Women of times past were seemingly taught how to be the “social glue” in groups (families included and especially so). They would work to make sure that everybody was felt included in what what happening and they belonged. I benefited much from this as a child, being an introvert and all. In fact, to me, this seemed to be one of the best features of women.
But at University, I noticed that my age peer women had no interest in “group anything”. That is, unless it lead to tingles (though I did not think in terms of tingles at the time). These women might look appealing physically to me; but I was turned off by the fact that they seemingly would make poor wives and mothers. Probably if these women had shown more grace I would have tried harder while in my 20’s. I wonder if other men were/are like me on this.
This attribute (grace) is actually quite useful to women. They should cultivate it. Uniting groups, making them feel at ease with each other, etc, can benefit women by essentially bringing themselves under the protective umbrella (be it physical, financial, social, etc) of the group that they helped create. And in the near future, many women may need this.
I have seen this in my babysitter’s clan, a fairly closed world not influenced by feminism or modern ways. Here’s what it looks like: http://notesfromaredpillgirl.com/2014/11/12/inside-a-world-without-feminism/
LikeLike
Bloom,
That reminds me. Were you able to find someone for your brother from your babysitter’s clan?
Farm Boy,
I think the concept of grace started fading with my mother’s generation. For it to work, the “graceful” one needs to be able to empathise with others.
LikeLiked by 1 person
@ fuzzie no, my brother was not willing to forgo alcohol and modern living, making him unrecommendable by the babysitter, unfortunately.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Bloom,
While I don’t drink anymore, I’d give it up ihn a Now York minute for the right girll.
It is a shame. I got the sense that he admired your babysitter and wanted one like her for his very own.
LikeLike
@ Farmboy:
During my brief time here at this blog, to me it seems that Tarn does kinda just what you described in your post. She seems to empathetically think of others and the group as a whole. And she isn’t even a chick??
LikeLiked by 1 person
Bloom,
On the other thread, there was some discussion in regard to Matthew C.. He does seem to be developing a lecturing tone to you. If it gets worse, you mat have to drop the ban-hammer.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It wasn’t me!!!!
https://dissention.wordpress.com/2015/04/15/russian-girls-twerking-to-winnie-pooh-and-the-bees/
LikeLike
Gidday Farm Boy, Fuzzie, how are you going boys?
Anyone else here I know?
LikeLike
Is this a “newer thread”? Yello Fuzzie I’m already here mate. How you going?
Still pulling the old plow Farm Boy?
LikeLike
Cillo? Molly? Ezzy? Anyone?
LikeLike
None of you Kiwis awake? It looks like my timing is off. Better luck next time, folks! Until then, farewell. Live it up!
LikeLiked by 3 people
Choicy,
You caught us at a time when we all nap. I think the liveliest time for this blog is 9am to 5pm Eastern Time US, my local. Since the switch to dalight to standard and from standard to daylight here, I have lost track of what local time is down under.
My guess is that you are at hime in Australia and just got internet.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh dear fuzzie re the twerking thing, I hope I don’t see my daughters dancing like that someday!
LikeLike
@ fuzzie re my babysitter’s culture, I would agree there is a lot to it that works. There is an expectation of men in it that I am less able to describe except to say its also very traditional. My brother would not fit in with the men of her culture, nor did he display to her traits that he would be good marriage material, in the way her culture would define that, unfortunately. I am not sure how exactly to explain it…there’s an expectation of men and masculinity that is as foreign in our culture today as women of her nature are.
LikeLike
Too bad I missed Choicy. Damn.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hey Choicy! How you going? I hear you had roof damage in the storm.
LikeLike
@ fuzzie imagine a bunch of Amish men standing around w a guy who is a computer/IT guy, and how different their worlds would be and how little they might have in common, besides being male, and if they would consider him good marriage material, if that makes any sense?
LikeLike
He could’ve been at a hotel somewhere. Can you tell what locality he was at, Spawny? He’s not answering email at the moment. (who knows what old Choicy might be up to).
LikeLike
Poseidon,
Tarn is most clearly seen online as a genuinely nice, logical guy. Tarn wants to help men. If you read Tarn’s blog you’ll see that attitude being carried into real life.
I think we have very similar views in most things. But what she writes here is read by those not paying attention through a filter of ‘bio-chick says’. When I write similar stuff it’s read as ‘wise old sage with BTMSGL says’.
