Red Pill Classroom — Let’s Just Be Friends


When a woman does not want to bump a relationship up to serious status, she brings out the much used (and maligned) Let’s Just Be Friends (LJBF) line.  If a fella does not want to read more, he can stop at the next line.  You are just not good enough for her.

In actuality you might be a fine guy, and judged to be a good catch by people with a true understanding of the situation.  But for what ever reason, when she puts on her tingle colored glasses, this is what she sees,

Perhaps we should cut the woman some slack.  It can be argued that she is just trying not to hurt the fella’s feelings.  But is there more?  Perhaps she wants to keep you around for one or more of the following reasons,

1.  As plan B (or C or D) if something better does not turn up.

2.  For validation (women dig validation)

3.  For you to be an emotional tampon when needed (related to validation)

4.  As a Mr. Fix-It or a Mr. Do-it

5.  She feels really bad for screwing you over for no apparent reason and wants to salve her feelings (I have seen this)

In short — these reasons are all for her benefit and none for yours.  Is that how friends treat each other?

In my case, as my marriage was dissolving, my soon to be ex-wife suggested that we still be friends.  This was the era when I was at my supplicating beta best.  I instinctively knew that this was not the path to take.

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Posted in FarmBoy, RedPillClassroom
128 comments on “Red Pill Classroom — Let’s Just Be Friends
  1. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Been there, done that, long since thrown away the Tee shirt.
    In times past, women would not have resorted to this. Now, they keep you on speed dial for favors that only go one way.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Farm Boy says:

    If you want the benefits of a man, marry him. If you receive favors via LJBF, then you are a whore-lite.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Tarnished says:

    Two things:

    1. The very phrase sets my teeth on edge. By saying “let’s just be friends” she’s essentially telling you that she knows you’d like to be more. Hence the “just” part. This smacks of manipulation, honestly…if you truly want to be someone’s friend, there’s no “just”. Perhaps it’s because I’m much closer to my friends than the majority of my family, but a friendship is not a runner’s up prize. It’s a very strong and loyal relationship, where I’ll be glad to have you wake me at 2am to request I get you home from the bar, not because I hate sleep but because I’m grateful to know you’ll be safe and alive. “Just” a friendship sounds like the worst kind of relationship in the world.

    2. Why the hell would she assume that a guy who openly admitted to having intimate feelings for her want to stick around? That’s like saying it’s fun to rip your still-beating heart out of your chest each day.
    So frickin dumb, really.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Farm Boy says:

    That’s like saying it’s fun to rip your still-beating heart out of your chest each day.

    Well, they might consider it to be empowering.

    Perhaps somebody should tell them that just because one can do something, that does not mean that they should do that thing.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. SFC Ton says:

    I have never seen the value of female friendship. She going to bust me out of a mexican jail? Help me squat 800lbs? Split firewood? Gut deer? Figure out why bike won’t charge a battery? Remodel my bathrooms? Drink, cuss, fight and chase ass? That’s what my friends do

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Farm Boy says:

    Perhaps it’s because I’m much closer to my friends than the majority of my family, but a friendship is not a runner’s up prize. It’s a very strong and loyal relationship

    Actually it is not a runner’s up prize. LJBF is a participation prize. You participate in what she wants you to do to benefit her.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Tarnished says:

    “You participate in what she wants you to do to benefit her.”

    Or not.
    Because, excuse my language, you should have some fucking dignity and self-respect.

    Like

  8. Tarnished says:

    FB,
    You already know this, but hurting someone isn’t empowerment. It’s cruel and sadistic.

    Scfton,
    I can split firewood and remodel bathrooms. Would be willing to learn to gut a deer even though I wouldn’t eat any of it. Drink moderately, cuss a bit more than moderately, and am good at pointing out nice asses.

    None of my friends are into the other stuff you mention. We’re nerds, geeks, and gamers. Not well known for doing massive squats or ending up in foreign jail cells. Most guys don’t have female friends because they have no common interests or hobbies…

    Like

  9. theasdgamer says:

    “You want a friend? Get a dog. C ya round.”

    Like

  10. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Do you know what put my friend up this tree?
    “Let’s just be friends.”

    Liked by 4 people

  11. Yoda says:

    Important this subject to the bear it is.

    Like

  12. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Karen Straughan had to deal with a LJBF proposal. It’s covered in her “NiceGuy” video if you want it straight from her mouth. She countered with an ultimatum, “the whole ‘enchilada’ or nothing”.

    Farm Boy,
    I can see your new ex trying that. Have all the benefit of you without reciprocity, i.e. all the favors go to her.

    This post will likely attract a minimum of comments. It’s painful and degrading. I have seen feminist arguments defending this. They tend to take away my appetite.

    Like

  13. Yoda says:

    “It is essential… that she starts to work now,” said the judge, who ordered that her personal maintenance payments from her ex-husband must cease, with a gradual tailing off over a five-year period leading up to his retirement.

    Mark Johnston, for the wife, challenging that ruling, protested that having to care for a 10-year-old – the couple’s older daughter being a boarding pupil at a public school – “is an inherent restriction on her ability to develop any kind of earning capacity in the next five years.”

    He warned that Judge Roberts’ order would cause “a plummeting in the standard of living” of the youngest child,

    Hide behind the children she does.

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Yoda says:

    I have seen feminist arguments defending this.

    Possible this would be?

