and didn’t know that ‘security’ — which everyone told a 40-something she should prize — is an element, not an achievement per se, that all women of a certain age should grab at any cost.

    Men have obligations in marriage. The first one is to be a man. The second one is to fuck her blind. The third one is to keep the lights on. The fourth one is to be conversational and interesting and developmental, internally. This is not rocket science, except to the blue pill drones.

    Fuzzie, you have a lot of opinions about stuff you haven’t lived.

    Liked by 2 people

  41. Cill says:

    “Fuzzie, you have a lot of opinions about stuff you haven’t lived.”

    His main offense is that he has not played rugby.

    Like

  42. BuenaVista says:

    Actually, I think it’s the 2,320 bear videos. But others may disagree.

    Like

  43. Cill says:

    Built like a bear, he’d be a loose head prop.

    Like

  44. Sumo says:

    Fuzzie, you have a lot of opinions about stuff you haven’t lived.

    I’ve never been bitten by a great white shark, but I know I don’t want to be.

    Like

  45. Cill says:

    The mighty Sumo ain’t beat that easily. A leopard’s paw to the shark’s throat, and it would all be over, bro.

    Liked by 1 person

  46. Cill says:

    BuenaVista played rubgy and trained the best way. The same way I trained. I put many an hour of effort into it. No pain no gain. I played on the blindside flank.

    Like

  47. Yoda says:

    A scrum by himself a bear would be.

    Like

  48. Yoda says:

    Actually, I think it’s the 2,320 bear videos. But others may disagree.

    Bear videos good they would be.
    Too human-centric this site is.

    Like

  49. Sumo says:

    Cill, brother, I never said I wouldn’t win, but the cost/benefit analysis isn’t worth it. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  50. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    BuenaVista,
    To hear you tell it, they are falling out of the sky to land at your feet. Once they get your attention, they all prove tobe deeply flawed. I’d rather hear about how good they are.
    This is not encouraging.
    By the way, is anyone forcing you to watch the bear videos?

    Like

  51. Cill says:

    I hear you brother! You make a valid point there.

    Like

  52. Cill says:

    BuenaVista played rugby which makes him a candidate for honorary Kiwi. I’d shout him a Speights Southern Man any day of the week. Also the particular part of North America from which he hails is known by Kiwis to be populated with good blokes.

    Liked by 1 person

  53. Cill says:

    …and Fuzzy plays us good bear vids. My favorite is the one where the bear foolishly challenges Planet Earth to a head-butting contest. Play us that one Fuzzy

    Like

  54. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Here you go, Cill!

    Liked by 2 people

  55. Cill says:

    I think it was Farm Boy who once remarked, the trampoline bounce was the Beta Bux part, and the head butt was the Alpha Fux.

    Liked by 1 person

  56. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    I don’t think it was about AFBB. I think that our poor, young bear got the “let’s just be friends” line one too many times.
    There aren’t enough NAWALTs out there. If we don’t watch out, we’ll blink and they will all be PPPs.

    Like

  57. Cill says:

    You could be right there, Fuzzy, but Farm Boy had a good point too. The head butt was a pretty comprehensive Alpha Fux IMHO.

    Like

  58. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cill,
    i mentioned it to Spawny once. Maybe it deserves repeating. We don’t play “alpha male of the group” here. There is no need for heirarchy.

    Liked by 1 person

  59. Cill says:

    “We don’t play “alpha male of the group” here”
    Explain.

    Like

  60. BuenaVista says:

    Fuzzie, everything is earned in this life. Nothing “falls at our feet.” Everyone is flawed. I have no problem shutting up and going away. As for the bear vids, carry on.

    Like

  61. Hi BV, been a while. I’m glad the healing continues from such a shattering event. Onwards and upwards.

    I’m surprised that you’re surprised to get a reaction to her having an affair. Hopefully hubby wises up and divorces her arse. I don’t see his marriage coming back from her infidelity.

    But you said something that surprised me. That she’d suffer in divorce due to her actions. That’s how it should be (imho, fwiw), but not how I thought it was. Are you talking about a state without no-fault divorce? If there is such a thing(?)

    Like

  62. Bear vids are Fuzzie’s quirk. No problem with that. Mine is writing posts about pommie politics on a blog where I’m the only pommie…that no one reads (pommies and posts)

    We got the best result on offer (mo’ UKIP MPs would have been even better), but there was some schadenfreude topping to it; the leftie outrage and disbelief that the electorate wasn’t buying a return of the same unreformed fucking clowns that were unconvincingly ejected in 2010. Some people said that 2010 started the job that 2015 finished. Labour is predictably, repetitiously debating too left vs not left enough. They are really in the shit. 🙂

    Like

  63. Cill says:

    Come on Fuzzy

    Like

  64. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    BuenaVista,
    You are wanted here as a commenter. We don’t get into fights here.
    I am sorry for giving offense.

    Liked by 2 people

  65. Sumo says:

    We don’t play “alpha male of the group” here.

    Oh sure, NOW you tell me…

    Liked by 3 people

  66. I understand Fuzzie. That may well not be BV’s intent, but it isn’t hard to perceive it that way. Somebody commented somewhere recently about it being an American cultural phenomenon, i think that’s too harsh. I reckon that American culture is just more openly competitive. For the men anyway. Women do it surreptitiously all round the world.

    The somewhere might be AlphaGame. Probably on the MGTOW thread where Ton kicked arse and my two belated comments never appeared. Given their nature, I don’t think the canning was deliberate. I doubt that uncanning comments from atheist mgtows is a priority either, though.

    Like

  67. This was the second comment’s payload

    Like

  68. Just found a meta-Downfall-parody

    Like

  69. Cill says:

    It is as I thought, then.

    Like

  70. No one is more surprised by that than me, Cill

    Like

  71. You being right about something, I mean 😉

    Like

  72. Cill says:

    Anyway I’m going to go back to enjoying myself. An explanation would have been appreciated but to hell with it.

    Too many good people here.

    Brother Sumo, hadn’t you heard? Stop playing alpha, ya hear bro?

    Like

  73. Predictably
    http://www.breitbart.com/london/2015/05/22/traditionalists-silenced-in-irish-gay-marriage-vote/

    As the progressives are relentless, what are they going to come up with next?

    I heard one saying that the poll was purely about marriage, not about X (which I didn’t catch). Bet you the next issue is X. Predictable as the tides. The sheeple fall for it every time. It’s how religion was castrated as a social force.

    Like

  74. Cill says:

    “As the progressives are relentless, what are they going to come up with next?” There is no limit to the farce, which makes my farcical scenario seem less far-fetched than before:

    https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2015/05/07/the-sjws-and-fembots-are-about-to-own-you-people/

    Liked by 1 person

  75. Sumo says:

    Brother Sumo, hadn’t you heard? Stop playing alpha, ya hear bro?

    Probably be easier to ask me to stop cooking.

    Liked by 3 people

  76. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cill,
    My fault. AMOGing would be fosturing, playing for one-upmanship, or picking fight to se who will back down.
    We don’t do that here. I’d rather watch funny bear videos.

    Like

  77. Cill says:

    I was not building hierarchies either. I’ve been back over it and there’s not even a hint of that. We don’t do that here either, or at least I don’t.