With Tarn one just needs to put away the misconceptions about the source being a ebul wimminz and just read what is written. That’s how INTJs work, there can be misspeaking and honest confusion, but any subsequent clarifications seldom change the intent of the original text. I swear that I’ve never seen so much straw manning going on as when Tarn is taken to task. It’s weird to see and I’m sure, exhausting to be on the receiving end of.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Bloom, what are you doing awake at this unholy hour?
LikeLiked by 1 person
What’s unholy about 9am?
For the others. Kiwis are now only 11 hours ‘ahead’ of Patriarchal Time. Subtract one and flip day/night. We’re catching up… Aussies will be closer to proper time.
LikeLike
Cill, check yer email
LikeLike
Remember the lefty daft moo who tweeted about the pleb white van, England flag waving plebs? She lost her job when Millibland unleashed his terrifying temper and threw all his toys out of his pram. Of course you do. For the few who don’t, voila Emily Thornberry / Lady Nugee

Well, she did it again.
LikeLiked by 1 person
“Cill, check yer email”
Nothing there |:
LikeLike
What’s going on? If I didn’t know better, I’d suspect a conspiracy. With practical jokers like Molly around, I sniff trickery…
LikeLike
“Cill, check yer email”
Repeat: There is no email from you.
LikeLike
Well…the problem must be on your end because I don’t seem to have the same issue with anyone else.
Have you logged in and checked your account via browser? Checked yer spam box?
LikeLike
It was in Spam. I’ve answered it to say I think I know which part of the world he’s in right now.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Get your luvverly new post here
LikeLike
Emily grace she has not
LikeLiked by 1 person
Maybe, as with hippos, when seen underwater, she can move with delicate grace?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Twerking teens in Russia. Nice.
You know that scene in It’s a Wonderful Life where George Bailey gets a look at what his town would have ended up like without him and it’s basically just a red light district filled with violence, drunks, and winos? That’s like our world after social media.
You don’t find nice things like ‘grace’ and charm in environments like that. It isn’t cultivated, and even if it happens there’s too much crap around to notice. Another reason I hate big cities.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The military did this (at least active duty)…it’s kind of gone by the wayside now, but for most of Mike’s time in the service I took a very active role “welcoming” and organizing baby showers/welcoming parties/cookie drives/meals for ill family members, those with new babies/ children’s parties/ children’s playgroups and so forth.
I was the welcome person for the squadron several different times. When people arrived new, I’d bring a gift to the TLF (or home if they were already settled) and had a pamplet with the ‘best stuff in the area/recommended things/important numbers’ to give them.
That doesn’t happen much in Reserve units, I’ve noticed.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hard to believe I was the welcome person, eh? INTJ me.
Hope no one shot coffee out of their nose on that one, for once I’m actually serious. 😉
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hey Liz, can you explain the pig poster on the latest post to Cill?
LikeLike
or here…

LikeLiked by 2 people
I mean…the pig isn’t talking about itself…sobvious
LikeLike
“I mean…the pig isn’t talking about itself…sobvious”
You missed something yourself:
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2015/04/16/hush-now-the-politicians-decide-the-acceptable-debates/comment-page-1/#comment-19086
LikeLike
Lol Swithy! 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
And: https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2015/04/16/hush-now-the-politicians-decide-the-acceptable-debates/comment-page-1/#comment-19083
sobvious
LikeLiked by 1 person
20K comments today?
LikeLiked by 1 person
“Maybe, as with hippos, when seen underwater, she can move with delicate grace?”
The hippo is related to the Sperm Whale, I’d have you know. It’s true.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The hippo is not related to the pig.
LikeLike
I’m going to try to get some kip. See you tomorrow, or in the middle of the night, whenever.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Grace meaning being nice, especially to those who want her to be nice.
LikeLike
Hard to believe I was the welcome person, eh? INTJ me
Almost inconceivable this would be
LikeLiked by 1 person
The hippo is related to the Sperm Whale
Both mammals they are.
LikeLike
Rapists men are,
http://washingtonexaminer.com/california-continuing-its-quest-to-brand-all-men-as-rapists/article/2563092?custom_click=rss
LikeLike
Give it up for Shoe0nHead
LikeLike
Papal wisdom,
http://www.zenit.org/en/articles/pope-francis-removal-of-differences-between-man-and-woman-is-the-problem-not-the-solution
LikeLike
I very happy to see the changes in this blog. Tarn is MUCH MORE appreciated then
in the past. (You don’t know what you have until you lose it.) Spwany is much more
interactive with the posters.