    Like

  15. Yoda says:

    They tend to take away my appetite.

    Bears are always hungry are they not?

    Like

  16. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Yoda,
    The arguments revolved around “men being entitled to sex”.
    Bears usually are hungry. Mrs. Yoda would not want me as a houseguest for long.

    Like

  17. Nexus says:

    Been there, got that many times. I got tired of being use, never again i will accept the just be friends thing.

    Like

  18. Spawny Get says:

    In olden days that conversation would have taken place when I was invested in the idea of more, so it would (was) painful. Post red pill? Very different. Not being very worried about what the answer is is very helpful. It also sends a very different message to princess when she delivers her answer. Remember guys; YOU are the prize.

    There’s not a lot of utility in having a female friend for a guy, but a couple helped keep my house running while I was away. I’ve been slightly generous in repaying them, casually, over the years. They are friends, just not what I call real male style mates (the next level).

    I could do ljbf if I thought it was going to do something for me. I wouldn’t invest in the friendship. In fact I’d keep a sharp eye on who did what for whom. Friendship as casual acquaintance, rather than friendship perhaps?

    Liked by 2 people

  19. Spawny Get says:

    Re: “I could do ljbf if I thought it was going to do something for me.”

    Beware of planning to get with her friends after the LJBF, by the way, any of her fiends that you try to open will be made aware (if they weren’t already) that you weren’t good enough for Girl #1.

    Leaving Girl #2 these options:
    1) (G2 thinks she’s better than G#1) nuclear rejection to show that she’s insulted that you (unworthy of Girl #1) would even consider her.
    2) Accept you along with the shit sandwich that she’s publicly signalling she’s worth less than G1
    3) Bravely (yeah right, happens alllll the time) declare that G1 was wrong to reject you. Ensuing bitch fight includes highlights of G1 trashing you in every way possible to justify her low opinion of you.

    I’m not saying that G1 can’t pay off as an entry into a more promising social circle, just that the path is tricky. Better if you can plausibly deny ever chasing G1, but only a brave man plays on girls’ natural turf in this way. You probably need player abilities to pull it off, or a huge amount of patience.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Liz says:

    I always thought LJBF was a (relatively) ‘nice’ way of letting the guy down “easily” (as opposed to “I don’t find you attractive” or some such). I’ve never really been single, so I’ve never had to use it. Tarn, what do you say when you “let guys down”? Or Molly? Or Bloom?

    Like

  21. Tarnished says:

    “They are friends, just not what I call real male style mates (the next level).”

    This is a good example of the different levels of friendship. I have a few casual acquaintances who are women that I get along with, but they aren’t true friends. Contrary to what the gender critical feminists who’ve been mocking my blog think, I have tried to make female friends. But ever since 8th grade, when the 5 I’d been friends with for 3 years all turned on me for not following the herd, I’ve found it to be very difficult. Even when they are gamers too, it hasn’t worked out. One even attempted to make me into what can only be called a “beta orbiter”.

    I think female friendships are possible between 2 women or a man and a woman, but they are not the same as male mateship. The minds of 2 masculine people are on a different wavelength, and it’s almost like comparing night and day.

    Like

  22. SFC Ton says:

    I don’t see the point in being friends with females and reckon if you are a dude with female friends you are probably pretty low on the masculine quotient

    Like

  23. Liz says:

    Just thinking further after dropping the kids off at school (procrastinating cleaning…).
    There are different scenarios/contextual situations here.

    -One, the person who has been a friend for weeks/months and then attempts to start a “relationship”. I can understand a person saying that they want to stay friends instead. At that point it’s up to the interested party to decide whether he or she (he in this case) wants to cut bait. But if the entire point of “friendship” was an attempt to get into the woman’s pants that was friendship under false pretenses anyway, wasn’t it? One could say she “should have known” but…I’m not sure why. Women don’t think the way men do, and they don’t like confrontation either…they’d far rather throw out the “let’s stay friends” than the “your breath smells” or something.

    -Two, the breakup. I’ve never maintained friendships after breakups (my breakups were never easy and “clean”…I had to state exactly why I was breaking up with them, and there really was no friendship possible at that point), but I can see why a couple would want to keep it amicable for the kids, for instance. Situational context applies.

    Liked by 2 people

  24. Emma the Emo says:

    It doesn’t have to be so manipulative. It could also mean

    1. She wants to see if hanging out with the guy will make romantic feelings suddenly materialize in her. She both wants to find a boyfriend, and to give this romantically-interested male friend more of a chance. Especially true is she feels romantic involvement is best started after a relatively long period of getting to know each other.

    2. She genuinely thinks friendship is possible, even after one party became interested in something more.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Emma the Emo says:

    Tarnished,

    Your first point answers your second point. The reason why a man is still supposed to be interested in friendship, is because friendship is so great. I mean, why complain about the FRIENDzone, if it’s so cool to be in?

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Spawny Get says:

    The problem, I think, is that Liz’ 1 is what is sold to men and boys

    She wants to see if hanging out with the guy will make romantic feelings suddenly materialize in her. She both wants to find a boyfriend, and to give this romantically-interested male friend more of a chance.

