A married MGTOW speaks. Elements of what he says will sound familiar to most here.

As I previously said, I’d like this blog to become more of a community effort than ‘my’ blog. I just don’t have all that many views to share, nor do I crave the limelight. The only reason that I createdI want a masculine tone, but optimistic in outlook. I want men to take the red-pill and then decide how to take their life forward. Sometimes, however, things need to be said that aren’t up-beat. Things that address the deep feelings of many of the type of men that have found a home in the manosphere. Descriptions of the experiences of many of those here.

This post is a result of inviting a commenter on Tarn’s blog to share his story in whatever way he saw fit. Cautiously Pessimistic didn’t make a drama out of the discussion over whether one could be a MGTOW while married. As is fitting with someone who truly is a MGTOW, labeling himself wasn’t anything he felt much need to do. MGTOW isn’t a fashion label for hipsters. But it should mean something to those who adopt it. Even if it’s used to spread the good red-pill word to the blue pill guys out there. It means something to those that actually are Men Going Their Own Way. Instead of drama, Cautious calmly described his situation. As someone who had previously decried the possibility of a married MGTOW, I had to admit, by my reckoning he is one. My sympathies on that. You’ll see why I believe he has ‘earned’ the term in his own words below, many parts of his story will ring true to the guys reading this.

I haven’t touched a word of Cautiously Pessimistic’s words, they’re here in full.

So a few weeks back, Spawny offered me a platform for my story.  Ah, the things we say without thinking.

First, let me say up front that FY will be used in lieu of the less abbreviated term, as I'm sensitive to the various filters that litter our web access points.  The term will be used copiously in a moment for reasons that should become apparent in the post.

So to Spawny for offering me this microphone, FY.  FY very much.  (He says with love.)  I'm one of nature's editors, and writing something like this is making my brain bleed.  

Second, let's get the elephant out of the way.  People who say they are special snowflakes are irritating prima donnas that won't deal with reality and insist on reality dealing with them.  That said, I'm a special snowflake.

Specifically, I'm chronically depressed.  "About what" misses the point.  Not about anything.  Or about everything.  Or if you like, I'm depressed about my brain's mishandling of its serotonin levels.  I was a relatively normal boy at 9 in the 70's, and a "DO NOT TOUCH UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES" switch got flipped at puberty.  Life sucks, and according to the script society handed me, I should have suicided a few decades back.  I didn't because FY, that's why.  Contrariness is in my nature, and between that and a simmering rage, I get up EVERY DAY.  I eat food EVERY DAY.  I. BRUSH. MY. TEETH.  EVERY! DAY!  Now to keep the contrariness and rage from driving me insane, it's counterbalanced with a huge dose of humor (or smartassery, which can look similar in the right light), as well as religious conviction.

I bring this up because of those sentences in the middle there.  They're needlessly overwrought, and dilute what points I might eventually get around to by making me sound like a raving drama queen.  But if I'm going to talk about those points I keep mentioning, I need to establish the emotional landscape they come from.  

Okay, but if I'm such a loser that I have to claim epic victory in not having offed myself and managing to do mundane things that most everyone does without thinking, why bother listening to anything I have to say?

Glad you asked.  Here are four reasons:

1.  Though I am a special snowflake in real life, it seems that I'm less special in the manosphere.  I'm both horrified and comforted to learn that others have had experiences similar to what I've gone through.  While I have never met an INTJ in real life (to my knowledge), you can't swing a dead cat in the manosphere without hitting a few (including our host).  So I'm writing this in part because I suspect what I have to say may be relevant to some of the folks reading it.  Lord knows, I'm not advocating the path I took, but if you're in the middle of the dogpile and can't see your 20's or 30's, I offer solace in the form of someone in their 40's who said to the dogpile, "FY, what else you got?"  

2.  I offer this testimony as a reference point.  You may not be on my path (and frankly, I hope you're not), but you may be able to get your bearings based, in part, on my perspective.

3.  Spawny asked me to elaborate on whether married men can be MGTOW.  Frankly, I don't care whether we can or not, but I'll try to elaborate my indifference.

4. Because FY, that's why.  I should have died in my teens.  Here I am in my 40's.  To make things more difficult, on top of my little brain wiring problem, I was completely unprepared for what life threw at me.  No, worse than that.  I was actively sabotaged by everyone I trusted into doing exactly the wrong things when dealing with people.  And FY, I dealt.  Not well, not gracefully, but effectively.  Because here I am.  FY.  (See what I mean about the raving drama queen thing?  Very embarrassing.)