    Like

  78. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cill,
    You don’t.
    It does seem to be a popular thinf on the internet. I am thinking of the kittten looking in a mirror and seeing a lion meme.

    Like

  79. Cill says:

    The Prime Minister of NZ is pragmatic but naive politically. He keeps putting his foot in it. Did you hear of the Ponytail-pulling furore? The P.M. attempts to distract us with proposals for a new Kiwi flag.

    Thank God we have an excellent Minister of Finance – the real strength of this government.

    Like

  80. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Pulling on a ponytail? As scandals go, isn’t that a little small?
    The press has gotten silly. That is, feminist writers have gone silly.

    Liked by 1 person

  81. Cill says:

    Yeah the media is mostly loopy liberal here. We’ve got the loony left in politics too. Holy strewth though, reading Spawny’s political posts has been a real eye opener for me. I had no idea the U.K. had gotten that bad. An aspect of it that could never happen here is the Rotherham Muslim sex slave scandal. It would be more likely to happen in Australia than here but even then… no. Blood would flow. Also I hadn’t realized that women such as Harriet Harmen aren’t just sideshow freaks, they actually represent an official anti-male philosophy ideology. Anti-male ideology exists here too, but not in the form of overt public policy.

    Liked by 1 person

  82. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    I can’t imagine Rotherham happening here either.
    I don’t know what feminism has done there to enjoy so much sucess. Maybe Spawny will tell us.

    Like

  83. Choicy says:

    Sumo you said “I wouldn’t hesitate to throw a beatdown on anyone who messes with my peeps”. That would be you and me both, mate, at least where Cillo and family are concerned. I’d be in like a hairy dog.

    Liked by 2 people

  84. Cill says:

    I’m starting to think I didn’t need to put so much work into my security here. All I need is you two wild buggars, Sumo and Choicy.

    Liked by 3 people

  85. Choicy says:

    A quick word before I retire for the night. I think it would be a shame if you dropped the political posts Spawny. I drop in on them after a hard day’s yakka and it’s not often I put in a comment before I hit the sack, I’m that much nackered at the end of the day. I would miss them mate. I’m fair tuckered out. Goodnight

    Liked by 4 people

  86. @bv I understand you love and are emotionally attached to this woman, so naturally you see her side of things. But I think what fuzzie was trying to say was (and excuse me fuzzie if I am wrong here) but her husband probably thought he got lucky, all that stockbroker ing work paid off w his out of his league wife. He didn’t get the rp. She didnt get the rp either. But from an outsiders view, and not knowing the whole story, it sounds like she broke the vows not him, she broke the promise. Sure her hamster rationalized all that, but from 10,000 feet he’s the victim of the two. Unless there is abuse or something not mentioned. But if it is just she married him minus attraction then regretted it and had an affair bc she needed the “tingles” well… And I am not judging her or trying to be confrontational or anything, just saying how her actions may be the afbb rp script, but that still doesn’t make her choices “right.” If that makes sense??? I truly think were you to be her phase 3.0 it would not be good for you… As for a fair divorce settlement, does she deserve half of what he brought to the table? Or just half of what’s come to the table since signing on the line? How much of all that did she bring to the table? (Rhetorical questions, no need to answer, except for your own pondering…) and once again, I don’t mean to offend and my apologies if this is out of line.

    Liked by 1 person

  87. Cill says:

    I never liked “This”, as a way of responding positively to someone’s comment.
    It’s herd posing as chic.

    But I’m going to break my own rules. I’m making history here, me This-ing something:

    Choicy at 6:50 am.
    This.

    Liked by 3 people

  88. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    More on Bahar Mustafa the diversity officer who likes #killallwhitemen. Lots of linked youtube videos.
    https://toysoldier.wordpress.com/2015/05/23/police-investigating-bahar-mustafa-over-her-killallwhitemen-hashtag/

    Liked by 1 person

  89. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cill,
    I can see why. J had to scrollback to read his comment again.

    Like

  90. Cill says:

    Fuzzy link at 7:32 am: ” It is little more than misandrist, racist, classist, heterophobic bigotry buttered in pompous language and topped with a dollop of entitled faux-victimhood. Why anyone would take this nonsense seriously defies all reason. It is transparent as air in its stupidity.”

    Heh. “defies all reason” yes it does, but that’s just chic according to the rules of a muddle-headed, mad-arsed, play-with-ya-diddle, white female-snot-gobbling nipple-flouncing twat-tweaking unsleepingly-malevolent totally-fucked-up feminism.

    Like

  91. Cill says:

    It’s rugger-watching time for me here with my mates. Hurricans vs Waratahs. So long for now.

    Like

  92. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cill,
    “Rugger watching” is rugby watching. My first instinct was to think of”rugratwatching”, which would be keeping an eye on little ones.
    Tears ago, at my Dad’s, my brother, his son, my Dad, and myself were watching something on TV. At the commercial break, I thought to do a “kid check”. Three year old nephew was on the other side of the surronding balcony looking backat us with a big grin from one floor up. I got up calmly and carefully collected him.

    Liked by 2 people

  93. Spawny Get says:

    Cill,
    I made a few comments about the new flag proposals for the Feminist Republic of Kiwistan. During your refractory period, or when you just pissed off for a while…whichever it was…

    https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2015/05/15/foolish-friday/comment-page-1/#comment-23223

    Like

  94. Cill says:

    Fuzzy, there but for the grace of god go I, especially when I’m about to become engrossed in rugger. That kid was goddamn lucky that you noticed him (or was he a mischievous little nipper like I used to be, more in control of the “risk” situation than the grown-ups were?)

    Liked by 2 people

  95. Spawny Get says:

    I think that part of why the Rotherham and other cities is being covered low key by the press is because the establishment has a parallel problem with paedo accusations through the political class, the media that they mixed with, the judiciary that refused to try cases like ‘Janner’…

    Now a New Post

    Liked by 1 person

  96. @spawny thanks for sharing that video, all well put — if sjw action pays off, the return to the Salem Witch Trial, or dark ages burning people at the stake style justice is the result. People ask how such atrocities were allowed to occur? And sadly the answer is bc the herd allowed it, and worse, demanded it. Scary thought, that… Trial by Facebook “likes?

    It also creates a era of “do gooders” who think they are morally right, that being a tattle tale to authorities makes them “good.” for example, I live in a rural area but on the corner of a rather busy country road. Unless there is a burn ban bc it’s too dry (summer) or because of air quality, burning brush piles is legal, with a permit and some safety precautions (the pile is smaller than 10×10 feet, you have a hose to the pile, a shovel, the fire is attended, etc.) I have the permit and the safety stuff in order. But somehow it almost never fails that w/I five minutes, some sjw has called to report my fire and here comes the fire truck, sirens on, the check it out. Of course only to go back to the station after finding out its all legit. What a waste of resources. And I wouldn’t doubt, the do gooder has already reported how they just did so on Facebook, and the real thing they crave – admiration from watching how many “likes” they get.

    Beware dear folk, beware the mob rule, the “report thy neighbor rather than stop and ask if you are so concerned” mentality. Tis a mighty slippery slope…

    Like

  97. BuenaVista says:

    We still burn out our ditches and our winter cover crops, Bloom. No fire trucks. Solution: move to Iowa, Bloom!