    But the reality is much, much more likely on Farm Boy’s list in the post body

    1. As plan B (or C or D) if something better does not turn up.
    2. For validation (women dig validation)
    3. For you to be an emotional tampon when needed (related to validation)
    4. As a Mr. Fix-It or a Mr. Do-it
    5. She feels really bad for screwing you over for no apparent reason and wants to salve her feelings (I have seen this)

    And wherever it is on that list, it doesn’t involve her doing anything for the guy. When she has something to be done / solved…then they’re friends after all, of course he should help. #HeForShe

    Male-Female ‘friendships’ are very much usually an appalling investment for a man.

    As I said above, I have a couple of female friends (who are partners of male friends of mine) who Aren’t Like That…BUT…What they can do for me is pretty limited. They have done things like Ton’s Majordomo does. It’s not impossible that women bring anything to the table, they just seldom do. Why would a princess have to keep up her side of a relationship to a peasant, after all?

    Liked by 2 people

  27. Tarnished says:

    Emma,

    Friendship, if it’s a real one, *is* great. Mateship, as Spawny calls it, is even better.

    But if I was in a position where I bared my heart for someone and they didn’t reciprocate, it would likely be extremely painful to continously be around them. A friendship has to start from and remain in that foundation.

    One of my coworkers recently lost a male “friend” because of this. She didn’t return his feelings, and he made the decision to break all ties with her rather than pretend to still “just be friends”. Of course, she posted the situation on Facebook and was getting tons of sympathy while he gets called shallow and butthurt. Because looking out for your own mental/ emotional well being is “bad”. 😡

    Like

  28. Tarnished says:

    New post is up.

    Like

  29. Liz says:

    If she posted the situation on Facebook, she’s a cunt, not a friend. What the hell is wrong with people?

    Liked by 1 person

  30. Spawny Get says:

    “Because looking out for your own mental/ emotional well being is “bad””

    Only for men. For women? It’s a blank cheque* to unleash whatever she wants on the guy.

    (*and yes that’s how cheque is spelled – suck on it. One checks one’s oil. One writes cheques.)

    Liked by 1 person

  31. Tarnished says:

    A good way to see if she’s a user or honestly wants to be friends would be to ask for favors right off the bat.

    You have a flight coming up? See if she’ll drive you to the airport.

    Going away for a few days? Ask her to watch your pets, collect your mail, etc.

    “Forgot” your wallet and are supposed to meet her for lunch? Now is a good time to find out if she’ll spring for both of you.

    If she is willing to do these things (or whatever you come up with) then she’s sincere in believing friendship is possible between the two of you. If she balks at them and does not even offer to help later on/gets offended by these requests…well, then she was just planning on your “friendship” being a one-way street.

    Liked by 2 people

  32. Liz says:

    The horror of the way these women behave is connected to their protection in the “herd” (group of women, which in turn receive protection as a group via the men…regardless of their conduct).

    That’s probably why ‘loner’ types of women don’t understand any of this. I read Tarn’s new post and I just can’t imagine behaving that way towards a person.

    Liked by 1 person

  33. Liz says:

    “I just can’t imagine behaving that way towards a person.”

    By that I mean…asserting he is a ‘creep’ or laughing at him, or anything listed along those lines.

    Liked by 2 people

  34. Spawny Get says:

    And I believe you Liz. And Tarn’s attitude as described here for that matter.

    Liked by 1 person

  35. Spawny Get says:

    “the way these women behave is connected to their protection in the “herd””

    This might be key, I see no value in conversing with willing herdees, so I don’t.

    Like

  36. Tarnished says:

    Liz,

    And yet, it happens.

    And if you think being laughed at or called creepy for asking someone out, just wait till you read this:
    https://archive.today/seaP4

    It was featured on Black Pill’s blog last night, and my mind is still reeling from the implications of what this means as a precedent for male-female relations.

    “America isn’t gynocentric”?
    My ass, it’s not.

    Liked by 1 person

  37. Liz says:

    Swithy: “The problem, I think, is that Liz’ 1 is what is sold to men and boys..(snipped for brevity)”

    I agree with you, Swithy. But keep in mind (no rotten tomatoes, please) that women receive false messages too. Currently it’s the message that they’re super awesome and sluthood is empowering. So, they slut around, simultaneously stinking up the environment (literally and figuratively) and devaluing themselves all at once. And there’s no going back. She can’t ‘unslut’ herself as easily as a guy can “unfriend”.

    Liked by 1 person

  38. Liz says:

    I mean, I think it would be better for everyone (and the ‘nice guy’ would stand a far better chance, and a lot better treatment) if women weren’t receiving the ‘have fun and ride lots of cocks until you’re worn out’ message.

    Liked by 1 person

  39. theasdgamer says:

    I think that any man who doesn’t have a few female friends is socially limited.

    My female friends share booze with me, invite me to parties, fix my collar when it’s crooked, etc. I discuss Mrs. Gamer with a few of them occasionally. Not sure that I do much for them, honestly.

    Like

  40. Emma the Emo says:

    Tarnished,

    I understand what you’re saying. Getting angry and vindictive because someone didn’t want to be friends with you is jerk behavior. But sometimes the guy doesn’t leave after LJBF, and the girl might think the friendship is working.

    Like

  41. theasdgamer says:

    Liz has swallowed the Blue Pill again.

    if women weren’t receiving the ‘have fun and ride lots of cocks until you’re worn out’ message.

    Let’s fix this. “if women weren’t riding lots of c0cks”. They do it because they enjoy it, not because of some “message”.

    Like

  42. Yoda says:

    women weren’t receiving the ‘have fun and ride lots of cocks until you’re worn out’ message.