So, that's the dealio.  If none of the above interests you, You probably won't be interested in what's below.  There's lots of anger, pathos and God stuff, too.  Oh, right.  The God stuff.  If taking the God stuff seriously invalidates my opinions to you, you might want to save yourself the hassle and skip out.  You don't have to have the same beliefs as me (and I'd be shocked if you did), but you do need to understand that I take them seriously.

Portrait of the Beta as a Young Man
Still here?  You only have yourself to blame, then. 

Okay, I was born a relatively privileged white guy whose parents moved up from upper-lower class to middle-middle class.  So I grew up with the trappings of a poor-ish lifestyle, and was then given the opportunity to appreciate the finer things in life like indoor plumbing and fake sentiment.  I value that perspective, and still make a point to enjoy hot showers.

I was raised by Blue Pill true believers.  Imagine smarmy 70's relationship gurus with white afros, and you've got the idea.  Their advice in dealing with bullies was for me to say, "Please stop doing that because it makes me feel bad," and all would be well.  I learned quickly not to put their advice into practice, but this was the olden days before the internet, and I had nothing else to replace their advice with.  All the books, TV Shows, magazines, and pastors/teachers were saying the same thing.  I knew it didn't work, but I didn't know what else to do.  The obvious strategy of beating the crap out of people was rigorously discouraged with dire consequences and brainwashing, so that left what?

The strategy I settled on was adopting the persona of crazed loner who might snap at any moment.  It worked somewhat, in that I'm a fairly solid guy with an INTJ death-glare, so casual bullies stayed away.  Those that realized I wouldn't fight back were a problem for several years until a wrestling unit in gym allowed me to beat the ever-loving snot out of one of them, all legal-like. From that point on, they left me alone as well.  

Sounds like a happy ending, right?  Not so fast.  The bulk of my formative years were spent being tormented by bullies I wasn't allowed to touch.  I was incandescent with rage by the time the issue was settled, and all that anger didn't just evaporate.  Plus, being regarded as a crazed loner who might snap at any moment didn't lend itself to a well-adjusted or active social life.  To make matters worse (though I didn't know it at the time) I was getting the full Blue Pill indoctrination regarding women.  And I fell for it hook, line and sinker.  I completely believed women were the same as men, apart from the plumbing.  If I wanted to impress a girl, all I had to do was show how sensitive and understanding I was, and I was golden.  And because that wasn't quite debilitating enough, I'm also a Nice Guy if I don't have my game face on.  

So, skip ahead to college.  Things were never better.  Still very bad, though.  I was trying to figure out how to deal with women.  Burning with desperate lust and having that rage bomb in the back of my mind didn't give me the air of breezy self-confidence needed to do well.  Plus, arrogance (what we called confidence back then) was a turn off for women.  Everyone said so.  Including the women.  They would tell you at length how annoying they found their boyfriend's cocky attitude.  Um.

So a few points:

1.  Yeah, I was stupid.  My real-world observations flew in the face of every authority figure in my life, and I chose to believe the authorities over reality.  What a dumbass.  Glad THAT doesn't happen anymore.

2.  Two saving graces kept me out of permanent InCel isolation:  First, I was pretty.  Or rather, I cleaned up well.  Although I was doing everything wrong, I was hawt enough to garner occasional interest.  At least until I was able to show them how sensitive and caring I was and send them screaming.  Second, looking back now, I imagine spending all those years being the crazed loner who might snap at any moment gave me an air of modest danger and mystery that gave them modest tingles.

3. My first girlfriend really did a number on me.  I had terrible oneitis, she knew it, and kept me bouncing between LJBF and FWB.  Then she started openly cheating.  Fortunately, my Blue Pill training came to my rescue:  I was caring, understanding, and stood there and took it.  After a couple of years of this treatment, I took a deep breath, flayed a patch of skin off my forearm, permanently broke it off with her, and took up drinking.  Another happy ending.

So leaving college for the workaday life of an IT guy, I had some experience with women, but the only real positive (looking back) was in realizing that if it was a choice between being a beta chump and being alone, I'd rather be alone.  Ironically, this realization led to an easier time with women, though none of it lasting, and most of it awkward.  I was hawt, I was initially aloof, and I was still impressing the hell out of them by showing how sensitive and understanding I was.