    On your other comment, sure, vows were broken. I broke my own vow, of a different sort, and I am the only trinitarian in the room. Arguably I am the true criminal.

    But there’s a reason a good country pastor, oh, 150 years ago, examined the betrothed and had a heart-to-heart with the trembling new husband. Some had to be counseled that his bride required attentions. “Love, cherish and honor” means more than “you’re mine, and don’t you forget it.” So I think three people, not two, failed badly here.

    We drive on. Also, I lack any ability to sympathize with inept pussies who imprison their women in a lifetime of righteous isolation.

    For most people (I am not one of them) sex is a metaphor for the intimacies of conversation, thought, and amusement. Absent any intimacies of any sort, they presume that a fine house and car reflect achievement. No wonder then that fallen people (we are all fallen) look into the sky and either seek a quiet, respectable obliteration. Or break their vows in a few moments of desperate longing.

    Liked by 3 people

  98. Cill says:

    I just watched a great game of rugby get destroyed by useless fucking touch judges. All is lost.

    Like

  99. SFC Ton says:

    Never saw the point in learning Japanese…. or Spanish, or hajji or Portuguese or…. I mean everybody speaks English with a M4 pointed at their face.

    I have to say, my short visit to Japan was all positive interactions with the locals. Didn’t much care for a lot of things, all revolving around it being Tokyo, but the folks were very cool.

    What’s the point in playing amog games when I am around? Everyone else is playing for second place……

    Liked by 3 people

  100. Farm Boy says:

    What’s the point in playing amog games when I am around? Everyone else is playing for second place……

    Well, you know that Yoda is a Jedi.

    Liked by 1 person

  101. thedeti says:

    @ Fuzzie:

    “It could well be that these women are hoping for the best when they marry but, they have ruined themselves for anything but short term. They want the idealized combination of all the other men.”

    You said this in response to my remark to BV’s description of his married tryst. I said most women are men to whom they are less attracted than the men they used to sleep with pre-marriage.

    There are a lot of reasons for this. You touched on two: 1) Alpha widowhood; and 2) unrealistic expectations causing heightened taste for alpha.

    The other reasons are:

    3. Getting older and less attractive

    4. Being unable to “pull” more attractive men

    5. Baby rabies, the drive to procreate

    6. The desire for the status of marriage

    7. The drive for security

    8. The belief that sex will take on less importance to both her spouse and to her as they get older

    9. The belief that she has “outgrown” her need for attractive men and her need to be attractive to attractive men

    Of these I think men underestimate most the female drive toward motherhood and security. A woman begins to feel these drives very, very hard in her late 20s. Most women by age 30 or 31 go into full-on DEFCON 5 panic mode if they haven’t locked down halfway decent, marely suitable men and started working on getting pregnant.

    I think that women experience the drive to get pregnant in a way that is similar to the sex drive of a man in his late teens or early 20s — they think about it all the time; it is all-consuming to the point of stupid and short-sighted decisionmaking. I think more than a few marriage decisions are driven by women marrying the nearest interested man and quickly pushing out a baby.

    The drive for security is similar. We men don’t experience a drive for security like women do. We just don’t. We do our thing, and security just comes. We are much better able to provide for our own security and safety than a woman is able to do the same for herself. She instinctively understands that she wants, she NEEDS, a man to do that for her and give that to her. Hence BV’s apt description of what a woman needs in a husband: First, be a man and keep the lights on (security); second, fuck her good (procreation).

    Liked by 1 person

  102. thedeti says:

    barely, not “marely”

    Like

  103. @ bv Iowa eh? I have visited and found it charming in a 1950s era way. Good folk, good food, and all the blue antique mason jars I could fit into a suitcase. Oh the antiques there…everywhere! And for a song. I did like it. Afton, I believe it was called…saw the actual bridges of Madison County too!

    I understand why affairs happen, I am not trying to judge. It’s a tough situation for all involved for sure.

    Like

  104. Spawny Get says:

    “I think that women experience the drive to get pregnant in a way that is similar to the sex drive of a man in his late teens or early 20s — they think about it all the time; it is all-consuming to the point of stupid and short-sighted decisionmaking. I think more than a few marriage decisions are driven by women marrying the nearest interested man and quickly pushing out a baby.”

    Oh wow! What a comparison. I wonder if the comparison is valid? I am tempted to think that it is

    Liked by 2 people

  105. Yoda says:

    Oh wow! What a comparison. I wonder if the comparison is valid? I am tempted to think that it is

    Write a post about it you should.

    Like

  106. thedeti says:

    Re: BV’s unfortunate adventure.

    I can see all sides of this, believe me. Buena Vista’s story is familiar, and illustrates the following, at least to me:

    1. it is foolhardy and wishful thinking for a woman aging out of her SMV and into her 30s to believe that sex will be less important as she gets older. It is foolhardy for her to marry a man she’s only “meh” about, in a misguided fantasy that sex “just won’t be all that important anymore”. It is that important, and it will continue to be. She is only fooling herself if she thinks she will “grow into” attraction to a man she’s not all that into. (She probably won’t.) She is only fooling herself if she believes it won’t matter all that much if she doesn’t “become attracted”. (It will matter. A lot.) And she will make her husband’s life a living hell.

    2. Repeating BV: A husband needs to be a man, have and live his mission, and fuck his woman good. In this last point he needs to be a man and take what is his. That doesn’t mean rape; it does mean he needs to stake out his “territory” and insist on owning what is his.

    3. If a man cannot or will not do the things in (2) above, his wife will be at best unhappily married.

    4. It takes a hell of a lot of deep, deep misery and unhappiness for most women to cheat on their husbands. (If BV’s erstwhile paramour had not been so deeply miserable, she would not have approached BV. For women, sexual infidelity is the last resort, the final nail in the coffin, and doesn’t happen without a shit ton of dissatisfaction and disillusionment in the marriage.)

    5. An over-40 married woman who gets into an extramarital sexual affair is doing so for two reasons, in this order: (a) she hopes to find a replacement husband; and (b) to prove to herself she’s “still got it”; to self-validate and affirm her sexual attractiveness; and to prove she can still command the attentions of an attractive man. The sex and its recreational/”fun” aspect is decidedly secondary. It isn’t about the sex so much as it’s about the emotional connection and validating her self-worth and self-esteem.

    6. Specific to BV and his paramour: She was making a play to replace her husband. She genuinely cared about BV. She acted treacherously, but only toward BV, in my opinion. My guess is she has been vocal and demonstrative to her husband about her dissatisfaction.

    7. Both BV and his paramour knew exactly what they were getting into. They knew and understood the risks. In BV’s case the woman offered one thing and then, 2.5 months in, abruptly changed the rules by disclosing the affair to her husband and then laying an ultimatum on BV. She changed the entire complexion of the arrangement by expressing desires that weren’t part of the original “deal”.

    8. Between the two participants, the prime risk of an extramarital affair like this is the same as any other boyfriend/girlfriend relationship: At some point the wants and needs of both parties diverge. One person wants something more or different than the other is willing or able to give. There’s a breakup and someone always ends up getting hurt.