    The force guides you it does.
    An upcoming post on riding cocks there would be.
    An unpcoming post on “fun” there would be.

    Like

  43. theasdgamer says:

    I’ve gotten the LJBF message twice. I had romantic feelings (wasn’t thinking about getting in pants) and I immediately discontinued contact. (This was back in the days when I thought that sex occurred in the context of romance.) I needed the separation so that the feelings would die and it was also a bad investment of my time. Continuing to be around those women would only have resulted in constant emotional pain. Women like to cause pain and use men to whom they are not sexually attracted. Otoh, they like to be hurt by and used by men to whom they are sexually attracted.

    Like

  44. Spawny Get says:

    Gamer,
    female instincts (like male ones) would be to have fun, I expect.

    But the slut path was much, much less common in the past. Why might that be? Part of it, I claim, is that older women used to teach girls that their cherry was a valuable thing when it came to getting the provider pack mule with the highest pedigree. That message is long gone in the public yugogrrrilll narrative.

    All I’m saying is that the public narrative does matter to the female herd. As tragic as that currently proves. Choicy’s post described a fcuking catastrophic female attitude to my mind.

    Liked by 1 person

  45. Liz says:

    theasdgamer:
    “Let’s fix this. “if women weren’t riding lots of c0cks”. They do it because they enjoy it, not because of some “message”.”

    Social conditioning applies. If the costs were high for this behavior, they wouldn’t act as they do. Encouragement brings on the behavior. Furthermore, I maintain that a great portion of the ‘crazy behavior’ women engage in today after riding so many cocks is due to the fact that they feel used. Ultimately, that behavior is unfulfilling (filling, heh) in the extreme.

    Lots’ of people like chewing gum. Yet in Singapore they have far less gum in their sneakers.

    Liked by 2 people

  46. Liz says:

    There was a suicide by a USAF Reservist, stationed in Florida, that hit the papers recently. Her family is attempting to come up with reasons why she killed herself and they’ve decided it must have been a prior incident of sexual assault. The woman was very pretty, 30 years old.

    There is no basis in evidence whatsoever to have formed the conclusion that she was assaulted, but with a history of chronic depression and anxiety, heavy tobacco and alcohol use, and a current breakup (and the fact that every woman that pretty I have ever known, who was in the military, was a nutcase and slut), there is much reason to believe her sexual history fueled anxiety/depression/alcohol abuse/ and the crazy which led to her eventual suicide.

    Like

  47. Tarnished says:

    “Social conditioning applies.”

    That it does. Girls and boys start virgin shaming each other as early as 10th grade, at least where I was. Girls will unmercifully tease and taunt other girls who haven’t had sex by age 15 or 16, and boys will call you a prude/frigid. There’s much peer pressure to have sex for girls out there…perhaps just as much as boys deal with.

    Liked by 1 person

  48. Yoda says:

    asserting he is a ‘creep’ or laughing at him, or anything listed along those lines.

    They do this because of power they do have.
    Use poorly they do.

    Like

  49. Yoda says:

    “Of” instead of “if” it should be.
    [SG – fixed. You’re hard enough to follow without that chicanery ;D]

    Like

  50. theasdgamer says:

    Why do women ride the carousel?

    1. To have fun riding alpha c0ck. Alpha Fux “5 minutes of alpha is better than a lifetime of beta.”

    2. To have a shot at getting an alpha to commit using sex to secure that commitment. Women use their bodies to gain commitment from alphas and use alphas’ bodies for their own pleasure.

    Women aren’t simply being used and getting nothing in return. Tradcon ideas about women being “used” are simply lies. Tradcons need to go read the Bible sometime.

    But she who gives herself to wanton pleasure is dead even while she lives. (1 Tim. 5:6)

    Women have sex because they enjoy it.

    Of course, the “women are being used” trope is standard FI propaganda–tradcon version.

    Like

  51. Yoda says:

    Girls will unmercifully tease and taunt other girls who haven’t had sex by age 15 or 16

    “Be a slut” they do say.
    Understand implications they do not.

    Liked by 1 person

  52. theasdgamer says:

    @ Liz

    Social conditioning applies. If the costs were high for this behavior….

    Or not so much anymore. Costs have been removed, so unless you want to go back in time….

    I maintain that a great portion of the ‘crazy behavior’ women engage in today after riding so many cocks is due to the fact that they feel used.

    And I maintain that you are Hamsterizing the failure of women’s strategy to secure Alpha commitment. Women “feel used” after their strategy fails when they hit the Wall without alpha commitment. Not so much before then. Tradcon v. Red Pill

    Some women can’t bring themselves to switch lanes to BetaBux, so they go crazy, do drugs, commit suicide, whatever. Maybe they are alpha widows….

    Like

  53. Liz says:

    I never said that women are being used, I said they feel used.

    Liked by 1 person

  54. Yoda says:

    There is no basis in evidence whatsoever to have formed the conclusion that she was assaulted

    A man at fault he must be.
    Princess pure she was

    Liked by 2 people

  55. Liz says:

    We’ll have to disagree, theasdgamer. Our life experiences around crazy slut behavior are obviously very very very different.

    Like

  56. theasdgamer says:

    Spawny,

    I think that the herd narrative helps to lessen women’s ASD overall, so it has some impact on their behavior, maybe. Women started slutting around back when I was in college, long ago. The herd narrative back then was tradcon.