The God Stuff
I was raised as a Christian.  Now let me say up front that I'm not a good Christian, but I have my moments.  This upbringing was at odds with the liberal bubble I was raised in; but for whatever reason, I never got the memo that I shouldn't have been taking that God stuff seriously.  I expect part of that had to do with depression.  Being suicidal tends to lead to a preoccupation with the metaphysical.  To make a long story short (too late) by my late 20's/early 30's I had collected the following revelations.

1. I want to serve God.
2. God loves us.
3. God has a plan.

I won't go into lengthy details about the whys and wherefores, as this isn't really the site for that.  Suffice it to say that with those three fundamentals firmly fixed in my mind, I had a sufficient answer to my depression.  Yes, I was still depressed, with all that entailed.  No, I wasn't going to commit suicide.  That much was settled.  Further, I was not merely going to survive, but attempt to prosper.  To that end, I gave up drinking and got married in my late 30's.  Well, it made sense at the time.

Now you Tell Me?
The marriage started going wobbly almost immediately.  I knew enough to marry someone whose parents were still married, whose siblings hadn't divorced, who at least knew to say she hadn't ridden the carousel, and who didn't already have kids.  However, married life just didn't seem to stabilize no matter how sensitive and understanding I was.  Then her siblings started getting divorced.  

Despite being a dumbass, I wasn't so stupid as to not see what was coming.  I started looking for anything that wasn't blue pill that could be used to recover and maintain a failing marriage.  That's when I started finding voices like Dalrock, Mentu, and M3.  From there, it's been a meander across the manosphere looking for bits and pieces I can use to stabilize and improve the marriage.  At first, I was just studying the ideas and trying to fit them together.  When my wife started talking about how she didn't want us to get divorced (Um, who said anything about divorce, dear?) I figured it was time to put what I had found so far into practice.  

The next time she said she didn't want us to get divorced, I threw down a divorce petition, and explained to her that if she wanted to fill it out, I'd drop it off at the courthouse and we could end it there.  Otherwise, shut up about divorce.  The crazed loner who might snap at any moment was dusted off and put into play.  A motorcycle was bought, and a life that didn't involve her was developed.  And while the marriage isn't stable, it's in better shape than before.  It's not a happy marriage, but it has its moments.

Okay, So What Now?
The reason I brought up the God Stuff is because that is the only motive I have for not initiating a divorce myself, what with not having kids in the mix.  If I end up getting divorced anyway, I sure as hell won't get married again.  Unless a man has religious convictions, he'd be a fool to get married.  As for whether a married man can be MGTOW, from my perspective, he pretty much has to be if he wants to stay married.  My dream of an idyllic marriage to a loving wife I can shower with affection is dead.  However, I've still got a bead on keeping the marriage alive through studied indifference and animosity.  And this buys me time to figure out how to improve the marriage, if possible.

I'm cautiously pessimistic about my chances.  

Welcome brother.

I don’t mind people discussing their religious views if they believe the discussion will be helpful. I just don’t have any. As long as it’s civil, say what you want. I have no issue with the discussions on Dalrock, for example, at all. I have read there for years, though I seldom comment. Basically, I am not the militant proselytising atheist that you seek, I just don’t believe, and I never will.

Posted in INTJ, Marriage, MGTOW, Why
103 comments on “A married MGTOW speaks. Elements of what he says will sound familiar to most here.
  1. Yoda says:

    with an INTJ death-glare

    Powerful it is.
    Deploy carefully one should.


  2. Spawny Get says:

    Some of us are just naturally gifted at looking pissed off…


  3. Spawny Get says:

    I asked my wife three times if she was going to come back to me, each time she said no, we should set each other free. I still reckon she was shocked when I said fine, then we’re getting divorced…she followed her mummy’s script, I didn’t find her daddy’s one acceptable. I had told her that long before we got married. Seems she didn’t believe me. Most men, even nice men, have a line that they won;t cross.


  4. Yoda says:

    When my wife started talking about how she didn’t want us to get divorced

    Leverage you do have.


  5. Yoda says:

    As for whether a married man can be MGTOW, from my perspective, he pretty much has to be if he wants to stay married.

    MGTOW with money probably not.