    Liked by 1 person

  107. Cill says:

    “During your refractory period, or when you just pissed off for a while…whichever it was”

    No. It was a case of having to work for a living.

    Like

  108. Spawny Get says:

    “Write a post about it you should.”

    It would be pure speculation on my part. I can remember doing stupid stuff (not the least getting married) to get sexual access. I haven’t seen da raby babies up close.

    *cough* Deti *cough could write such a post…please

    Liked by 2 people

  109. thedeti says:

    deti: “I think that women experience the drive to get pregnant in a way that is similar to the sex drive of a man in his late teens or early 20s — they think about it all the time; it is all-consuming to the point of stupid and short-sighted decisionmaking. I think more than a few marriage decisions are driven by women marrying the nearest interested man and quickly pushing out a baby.”

    Spawny; “Oh wow! What a comparison. I wonder if the comparison is valid? I am tempted to think that it is”
    ___________________________

    Let me clarify here. I’m drawing a comparison here between (1) the “pregnancy drive” and baby rabies of women of around age 30; and (2) the sex drive of men in their late teens and early 20s.

    Consider how we men experience this. The drive to “get it in” and have sex is incredibly strong. The need for sexual release is so powerful that men will do almost anything to get it. The average 18 year old man thinks about sex every 30 to 60 seconds or so. Within 5 minutes and without even thinking about it, he can size up an entire room of women and separate out the few “definitely nots” from the rest of the “yes I would fuck her” women. If an even halfway-decently attractive woman presents herself as available for sex, he is titanium-rod hard and ready to fuck in less than 15 seconds.

    Dudes will get drunk and sleep with a fugly. They’ll be so hard up they’ll sleep with a woman they have no intention of ever seeing again, and lie about it. They will promise love. They will promise a “relationship”. “Sure, I’ll respect you in the morning.” They’ll take her out for breakfast in the morning, give her the full-on “girlfriend” treatment. They’ll stop hanging out with their male friends. They’ll defer to her. They’ll supplicate to her and pedestalize her.

    I think it is the same for an unmarried woman of around 27 to 32, with no children. She wants to have children so badly she can taste it. She will do anything necessary to get pregnant. She’ll engage in fraud, deceit and subterfuge. She’ll retrieve a used condom and insert the semen into her vagina post-coitus. She’ll lie about her past. She’ll misrepresent her domestic abilities. She’ll claim she’s “reformed”, that she’s “done with the games and the players”, that she “wants to do it the right way this time”. She’ll marry a man she is barely attracted to sexually, but who has other things like a steady job and some money in the bank, because she absolutely has GOT to get started on a “family”.

    Like

  110. Spawny Get says:

    “No. It was a case of having to work for a living.”

    Sympathies. Though i doubt it was uninteresting or poorly remunerated.

    Liked by 1 person

  111. Spawny Get says:

    “She’ll engage in fraud, deceit and subterfuge.”

    Good point. Come to think of it, the girlfriend before the one I married did try the ‘oops, I might be preggers’ (she wasn’t). I can’t say for sure that it was about babies because I was out of there like a whippet as soon as the negative test result came in (I didn’t believe she was preggo). If I hadn’t have left, I reckon there would very soon have been a real ‘oops’. It was a dry run in order to test my response. The one I married was much better looking, but ultimately as nutty (maybe moreso).

    Liked by 2 people

  112. thedeti says:

    Also, consider the parallel in sexual market value between the late teens/early 20s man, and the over-40 woman.

    Most men of this age are sexually invisible. They are unattractive to most women unless they are extremely good looking (which most men aren’t). They don’t know very much. They don’t have worldly wisdom or life experience. They don’t have any interesting stories to tell or valuable things to give a woman. They have little money. They have almost nothing to offer a woman. And yet, their sexual desire is a raging bonfire.

    Most over-40 women (probably around 60%) have used up, sexed out, or aged out of almost all of their sexual market value. They’re not anywhere nearly as good looking as they were at 25. The only thing of value such a woman has to offer a man is her body (unless she’s married to said man). As they lose SMV, most women become sexually invisible, much like the average 18 year old man.

    That said, there are a growing number of women who are retaining a fair amount of SMV into their 40s, and can do it as long as they take care of themselves while younger. The other factor driving the increased sexual attractiveness of many older women is men’s extreme thirst and their relative unattractiveness.

    Liked by 5 people

  113. Spawny Get says:

    I think that over forty, something can go really wrong with personality with some women. Are some women just bitter for the rest of their life because project baby didn’t work out as planned / as well as her competition? Also career maybe not fleshing out as planned in her strong-independant-young-wimminz-mind?

    It’s horrible personality that makes me stay away from older women more often than anything else. Being physically not turned on doesn’t make men head for the exit. Being a relentless toxic bitch does.

    Perhaps…perhaps…with proximity and a sweet personality, such a woman does get to be around men who might ‘weaken’ and forgive what has been lost in straight hawtness? Being considered as a pleasant life companion with healthy sex drive…that’s viable as long as sufficient looks remain.

    Liked by 4 people

  114. Yoda says:

    And I wouldn’t doubt, the do gooder has already reported how they just did so on Facebook, and the real thing they crave – admiration from watching how many “likes” they get.

    “Live by Facebook, Die by Facebook”.
    A better use of time they might have?

    Liked by 1 person

  115. Yoda says:

    It’s horrible personality that makes me stay away from older women more often than anything else.

    Unpleasantness on purpose it is?
    Being pleasant not so hard it would be.

    Like

  116. thedeti says:

    “I think that over forty, something can go really wrong with personality with some women. Are some women just bitter for the rest of their life because project baby didn’t work out as planned / as well as her competition? Also career maybe not fleshing out as planned in her strong-independant-young-wimminz-mind?”
    __________

    I’m flying by the seat of my pants here. But, I’ll take a guess as to what happens with these women. These women are trying to construct and live lives they weren’t intended to have. They are trying to act, live, work, have “careers”, party, and fuck like men. They aren’t built for the rough and tumble, the high highs, the low lows, the disappointments, the stresses, and the long hours.

    Women aren’t built to get educations and then work nonstop for 50 years like men. Women aren’t built to experience 20 different cocks before age 30. Women aren’t built to bond to a sexually attractive man and then have those bonds broken; and they aren’t built to do that 15 times in 10 years. Women aren’t built to undergo that repeated rejection that happens in dating and in the work world, as happens to men. Women aren’t built to schmooze, socialize and network. They aren’t built to “lean in”. So as a result, a lot of women are having slow-motion nervous breakdowns due to deep disappointments in many things. It’s why so many are depressed, become alcoholics and addicts, get on antidepressant medication, and are generally screwed up.

    Liked by 6 people

  117. Yoda says:

    Lots of good Deti content on this thread there is.

    Like

  118. Yoda says:

    These women are trying to construct and live lives they weren’t intended to have.

    What lives intended to have they are?

    Like

  119. “I haaaad to.. Tingles…” Sorry, weak sauce. Nobody “has” to have an affair. she could have gotten a divorce.

    “i haaad to…” Maybe she can explain it to her kids that way???

