Your Mother Should Know – But DOESN’T!


Let’s all get up and talk about sons
And how they don’t step up to marry some girl
Though she was born a long, long time ago
His mother should know
His mother should know

And yet it appears she -and so many like her- don’t have a clue.

Those who read Psychology Today might understand this growing phenomenon, not that women want to admit their role in the effort. As the magazine published in 2012, “some men choose opting out as the best option for them. This is sometimes known as the ‘men going their own way’ (MGTOW) movement. Essentially, these are the guys who have been frustrated and punished to the point that they see no further incentive to relate. Rather than spending their efforts on material success to attract a partner, they focus on making themselves happy. Although these guys are often socially-shamed as ‘not growing up’, in fact, they are arguably just reacting to the lack of outside motivation…and taking care of themselves.”

I’ve heard frequently from my wife about my older son not “launching” despite the fact that he can’t get hired anywhere. He can protest all day about how his applications get ignored by the kilo and it doesn’t sink in to his mother why attempting to date is a great waste of his time – assuming he found a female who didn’t turn him off with her attitudes and behaviors.

Let’s say for starters that he was to discover such a unicorn. Forbes Magazine published an article, written by Larissa Faw, which reveals the list of qualifications she and her Sex In The City posse use to measure a potential mate: “They have this list of qualities (smart, has a job, knows something about culture or the world, etc) that seem pretty reasonable, but so few men meet the requirements,” says Melanie Shreffler, a marketing consultant on Millennial culture.

Except for the job, my son meets those qualifications. He is thus unqualified to be taken captive by a female for her reproductive desires. As cited by Forbes, Liza Mundy tries to explain this feminine rejection in her book The Richer Sex: “I talk to so many women who are obsessed with finding men on their level. They want someone as ambitious, engaged, and high-achieving as they are.”

Dr Michael Dunn, of the University of Wales Institute in Cardiff, found in a study that women will reject a man shown in a photo driving a battered Ford Fiesta when they avidly accept the exact same man dressed the exact same way when when he’s shown in a Bentley Continental. Dr Dunn said his findings confirmed that women judge a man by his wealth and status.

My son owns a 1999 Saturn. About as impressive as Great-Grandma’s decrepit De Soto to the modern woman.

Jezebel ’s Katie J.M. Baker has to put her two cents’ worth into the mix: “But I don’t want that to come off as me encouraging women to ‘settle’ — because I’d personally rather be single than in a relationship with someone who isn’t worth it.

The problem, Ms. Baker, is that few men are seen as worth the effort. Yet you women don’t get to the reason why, in part due to the following misunderstanding:

“[Marriage] is a worthy goal,” say Mundy. “It’s strange that it’s stigmatized.”

No, it’s not strange. Women still don’t see how expensive they are to men despite maybe knowing these things about themselves. They see the forest, but ask where the trees are.

I’m A Lumberjack And I’m OK – You’re only so-so

Luckily, there are a couple of woodsmen available to point out the trees to these canaries:

“You don’t bring anything to the table in the marriage bargain anyway,” complains Forbes article commenter yeahso. “Firstly, you’re all total commitment-phobes unable to really care or bond with any man–regardless of how much money he makes or what class he comes from. And the funniest thing is, you actually think that every man who looks at you doesn’t already know this about you. What’s unseen and certainly unspoken about here is all the instances where the right men walked away. Faded out. Disappeared. Took one look at the goods and said, ‘nope–not risking all my assets and future assets on THAT’. [Emphasis mine]

“Maybe it’s only poetic justice that modern women have absolutely no idea how the men they interact with really see them when the reverse is not true. Not true at all. Men know they are despised and looked down on by women–especially educated [women].” [minor typo repair]

Commenter Angelo Parkinson picks up this thread: “Women who are highly educated are actually more materialistic and superficial preferring even more so to be with for men with wealth, status and income and don’t give a man a chance if he doesn’t meet their financial expectations (mostly make a lot more money). They want to fly around the world, live in a million dollar home… because after all they deserve it.”