  6. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cautiously Pessimistic,
    Thanks for writing that. We’re all INTJs on this bus, so a lot of it has to ring true for all of us.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. theasdgamer says:

    I can relate to this post. I hit the suicide phase 18-19 yo. PUA of sorts until 19. The start of my pussy-teasing career at 15. Wasn’t ready for sex for years. Became a Christian after having a fling/losing virginity at 19. (I probably became a Christian for different reasons than most. Not that anyone besides me cares.) Forgot all I learned as a PUA and swallowed the Blue Pill. Did stupid beta stuff. Five years of voluntary celibacy. Finally ditched a lot of the beta. First gf at 21 (no, no sex, just petting). Yeah, I teased my 1st gf, too. Loved her madly. Denied her sex and all that. 2nd gf and eventual wife after 1st gf broke up with me. Kids, house, job after college. Yeah, I teased my wife from time to time, too. Not often cuz ur not really sposed ter do dat.

    Not INTJ here. I’m comfortable with any poisonality, yuk, yuk, yuk. Mildly autistic.

    I’m currently black-knighting as a pussy-tease. It gets me lots of drama which I enjoy. Never really cared whether I was MGTOW. Thinking about it, being a rogue and all, I probably am. IDGAF. Oh, and FY, too, yuk, yuk, yuk.


  8. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    @Yoda –
    Leverage you do have.

    Nah, I just didn’t get her tone right. Her saying that wasn’t earnest sentiment, it was a passive-aggressive threat. She was dipping her toe in the divorce pool to see what the water was like. I made it as hot as I could and she’s stayed away from it since. We’ll see how long it lasts.

    @Fuzzy –
    We’re all INTJs on this bus…

    It’s astonishing to me how rare we appear to be in real life vs. how crowded it is here. I blame selection bias.

    @asdg –
    Never really cared whether I was MGTOW.

    Apparently, there are people that do. The blazer badge and membership card must really be something.

    @Spawny –
    Basically, I am not the militant proselytising atheist that you seek,

    I didn’t think you were, Spawny. But I know there are not a small number of folks that regard religious devotion to be the mark of an idiot that shouldn’t be countenanced. I was just trying to save them some aggravation.


  9. Farm Boy says:

    INTJ death-glare

    I was recently on a tour bus in Hawaii. The bus driver/ tour guide was in a good mood and asked if there were any newlyweds on the bus. There was one set. He announced that he was going to serenade the man and his princess. I mumbled, “That is all the world needs is more princesses”. The lady in the seat in front of me turned around and glared at me. I glared right back. One should not challenge INTJs to such contests.


  10. Spawny Get says:

    This post has also been put up here

    Comments there also. A site for men only BTW.


  11. Liz says:

    This saddens me greatly. 😦
    When my husband comes home from his trip, I will have him read this and see if he can offer any ideas. He’s really good at stuff like this. We’ve been married a long, long while and have a very good relationship. I’d offer advise myself but I’m not certain exactly what makes the formula ‘work’ the way it does with us.

    He definitely doesn’t treat me coldly, though, or anything close (I can count on one hand the number of times in over 20 years that we’ve had a fight that made him ‘cold’ towards me but that never lasted longer than a day). I’d be very depressed if that were the case.


  12. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    Thanks, Liz.
    I’m happy to listen to advice, though I’m a bit hard-headed about implementing advice I don’t understand and haven’t tested previously. Fool me once, and all that.

    I’d like to think the measured indifference and animosity is a phase we can eventually move past. However, given that I allowed myself to be her beta for such a significantly long time, it may take several years of heavy alpha to get us back in some kind of healthy balance. Or I may have to accept the idea of being more alpha than I’m comfortable with. The Nice Guy takes a lot of killin’ to die.


  13. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cautiously Pessimistic,
    I hope that you can salvage your marriage. I might be in better shape, while there is still a lot of “nice guy” to kill, I’ve never married. There is no past to overcome.


  14. Cill says:

    Fuzzy said “We’re all INTJs on this bus”. I hadn’t thought about that! Is Yoda?

    Cautiously Pessimistic, I’ve had no experience of marriage or LTR, which makes it difficult for me to contribute a worthwhile comment on your post. On the other hand, men like you and Blurkel can teach me a lot.