    Like

  57. theasdgamer says:

    @ Liz

    I know lots of sluts (N>10).

    Like

  58. Liz says:

    theasdgamer: Lucky you.

    Like

  59. Liz says:

    For some reason I’m reminded of ‘yo mamma’ jokes.
    ‘You think yo sluts are slutty? My sluts have rugburns on their foreheads!’

    Like

  60. Liz says:

    Forgot to add:
    😛

    Like

  61. Tarnished says:

    Nobody is saying women are pristine angels or would be asexually inclined if it weren’t for those horny men…Those of us who are clitorally endowed have libidos and hormones too, which should be obvious to anyone who’s ever been 14. It’s just that, in general, women are known to cave to peer pressure easier/quicker than men do…this goes double for high school ages.

    Neither boys nor girls should ever think they *must* have sex in order to be considered popular, or mature, or an adult. It’d be great if virgin shaming wasn’t a thing anyone had to deal with. But it is, an since it’s far easier for a 16 year old girl to find a random sex partner than a 16 year old boy, there’s more of a chance they’ll see an opportunity to get their friends/frenemies off their back and just go for it. If anything, they’d be using the guy in this situation.

    Liked by 1 person

  62. Yoda says:

    Some women can’t bring themselves to switch lanes to BetaBux, so they go crazy, do drugs, commit suicide, whatever.

    Such a come-down it is.
    Feel sorry one does not.
    The apex of first world problems this is.

    Liked by 3 people

  63. Spawny Get says:

    “Of course, the “women are being used” trope is standard FI propaganda–tradcon version.”

    it’s also saying that such women are gucking fullible idiots. I didn’t give any excuses. You do what you want to do, baby. but the consequences are yours to own. I wouldn’t give the PPPs the time of day. I had nothing to do with them ending up broken like they are; empowered cum receptacles that actually go foraging for business.

    Liked by 2 people

  64. Liz says:

    Exactly, Tarn and Swithy. I wish I could like those last posts twice.

    Like

  65. theasdgamer says:

    What is going on in the heads of young women who are sexing an alpha?

    1. Emotional high from being desired by a hawt guy.

    2. Oxytocin cascade.

    3. Validation. Maybe I repeat myself from 1.

    4. Lurve. Maybe I repeat myself from 2.

    5. Thinking that the alpha lurves her. Delusional, of course. Projection.

    Then the alpha dumps her at some point. Probably not a ONS. Maybe STR or LTR.

    Then she “feels used” because he didn’t feel what she did and have the same desire for commitment that she did. Because projection and solipsism.

    Like

  66. theasdgamer says:

    Women love the feelz that an alpha gives them. They aren’t gullible after the first time or two.

    Like

  67. Liz says:

    theasdgamer: “Then the alpha dumps her at some point. Probably not a ONS. Maybe STR or LTR.

    Then she “feels used” because he didn’t feel what she did and have the same desire for commitment that she did. Because projection and solipsism.”

    Are you now agreeing that the women feel used?

    Like

  68. Tarnished says:

    “What is going on in the heads of young women who are sexing an alpha?”

    I’d actually like to hear from both a promiscuous woman and man what goes on in their heads…

    Like

  69. Spawny Get says:

    Gamer
    “Women started slutting around back when I was in college, long ago”

    I was an UG in the mid-late eighties. Thinking back I only remember one girl being widely called a slut (behind her back as far as I saw). It wasn’t good in any way. But that’s a decent UK Uni thirty years ago, so…

    Even that far back a lot of US teen comedies were all about cherries and kegs, seemed whack to me even then. Maybe the keg thing is what happens when you have ridiculous alcohol laws, 21? FFS.

    Liked by 1 person

  70. Tarnished says:

    Movies like those helped me to decide that off campus living was likely preferable (not to mention cheaper).

    Like

  71. Liz says:

    Sarah Hoyt wrote an interesting article on friendship in December (she shares my feelings about sexual profligacy bringing on the cray cray too, but I couldn’t find that article yet…ran into this one instead).

    http://accordingtohoyt.com/2014/12/18/lets-call-it-friendship/

    Like

  72. Liz says:

    Excuse me “shares my feelings” while technically accurate in the strictly vernacular sense, is probably going to receive instant criticism. Please scratch that to be “agrees with my perspective”.

    Like

  73. theasdgamer says:

    @ Liz

    Are you now agreeing that the women feel used?

    I’m feeling like I’ve been gamed. Oh, wait, that’s not really a feeling. Happy, sad, cheery are emotional feelings. “Used” is not a feeling.

    “Feeling used” is ex post facto Hamsterization.

    “I didn’t get him to commit” becomes “He used me.” “Feelz” is added because it adds feminine emotional weight to her implicit claim that she was used. She doesn’t claim it explicitly so that she can deny that that’s what she was claiming. She sets up her frame as the explicatory frame for what happens so that she can deny that she was pleasure-seeking and wanton.

    Like

  74. Yoda says:

    about sexual profligacy bringing on the cray cray

    Interesting to know the process it would be.

    Liked by 1 person

  75. Yoda says:

    “What is going on in the heads of young women who are sexing an alpha?”

    Tingles Uber Alles

    Like

  76. Yoda says:

    The horror of the way these women behave is connected to their protection in the “herd” (group of women, which in turn receive protection as a group via the men…regardless of their conduct).