    Liked by 1 person

  120. thedeti says:

    Yoda:

    This is politically incorrect. It’s my considered opinion, informed both here and in the wisdom of the ages, that women were and are intended to have lives in which their purposes are submitted to the life of a man they find attractive, and his mission. It is in such a submitted life in which most women find their truest happiness. Unfortunately, most women (and most men) don’t believe this. It is pure thoughtcrime to think or believe it, and almost an imprisonable offense to say it. It’s been said that man’s happiness is “I will”; and woman’s happiness is “he wills”.

    I wonder how much happier women might be if they simply made the effort to like their husbands more and make the best of it. I wonder if women might be happier if they reposed themselves in trusting their God and in the love of their husbands, and simply said “God wills” and “he wills”, and left their well being in the loving hands and hearts of their husbands.

    I often wonder how much happier men and women both might be if men, as husbands, plotted a course for their lives and their families’ lives, and resolved to walk it out, come success or failure, wealth or poverty. I think men and women both might be happier if men said “it is my will that our lives will be thus and so, I have decided it, and it shall be thus. If I turn out to be wrong and we fail, then we will plot another course, and we will find a way. If I am correct and we succeed, so much the better.”

    Liked by 5 people

  121. Spawny Get says:

    “I wonder how much happier women might be if they simply made the effort to like their husbands more and make the best of it.”

    You know, this doesn’t sound like the craziest of ideas

    Liked by 3 people

  122. Yoda says:

    informed both here and in the wisdom of the ages

    Know how to appeal to me you do.

    Like

  123. Yoda says:

    Simplify Deti I will,
    “Make him sammiches she should”

    Liked by 1 person

  124. Yoda says:

    It is pure thoughtcrime to think or believe it, and almost an imprisonable offense to say it

    Warn you of approaching authorities I will.
    If come they do,
    then to Degoba you should go.
    Safe you will be

    Like

  125. theasdgamer says:

    Bloom, what I am seeing is that divorced women are marrying betas after about 7-12 years post-divorce knowing at some level that those betas are unattractive. The divorced women typically live with the beta for a few years, then pressure the betas for commitment by slowing sex.

    Women may be able to partially deceive themselves about the unattractive nature of the betas, but they have to know at some level what they are getting into. It’s all about the bux.

    Then, these women go out among more attractive men and, lo and behold, tingles!

    The depression comes from the lack of cards that women have to get commitment from attractive men. No hope.

    Liked by 1 person

  126. Cill says:

    “What’s the point in playing amog games when I am around?”
    Can’t see any sense in playing amog games on a blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  127. Cill says:

    Unless for humor. In which case it’s not games. It’s just humor.

    Liked by 1 person

  128. SFC Ton says:

    LOL if I recall correctly jedi’s didn’t do so well vs us stormtrooper type and that’s why they are scarce on the ground….

    I disagree it takes a deep level of misery for a wife to cheat. Mostly I think it takes about .2 secs of Ophra like justifying & a semi decent chance of not being found out

    I have never told a woman I would respect her in the morning. Hells bells I don’t respect in the evening either.

    Liked by 1 person

  129. theasdgamer says:

    There is a 2nd route that women in a 2nd marriage take to avoid depression over their lack of cards–they cheat. If they were cheating in their 1st marriage, then it’s not a big leap and misery likely isn’t involved. A lot of times they will blame their ex-husband’s drinking for their infidelity. And the reality is often that the ex-husband’s balls were broken by the wife’s cheating, so he started drinking.

    A woman who blames her ex-husband’s drinking for her divorce should be suspected of breaking his balls. Some women are especially adept at this. They are to be avoided for anything except P&D.

    Like

  130. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    I have to agree with Deti, there is a lot of deception going on and the wose of it is women decieving themselves.

    Like

  131. theasdgamer says:

    the wose of it is women decieving themselves.

    It’s especially bad when women are hurt. Because women are just so much more valuable than men.

    Like

  132. Yoda says:

    I recall correctly jedi’s didn’t do so well vs us stormtrooper type

    True only because Jedis outnumbered by orders of magnitude they were.

    Liked by 1 person

  133. BuenaVista says:

    Wow: this week is epigraph city: Ton must be delirious from new father sleep deprivation, he’s waxing like an eternal prophet:

    “I mean everybody speaks English with a M4 pointed at their face.”

    “What’s the point in playing amog games when I am around? Everyone else is playing for second place……”

    ***

    I commuted to Japan for a few years. That meant for half of the month my body clock was exactly 100% backwards.

    My apartment was near the US embassy. I would do my morning running at dawn, in the silent streets, around the embassy. In Japan businessmen are required to drink themselves blotto each and every night. So I’d be out on the damp streets feeling like roadkill, nearly insane from sleep deprivation (I don’t sleep when the clocks are not advanced 13 hours; turn the clocks upside down, I would sleep 2-3 hours a day). Then I’d see the Marines attempting to stand guard at 6 a.m. around the embassy and I’d know: I have no idea what a real hangover is like. U.S. Marines on embassy duty in Tokyo? They know what a hangover is. We’d give each other a shaky wave; sometimes one or two of them would join me for a few steps before loping away to the front.

    Like

  134. BuenaVista says:

    Bloom, judge all you want. I judge myself 24/7.

    It’s only girls and pajama boys who say, “Don’t judge me!” I judge myself in the negative on this event, but: one, I gave myself a pass because I was so desperately happy to be alive; two, she said it was okay and did the recruiting; three, I figure I’m already swimming in the Lake of Fire, i.e., Hell, so WTF.

    Liked by 3 people

  135. BuenaVista says:

    To Deti’s analysis, an irony of the situation is that when a woman one loves says, “I just want to be with you, no strings or expectations attached” she’s really saying what we have been trained to hear, much to our regret.

    She’s saying, “I love you just for who you are. I want you to just be yourself.” Woo-hoo. Believe that at your peril. But many of us want it to be true: Maybe I don’t have to live with the bitter reality of red pill. Of course, in 2.5 months, other questions arose, and life is not a RomCom: “Who will pay my BMW lease?”

    I’m pretty hardcore RP at this point. But a beautiful girl saying, “Just be yourself” is a siren call, the sirens of the Greeks, luring stalwart sailors into the rocks. After, I sat in a chair for three months. I’m probably already dead, so sitting in a chair waiting to die is a waste of time.

    There’s simply no avoiding it. Our value is our utility.

    I saw her today, but again refused the deed. (When her pussy husband confronts me I will be honest in my denial.)

    She said, approximately 15 times, “I’m afraid of you, you’re so aggressive.” This while pawing at my midsection.

    And I said, “That’s good. It means you still like me.”

    The red pill is as automatic, ineluctable, as obvious — as gravity.

    Liked by 2 people

  136. BuenaVista says:

    Deti, I think you are right about the deeply broken nature of the 35-45 year old spinster career girl. I finally asked one of my girlfriends, who wishes also to get married but undermines and sabotages the idea in 1 of 3 interactions, if she is autistic. I gave her three things to do if she wanted me to trust her. Couldn’t do them for more than three days at a time.