    She treats you better when you’re more of a bastard. How far does this go, I wonder. The worse you treat her the better she treats you? If you give her a fate worse than death she’ll turn into a unicorn?

    Ignoring the legal aspects for a minute, do you think there’s a maximum level of badness beyond which you can’t go without her responding negatively?


  15. Spawny Get says:

    I think that the practical limit for most men is that they have to like themselves at the end of the day. I’d rather not have a woman, than have to continually game a woman. It’s not my nature to be be like that with anyone I’d share a roof with.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Spawny Get says:

    I know that I wrote it, but as with this thread, I was expecting more comments on

    Are people worried about commenting on serious threads such as this one and that one? We’re all friends here, if you have an opinion, please consider writing about it.


  17. Cill says:

    From reading Blurkel, and now CP, I realize I need marriage like a hole in the head. If ever I did decide to change my MGHOW status (there’s a woman in the wings right now) I’d better be sure she responds well to me in my default state. But how can I be sure she won’t change? That’s the question I always come back to.


  18. Cill says:

    “Are people worried about commenting on serious threads such as this one and that one”
    Good question. God only knows I’m not easily intimidated, but I admit I felt too inexperienced to comment here. There’s no way I can help CP. But… he can help me. Hence my question. You’ve already given a good answer but I’d like his as well.

    As for the other post (https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2014/12/08/caught-up-in-the-blowback/) I’ve been away and haven’t looked at it yet. I’m about to do so.


  19. Spawny Get says:

    Blowback was sparked by Tarn’s post. But they’re differently focused. Both are worth reading IMHO 😉


  20. Spawny Get says:

    Sleep soon though. Good night imminently…


  21. molly says:

    Hi! Cill says he’s “inexperienced” OMG so what am I? “Green” doesn’t come close unless it’s Yoda. 😉 I’d huggum coz he looks like he’s not used to the role of huggee or kissee so I’d kissum too! 😀

    I would be grateful for a good man, no need for him to mistreat me. One man already tried to on me and it didn’t work. I’d treat a good man well from the start and I always would. 🙂


  22. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Good night, Spawny.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. molly says:

    Hello and goodnight Unca Spawny 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Spawny Get says:

    Check out ‘Dune’, in it there was a special mark placed on the forehead of those who had been ‘Imperial Conditioned’ Dr Huey (iirc) had one. They were guaranteed reliable.

    We could do that for red pilled woman, or maybe just tattoo ‘gullible&dangerous – avoid’ on the forehead of all unconditioned women?

    Damn, I’m so smart I even scare myself sometimes.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. molly says:

    I’m not sure I’m red pilled. Can there be a red pilled woman? I hate Feminism. My parents taught me about it, all the way back to post American Civil War and a bunch of women in State of New York saying “now we’ve freed the slaves who’s next? Why, us of course! We’ll be the next freed slaves!” (not in those exact words 😉 )


  26. Spawny Get says:

    Red pill? Yes
    MGTOW? No

    They even started the progressive stack back then. Feminists blather, supportive men? Sit down and STFU

    A demain, ma cherie


  27. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    @Cill- Ignoring the legal aspects for a minute, do you think there’s a maximum level of badness beyond which you can’t go without her responding negatively?

    I would assume so. Then again, there are plenty of women that cling to their abusive men. But Spawny is correct. It’s not just a question of how bad I should treat her, but whether or not I’m willing to be that sort of man. There are things I’m willing to do and things I’m not, even if it would improve the relationship. Because I still have to live with myself, regardless of what happens with her.

    And just so people don’t get the wrong idea, it’s not like I snarl and spit at her every time I see her. There’s just a level of coldness I have to keep between us or she starts injecting drama into our lives. It’s like one of us has to be chasing the other, and chasing her ends in divorce. So she’s gotta chase me. The best I can do is keep my distance so she can chase.

    It’s not fun, and it’s not a constructive way to build a life together. But I signed on the dotted line, and apparently, this is the part I have to play for now.

    I’d better be sure she responds well to me in my default state. But how can I be sure she won’t change?

    Yeah, that’s a question, isn’t it? I think it’s safer to assume she will. Like I said, if you don’t have religious convictions (and I’ve no idea if you do), don’t get married. If you do have religious convictions, and don’t need to get married, don’t get married. And if you have religious convictions and need to get married, be ready.