    Some cultural norms slow to die they are.
    Women virtuous and protected they must be.
    Unhappy women will be when no more it is.

    Like

  77. Liz says:

    ““Feeling used” is ex post facto Hamsterization.”

    The mechanism doesn’t matter. The result matters. As I said before, sexual profligacy is incentivized, this results in sexual profligacy and women are, by and large, not biologically programmed to ride lots and lots of cock for “fun”…though they might hamsterize that they are having fun, this behavior makes them crazy over time. It’s VERY VERY well demonstrated in my experience.

    Liked by 1 person

  78. Yoda says:

    women are, by and large, not biologically programmed to ride lots and lots of cock for “fun”

    For “fun” not.
    For sperm yes.

    Like

  79. Yoda says:

    Problem from different motivations it comes.
    Post soon there will be.

    Liked by 1 person

  80. Liz says:

    It doesn’t take lots and lots of cocks for sperm, Yoda. Only one fully functioning one, actually.

    If the ‘lots of cock’ paradigm were true, it is a strange an odd think that the fewer sexual partners a female spouse has had, the happier and more content she is with her partner. It would be the opposite case.

    Like

  81. Liz says:

    Furthermore, if the ‘lots of cocks for happiness’ meter were a real thing, sluts would be the happiest people on earth (unless and until they’re too old to ride) rather than the poorly adjusted nutty malcontents they tend to be…and that’s way, way before they hit the wall.

    Like

  82. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    It’s not the alphas, cads, and players that are getting LJBFed.
    I just remembered the childhood joke about a match burning twice.

    Liz,
    It is curious how, in the matter of suicide, when it’s a good looking woman, it goes on page one. If iit’s a guy, it’ll be in the secnd section, if at all.

    Liked by 1 person

  83. theasdgamer says:

    @ Liz

    sexual profligacy is incentivized

    No, the driving force is hypergamy, not some vague incentivization.

    Girl’s hypergamy drives her to sex up alpha 1. She’s one of his plates and he’s her only partner. He dumps her.

    Rinse and repeat ad nauseam.

    not biologically programmed to ride lots and lots of cock for “fun”

    They are driven by hypergamy to ride alpha c0ck for fun. If they haven’t already selected a hawt guy, they will find the hawtest guy available.

    they might hamsterize that they are having fun

    You have this exactly back-ass-wards. Girls hamsterize ex post facto that they are NOT having fun.

    this behavior makes them crazy over time.

    I don’t know about crazy. I do know that it makes them unsuitable for LTRs.

    Like

  84. theasdgamer says:

    @ Liz

    the happier and more content she is with her partner

    Happier and content depend on the wind, tides, and currents. Fluid. In flux.

    She’s unhaaappy when her sexual strategy of getting alpha commitment fails.

    When alpha c0ck fills her, it’s all about the c0ck. In the moment, she’s happy.

    Like

  85. Liz says:

    Again, we’ll have to disagree theasdgamer.

    No one has to be drunk off their goard in order to entice themselves into doing something that comes naturally, instinctively, and such a truly fulfilling proposition (heh).

    Like

  86. theasdgamer says:

    Women are all crazy at times. When a man treats a woman well, she treats him like 5h1t. And vice-versa. Even women who haven’t ridden the CC. That’s crazy. I see no reason to believe that women’s craziness is in any way dependent on them riding the carousel.

    Like

  87. Liz says:

    “I see no reason to believe that women’s craziness is in any way dependent on them riding the carousel.”

    Well…that’s probably the difference there. In my life I have seen a direct correlation between sluttery and nuttery.

    Aside from the stuff that has been linked to in this forum before, if memory serves (correlation between lower number of partners and contentment with partner) it makes biological sense to me, too. Studies on the hormones women release during sex seem to indicate women tend to get attached to their sexual partners in an emotional way. Furthermore, natural-female-sluts would be less likely to have a male who stood by them, looked after the kids, and made sure everyone survived – necessary things in times without government welfare.

    Liked by 1 person

  88. blurkel says:

    ” I’ve never maintained friendships after breakups”

    Wise words, Liz. I have found that when a relationship ends, there was a reason and it doesn’t go away with time. If it was sufficient to break up a couple, it is too egregious to allow friendship.

    If I had a dollar for every time I heard LJBF, I could retire in style. It got to the point that I would avoid social events just to ensure that this would not again happen to me. Hindsight showed me that I only interested women who had no other options, so what was I really missing except more misery and rejection.

    Yet I’m married, and have been for a long time. Had I been a Red Pill type when younger, the marriage wouldn’t have happened. But I finally got to it after using up the excuses such platitudes offered to those on the Blue Pill lifestyle. They no longer sufficed to keep me in the realm of “But this is how it’s supposed to be!” I was sure there had to be a better way, as I saw this happen for others. I felt it was time it happened for me.

    I had to go through a long path in Hell to reach the other side of this crap, and I had to distance myself from those so enmeshed with it that they can’t see or imagine anything else. My only real satisfaction in that odyssey is that my sons won’t repeat my mistakes.

    Like

  89. Yoda says:

    seen a direct correlation between sluttery and nuttery.

    Nuts are sluts it might be.

    Like

  90. Yoda says:

    , natural-female-sluts would be less likely to have a male who stood by them, looked after the kids, and made sure everyone survived

    But alpha seed like they do.
    Pull them in different direction it does.