One might suggest that women look in the mirror to see the source of their deprivation. Unfortunately, as David Buss, psychology researcher at The University of Texas at Austin, discovered (in association with Todd Shackelford, psychology professor at Florida Atlantic University), women idealize “partners who have all the characteristics they desire, but they will calibrate their standards based on their own desirability.” In other words, if THEY think they are themselves hot, their opinions regarding the men who approach them become even more stringent. And if their friends know something about some man, they “frame” their perceptions of this poor schlub to their friend so that he is more likely to be rejected, even though she’s just met him. This was determined in a study published in the journal Evolution and Human Behavior by Concordia marketing professor Gad Saad and Wilfrid Laurier University’s Tripat Gill.

Are we thus surprised that the 2010 National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior (NSSHB) reported in 2010 that 56.9 percent of single men ages 18 to 24 hadn’t had vaginal sex in the previous year? Can it be safe to assume that these numbers have NOT improved since then?

There is but one response to this situation, and it comes from Liza Mundy, who wrote The Richer Sex: [women] “maybe need to rethink that [attitude about male suitability] to seek a partner who is supportive, rather than competitive.”

It’s the only way my son will ever find a partner and get his mother off his back. Just don’t expect this to happen any time soon.

Apologies to Paul McCartney for mangling his lyrics.

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Posted in Blurkel, Gynocentrism, Hypergamy
47 comments on “Your Mother Should Know – But DOESN’T!
  1. Cill says:

    “My son owns a 1999 Saturn. About as impressive as Great-Grandma’s decrepit De Soto to the modern woman.”

    I wonder what they’d think of a man with an Edsel?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. blurkel says:

    Edsels are showing up in classic car competitions. I suspect that a Blue Ribbon would enhance an Edsel’s appearance sufficiently to appeal to a distaff status seeker!

    Like

  3. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    The Edsel was a great car, the timeing for its introduction was off. It came out at a time when people were looking for no frills and it was modestly luxurious.
    The 1999 Saturn is a good choice. It’s paid for and it can’t depreciate.

    Blurkel,
    I think your son may be single for a long time and his mother has to come to understand how the current SMP/MMP works. She can’t hide her head in the sand anymore.
    I think what has to happen is that the marketplace completely seizes and that it be seen to do so by everyone.

    Like

  4. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    I have been told that women can only see differences in ststus with new vehicles. Fixed up older cars aren’t on their radar. As a model for consumption, older cars would be a fial in that they can’t depreciate.

    Like

  5. Cill says:

    Fuzzy, “As a model for consumption”

    Perhaps in their need to consume men, women prefer men to depreciate like dated cars, to justify trading them in for a new model. That could explain why they prefer shallow men and ephemeral relationships to the ones of lasting intrinsic value.

    Like

  6. SFC Ton says:

    Mothers don’t give a damn about sons…hence their support for feminism and what not.

    I’d invade the small nation of choice for an Edsel

    Liked by 1 person

  7. jf13 says:

    The male motive force derives from males motivated to exertions to surmount females’ resistance. In the absence of such resistance, the males do nothing all day but sex. In the absence of motivations, like we’re discussing, the males do nothing all day to bother trying the get sex.

    Like

  8. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cill,
    For those of us who would want a long term relationship, that having one hundred percent control of her reproduction has given women a short term option that has all butr sunk us.
    Bear is not thinking nice thoughts.Grrrrrr!

    Like

  9. Spawny Get says:

    In just over an hour we shift from Glorious Patriarchal GMT to Equally Glorious Patriarchal BST. British Summer Time. Stop laughing at the back. There’s nowt wrong with the clocks.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    I am in the midst of listening to a long convo between Stardusk and Karen Straughan.
    It has come up twice. Karen doesn’t hold out much hope for MGTOW taking over because of the national debt. But, this hasn’t stopped men going herbivore in Japan and their debt is two and a half times GDP. The US is even up.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Yoda says:

    Jezebel ’s Katie J.M. Baker has to put her two cents’ worth into the mix: “But I don’t want that to come off as me encouraging women to ‘settle’ — because I’d personally rather be single than in a relationship with someone who isn’t worth it.”