    Liked by 1 person

  28. molly says:

    Does she know why you’re cold? If it happened to me and I knew “he’s only cold so I’ll treat him better” I would think “so I’d better start treating him better!” So yes it would work 😉


  29. Spawny Get says:

    Action in Sydney, it seems…turn on t’telly


  30. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    Yeah, you’d think just explaining it to her would do the trick, right? How long did it take me to give that idea up? Long enough that I’m embarrassed to admit it.

    Liked by 1 person

  31. Spawny Get says:

    Most of us were horrified when we took the red pill CP…Not just you, not even close.


  32. Cill says:


    Thanks mate. I’m not religious, and have no great need to get married. The “woman in the wings” is hotter than molten gold, is all.

    “I think it’s safer to assume she will”. Yes that’s the assumption I’ve made. There’s too big a risk in putting my life in the hands of a woman. She’s not the only risk. There’s a bigger, much more worrying one. With the best will in the world, she can’t stop the Feminist Establishment from continually shifting the goal posts until staying in a marriage will become a crime for a man. Eventually, breathing the air in the same room as her will be rape. Our children, if any, will be indoctrinated informers for the State. Sounds like an exaggeration, but 20 years ago people wouldn’t have believed the madness of today could ever eventuate either.

    Not worth the risk.


  33. Cill says:

    “20 years ago people wouldn’t have believed the madness of today could ever eventuate either.”
    Okay, change “20 years ago” to “Back in the 1980s”. I know that’s true because of heard my parents and others of their generation say so.


  34. Cill says:

    From Channel 9 in Sydney: Looks like 13 hostages, 2 gunman, at least one “backpack” in Martin Place. One gunman now handcuffed.


  35. Cautiously Pessimistic says:

    The “woman in the wings” is hotter than molten gold, is all.

    Actually, gold has one of the colder melting points compared to other metals. And that’s even excluding the various alloys. 😉

    No reason to dump her. Just don’t marry her.

    What’s the old Viking saying? “Do not praise the meal until it’s eaten.”

    Hey! Posthumous marriages may be just the ticket!


  36. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    I think a case could be made for things going in any possible direction. One thing, I don’t know if it’s true that if you bring a girl home from overseas that she is going to turn into a fembot by being exposed to the culture.
    Is there someone far, far away rhat likes making you sandwiches?


  37. Cill says:

    “Actually, gold has one of the colder melting points”
    I know. As I typed it I pictured her face and chose a hot colour.

    “Is there someone far, far away rhat likes making you sandwiches?”
    Fuzzy there’s someone right here who likes making me sandwiches. 😉


  38. Cill says:

    She might even knock up some sammies for you blokes as well. How many of you here right now? I’ll assume 4. If that’s too many, I’ll have the spare ones.


  39. Cill says:

    Sydney: At least 2 Islamic militants holding 13 to 50 hostages in a cafe in Martin Place (near Elizabeth Street)


  40. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    I would very much like a sandwich. Unless you have trained Dog or Horse to make them, there must be a human there. Who could it be?

    Liked by 1 person

  41. molly says:

    🐻 🙄 🐻


  42. Cill says:

    “No reason to dump her. Just don’t marry her.”
    No LTR either. Break up of LTR has divorce laws applied to it here. FWB is a possibility, but I think it would send the wrong signals.


  43. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    🐻 🙄 🐻 I thought you had gone home.


  44. Cill says:

    Okay I’m munching on a sammie here. Nice. Help yourselves boys. They’re pretty special. The lettuce and tomato and spring onions were all growing happily in the sun not more than 5 minutes ago. Fresh as.


  45. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    It’s sad that the guys have to leap to defensive conclusions. It shouldn’t be that way.


  46. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Munch, munch, munch, and slurp!


  47. molly says:

    “Yeah, you’d think just explaining it to her would do the trick, right? How long did it take me to give that idea up?”
    If she doesn’t want a divorce, why doesn’t she want a happy husband? 😮 Is she a sadist?


  48. Cill says:

    “It’s sad that the guys have to leap to defensive conclusions. It shouldn’t be that way.”
    True, Fuzzy, but it’s the smart thing to do if I don’t want to end up in CP’s or Blurkel’s situation.


  49. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Not to make fun of you but, it’s comforting to see you confused by all this too.
    I thought it was just us guys.


  50. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    What we have been discussing is a change that has happened since the advent of feminism. In the old days, women wanted to keep it together. This is not small.