    Like

  91. Yoda says:

    But I finally got to it after using up the excuses such platitudes offered to those on the Blue Pill lifestyle.

    Work hard to keep you on plantation they do.

    Like

  92. Spawny Get says:

    The ladies on the slutwalks aren’t exactly models of stability

    Liked by 1 person

  93. Liz says:

    Sorry, blurkel. I wish I could say something helpful. 😦
    But you DO also have your sons, and that is a very good thing.

    Thinking further on what I stated above, I’m not asserting that ONLY sluts are crazy, and I hope it didn’t come across that way (lots of women are cray cray, or have some cray cray tendencies…I believe that our high maintenance equipment makes it so…there’s little escape from some underlying level of nutty).

    But there are definitely different levels of nuttery/crazy chick, and sluts are generally among the very worst, and I don’t think that’s simply a coincidence.

    Liked by 1 person

  94. Liz says:

    Per slutwalks:
    Imagine a bunch of black people challenging stereotypes and demanding respect via organizing a parade where they ate watermelon and fried chicken, spoke in ‘jive’, and sported large fake afro wigs. These women are seriously, certifiably crazy.

    Liked by 1 person

  95. Yoda says:

    The ladies on the slutwalks aren’t exactly models of stability

    Not always true this is.
    Often much weight low they do have.
    Capsize they will not.

    Liked by 2 people

  96. Spawny Get says:

    Kind of like Weebles? ‘Weebles wobble but they won’t fall down’

    http://weebles-wobble.com/weeble-gallery.php

    Couldn’t find Slut Weeble, sorry.

    Liked by 1 person

  97. @ tarn I agree, as far as virgin shaming. Maybe that’s changed with the abstinence pledge movement etc but when I was in high school, mid to late 1980s, indeed the pressure to “get it over with” started 9th or 10th grade.

    @ Liz I agree sleeping around does seem to lead to emotional problems later. Or maybe earlier, as many of the true “sluts” back in high school, turned out, had been sexually abused in childhood which can often lead to later promiscuity. Or the opposite, becoming fridgid.

    My college roomie started to do the ons thing in her 20s, selling it as she was empowered but in reality I think she was hoping these guys would fall in love w her if the sex was good. I tried and tried to tell her that if she wanted ltr/marriage she was reducing her odds not increasing them by going so fast. She did become more and more unstable, I started to worry she had a sex addiction or something in her 30s. She did have a ons with her now husband and somehow that did “work” I guess but I have not talked to her for some time. They married at 38, started trying to have a baby two years later but it didnt happen. I was expecting my youngest at that time and I think that was too hard for her to be around pregnancy. (She lives in another state too, so distance.) I have wondered how things are going, and if she’s happy and faithful. Hope so but from what I know red pill wise….

    Anyway an example, I agree w gamer she didnt regret it at the time, it would only be after the p and d that she’d get emotional and hurt, even though going in she would act like it was “no strings, I am ok w it” kinda like the ppp are described.

    I would argue women are biologically programmed to bond after sex, bc back in the day sex might mean babies and she’d need a man. I have seen women bond to guys who are totally wrong for them bc of sex. If a gal doesn’t bind, like ppp 1 in the other post, something has gone wrong, very wrong. At that point chances of her ever being able to bond are likely very slim. I did wonder if ppp 1 had been sexually abused as a child, her behavior truly was like a prostitute, a free one at that! I’d wager if someone observed her over time, they would find her pretty cray cray.

    Liked by 1 person

  98. theasdgamer says:

    Oh, considering that 96% of women under 30 are sluts (N>10), then Liz’s son’s will have an abundance of cray-cray to sift through.

    Like

  99. Liz says:

    Could you provide a source for that statistic, theasdgamer?

    Liked by 1 person

  100. theasdgamer says:

    @ Liz

    No one has to be drunk off their goard in order to entice themselves into doing something that comes naturally, instinctively, and such a truly fulfilling proposition (heh).

    No alcohol was involved with my engaged fling. And several months afterwards, when we were dancing together, she was sporting a 5h1t-eating grin as she continuously stared at me while we danced. She was remembering our fulfilling (heh) times. Never saw her as anything but strictly lucid–more than most men. Brilliant, blond, and beautiful–a math major. Died with no kids and a concurrently-deceased husband (not the man that she was engaged to when I knew her–she broke up with him several months after we danced together). Church-going girl when she passed away.

    I suspect that most date-related sex and hookups aren’t fueled by alcohol either. ONS are comparatively rare. Alcohol was only involved in one of my same-night/day petting-foolishness sexcapades–all the rest were strictly abstinent (heh). I don’t know if there are statistics linking ONS with alcohol consumption.

    Like

  101. theasdgamer says:

    @ Liz

    Could you provide a source for that statistic, theasdgamer?

    “Females 30-44 report an average of 4 male sexual partners in their lifetime ”

    http://www.kinseyinstitute.org/resources/FAQ.html#number

    I figure that underreporting by women is about 1/3 of reality and that the younger women are more sexually active than the older women. One woman I know had 6 bf’s in the last year, not including ONS.

    Like

  102. Tarnished says:

    Liz,

    I was gonna say…for 96% of women 30 and under to have 10+ partners, that would drastically skew the averages Cill found in one of his PPP posts. I can’t find it right now, but he had a reliable source that said the average N for women in the US and UK was 7. Then there’s people like myself who have only 1, Molly who’s a virgin, and yourself/Emma/Bloom who I recall have very low Ns.