But most of you still occupy a higher intellectual plane then I do. Most of the things
you discuss, I’m completely clueless about. I don’t know whether it’s a difference, in
intellect, culture, experience, or phraseology.
Spawny, (and others) are “decent” but I can’t get what you are talking about? INTJ?
I am an INFJ. Beauty sweeps me off my feet. I worship it! See the film “The Big Street”
(1937) starring Henry Fonda and Lucille Ball for how I relate to those I adore.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yay for Francis, for this.
I’m trying to think of a fun way to discuss The Fall From Grace as touched on by Francis.
LikeLike
I very happy to see the changes in this blog.
Which changes would this be?
LikeLike
re: russian girls
http://ru-facts.com/news/view/45571.html
“Mothers enjoyed it”
LikeLike
“Mothers enjoyed it”
http://gawker.com/horny-mom-threw-teen-daughter-a-naked-twister-sex-party-1697948520
LikeLike
In other news, an irradiated ark of sorts turns up four years later.
http://www.oregonlive.com/pacific-northwest-news/index.ssf/2015/04/large_bow_believed_to_be_tsuna.html
LikeLike
re: twister party
I would think it would be fun if there were equalist evidence of dads encouraging their girls away from grace towards tingling.
LikeLike
“We should definitely be shaming disgusting men for being disgusting”
http://www.nationalreview.com/article/416791/school-dress-codes-slammed-rape-culture-katherine-timpf
LikeLike
“I am an INFJ.”
Just one letter different, yet the experience of the world is utterly transformed.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Rape Culture
http://suzannevenker.com/the-truth-about-the-so-called-rape-culture/
LikeLike
re: “I benefited much from this as a child”
Women can be really good at mothering. I *think* it’s true that if women have an innate ability to be good at anything, then mothering, and only mothering, is it. This graceful uniting of which you speak appears to me to be identical with some motherly behaviors in groups – wipe some noses, bake some cookies, kiss some booboo.
Small wonder then, that there is demonization of betas wanting to be pleased by women. “You’re being a crybaby!” “I’m not going to make YOU sammiches; I’m not your momma!”
LikeLike
Fall from grace she did.
http://www.nationalenquirer.com/celebrity/exclusive-hillary-clinton-lesbian-lovers-named-secret-emails
LikeLike
Rise from grace this is,
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3040009/Women-Japan-tying-RIBBONS-breasts-boost-cleavage-s-inspired-curvy-cartoon-character.html
LikeLike
Although not all dads are betas, most are. Does any male really feel a huge difference between “I’m so glad she likes it” when feeding his woman a banana and “I’m so glad she likes it” when feeding his baby girl her (baby food) bananas?
So why, I ask knowingly, therefore menacingly, but in a cute kinda fun way, like a tiger striped kitten, are women so very very very very loathe to admit that the nurturing feelings for their babies are the exact same nurturing feelings they get whenever they happen to feel like nurturing their men? I know why, but I want you to hear it from the women first.
LikeLike
Emily Thornberry seems phenomenally soft and husky-shaped.
LikeLike
Omg the twister party thing, too much! Why some people don’t spontaneously burst into flame is beyond me! It would be handy.
LikeLike
Most women suffer from the apex fallacy, and the basic proof is that they can’t see that they do. But they can see it in other women.
http://thoughtcatalog.com/stephanie-casella/2015/04/the-real-reason-behind-slut-shaming-that-no-one-seems-to-recognize/
“most men go through phases of conquering women in high numbers”
LikeLike
I am trying to think of fun post topics. May I suggest a series of “things X say” and in the comments we can make up play dialog to illustrate. Like, things betas say, things alphas say, things feminists say, things entitled princesses say, things mtgtow say, things blue pill people say, etc? Just a suggestion. In a poke fun exaggerated hyperbole kind of way, not in a heavy downer or insultong way. I dunno. Maybe not. Just throwing it out there.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Or we puld do a so g dedication post, like this one from my in er princess to jf13’s inner alpha! (Trigger warning sappy Taylor Swift song)
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8xg3vE8Ie_E
LikeLike
Was it Johnny Carson who had a bit in which he would read examples of “Things A ___ Might Say”? Maybe Letterman? I don’t watch, but I have seen.
LikeLike
I just want a princess who gladly cleans my toilets. I mean, how hard can it be?