  51. Cill says:

    CP it’s a good question. “If she doesn’t want a divorce, why doesn’t she want a happy husband?”
    I would’ve thought it takes 2 for a marriage to be happy. If you’re not happy she’s not happy. Does she like hurting you, or like being miserable (oxymoron?) or is this part of her being a control freak? Whatever the answer is, with hindsight were there any signs at all that she was going to turn out as she has?

    Bear in mind that Molly and I come from stable marriages. We have no experience of the norm. Your case is closer to the norm than ours is.


  52. molly says:

    Anyone like a burrito to follow the sammies?
    🌯 🌯 🌯 🌯


  53. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Yes, please, Miss Molly!


  54. Yoda says:

    Is Yoda?

    INTJ I am.
    Powerful NT thinking is.
    Ignore it world does.


  55. Yoda says:

    Sammiches -the canary in the mine it is.


  56. Yoda says:

    If it happened to me and I knew “he’s only cold so I’ll treat him better” I would think “so I’d better start treating him better!”

    Logically you think.
    Perhaps women you are not.


  57. Yoda says:

    At Jedi graduation ceremony today I was.
    Featured speaker single parents of graduates he did praise.
    Chancellor took a selfie and big fuss of it she did make.
    Embarrassing this is.


  58. molly says:

    “Logically you think.”
    Yes! Not all like fembots do we think o_O


  59. Yoda says:

    This is not small.

    Hear that often I do.


  60. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    It’s not so much the sandwiches as it is the concern for the significant other’s welfare.
    It’s about caring.

    Thank you and “burp”.


  61. Yoda says:

    Thank you and “burp”.

    Bears much methane in woods they would make.


  62. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    A Chancellor that would foster narcissism? Not good.
    Keynote speaker praising irresponsible parenting. More not good.
    Molly making us virtual burritos. Good.


  63. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    It just struck me, hence the second comment. Between the speaker and the Chancellor, they don’t care what men thiink. Our good opinion is not needed, wanted, or of any value to them.
    They would make terrible roommates.


  64. Spawny Get says:

    Beat Molly (past tense. not an instruction nor a request)

    Official site stats

    Spawny Get 210
    molly 209
    Yoda 205
    FuzzieWuzzie 203
    Cill 65
    Liz 49
    Padawan 11
    * Based on the 1000 most recent comments.


  65. Liz says:

    Cill: “Bear in mind that Molly and I come from stable marriages. We have no experience of the norm. Your case is closer to the norm than ours is.”

    Sad, but true. Hard to believe everyone is so miserable, electively
    (and I don’t mean marriage itself makes one miserable, I’ve never understood that one, still don’t, candidly).


  66. Liz says:

    It’s weird that women are so wired for drama. When I read Sophia’s commentary (just thinking of the thread cited), about 90 percent of the time she reminds me of myself.


  67. Spawny Get says:

    But Liz, I have a feeling you might find, with a genetic history check, that you are part unicorn too. Females that lurk around manosphere blogs do seem to be more mentally healthy than the loiterers at the ‘other’ kind of blog (The Fembotia Daily Foghorn. Daily Misandrist. Foaming Mouthed Penis Hater Journal. Jizabel etc)


  68. Yoda says:

    Beat Molly

    More emoticons she does have.


  69. Yoda says:

    It’s weird that women are so wired for drama

    Good post topic for Farm Boy this would be.


  70. Yoda says:

    genetic history check, that you are part unicorn too.

    Part space alien it would be.
    Multi-colored complexion she has.
    Give-away this is.


  71. Yoda says:

    A Chancellor that would foster narcissism? Not good.
    Keynote speaker praising irresponsible parenting. More not good.

    In a consistently high ranked “miserable city” it did happen.


  72. Spawny Get says:

    “Good post topic for Farm Boy this would be.”

    mmmmm…tomorrow for me works, Wednesday also it does

    new post up


  73. Cill says:

    Verbs at end of sentences do not for Spawny Get come easily.


  74. Spawny Get says:

    well, matey, you just fupped it up too!
    I may be guilty of a slight success shortfall, that I may not be able to entirely refute, but et tu Mohau!


  75. theasdgamer says:

    Cill, jf12 has gone on and on about how some women have personality disorders that cause them to be happy if they cause grief to a man.