    High maintenance, low return she would be.
    Many women like this I know.
    But they know not.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Yoda says:

    Apologies to Paul McCartney for mangling his lyrics.

    Perhaps lyrics owned by Heather Mills they are.
    Apologize to her you might.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Yoda,
    Even Enzo Ferrari wouldn’t consider one of his cars as a daily driver. For that, he had a Fiat 124.

    Like

  14. Yoda says:

    They want to fly around the world, live in a million dollar home… because after all they deserve it

    Why true this is?
    Ever consider why they do?

    Like

  15. Cill says:

    Cricket World Cup final between NZ and Australia at Melbourne, starts in 35 minutes. NZ defeated Australia in a World Cup pool game a few weeks ago, but it was played in NZ. Most games in NZ are played on Rugby grounds. Cricket is Australia’s national sport, and games are played on dedicated cricket grounds which are larger. I think this could be the deciding factor in the final about to be played – along with who wins the toss. Australia cricket is dozens of times larger than NZ cricket, in every way.

    Like

  16. Yoda says:

    The male motive force derives from males motivated to exertions to surmount females’ resistance.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Yoda says:

    That could explain why they prefer shallow men and ephemeral relationships to the ones of lasting intrinsic value

    Or perhaps stupid they are.
    Tingles uber alles

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Yoda says:

    “Women will disproportionately face harmful impacts from climate change,” Lee’s resolution reads. It continues claiming, “Food insecure women with limited socioeconomic resources may be vulnerable to situations such as sex work, transactional sex, and early marriage that put them at risk for HIV, STIs, unplanned pregnancy, and poor reproductive health.”

    Women always victims they are.

    Perhaps as solution a good man they should find.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Farm Boy says:

    Took one look at the goods and said, ‘nope–not risking all my assets and future assets on THAT’.

    This would be me.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Farm Boy says:

    Your Mother Should Know – But DOESN’T!

    This is true. My Mom never knew how women had changed. Perhaps it was better that she didn’t

    Liked by 1 person

  21. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Farm Boy,
    It makes me sad to know that your Mom is gone. She wouldn’t like any of this.
    I don’t quite know what my Mom would think.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Farm Boy,
    You should know that Mrs. Yoda had to have her inspiration come from somewhere.
    Hmmmmmm?

    Like

  23. Mmmmm cookies of betrayal and regret, yumm. (I have nothing of meaning to add, sorry!)

    I wish it were not what it is, the current smp/mmp, but….

    (Crunch, crunch, crunch…)

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Spawny Get says:

    Have a good day, Bloom

    Like

  25. Spawny Get says:

    From Dalrock’s comments.

    Guys getting married should really read Greenspun et al.’s book
    Real World Divorce: Custody, Child Support, and Alimony in the 50 States“.

    Like

  26. SFC Ton says:

    LOL women are by and large whores. Actuall whores are more honest about it but there is no fundamental difference between a woman who charges $60 to suck a dick and one who will only suck a dick if said dick is attached to a dude who makes money. The only difference is whether they seek the exchange of resources in a direct or indirect manner.

    And most things do have a larger impact on women and kids. Neither being exactly robust, driven etc… and Well both being rather childish & generally incapable of self defense

    Like

  27. jf13 says:

    re: climate change

    Women are getting hotter.

    Like

  28. jf13 says:

    Alphas are never urged by mothers to grow up; and it is alphas who reach adulthood expecting, from experience, that women will serve them like mommy did. It is betas who are forced to prove themselves to women, to provide for women, etc.

    Like

  29. jf13 says:

    re: “[Marriage] is a worthy goal”

    You might say lofty.

    Like

  30. jf13 says:

    Only 1 in 17 men had a good enough job!!
    http://www.psmag.com/#!/nature-and-technology/17-to-1-reproductive-success
    “It wasn’t like there was a mass death of males. They were there, so what were they doing?” asks mom.