LikeLiked by 1 person
As suggested by Matthew:
“Things A Stuck-up Slut Might Say”
1. “Ok, so you and him, and him, ok. But not him, or him either.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
re: phases
You know you’re really living when the Ṅ that you’re not sure of is which of your many conquering phases you’re in. Things An Apex Alpha migh say:
1. “I think maybe this is about the twelfth or thirteenth time this year, so far, that I’ve just gone out and conquered high numbers of women. In other words, basically every weekend. But I’ve been slack a couple of weekends and only conquered a few women. So, I’m working on that.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
Things A Creep-shamed Beta Might Say:
(but first a digression into capitalization rulez. The MLA would have us capitalize -Shamed, but there ain’t no rule saying we have to use MLA rulez.)
1. “But, but, but, I was just asking, like you told me to.”
LikeLiked by 2 people
re: “They would work to make sure that everybody was felt included in what what happening and they belonged.” or else.
Maybe the pressure to conform to patriarchal expectations led to a better policing of the herd.
LikeLike
Things a creep shamed beta might say: (nothing…he’d like to but she might call him creepy, better not…)
😦
LikeLike
Things a jerky alpha who was married to your neighbor might say when dropping off his kids for a playdate (true story): hey look at this… I turn around and he has his pants down.
What I said: hell no, what is wrong with you? Put that away and get the f out!!!
What he said: but wait, here look at this picture on my phone (of his … ahem)
What I said: GTFO you freak! (Slammed the door in his face)
Sadly when I told his wife she said he’d done it to several of her other friends, and her sister!!!! What a jerk!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Things An Advertisement For A Russian Girls’ Modern Dance Recital might say:
1. “Come see them show you! “The Fall From Grace” presented for mothers’ enjoyments, featuring sixteen years aged Lyuba in the starring role of Eve portrayed in the style of DJane HouseKat, with real fig leaves!!” (Lyuba’s boyfriend was hand-selected by her mom for the nonspeaking role of the Snake)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Things a women’s studies professor might say (true story!): all sex is rape. All men are abusers.
Me: my boyfriend isn’t an a user.
Her: liar! All men are abusers. All of them. If he hasn’t abused you yet, he will!
(She was a freak)
LikeLike
re: pants on the ground
I can’t imagine, ok shouldn’t imagine, the circumstances under which which a man with his pants down would try to impress a chick with an earlier photo. “It’s not always like you see here now. Look at this picture on my phone. Sometimes, it looks like that.”
LikeLike
Things a horny mom might say: get, why don’t you in it’s your boyfriend and his cute guy friends over, we’ll play naked twister!
(Next morning, after doing a 19 year d then passing out after drinking and smoking pot and playing with sex toys in front of everyone) my daughter’s boyfriend is doing me, I mean raping me, and it’s all her fault! She didn’t satisfy him
Things her AA sponsor might say when she tells the story: ah yeah, ummm, can you wait right here while I make a quick phone call?
LikeLike
Yeah I didn’t get it either jf13! Like the photo is going to change my mind? Um, no.
LikeLike
He’s not very smart, I don’t think. All of his sibilings (from 5 different moms) are extremely attractive, but none of them are very smart, either. His three children are also all very attractive, but not very smart. Of course the two women who had kids with him are both very attractive but not very smart, so hard to say if it’s his gene pool or hers?
LikeLike
They divorced and moved away when his wife found out her best froend’s new baby was his. Apparently the “hey, look at this” line sometimes worked!?!?!
LikeLiked by 1 person
But enough stories, I need to mow the yard!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Things My Inner Alpha Might Have Said To A Women’s Studies Professor:
1. “Yes, I can understand that a woman might feel all sex is rape, if she is with a man who comes on too strong and she isn’t ready for it. So, when do you think you might be ready for it? I have a little time to kill right now, but I’ll be busy later this evening.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
Things A Real Bear Might Say, Regarding Available Porridge:
1. “Waiter, please bring me all of this Just Right porridge, please. Now. And all the Too Hot, and all the Too Cold, too. And I mean right now. Grrr.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
“Does any male really feel a huge difference between “I’m so glad she likes it” when feeding his woman a banana and “I’m so glad she likes it” when feeding his baby girl her (baby food) bananas?”
That would probably depend on the size and shape of the banana.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s right. I liked my own post.
Sometimes I make myself giggle….
LikeLiked by 1 person