    In her defense, she’s damaged for other reasons, like getting four men killed because she was placed in a job she had no business performing. (How convenient for the higher-ups.) But I think it’s 50/50 she lives to be 50. We’re not talking depression or PTSD, we’re talking the total collapse of feminist/progressive assumptions about a meaningful life, plus the knowledge of getting her friends and bodyguards waxed. I can’t save her, as kind as she is (occasionally) to me.

    I note, however, that we red pill devotees are the kafirs, the infidels. Resistance is futile, if by resistance we mean educating and saving a few who swim in the popular currents.

    Liked by 3 people

  137. @ bv don’t judge yourself, grow. You are alive still for a reason. The lake of fire is a choice. Nobody is doomed, although the serpant whispers it is so, why bother, live for today. Pretty little lies. There is more to all this than this. Your accident showed you so, as did my own brush with near death 10 years ago. Talk about a mind fuck, almost dying. But it has been a gift to me… I see now that this trip won’t last forever, make it meaningful, something that inspires. You are meant for so much more than doing some other man’s family wrong. No ody “deserves” that, inept sex or not. Don’t let her hamster run you against what you know is true. She will do to you, or any, what she’s doing to him. I guarantee it. Not that peoe can’t change, but her pointing the finger at him for her a too a tells me she has a long way to go, and it likely won’t be pretty getting there. I’d tell her just that. Look within sister, there is your answer.

    Like

  138. @ bv we all fall short, or there would be no need for Grace. But you are a light, be a light. Don’t be the darkness. Far too much of that in this world. Peace.

    Like

  139. thedeti says:

    Bloom:

    BV’s writing here today evinces remorse and repentance. By his fruits we know him.

    Liked by 1 person

  140. BuenaVista says:

    Bloom, you’re quite mistaken. We are two people in Hell already. Some are.

    I didn’t harm her ‘family’, I harmed her husband’s mistaken belief that he had purchased a pretty face. I harmed her comfortable belief that security = intimacy. I breached and scuttled my personal integrity, seeking comfort.

    People do reach out for each other, even in Hell.

    Let’s talk about baseball instead. Bryce Harper might be as good as Mickey Mantle.

    I only offered the anecdote to remind a few guys that no one will ever love them “for being himself.” (Bitter red pill cliche #32.) It’s a siren call on the dark watch, the 3 a.m. watch, that steers one’s boat onto the rocks.

    So we’re back at sea now, rowing hard for Valhalla. Peace out.

    Liked by 1 person

  141. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Bloom,
    Part of what you said spoke to me too. All bachelors are in the lake of fire.

    Like

  142. I am not trying to hammer on BV here, truly, I know he has been hurt, and is remorseful. I think he was being worked the whole time.

    But let’s take a step back, say it wasn’t BV, just a case scenario. Maybe some gal i know who told me this tale of her affair, and I was telling the tale. You all would not usually be nearly so easy on HER. Deti some of what you wrote is pure Oprah. Women have affairs out of desperation? It’s their husband’s fault, not hers? She couldn’t help it? All this is female hamster rationalizing. I can’t believe anyone is blaming her husband for any of this? Ok maybe he didn’t f her good, but somehow I am guessing this wasn’t a surprise (to her) on the wedding night. Or maybe she did make him wait, I don’t know, but somehow I doubt that was a bridge never crossed. She knew going in. Maybe she told herself it didn’t matter, but lying to onself is no excuse, and a victim that does not make.

    What this does show me is how easily men’s emotional strings are worked. Even men who know better, logically. How men really do need to guard their heart when a women in a relationship w another man shows interest. No matter how pretty the package or sad the story. She’s taken. End of.

    As a woman I can see exactly where this gal was going with all this. And it pisses me off she dragged BV into her web. My anger is at her, a woman to a woman. and as such I aint buying it. It was a branch swing from the get go, she just didn’t tell BV. she wanted to get him “hooked” first. (And maybe pregnant first too, if possible.) she was hunting to move up.

    Fact is she choose to marry her husband, nobody sold her to him by force. I don’t remember the wedding vows being, “until I change my mind or want someone else.” She is a mother. And a wife. That means something. Or it should.

    Look I am far from perfect. But I sleep alone tonight by choice, not because I have to. It’s called self control and while it’s fallen out of fashion among women, it sure helps reduce complexity. I prefer my struggles to be of the not self induced sort, life is hard enough.

    I know I am ranting, and I am sorry BV if its out of line. You deserve more my friend, much more. You have been through quite enough. Guard your heart, I implore you. I hope she doesn’t turn woman scorned on you too. Shes not done yet. Protect yourself. No good will come of it if you don’t. Consider it advice from a sister. Peace.

    Liked by 1 person

  143. poseidon740 says:

    @ Fuzzie:

    I’m much better off not being married any longer. Marriage to my ex was emotional abuse, pure and simple. Now I have my son half time; a relationship that cannot be tainted like marriage. I don’t even feel lonesome at all. I do what I want when I want. Nobody hurts me.

    Try to find solace in being a bachelor if you can. Put yourself into a career, your musculature, other hobbies to the point of excellence. I know it is easier for me to talk as I was married and now I know first hand the grass is greener by not being married.

    Liked by 2 people

  144. And changing topic, I found this pretty interesting:

    http://markmanson.net/four-stages-of-life

    Like

  145. SFC Ton says:

    VALHALLA!!!!!!

    Liked by 4 people

  146. theasdgamer says:

    She is a mother. And a wife. That means something. Or it should.

    Not under marriage 2.0. A wife is just a girlfriend with a fancy title. And a little more expensive to break up with.

    Liked by 2 people

  147. theasdgamer says:

    As a woman I can see exactly where this gal was going with all this. And it pisses me off she dragged BV into her web. My anger is at her, a woman to a woman. and as such I aint buying it. It was a branch swing from the get go, she just didn’t tell BV. she wanted to get him “hooked” first. (And maybe pregnant first too, if possible.) she was hunting to move up.

    All’s fair in love and war. Cuz love is war using unorthodox tactics.

    Liked by 1 person

  148. Spawny Get says:

    ‘little’…yeah…if you’re lucky (I was)

    Like

  149. theasdgamer says:

    Look I am far from perfect. But I sleep alone tonight by choice, not because I have to. It’s called self control and while it’s fallen out of fashion among women, it sure helps reduce complexity. I prefer my struggles to be of the not self induced sort, life is hard enough.

    As Luther wrote, we get to choose the sins we commit. It’s about alternatives. Some sins are worse than others. Infidelity might be comparatively mild.

    Self-control is good because it is useful, not because it is ethically superior. You don’t get a gold star for having self-control.

    Liked by 1 person

  150. theasdgamer says:

    I know I am ranting, and I am sorry BV if its out of line.

    Meh, don’t be so hard on yourself. Your rant was useful.

    Like

  151. @ gamer I don’t want a gold star, it’s just self protection. When Hercules approached me, married, my answer despite the fact that he’s incredibly attractive and nobody would have known was, “isn’t my life complicated enough?” He could not argue otherwise and dropped it.

    After his divorce, maybe a year later, while now living with his girlfriend, again he corners me, all hot and bothered like,tells me hes not married anymore, how about now? I remind him of his girlfriend. He says, “yeah, I got involved with her too quickly, I should have taken some time off. My reply, “how’s any of that my problem, oh yeah, thank God, it’s not!”