    I’m not buying the “wealth and power” spin, not one bit. It’s all about multiplication. Evidently less than 10% of men had well above replacement numbers of offspring, and these offspring managed to survive to reproduce themselves. Wars, famines, and hard jobs is what made for mass reproductive deaths of beta males.

    Like

  31. Liz says:

    “there is no fundamental difference between a woman who charges $60 to suck a dick and one who will only suck a dick if said dick is attached to a dude who makes money…”

    60 bucks?!!?
    I can think of one difference. Smoker’s lines.
    Girl would have to keep pretty busy to make a living that way…

    (ebul lurking liz out…)

    Liked by 3 people

  32. Liz says:

    I mean, consider maintenance costs. Makeup, hair, nails.
    A good haircut and die job would be three dicks….One boob job would require sucking 100 dicks!

    Liked by 2 people

  33. Liz says:

    OT, I have hopes for Ted Cruz. Think about it…

    He’s the first mainstream Hispanic-Canadian-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.

    I mean, that’s a storybook, man.

    (okay, back to lurking and reading…I’ve been holding that one in a long time) 🙂

    Like

  34. Cill says:

    I wish Liz had kept her other avatar. Cuter than this one.

    Like

  35. Farm Boy says:

    “Men know they are despised and looked down on by women–especially educated [women].”

    Yes, they do know. All too well

    Notice that the Patriarchy never did this to women.

    Like

  36. Liz says:

    Thanks Cill. 🙂
    I think it was kind of distracting, though…
    this isn’t the only forum I post in, and some of the military ones are pretty much dude-only. Also, the anonymity ‘thing’.

    Liked by 1 person

  37. Cill says:

    Well I Liked on your second cutest avatar anyway.

    Like

  38. Liz says:

    😀

    Like

  39. jf13 says:

    Time to break out the demographic economic paradox.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographic-economic_paradox

    It’s not at all true that a man having a great job maks a woman want to make more babies with him. More than approximately, the better life that a woman has the fewer children she chooses to have. It’s not recent; same story over the centuries. The worse off a woman is, and the worse she is treated, the MORE she will want to reproduce. It’s not my fault.

    Like

  40. Farm Boy says:

    In mitigation, Tony Ventham said Richess – who is seven-and-a-half months pregnant by her current partner – said she felt pressured in to reporting the false claims because her former boyfriend was ‘violent’ and ‘controlling’.

    A guy is to blame even if she did it.

    Liked by 2 people

  41. thedeti says:

    blurkel:

    The thing here is that women, even your wife (and mine too) believe that men should like women, want to be with them, want to marry them, and want to spend money on them because they’re women. Because they have sexuality and sexual access — the one thing a man cannot get on his own and needs a woman for. I truly think a lot of women believe they have vaginas, they can offer sexual access, and that’s enough. Their possession of a vagina is sufficient, it makes up for all other deficiencies.

    Liked by 2 people

  42. Yoda says:

    Their possession of a vagina is sufficient, it makes up for all other deficiencies.

    Move to next post “The Thirst” you should.

    Liked by 2 people

  43. jf13 says:

    re: Because they have sexuality and sexual access

    Correction. IF they have sexuality and sexual access

    Like

  44. blurkel says:

    @thedeti

    I agree 99%, and where we differ has to do with the degree of that belief. It’s my experience that once a man is ensnared in the Tender Trap, his access to it greatly diminishes, only he’s not supposed to notice. He does notice, and eventually doesn’t care to pursue access once the cost exceeds benefit. This is where women need the law to keep them dominant in their relationships. A man extracting himself from such a situation essentially returns himself to the state he was in when he first agreed to be ensnared. Not every man is willing to pay that price, and every women trusts that her captive will not want to.

    A future post (when I can get to it) will address this in conjunction with a few other aspects of the failed modern marriage.

    Like

  45. jf13 says:

    re; “A man extracting himself from such a situation essentially returns himself to the state he was in when he first agreed to be ensnared. Not every man is willing to pay that price, and every women trusts that her captive will not want to.”

    The physical phenomenon of costs associated with attempting to return to an earlier state is called hysteresis. Apparently it’s all a woman thing.

    Like

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