    Liked by 1 person

  76. theasdgamer says:

    @ liz

    about 90 percent of the time she reminds me of myself.

    So ebul liz only gets 10% of the total consciousness? P


  77. Cill says:

    “et tu Mohau”
    Poliktically Incorrect this is
    Meohau it should be


  78. Spawny Get says:

    Coincidentally, I am thinking about getting a cat.


  79. Cill says:

    theasdgamer, once more I’m reminded of my newness. jf12?
    Another thing for me to search on. The volume of info is too great for mortal man.


  80. Cill says:

    not much Coincidental about you a cat getting Get SpawnyGet Spawny


  81. Cill says:

    (My last comment was nonsensical BTW)

    [SG – wait till you see my next one!]

    Liked by 1 person

  82. Spawny Get says:

    “how some women have personality disorders that cause them to be happy if they cause grief to a man.”

    I can see that. “I’m unhappy, in fact psychologically incapable of being happy, but it could be worse…I could be my husband (that I enjoy persecuting, withholding sex from, bitching at, bitching about, demeaning wherever we go)”. Some people might see that as a victory, of sorts.

    Gene Hackman in Mississississippippi Burning told the tale of his pop and the black neighbour’s mule… (no sex involved, poison)


  83. Cill says:

    (It was intended to wound and cause offense to animals, men, and of course, the ubiquitous victims-by-default)


  84. Cill says:

    “how some women have personality disorders that cause them to be happy if they cause grief to a man.”
    Thereby creating an unhappy relationship for them both. Without so much as glancing at jf12, I’m already inclined to believe it. This behavior by women is that of an insanely stupid creature.

    I’d rather know about Spawny’s Cruft-quality, poof-shaped, fluffed and coiffed (by him) pied-purple cat.


  85. Spawny Get says:

    I was thinking ginger tom, but it depends on which one of the litter my mate can catch.

    Liked by 3 people

  86. Padawan says:

    “I was thinking ginger tom, but it depends on which one of the litter my mate can catch.”

    For the first time in all of his disciplined artistic career, Padawan breaks out of verse into:



  87. Spawny Get says:

    You know why this response is so insulting?

    All my alleged jokes get nothing. My biggest laugh comes from telling the absolute truth. It burnses, precious, it burnses.


  88. Cill says:

    Let me join in with Padawan:

    (the joke I’m laughing at (your joke at 15 December, 2014 at 8:31 pm) was the absolute truth… wasn’t it?


  89. Cill says:

    Ah I see! it was the absolute truth re that little weirdo Padawan. Understood 😉
    Even Moe’s fancy will be tickled pink by that.
    (What the hell am I talking about? Can anyone tell me?)


  90. Spawny Get says:

    Not a Scooby.

    There’s a litter of wild cats on a local farm. They’re newly weaned with winter coming hard. They aren’t likely to make it, basically. Even though they are fed food to help them. I said I’d take one in. Sight unseen, I said I fancied a ginger tom. I was told I’d get what he could catch…Maybe ginger…Maybe a tom, maybe a queen.


  91. Padawan says:

    A comedy wizard is Spawny
    Most jokers appeal to the horny
    But Spawny, forsooth,
    Simply talks truth,
    And gets the laugh of the morning!

    Liked by 1 person

  92. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Didn’t Mark Twain say that humor was born out of paain? Does the truth hurt? ‘Nuff said.

    Liked by 2 people

  93. Cill says:

    “Sight unseen, I said I fancied a ginger tom.”
    A shyster saw a mark


  94. Moehau Man says:

    “It burnses, precious, it burnses.”
    “Get off him Sam!”
    “Just one more stroke, Mr Frodo”

    Liked by 1 person

  95. Cill says:

    Fuzzy, re your video, that guy is clever with his dog voice.


  96. Cill says:

    Spawny, talking about sense of humour:
    Surely Moe at 17 December, 2014 at 4:13 am is deserving of a Like.


  97. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    He’s versitile. He can do other animals with accents!


  98. Cill says:

    I’m glad he got away fine. Beavers are pretty staunch. He thought the human was a threat and he was prepared to have a go there.


  99. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    He could do some damage to my shin!


  100. Cill says:

    He buck teeth could chomp your shin down like a tree


  101. FuzzieWuzzie says:

    Cill, on a happier note

    and something else that you may find fun from the same guys

    Liked by 1 person

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