    He was a text and five minutes away last night, always is. Nobody would know. I don’t regret not texting. I happily wake up alone.

    This is selfish self protection on my part, not virtue. My life is complicated enough, no need to add all that to my plate, however fun in the moment it could possibly be. It’s just not, IMHO, worth the tingles.

    Then again, preselection has never made sense to me. If I can steal him from another, I don’t want him. I want one I couldn’t steal from another, and who another could not steal from me.

    Liked by 1 person

  152. theasdgamer says:

    I want one I couldn’t steal from another, and who another could not steal from me.

    How can there be stealing without commitment? And how can there be commitment under Marriage 2.0?

    Like

  153. theasdgamer says:

    I love your idealism, Bloom, but it’s not practical under Marriage 2.0.

    Your chastity strategy is quite practical, otoh.

    Liked by 1 person

  154. theasdgamer says:

    Bloom, you might find a unicorn who is single, hawt, and virtuous, but you’ll need a serious strategy to find him. And devote time and resources to find him. Maybe hunt for new widowers?

    I could see leveraging self-control into attracting a unicorn. That would make a woman more attractive to me for a hypothetical LTR.

    And I get your situation with Hercules. We all have our little temptations, heh. There was this threesome I had last night…

    Like

  155. theasdgamer says:

    …on the dance floor. Gotcha!

    Liked by 1 person

  156. Is marriage 2.0 the only option now available? Sad.

    Maybe I am too idealistic. Maybe bc I live in a safe society I can be. If civilization fell apart, her les may find himself getting a chance. Otherwise my life is complicated enough.

    He’s actually not a bad guy otherwise, loves rocks, really should have studied geology. He’s obsessed with Sparta. Reads quite a bit. Carries a good conversation surprisingly well. But true? I just don’t see it in him. Maybe w age?

    But then again, his father is in his 70s, a charming and dashing bugger himself. Just had a new baby he did, with a gal who is 24. And no, he’s not with her. He lives in the logging camp. Always has. But somehow sired 7 (known) offspring (all incredibly attractive) just the same. Maybe he lives in Valhalla?

    What do I know? only this…Hercules? No. Not worth it. Pure self preservation.

    Liked by 1 person

  157. @ Poseidon very true, to be miserably married is worse than being alone. Fuzzie I hope you never experience the miserably married part, trust us on this. Not all are miserably married but far too many are. I don’t know logically why I hope to remarry, knowing what I know. Old fashioned, I guess, trying to live in a world that no longer exists…hoping it still does (an Achilles heel I need to beware, it almost recently got me in hot water. Luckily it did not.”

    The more I learn the less I know.

    Like

  158. 🐓 Rooster report >>>TRIGGER WARNING<<<<

    When my ex husband came to pick up our daughter, the rooster was out. It charged him. After four times, it did not get a fifth chance. The rooster now lives at Valhalla. The Bloomettes wildly approve, he has elevated in status ten fold. I feel bad for the rooster, but think my e was likely right. The bird was dangerous. It had to go. Caveman game.

    Like

  159. @ gamer re male unicorns… Interesting. A neighbor of mine is such. He lost his wife of 30+ years last June. She was wonderful and he loved her dearly. Together they raised their kids, then fostered over 200 more, adopting 20 some of them. He came in recently w his lady friend, who is now volunteering in my biz. She is a great gal, turns out she’s been single for 30some years since her husband left her two months after she paid his way through school, when she was pregnant w their first child, who she raised solo. She was the foster care coordinator for my neighbors for 20 some years. Shes taken quite the shine to me. She said to me the first time they came in she was thinking how perfect I would be for him, I said I was thinking how glad I was he’d found someone! Life is strange. But yes Gamer, there are unicorns out there. I think this one will be my adopted uncle. He’s handy w tractors and fixing stuff. And I like his girlfriend. I am happy for them and would never interfere. Makes me happier to see them happy! (He is 62, she is 72, but both are far younger looking and acting than their age.) just knowing there are unicorns gives me hope… If its meant to be, I’ll find one, already single…who likes nutty idealists who can’t start tractors or keep track of her tools.

    Like

  160. BuenaVista says:

    Bloom is associating my subject female with the woman in her Frivorced post — an error in multiple dimensions, but understandable given the superficial details I’ve provided. And she assigns a rational, devious strategy to someone who doesn’t think abstractly. Very few women do, RP cliche #432. I’ll not defend her further, for I’d just be defending her from herself and her nature. I accept her and her nature, whether or not I find it ideal. Women simply do not love idealistically, as we men do; I erred in letting her convince me, for a brief time, that there was no opportunism folded into the mix.

    Rollo emphasizes how men err badly when they presume that men and women think, ponder, react, and plan in the same manner as men. So this episode illustrates well my latent, recidivist blue pill equalism. When it was over I felt pole-axed because it confirmed the bitter taste of a red pill existence: because it was all so predictable from the perspective of the red pill catechism — it probably ended for good any lingering romanticism (or romanticism of the popular form) that I brought to this life. I also felt like an asshole for getting my hopes up, in the manner of an adolescent. It was fun to get drunk for a couple of months, though.

    It has been a good experience for both of us in that I see her and women more clearly yet; she admits, I think for the first time, that she will only be happy in a complementarian (not equalitarian) relationship. It was also an excellent experience for me in that I have worked extremely hard to develop a good filter that allows me to better select women in whom to invest my capacity for infatuation. I trust my filter now. Aside from the minor detail that … she’s married? — yeah, I was a dumb fuck, I wanted something for nothing … I do believe in the four or five attributes that comprise my filter.

    Bloom, you needn’t apologize so much when you’re annoyed. If there’s someone more self-critical than I, he’s probably in a straitjacket, heavily medicated. I don’t care if you go ballistic on me, I shrug and look for insights. You made your case, I just think you’re mistaken on a couple of points.

    I do think you might reflect on this, though: I think we agree that second marriages are not romantic fables, such as we had in our 20’s when we believed in the happily ever after. They are arrangements, they are more practical things, they offer (or should) different rewards.

    Accordingly, I think both women and men can have, and should have, plain pragmatic expectations of each other. Perhaps the true sadness here is she accepts as true my recent comments to her, alluding to the absurdity of a woman marrying a man she doesn’t want to fuck. When one’s childhood sweetheart vacates the premises, also vacated are the pretty lies and saccharine hopes that we absorbed like sunlight and oxygen. It’s all back then, back there, once upon a time. We only get in trouble when we attempt to resurrect such soft-focus delusions.

    Liked by 1 person

  161. Yoda says:

    Much content to this discussion there is.
    Much to be learned there can be.

    Liked by 1 person

  162. BuenaVista says:

    Very fresh chicken for supper, good stuff.

    There’s an excellent Playboy interview with Camille Paglia on the difference between men and the polite society eunuchs (and their feminist sisters); between men who fix tractors and lift hay bales, and the men who persist in the weird notion that gender is a social construct.

    Amusingly:

    PLAYBOY: Let us consider Anita Hill. Did Jane Mayer and Jill Abramson’s revelations about the Clarence Thomas confirmation hearings in their book Strange justice influence your feelings about that case?