    It doesn’t quite add up.

    Like

  103. theasdgamer says:

    Women change their answers depending on whether or not they believe they will be caught out not telling the truth, the researchers found. The number of sexual partners a woman reported nearly doubled when women thought they were hooked up to a lie detector machine.

    http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn3936-fake-liedetector-reveals-womens-sex-lies.html#.VOzsMf10zq4

    Of course, we should simply believe what women say because women are so awesome and would never lie about their number of partners.

    Like

  104. Tarnished says:

    Nobody stated as such, asdgamer.

    Asking for more data/evidence to support a statement is not an attack on the person making the statement.

    Liked by 1 person

  105. Liz says:

    theasdgamer: “Females 30-44 report an average of 4 male sexual partners in their lifetime.
    I figure that underreporting by women is about 1/3 of reality and that the younger women are more sexually active than the older women.”

    From the polygraph link: “Women who thought their responses might be read said they had had an average of 2.6 sexual partners, compared with 3.4 partners for those who thought their answers were anonymous. But those who thought they would be caught out by the polygraph reported an average of 4.4 partners.”

    Anonymous responses, according to the above, were one partner off of the polygraph (77.3 percent of reality, not 33 percent of reality). Furthermore, since the link indicates a (confirmed, polygraph) average of 4.4 partners for the 18 to 25 crowd this itself would dispute your claim…unless of course they get very very busy those last 4.5 years….busy enough to compensate for lost time and bring the under 30 average to over 10 partners (which would require a lot more than 5 more partners, being…an average).

    Like

  106. Liz says:

    “I suspect that most date-related sex and hookups aren’t fueled by alcohol either.”
    I suspect the same. Thought actual dates were passe these days though? Especially for the PPP/slut crowd?

    “ONS are comparatively rare. “
    Not for sluts, they aren’t.

    Like

  107. theasdgamer says:

    Even the religious woman who was “waiting for marriage to have sex” gave a bj.

    http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/advice/a5725/whats-your-sexual-score/

    Every guy, specifically every comedian (double specifically Chris Rock) knows that a woman’s number is a whole lot of hooey. You say ten; (after probably throwing up in his mouth a little) he realizes you meant 17. And it’s not that you’re lying, it’s just dudes consider any “crossing the threshold” to be sex. (We were raised on sports in which “breaking the plane” counts as scoring: football, soccer, hockey, goat racing, etc.) And, per our buds over at The Frisky, gals have some sexual encounters that they just don’t count.

    http://www.yourtango.com/200927810/sexual-history-why-your-number-doesnt-matter

    Like the odd BJ doesn’t count or where there was coitus interruptus.

    Like

  108. theasdgamer says:

    @ Liz

    Thought actual dates were passe these days though?

    The way it works in college is often attraction and hookup. For women not in college, a date is typically done at first, possibly followed by hookups with or without dates.

    “ONS are comparatively rare. “
    Not for sluts, they aren’t.

    I think that even sluts may be doing serial monogamy with the emphasis on STR of 2-6 months. ONS would still be rare for most of them.

    http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2014/06/16/one-night-stands-5-shocking-facts-about-the-science-of-hooking-up/

    Like

  109. Cill says:

    Tarn, you mentioned “the averages Cill found in one of his PPP posts”

    The average N for women were:

    Australia: 7
    UK: 7
    NZ: 20
    U.S.A: 4 (National Survey of Family Growth http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/nsfg/key_statistics.htm)
    World: 7

    I’ve given the link for U.S.A stats because it’s the most pertinent to the discussion. I could dig out the others if requested.

    Like

  110. Yoda says:

    Post written I have.
    Thursday night it would be.

    Liked by 1 person

  111. Liz says:

    Wow, that NZ number is especially high.
    PPP snatches are basically ‘gloryholes’ is would seem.

    (to those unfamiliar with the term, it’s a slang for holes in public restrooms between the stalls, typically where anonymous homosexual sex takes place).

    Like

  112. Yoda says:

    Relevant this is

    Agree I do

    Like

  113. Yoda says:

    Disappoint they did not.
    Their future children do weep.

    Liked by 1 person

  114. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Those numbers for the US from the CDC seem low, very low. While I have nothing to back up my contention, it would not surprise me if the curve for women’s N count had a double bell curve. There would be the bell for relatively innocent and one for our favorite topics.

    Another thought, I think it’s first slut and then, nut.

    Like

  115. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    I saw this and had to share. It’s uplifting and we need a little of that.

    http://uncabob.blogspot.com/2015/02/when-things-get-just-little-bit-tough.html

    Liked by 1 person

  116. Liz says:

    That was awesome, fuzzie! Thanks so much for sharing that! 🙂
    I, too, needed that.

    Like

  117. blurkel says:

    That flick quacks me up.

    Liked by 1 person

  118. SFC Ton says:

    When I read people say what sluts women in the usa are I always wonder how much time overseas said folks have and that bit of intell proves my wondering

    I travel a lot for work so it’s easy to believe

    Like

  119. Farm Boy says:

    Ton,

    So how do American women compare the the rest of the world from what you have seen?

    Like

  120. SFC Ton says:

    Less sultty, less crazy,meaner by far, fatter by far until middle age then it seems to even out.

    Like

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