    PAGLIA: That pathetic book? The idea that they found great new evidence of Thomas’ guilt is nonsense. Here is the major revelation: There were centerfolds in his kitchen. What a crime against humanity! I laughed out loud. He had five years of PLAYBOY. And here’s the kicker: They were arranged chronologically. OK? My response is this: Any man with five years Of PLAYBOY in his kitchen should be placed on the Supreme Court immediately! The fact is that Clarence Thomas doesn’t have the judicial excellence to be a Supreme Court justice. But that’s not the issue. I maintain that Thomas flirted with Anita Hill, who batted her eyes at him and was a little embarrassed and didn’t know what to do. Come on, he was looking for a wife. But how uncomfortable was she? She followed him from job to job. Feminists get around that by saying, “Well, she was ambitious.” I say, “Apparently her ambition was greater than any sexual harassment that occurred.” She chose her ambition. Anita Hill is just a yuppie. I’m the only leading feminist who went against her, and history will bear me out.”

    More appropriately to this discussion:

    “But then something would go wrong with my car and I’d have to go to the men. Men would stop, men would lift up the hood, more men would come with a truck and take the car to a place where there were other men who would call other men who would arrive with parts. I saw how feminism was completely removed from this reality.

    “I also learned something from the men at the garage. At Bennington, I would go to a faculty meeting and be aware that everyone hated me. The men were appalled by a strong, loud woman. But I went to this auto shop and the men there thought I was cute. “Oh, there’s that Professor Paglia from the college.” The real men, men who work on cars, find me cute. They are not frightened by me, no matter how loud I am. But the men at the college were terrified because they are eunuchs, and I threatened every goddamned one of them.”

    [For the Brits and Kiwi, Bennington College epitomizes the bizarre open-air leftist sanatorium approach to American higher ed: for $70K (post-tax, that means you need to gross maybe $130K per year just to pay the annual bill) you get to send your child to a collectivist, feminist indoctrination center, and all your UMC and UC friends say “How wonderful!”]

    I think my paramour understands how her husband is a eunuch now, and I have no idea what she’s going to do about that. Probably just bury herself in work and hope he leaves.

    Here is the full interview. Camille Paglia is a lighthouse who enrages the sirens who would otherwise direct us onto the rocks.

    http://privat.ub.uib.no/BUBSY/playboy.htm

    Liked by 1 person

  163. theasdgamer says:

    I saw how feminism was completely removed from this reality.

    Two sand crawlers were having a conversation. One of them pointed to a tide pool and exclaimed, “This is the Atlantic Ocean!”

    Like

  164. theasdgamer says:

    @ BV

    If we men could limit the scope of our interactions with women to sex, things would be so much simpler and more pleasurable. But we are creatures with emotions, too, and those emotions can be such damned nuisances. And then there’s ethics….

    Like

  165. BuenaVista says:

    Can’t agree, Gamer. I have always enjoyed the sense of purpose, and emotional and intellectual gratifications, that accrue in relationships, in addition to their sexual aspect. Frankly, since I went rogue-red-pill, I’ve begun to take the sexual side of things for granted. The other things I prize more highly, for they are rarer.

    Liked by 2 people

  166. BV I did not mean to say your friend is a bad person. But agreed, I am not sure what she is going to do about all this now… BMW payments don’t make themselves. On the other hand, less expensive cars get the job done too. Self support is always an option, not that it doesn’t have it’s drawbacks…

    The rooster was put in a bag and taken away, I am not sure if he became dinner or not. My ex’s stepson (cute kid, age 9, follows my ex about like a puppy) was quite excited about the whole thing. Maybe he got a lesson in plucking, feathering, and butchering as well. I am torn about it all…kindof taking a la la la approach to it all. What’s done is done. My kids approve. Two votes against my one. Probably for the best.

    I have a strange life I am starting to realize, but somehow it works. Good stories, anyway…

    La la la, cookies anyone? Chicken?

    Like

  167. @ bv quite true about the men and tractors and cars and such. She’s a wise woman to see it. Nothing brings a gal to the reality of her dependance on the kindness and abilities of men like a dead car battery! And naturally, if she’s at all like me, she knows what jumper cables look like, but not how to use them, nor where the darn things are, except they are not in the trunk where they should be.

    Women need men. I will go out on a limb and wager men need women in important, but different, ways too. Otherwise we’d have all given up long ago…

    Nature’s cruel joke. Sigh…

    Liked by 3 people

  168. Farm Boy says:

    Women need men. I will go out on a limb and wager men need women in important, but different, ways too. Otherwise we’d have all given up long ago…

    Nature’s cruel joke. Sigh…

    I would think that the cruel joke is feminism

    Liked by 2 people

  169. Spawny Get says:

    “And then there’s ethics….”

    a) trigger warning required
    b) are you sure? Not sure that I’m seeing much in the way of ethical behaviour from the ironically termed ‘ethical progressives’.

    Liked by 1 person

  170. theasdgamer says:

    BV, the value of emotions is context-dependent. If the relationship is a win for you, emotions can be a good thing. If it leads to bad outcomes, like being in love with a BPD woman or a married woman when you have ethical constraints against bedding a married woman, then emotions are to be avoided like the plague.

    Like

  171. BuenaVista says:

    As Camille Paglia sagely notes, Gamer, art is only produced by the ‘mutilated.’ So, disagree again. There’s always a price to be paid for knowledge, as well as joy. The price of sex has dropped to a few texts.

    Liked by 1 person

  172. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Bloom,
    I am sorry to hear about the rooster.The last word was that he was on his way to full rehabilitation. Get in touch with the people who sell you feed. They must know someone out there who has a spare rooster.

    Reading all this reminds me that men love idealistically and we’re all in when we do. We can’t guard our hearts.

    That someone as socially competent as BV could get into this worries me. If anything, I am more vulnerable.

    Liked by 1 person

  173. theasdgamer says:

    Sorry, BV, I’m not into self-mutilation (think of Karl Ruprecht Kroenen in “Hellboy). There’s always a risk when emotion is involved, even if the relationship is a win. Beauty can be produced without mutilation. I think of the love between Tom Bombadil and Goldberry.

    The best Art examines the human condition. The human condition isn’t necessarily beautiful.

    Sexual attraction without emotional attachments can be fun; flirting can be indulged. When emotional attachments are involved and the relationship is not a win, then the emotions can be a drag.

    Different strokes for different folks.

    Liked by 1 person

  174. theasdgamer says:

    @ Fuzzie

    That someone as socially competent as BV could get into this worries me.

    “Socially competent” doesn’t equal “relationally competent”. I’m sure BV way outshines me socially. I’ve been married to one wife for 3+ decades–a lot of that in a Blue Pill delusion. Mrs. Gamer is in love with me. I think that I have a fair degree of relational competence.

    Or you could consider Liz’s love, who is both socially and relationally competent.

    Nota bene:

    I’m not saying that I’m socially incompetent, but I lack BV’s charm and conversational skills. I have my own not-insignificant nonverbal skills that carry me along. I managed to pull off a dance threesome last night with two women I met last night when one of the women didn’t know the dance and we all had a great time.

    Like

  175. Farm Boy says:

    There is a new post

    Like

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